Timing it just right....

[Kris217]

Well next month i will be trying to get pregnant,(for a boy) i am in a same sex relationship and our donor is in Sydney so 2 hours from my house. We'll be staying near him as he works long hours and doesn't drive so asking him to come to us is a bit much.

Anyway, it's impossible to plan it this way. I have to wait to see if AF is on time then if my ovulation is on time too so it's going to be one of those day by day things which isn't useful when you need to book a hotel, arrange a babysitter and dog sitter!

So we were thinking of heading to Sydney the day i get my positive test to do an insemination that night. We are planning on doing it for about 3 nights...does this plan sound good? Or would night insemination then next morning then that night work better?

I know our situations are quite different but in the end it's still making a baby so your opinions and advise will be greatly appreciated!

Thanks,
Kristy

[Kris217]

Also curious to know if anyone has bought Clomid online from overseas? Just found out that was possible.

[TTC5]

Hey Kris!! I hope it works well next month for you and your partner :)
I do not know much about sperm donation but wanted to ask will he be giving you "samples/sperm" whatever you like to call it sorry if that came out offensive but ykwim.. in one day? How long does sperm live outside the body, can it be frozen or kept for x amount of time before having to transfer to your body?

[TTC5]

Just thinking about sperm levels/quality thats all if all 3 lots are from one day? Wonder if you can get say a sample few days before you plan to Ovulate and then a another sample day before or on day of O????

[ELP]

How long does sperm live outside the body, can it be frozen or kept for x amount of time before having to transfer to your body?I beleive that a sample can be kept alive until needed in a non spermacide condom if kept under your boob in your bra! I have only read about this so any other thoughts of extra info would be useful. I'm sure that some Ig ladies were going to attempt this as thier partners would be away at the ov date.

[Kris217]

Hey Kris!! I hope it works well next month for you and your partner :)
I do not know much about sperm donation but wanted to ask will he be giving you "samples/sperm" whatever you like to call it sorry if that came out offensive but ykwim.. in one day? How long does sperm live outside the body, can it be frozen or kept for x amount of time before having to transfer to your body?

Thank you :)
Well it will be fresh samples, he'll come to the hotel and do his deed and just hand us the sample. He'll then leave and we'll do our part.
I was wondering about the sperm levels too, i just thought even if it wasn't really high there would still be enough in there to get pregnant but i'm not sure how that works...
Maybe it would be better to do it even night, that way it has about 24 hours to build back up again. The sperm level isn't my main worry, it's catching the egg!
I'd hate to go down to Sydney, paying for accommodation etc and organising a babysitter then missing the egg and having to plan it again for the next month. It would be soooo much easier if i had a male partner living with me! lol

[Kris217]

I beleive that a sample can be kept alive until needed in a non spermacide condom if kept under your boob in your bra! I have only read about this so any other thoughts of extra info would be useful. I'm sure that some Ig ladies were going to attempt this as thier partners would be away at the ov date.

Yep i read that too but seeing he's coming to our hotel we don't need to worry about that. btw what does IG stand for?

[ELP]

IG is another site where many of us came over from In-Gender, its running really slow lately so we have migrated here :).

[nuthinbutpink]

I know for most IUIs done at a fertility clinic, they try to perfrom them when ovulation is imminent or just AFTER. Have you been charting your cycles? Can you pinpoint O? I think that is critical for how you are going to give this a go.

The good news is that lots of the swaying girls basically do this at home too when they attempt to sort sperm for a gender. So, you can get pregnant this way with good timing and proper handling of the sample. The sperm then needs to be kept body temp (in the arm pit) and in the dark until insertion.

It definitely might take several atttempts so I am glad you have that already in your plan. Anyway, good luck and I hope you catch that egg!

[atomic sagebrush]

Well next month i will be trying to get pregnant,(for a boy) i am in a same sex relationship and our donor is in Sydney so 2 hours from my house. We'll be staying near him as he works long hours and doesn't drive so asking him to come to us is a bit much.

Anyway, it's impossible to plan it this way. I have to wait to see if AF is on time then if my ovulation is on time too so it's going to be one of those day by day things which isn't useful when you need to book a hotel, arrange a babysitter and dog sitter!

So we were thinking of heading to Sydney the day i get my positive test to do an insemination that night. We are planning on doing it for about 3 nights...does this plan sound good? Or would night insemination then next morning then that night work better?

I know our situations are quite different but in the end it's still making a baby so your opinions and advise will be greatly appreciated!

Thanks,
KristyWow that's exciting news! KFX for you all!

I think your plan sounds just right, although I would be looking for the fade in (sometimes you get faint positives for a couple days before you get a really positive on an OPK) to make my plans. I think you're on the right track with the "night of, next morning, next night" plan, I'm afraid three days after an OPK will be too late and the egg will be dead or you run the risk of an O+12 timing.

If you can, try to convince him not to "relieve himself" for at least two days prior to your attempt to keep his sperm count high. It shouldn't be a problem to DTD three times in a row (can potentially lower sperm count) as long as he is not releasing frequently beforehand. For best numbers he should release every 3-4 days, no more and no less.

I would for sure take Robitussin around O http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?504-USING-ROBITUSSIN-TO-TTC-A-BOY and female O before every insemination if that is feasible. This is particularly true if you go with Clomid because that can make your mucus hostile and sways pink because of that. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1191-Clomid

If you cannot get Clomid, soy isoflavones may be used in place of Clomid and may help you to better pinpoint O. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1881-Super-Soy-for-a-girl-or-a-boy!

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you :)
Well it will be fresh samples, he'll come to the hotel and do his deed and just hand us the sample. He'll then leave and we'll do our part.
I was wondering about the sperm levels too, i just thought even if it wasn't really high there would still be enough in there to get pregnant but i'm not sure how that works...
Maybe it would be better to do it even night, that way it has about 24 hours to build back up again. The sperm level isn't my main worry, it's catching the egg!
I'd hate to go down to Sydney, paying for accommodation etc and organising a babysitter then missing the egg and having to plan it again for the next month. It would be soooo much easier if i had a male partner living with me! lol

I agree, I think that catching the egg is much more important for you guys than worrying too much over sperm count. As long as he is not "helping himself" every day before you guys arrive, his count should be ok for what you have in mind. Make sure he gives it a rest for 3 or 4 days prior to your arrival.

[Kris217]

I agree, I think that catching the egg is much more important for you guys than worrying too much over sperm count. As long as he is not "helping himself" every day before you guys arrive, his count should be ok for what you have in mind. Make sure he gives it a rest for 3 or 4 days prior to your arrival.

Ok i will ask him to do that for me, he has said let him know of anything he needs to do to help out so this shouldn't be a problem.
My ovulation is usually pretty regular but i've got 2 different types of test and one says yes one says no.....so confusing when that happens!!!
I will do as suggested and start tracking early, once i see the faint lines i will know to get the ball rolling.

Thanks everyone for your advice!

[Kris217]

Wow that's exciting news! KFX for you all!

I think your plan sounds just right, although I would be looking for the fade in (sometimes you get faint positives for a couple days before you get a really positive on an OPK) to make my plans. I think you're on the right track with the "night of, next morning, next night" plan, I'm afraid three days after an OPK will be too late and the egg will be dead or you run the risk of an O+12 timing.

If you can, try to convince him not to "relieve himself" for at least two days prior to your attempt to keep his sperm count high. It shouldn't be a problem to DTD three times in a row (can potentially lower sperm count) as long as he is not releasing frequently beforehand. For best numbers he should release every 3-4 days, no more and no less.

I would for sure take Robitussin around O http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?504-USING-ROBITUSSIN-TO-TTC-A-BOY and female O before every insemination if that is feasible. This is particularly true if you go with Clomid because that can make your mucus hostile and sways pink because of that. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1191-Clomid

If you cannot get Clomid, soy isoflavones may be used in place of Clomid and may help you to better pinpoint O. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1881-Super-Soy-for-a-girl-or-a-boy!


Ok so night morning night, i will have to see if he can make a visit before work...well if it's during the week. I won't be taking Clomid yet, if i don't get pregnant after a few months then i might try it.

[Kris217]

I'm planning on emailing my donor and requesting a few things. I don't want to force anything onto him but he has offered to do anything i need and he'd also like a boy so i thought i'd ask you ladies what things i can ask of him that will help the situation. Nothing too complicated, just little things that might help.
So if you can add your thoughts that will be great!

Thanks,
Kristy

[TTC5]

I think that sounds like a great plan! Best to get it all aired out before attempt! He sounds lovely, is he going to have a part of the babys life too?

[Kris217]

I think that sounds like a great plan! Best to get it all aired out before attempt! He sounds lovely, is he going to have a part of the babys life too?

Yep he'll be apart of the baby's life, i don't think it would work very well if i cut him out and the child was constantly asking me who he is and i tell them i didn't know.
He is a lovely guy, very sweet and a great role model so we're happy with him.
I think i've read no tight underwear for the man and to not ejaculate for about 3 days before.....is that correct?

[TTC5]

That is so wonderful this baby is going to be so well loved!!!

Does he have any other children?

[Kris217]

That is so wonderful this baby is going to be so well loved!!!

Does he have any other children?

Nope, will be his first baby too. He is a gay man so he doesn't have that many options to be a parent. Being gay doesn't mean you don't have the same desire for children which can be frustrating. So all in all, he'll be helping us out and we'll be helping him :)

[atomic sagebrush]

This may help http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1171-How-to-raise-sperm-count-and-sway-blue!!&highlight=boosting+sperm+count All the little tidbits on boosting sperm numbers in one place.

[TTC5]

I'm so happy for you guys!

[Kris217]

This may help http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1171-How-to-raise-sperm-count-and-sway-blue!!&highlight=boosting+sperm+count All the little tidbits on boosting sperm numbers in one place.

Thanks Atomic!

[Kris217]

Well i'm expecting to ovulate on monday or tuesday, my donor said he doesn't have enough "stock" to do an insemination night, morning, night so we'll be doing once a day for 3 days. I hope everything i've been doing with diet etc will pay off. If not a daughter will be fine, a baby is a baby and either gender will be amazing!

[atomic sagebrush]

That's great Kris! I'm so excited for you guys!!! Once a day for 3 days is great too! Sending you all my blue dust!!

[TTC5]

How is it all going hun?!!

[Kris217]

Im a few mins from doing the second and last insemination. All along he said he could do 3 over 3 nights but now he is saying he won't have enough 'stock" and only wanted to do it last night then thursday. i told him that will be too late, if he couldn't do it tonight then we'd just go home. It's a big trip for us, a lot of planning and expenses and he just doesn't seem to be taking that seriously. It's not like we can try whenever we want, it's taken a lot of planning and tracking everything to get to this point.

He's also pushing me to have down syndrome testing if i get pregnant, he said his doctor recommended it due to my age.....im 30.
If it doesn't take this month with him i'm not sure i will continue to try with him, something doesn't seem right....

[gizmo77]

Im a few mins from doing the second and last insemination. All along he said he could do 3 over 3 nights but now he is saying he won't have enough 'stock" and only wanted to do it last night then thursday. i told him that will be too late, if he couldn't do it tonight then we'd just go home. It's a big trip for us, a lot of planning and expenses and he just doesn't seem to be taking that seriously. It's not like we can try whenever we want, it's taken a lot of planning and tracking everything to get to this point.

He's also pushing me to have down syndrome testing if i get pregnant, he said his doctor recommended it due to my age.....im 30.
If it doesn't take this month with him i'm not sure i will continue to try with him, something doesn't seem right....



just curious and of ftopic, is the donor planning on being involved in the baby's life?
as far as down syndrome, in my particular situation every pregnancy ive had (the older you get) the "possibility" to have a child with D.S. gets higher. i guess all dr's are diff, but my doc said chances of having a kid with D.S. are high only if you have it in yoru genes. ppl these days start having kids in their 40s and their babies come out fine. who knows where it really comes from. its all statistical tho. and youre pretty young if you ask me!! at my dr's place she said in 20 yrs they only seen one child with D.S. born to a 25 yr old woman.
i had tests done for both pg and the 2nd was higher percentage so i freakd out cried for days (both times cried), then they do an U/S and show that the bones are forming fine. the only clear cut way is to have an amnio. neither of my girls do not have D.S.
yeah i agree something doesntseem right with this guy, but you never know. somethings not right with my husband either!
hahahaha jk
:-D
..but good luck anyway!

[Kris217]

lol yeah maybe it's just a male thing :P
Yes the donor will be involved in the child's life, i don't think it would be fair to the child to deny them that so he will have visitation rights and phone calls and those type of things. he just seems to be getting too personal, he even emailed me today asking where my dr was, if it was local enough and if i'd be getting regular check ups.
Duh, of course i will be! He was even asking my partner the same questions and she's so close to telling him to back off. He was questioning our eating habits, asking how often we eat junk food etc and if we'd give the baby junk food.....another duh!

Anyway, about the DS. Of course no parent wishes their child would have it so i will be going to my regular ultrasounds and any other testing my dr recommends. I think he is paranoid about it. I just don't know what to do about it, i mean would it be a good idea to continue with him seeing he's been like this so early on.....he could get worse and bossy once the child is born...

[atomic sagebrush]

Im a few mins from doing the second and last insemination. All along he said he could do 3 over 3 nights but now he is saying he won't have enough 'stock" and only wanted to do it last night then thursday. i told him that will be too late, if he couldn't do it tonight then we'd just go home. It's a big trip for us, a lot of planning and expenses and he just doesn't seem to be taking that seriously. It's not like we can try whenever we want, it's taken a lot of planning and tracking everything to get to this point.

He's also pushing me to have down syndrome testing if i get pregnant, he said his doctor recommended it due to my age.....im 30.
If it doesn't take this month with him i'm not sure i will continue to try with him, something doesn't seem right....

OMG that is CRAZY (about the Down's Testing.) I would NOT have it done. Honestly I kinda don't believe him to be quite honest because that doesn't seem like the sort of thing a guy would discuss with a doctor. My doctors (two different doctors mind you) advised me against having it and I was 36 and 38 years old at the time...there are tons of false positives and you end up having to have unnecessary amniocentesis done in many cases, which has risks of miscarriage. At 30 your odds of miscarriage from amnio will be far higher than your risks of having a baby with a chromosomal defect!!!

I am getting an "off" feeling too and I think you may be doing the right thing not continuing to try with him.

I am so thankful that you guys were able to do the second insemination at least, I think it will up your odds of success. Praying that it takes!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

lol yeah maybe it's just a male thing :P
Yes the donor will be involved in the child's life, i don't think it would be fair to the child to deny them that so he will have visitation rights and phone calls and those type of things. he just seems to be getting too personal, he even emailed me today asking where my dr was, if it was local enough and if i'd be getting regular check ups.
Duh, of course i will be! He was even asking my partner the same questions and she's so close to telling him to back off. He was questioning our eating habits, asking how often we eat junk food etc and if we'd give the baby junk food.....another duh!

Anyway, about the DS. Of course no parent wishes their child would have it so i will be going to my regular ultrasounds and any other testing my dr recommends. I think he is paranoid about it. I just don't know what to do about it, i mean would it be a good idea to continue with him seeing he's been like this so early on.....he could get worse and bossy once the child is born...

The way it almost comes off to me is that he is suddenly afraid of being "saddled" with a child that has disabilities or something...maybe he just realized that it could possibly happen now that it has become a reality? I hope he quiets down about it now.

[purplepoet20]

The guys comments sound fishy.... I would stay away from him. If the guy is going to be just a donor then nothing is his business, except filling the cup. As the one carrying, birthing, and raising a child it is your choice as to what you do. I hope you do get preg but from a better guy... You are the 1st same sex couple I have seen on here and it is exciting to see the outcome.

My hubby and I have been talking about doing egg and sperm donations after we are done having kids. How did you find the guy? Was it easy or did it take a long time?

[gizmo77]

The way it almost comes off to me is that he is suddenly afraid of being "saddled" with a child that has disabilities or something...maybe he just realized that it could possibly happen now that it has become a reality? I hope he quiets down about it now.

i wonder if someone else is 'whispering' in his ears. does the guy himself (do you know) plan to have his own children to raise himself, get married, have his own family, etc.

[gizmo77]

lol yeah maybe it's just a male thing :P
Yes the donor will be involved in the child's life, i don't think it would be fair to the child to deny them that so he will have visitation rights and phone calls and those type of things. he just seems to be getting too personal, he even emailed me today asking where my dr was, if it was local enough and if i'd be getting regular check ups.
Duh, of course i will be! He was even asking my partner the same questions and she's so close to telling him to back off. He was questioning our eating habits, asking how often we eat junk food etc and if we'd give the baby junk food.....another duh!

Anyway, about the DS. Of course no parent wishes their child would have it so i will be going to my regular ultrasounds and any other testing my dr recommends. I think he is paranoid about it. I just don't know what to do about it, i mean would it be a good idea to continue with him seeing he's been like this so early on.....he could get worse and bossy once the child is born...

i guess i could see a potential father if he is to be involved asking all sorts of nervous questions..but its like why now? youve already gievn the sample!! guess he didnt think it out and was more interested in the money, perhaps (if thats your situation).
regardless, you and your partner are the primary parents if it takes this month (good luck!!). if you do end up with his, i wold write out a contract of some sort, that you and your partner draw up and negotiate from there. let us know if you get pg!!! im excited about this too ;-)

[TTC5]

MMMMM he sounds very worried... sounds like he wants to very involved in this too... I would probably sit down with him and tell him how this makes you are your partner feel and see how he responds..??

[Foxy]

I hope everything works out for you!

[Kris217]

OMG that is CRAZY (about the Down's Testing.) I would NOT have it done. Honestly I kinda don't believe him to be quite honest because that doesn't seem like the sort of thing a guy would discuss with a doctor. My doctors (two different doctors mind you) advised me against having it and I was 36 and 38 years old at the time...there are tons of false positives and you end up having to have unnecessary amniocentesis done in many cases, which has risks of miscarriage. At 30 your odds of miscarriage from amnio will be far higher than your risks of having a baby with a chromosomal defect!!!

I am getting an "off" feeling too and I think you may be doing the right thing not continuing to try with him.

I am so thankful that you guys were able to do the second insemination at least, I think it will up your odds of success. Praying that it takes!!!

Thanks Atomic, i definitely don't want to risk miscarriage on a test that isn't really needed. I don't think at 30 i need that.
If he doesn't want a child with a disability then he shouldn't be a donor, so i'm guessing he'd want me to abort the baby if it did have a disability.....again that's not his decision!
If i hear from him again and he's on about the same stuff i will get firm with him and just say look, you're over stepping the boundary and if we want your input we'll ask you.

[Kris217]

i wonder if someone else is 'whispering' in his ears. does the guy himself (do you know) plan to have his own children to raise himself, get married, have his own family, etc.

He is a gay man so this is probably the best option for him to have a child with some type of involvement unless he goes the surrogate route which i doubt. He has made plenty of donations to IVF Australia and he can't pick and choose who gets them. If they choose him and pay the money then that's it. He has no involvement and won't even know about it until 18 years down the track so i think i'm being fair by letting him see the child but he's taking it a bit too far.

[Kris217]

i guess i could see a potential father if he is to be involved asking all sorts of nervous questions..but its like why now? youve already gievn the sample!! guess he didnt think it out and was more interested in the money, perhaps (if thats your situation).
regardless, you and your partner are the primary parents if it takes this month (good luck!!). if you do end up with his, i wold write out a contract of some sort, that you and your partner draw up and negotiate from there. let us know if you get pg!!! im excited about this too ;-)

Exactly, i was fine with him asking questions cos i would too if i was doing the same thing. He is just asking questions which aren't really his business. We do have a donor agreement typed out, just gotta print it out and have him sign it.
These contracts aren't legally binding but if he ever takes me to court it will show his intent from the beginning.

[Kris217]

MMMMM he sounds very worried... sounds like he wants to very involved in this too... I would probably sit down with him and tell him how this makes you are your partner feel and see how he responds..??

I think that will be the next step, he just asked me to add him on msn so we can chat but if he starts that will be the end of that lol

[Kris217]

The guys comments sound fishy.... I would stay away from him. If the guy is going to be just a donor then nothing is his business, except filling the cup. As the one carrying, birthing, and raising a child it is your choice as to what you do. I hope you do get preg but from a better guy... You are the 1st same sex couple I have seen on here and it is exciting to see the outcome.

My hubby and I have been talking about doing egg and sperm donations after we are done having kids. How did you find the guy? Was it easy or did it take a long time?

I'm hoping im pregnant just because we went through so much this month with paying for accommodation, getting my sister to take care of my kids (niece and nephews i have custody of) and taking care of our pets. But at the same time if i'm not pregnant that might be a good thing too. Whatever is meant to happen will and i will just go from there, if i do look for another donor i will make sure not to go down this path again.

As for where i found him, there is a website called free sperm donations worldwide and it has thousands of people on it. Not just sperm donors but people looking for sperm donors, egg donors, surrogates etc and there are people from all over the world. It's very easy to use, just gotta weed out the duds as i ran into a few of those but there are some nice people on there. I think if you and your hubby do donate someday you'll be helping people in a very special and rewarding way :)

[atomic sagebrush]

I hope all has settled down and that you are already incubating a lil bean! GL!!!

[Kris217]

I hope all has settled down and that you are already incubating a lil bean! GL!!!

thanks Atomic, i did the first insemination 5 days ago and i've been crampy the last few days. Like light period pain, dunno if that's just from the insemination and or using the instead cup.
BTW do you know if those early pregnancy tests can be used as early as they say? I think the site i bought them off is early-pregnancy-tests.com

[TTC5]

FX!!!!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

You can def. test early but just be aware that it could be a false neg. at that point! OMG I am so excited!

[Kris217]

I will leave it to some time next week to test, it's tempting to try early but i don't want a false negative. This morning feels like the first day of my period, a lot of cramping which is unusual for me at this stage of my cycle.

Thanks girls!

[Chunksta]

FX Kris!!!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Agh the cramping is the MAJOR early sign!!! OMG!!!!

I totally agree about not testing early, I always waited until I missed AF with all the 4 boys so I never had a neg. test. Then the month I had a pg scare, I tested superearly I was shocked at how sad I was when I got the negatives (all five of them LOL!!)

[TTC5]

Eeeeee!!!! Exciting Kris!!

[Kris217]

Yeah trying not to get too excited, i'm still having cramps. Not as bad as yesterday or the day before and when i squat down to pick something up i get a pain in my belly so i'm not sure what that is about. I will try to hold off testing til Thursday....see how good my willpower is lol.

[TTC5]

You have better self control than me :P

[Kris217]

lol yeah i bet, i'm kinda scared to test....i'm curious but i'll feel bad if it didn't work. Although i know i shouldn't expect it to work first time, these things can take months but yeah it will be a big let down.

[TTC5]

Totally understandable x

[gizmo77]

lol yeah i bet, i'm kinda scared to test....i'm curious but i'll feel bad if it didn't work. Although i know i shouldn't expect it to work first time, these things can take months but yeah it will be a big let down.

crossing fngers for you!!!

[Kris217]

Thank you!
I'm either 8 or 9DPO so testing is really tempting to me now! Maybe i could try it tomorrow morning but i pee all night so i'm not sure what is considered FMU for me. I pee less during the day so maybe i could test in the afternoon as i won't have gone for maybe 4 hours so more than during the night?

[TTC5]

Don't forget you drink during the day which can dilute the urine ;)

[Kris217]

Don't forget you drink during the day which can dilute the urine ;)

yeah i know, i just don't know what to do. When i test for ovulation i don't drink much during the day and my tests are always good so i was thinking i could do the same thing. Wouldn't constant urination during the night dilute it too, might make it hard to pick up the hcg hormone in the morning?
I guess tonight i could try not to drink anything after dinner and see if that helps, and if i don't pee much during the night i will take a pg test in the morning.

[TTC5]

Maybe test of a day but try to hold it a little longer? X

[Kris217]

I'm better at holding off during the day, like if i'm out shopping i won't go for hours. Today though i've been feeling like i'm busting but not much comes out.

[atomic sagebrush]

That can be a good sign!! Crossing everything for you!!

[TTC5]

How is it all going Kris? x

[Kris217]

Thanks Atomic!
TTC5- If i sleep through tonight i will be doing a pg test in the morning, if i'm up often to pee i will wait til later in the day. AF is due Tuesday so if it's negative i'm definitely not pregnant!!

[Kris217]

Ok i'm definitely not pregnant :( i know these things rarely happen first try but still it's really disappointing. It makes it hard when the person you need to help you create this baby doesn't live in the same house as you, so much extra planning is involved and that is why i'm so disappointed this morning.
Oh well, this might happen again and again so i better get used to it!!

Thanks for everyone's support and advice, it's been great. Hope you all enjoyed your Easter!

[TTC5]

FX!!!!!!

[TTC5]

Thanks Atomic!
TTC5- If i sleep through tonight i will be doing a pg test in the morning, if i'm up often to pee i will wait til later in the day. AF is due Tuesday so if it's negative i'm definitely not pregnant!!

Not neccessarily Kris, lots of women don't get a + until AFTER AF xxxxx

Don't give up hope just yet!! xx

[Kris217]

My sister said that also, i was saying on FB that my sisters friend from work and her sister both got positive tests after AF was due and they both had baby boys but somehow i don't think that will happen for me.....

[TTC5]

You never know!!! xxxx

[ELP]

Kris, how many dpo are you? And what strength are your tests? You are definately not out yet, there could well be a second line in the morning yet:)

[gizmo77]

My sister said that also, i was saying on FB that my sisters friend from work and her sister both got positive tests after AF was due and they both had baby boys but somehow i don't think that will happen for me.....

there will plenty more opportunities! hope the test IS wrong but otherwise good luck for the next try!!

[Kris217]

I'm around 15DPO, i've used a few tests and they were all negative. AF is due today but i don't feel it coming on like usual.
It will probably come late to play a mean trick on me!
I think the strength of the tests are 20? I'm not sure if that's the pg tests or the O tests though. Either way i'm just going to wait and see what happens.

[TTC5]

FX!!

[Kris217]

Ok ladies i'm out, just got my period. I'm curious to know why i've been so crampy ever since my inseminations. I never get that way usually, maybe it's just a reaction to the sperm or the instead cup or something. I don't even know if i'll be trying again this month. I contacted my donor letting him know i wasn't pregnant and asked if he was keen to give it another try and i haven't heard from him and that was 2 days ago. I said if he was going to help i needed to go over a few things with him first so maybe that scared him off!

[TTC5]

Oh bummer, so sorry Kris =(

[Kris217]

Oh well, maybe it was meant to be. My donor hasn't responded to my 2 emails so I've began looking for another. I've found a guy who seems nice, lets see how it turns out! lol
It's just so hard to do it this way, we can either do IVF through a clinic and use one of their donors or do it at home ourselves but both of them have advantages and disadvantages. I'd like my child to know the donor but i don't want a donor getting too clucky and taking me to court for access or butting in on how we are raising the child! One guy sent us a list of things he wanted. He started out saying emailed photos would be fine and seeing it a few times a year then it turned into from 0 to 2 he will visit us here at our house then from 2 to 5 it will sleep at his house once a week then from 5 to 8 2 nights a week and so on. So we said no to him and he got all offended, oh well. We barely know the guy, we wanted to form a friendship before we signed over our child into his care if you know what i mean. *Sigh*

[TTC5]

What about having some kind of councelling to help you guys decide which path is best for you guys? xx

[Kris217]

Well we have an IVF appointment on Tuesday and it's mandatory that we have counselling. I don't want to do IVF but my partner might if she can't find a donor. At the appointment i will ask about our options cos they've worked with many same sex couples so might have some insight into it.....if only they'd let me adopt! That's been my dream since i was a teenager. I just didn't know that once i was ready for that someday that the govermnent wouldn't let me!!

[TTC5]

Yes it is very discriminitive isn't it? =(

You may be pleasantly suprised with the ivf clinic, who knows?! FX!!

[Kris217]

yeah it's crazy, those government officials need to get their butts into these orphanages to see the need. I've done that and it's heartbreaking!
I actually heard from my donor today, he said he was really sorry for all his questions. said he has a problem with worrying and he was trying to fix that as he doesn't want to cause any problems so maybe my email got through to him and he'll be easier to work with. He did say he can't donate everyday over my ovulation though, it will have to be every second day so i guess i'll have to go with that and see if it works. I think i'll do one the day i get a + then 2 days later or should i do the day before a + then 2 days later?

[TTC5]

How many days of +'s do you usually have?

[Kris217]

Umm i don't think i've ever tested that long, last month i had 2 really + tests but i didn't test after that as i wasn't doing another insemination. I wouldn't say i had more than 2 or 3 but i really don't know....I will track that this month in case it doesn't work again and we'll know for next time.

[TTC5]

Just trying to figure it out for you to avoid 0+12..

[Kris217]

This month i think i will be taking clomid, i haven't had any blood work done so i don't even know if i release eggs or not. So if i'm not the clomid could help and i don't want to be going to Sydney every month for months on end as it's extra money that could be going into the baby's bank account. This way i believe i am increasing my odds....even if it's just a little.

[TTC5]

It must be super stressful for you trying to plan and organise and afford everything! I really hope you get a bfp asap! x

[Kris217]

Thank you!
Yeah it isn't the easiest thing in the world but the baby will be worth it so i'm willing to go through anything!

[atomic sagebrush]

yeah it's crazy, those government officials need to get their butts into these orphanages to see the need. I've done that and it's heartbreaking!
I actually heard from my donor today, he said he was really sorry for all his questions. said he has a problem with worrying and he was trying to fix that as he doesn't want to cause any problems so maybe my email got through to him and he'll be easier to work with. He did say he can't donate everyday over my ovulation though, it will have to be every second day so i guess i'll have to go with that and see if it works. I think i'll do one the day i get a + then 2 days later or should i do the day before a + then 2 days later?

I completely agree about the adoption issue, it is ridiculous that in the year 2011 this is still an issue. >:(

I would do day before + and day after pos.

[atomic sagebrush]

I think the Clomid is a great idea esp with his demands on the day off between insemination. That way if you should happen to release 2 eggs several hours apart, your odds are that much better of catching at least one.

Clarification - Without the Clomid, I think 2 days after pos would mean you prob. won't even catch the egg, let alone worrying about O+12.