Are you TTC boy because you want one or because your DH wants one?

[mkarntz1980]

Just wondering we at WWAPP on FB were having a conversation if we had all girls if we would sway for a boy...some moms said no, a few said yes but only go give their husband a son. So if you are swaying for a boy, is it because you want a boy or to give your husband a son?

Michelle

[TTC5]

Both :)

[Kiara]

Because I want:-) I think dh wants a girl more than a boy hihi.

[Plum3]

I am swaying for DH mainly.

[Hobbermittens]

I swayed for me. I already had a boy but wanted another. DH was fine with having girls, and would have been fine stopping at 3 kids. I had to convince him to sway for one last baby.

[coocoobananas]

I know I have 2 boys, but I know without a doubt if I had 2 girls or even 1, I would want a boy! I think even more so!

[Cinss]

I was hardcore swaying for DP but because it has been taking so long to fall pregnant my desire for a baby has taken over my desire to give him a son. And the fact that i havent been able to get him to quit smoking and drinking for our sway when i have, tells me he is not behind swaying 100% so why should i even try.

[Princess of Pink]

I am sure I answered this already!!

[Flava]

Only because it was "put in our ears" so to say that we need a boy. And more for DH but he says he don't care .For me I always wanted girls never a boy. So it's more for everyone else to show we can make one too? I don't know...

[dloui128]

I really want a boy, DH says he doesn't care either way

[nuthinbutpink]

My DH would have stopped after the 2 girls. It was me.

[atomic sagebrush]

I always wanted a boy(s). I'm just greedy and wanted a girl too LOL.

[RedCanoe]

I would have wanted a boy if we only had girls (and I'm sure DH would have as well).

[Foxy]

Mostly for me.

[n710]

Mostly for me and DS. DH always didn't care as much as me, but was happy to have both experiences

[Pearl327]

I would say a bit of both

I have always pictured myself with a mixed family (at least 2 boys and 2 girls + an i don't mind) so I cannot imagine not having a DS. I was convinced DD was a DS and I was really put out when I found out at the 20 week scan. And when I was telling people that I was having a DD the reaction was how could it be anything else as I have 5 sisters no brothers and DH is the only boy with 6 sisters so there is also a little bit of me that wants so say see I can have boys too.

[purplepoet20]

I do already have 2 boys but if I had 1 girl or even 10 girls I would want a boy. I have always wanted boys and lots of them (6-8) and I never really wanted a girl. I am swaying for a girl because DH is his mother's only child and he wants to give her a girl. Sometimes I hope to keep having boys so I could have a house full of little men but other time I want this to be my last baby.... If I would have never known of DH desire to give his mom a girl I would be happy with just 2 boys or more and I would have never swayed!

[tinksmagic]

I had a G & B but wanted one more of each. Hubby always talked of having a son (but didn't want kids, go fig!) and when we got 2 DD's, I was Hell bent on having another son, til I got it in my head to have twins (just easier to raise given age differences). I'm still Hell bent, hubby wants the boys, but I WANT THE BOYS!!!! :)

[Super Mom of 6 Girls]

BOTH!

[The Anchor]

It was both of us...I think mostly because I was convinced that my first was a boy, but she was all girl. I mean, I didn't even believe the u/s tech, I thought she was wrong. So I had it in my head that I was having a boy, then I NEEDED to have a boy (although my DD is AMAZING). I did get my DS...now I'm pg with #3 and back to the gut feeling it's a boy...guess we'll see!

[4Giffins]

With both of our DDs my DH wanted a son. Now that they are here he is perfectly content and Im the one pushing for #3 to try for a boy. I think he wants a DS just as bad but is convinced he will only have girls..hopefully he is wrong! :)

[atomic sagebrush]

4 Giffins, tell him I'm sending a massive amoutn of atomic blue dust his way!!!!

[mollisol]

We both would like to have a boy, but DH is convinced he can only make girls.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi and welcome Mollisol - have your DH read this! ALL men make both X and Y 50-50. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/sperm-qualities/552-guess-what-men-make-50-50-x-y-sperm.html

[Elements]

at the end of the day, we both dont care what we get. we want 3 children and have 2 girls so we think, where's the harm in trying to see if we can get a son.

[praying4boy]

Its me who wants a boy... DH said he doesnt care if we have another DD. I think it makes swaying easier if the DH wants a boy that way he will actually take his supplements and stick to the diet.

[hopeful0913]

We both don't really care as either one would be a blessing. But DH would like a big brother first :)

[Cinss]

Its me who wants a boy... DH said he doesnt care if we have another DD. I think it makes swaying easier if the DH wants a boy that way he will actually take his supplements and stick to the diet.

Not in my case, DP didnt do anything to help with the sway, and it was him that wanted a boy.

[xxxx]

I am ttcing boy because of the society today, my experience and for my DH.
-Society makes a man without a son feel less of a man and believe you me as the years goes by and you approach menopause without a son, he is likely to try with a younger woman. Trust me, I have seen it happen.
-My experience is based on fact that my father neglected and treated my mother badly because of a DS. As soon as I was born and he realised he now has 5 DS, he abandoned her in the hospital with me as a new baby and went for her best friend who eventually had 2 DS. I have seen men whos wives I know and can confirm that their DH is happy with DDs but their DH now has DSs with other women without their knowledge. Their DH even confessed to friends that they need DS but only makes their DW believe they are ok with DDs.
-My DH doesn't care about baby gender, he loves babies to bits. But I have seen his friend try to rub it off his nose that their first is a DS and when ask why they are so puffed up about it, they simply reply " Aah that show am a man".
I just want him to feel good inside, even if I know he doesn't care.


It is easier for men to be happy when they have DSs and only 1/no DD. Believe me they feel good inside. Though I have seen that marriages tends to survive more with both gender babies in the home. I really don't understand why. I once read studies to surpport this but I can't remember the site.

[atomic sagebrush]

This is a pretty hot button topic but here's a link to a good explanation of the study and both interpretations Couples With Daughters More Likely to Divorce - ABC News (http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Wellness/daughters-breed-divorce-boys-blessing-daughters-curse/story?id=11804444)

This study is one of those where the science is interesting but the interpretations get in the way. I don't like the douche-y explanations the scientists come up with...the first set is like, oh, it's because girls suck and dads hate tehm, then the second set is like, no, it's because women who have boys are doormats and not empowered. GAG. I think their science sucks and the whole thing kinda pisses me off.

I suspect, taking Trivers Willard into account, it's because people who are higher in social status have more boys, and it's a hell of a lot easier to stay married when you're rich than when you're poor. Mystery solved, where's my Nobel prize LOL

[Adia]

I suspect, taking Trivers Willard into account, it's because people who are higher in social status have more boys, and it's a hell of a lot easier to stay married when you're rich than when you're poor. Mystery solved, where's my Nobel prize LOL

Your Nobel prize is on its way...just write the book and we'll get it for you!

I have to agree about the poverty aspect, so interesting. Most fascinating book I have ever read "A framework for understanding poverty" helped me understand a lot of what I had seen but couldn't put into words. Simply fascinating and once you add Trivers Willard idea into that, a lot of things make a lot more sense!!!

[xxxx]

This is a pretty hot button topic but here's a link to a good explanation of the study and both interpretations Couples With Daughters More Likely to Divorce - ABC News (http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Wellness/daughters-breed-divorce-boys-blessing-daughters-curse/story?id=11804444)

This study is one of those where the science is interesting but the interpretations get in the way. I don't like the douche-y explanations the scientists come up with...the first set is like, oh, it's because girls suck and dads hate tehm, then the second set is like, no, it's because women who have boys are doormats and not empowered. GAG. I think their science sucks and the whole thing kinda pisses me off.

I suspect, taking Trivers Willard into account, it's because people who are higher in social status have more boys, and it's a hell of a lot easier to stay married when you're rich than when you're poor. Mystery solved, where's my Nobel prize LOL

Hello AS, nice links, thanks a lot. But there are still cases where the new lady has DS for the same DH living under same condition. I still believe in feeding habbit which leads to acidic/alkaline PH down there.
People could still have a high status and end up with boys or vice versa.
I just think the men loves blue better than pink because of there ego. Girls are wonderful even in adulthood. They seem to care a lot about their parents actually.

[SaraLou]

In contrast this is an interesting article in UK newspaper, the Telegraph which claims families with two daughters are the happiest! Want to be happy? have two daughters - Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/8429386/Want-to-be-happy-have-two-daughters.html)
x

[xxxx]

In contrast this is an interesting article in UK newspaper, the Telegraph which claims families with two daughters are the happiest! Want to be happy? have two daughters - Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/8429386/Want-to-be-happy-have-two-daughters.html)
x

Nice one Saralou.. very interesting but I would like to confirm the DH of the lady I talked about when I mentioned has a lady out there who now has 2 DS without the knowledge of his DW actually is from Leeds, England..................so survey sometimes not so accurate. I also had a colleague in Leeds who also confirmed he would't have had plans to marry his girlfriend if she had given birth to a DD... sad. The interesting aspect is these men do not let their DW or girlfriends even have the slightest idea of their thougths wrt baby gender these days. They claim to appreciate either.

[Mum to three girls]

Interesting thread... We really want a 4th so our 3rd can have a playmate, our big girls are incredibly close and it's lovely (although they fight like cats and dogs too). I would be completely happy with another girl but I know DH would prefer a theoretical boy over a theoretical girl, mainly so he can have that father/son relationship. That said, he loves his daughters and if we have a 4th girl I know he'd never consider our completed family any less than perfect. He doesn't have obvious favourites but has a very sweet relationship with DD3 - they just adore each other - and she was "supposed" to be his boy.

That's why I'm swaying (and apart from the breastfeeding i'm doing well, I think!) but I won't be at all devastated if we get pregnant with DD4.

[luvalittleman]

I am also a mum to three girls who are the loves of my life. If I could have it over and could only have one sex , I would still have three girls over three boys as they seem to suit my perfectionist personality better :wink:
That being said, I also think it's terribly unfair to keep having all the same sex children if you are keen for family balancing (guess who's a libran....) as I think it's important for each parent to be able to pass on their knowledge and personal experiences with a child that shares the same interests and can relate (i.e. my girls have no interest in surfing or football).
They do however sit and do crafty things with me which I have always liked and I personally think my husband should have someone to share his passions with.
So in my case, while I know my husband is wanting a boy due to the fact his limit was two kids (haha) the desire to have a son has been driven by me. In all honesty though.....if I'd had three boys I'd be over at the pink swaying forum so I guess it's just my nature....

[babygirl]

just wanted to add that we are by no means rich, or even well off and have 6 boys, so out goes that theory lol

[xxxx]

just wanted to add that we are by no means rich, or even well off and have 6 boys, so out goes that theory lol

Well said babygirl, same goes to my mum who had 5girls when my father was far too rich a politician than when his second wife had boys. Infact he was literally bankrupts with hadly no money available when the boys where born. lol!

[atomic sagebrush]

just wanted to add that we are by no means rich, or even well off and have 6 boys, so out goes that theory lol

We aren't either babygirl, but it's just a tendency. The tendencies are important because they can tell us about what things actually do sway - as in, our bodies don't know how much change is in our pockets but across the population, being financially better off may mean better access to nutritious foods.

[zebaniee]

Both