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cherubrock
November 20th, 2012, 08:26 AM
I just read this


Mother pregnant with boy twins in Dublin jumps to her death from a cliff because she wanted a girl | Mail Online (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2235714/Mother-pregnant-boy-twins-Dublin-jumps-death-cliff-wanted-girl.html)

homebirthing princess
November 20th, 2012, 08:36 AM
That is so so sad :(

Flowerfairy
November 20th, 2012, 09:22 AM
Oh my, a very sad story.

fish2012
November 20th, 2012, 02:39 PM
Oh gosh that's so sad,

Thank you to nuthingbutpink and atomic and everyone else who give us this space to talk and get support xx

BellaVita
November 20th, 2012, 04:48 PM
This made me shudder. How awful.

Lotte
November 20th, 2012, 04:58 PM
:tissue:

lisvna
November 20th, 2012, 05:22 PM
Oh my god! Did we know her perhaps from this forum? She wanted to do genderselection ......

ThreeMenAndALAdy
November 20th, 2012, 05:31 PM
The despair this woman must've felt breaks my heart. So many lives lost. And her sons that are still here with no mother, and her husband. I can't imagine. It makes me so angry that gd can get so bad that a woman would do this. I hate gd so much!!! I'm grateful that mine was only a few days of tears. And the support of the ladies that are on this site is priceless. I wish she had an outlet like this.

cherubrock
November 21st, 2012, 11:54 AM
Oh my god! Did we know her perhaps from this forum? She wanted to do genderselection ......

I did wonder that, you just never know..

rachel
November 21st, 2012, 12:23 PM
too sad

Regrow
November 21st, 2012, 09:54 PM
Absolutely heartbreaking, when are people going to release that Gender Disappointment is a real condition people suffer from!!! Most people would just sweep it under the carpet and tell us to stop being silly and get on with life. Makes me so angry we are not given a choice to do gender selection in our own countries :(

Jadis
November 22nd, 2012, 08:40 AM
This is so tragic, my heart breaks for her and her family. I hope she's in peace.

Everyonehasgirls
November 27th, 2012, 11:28 AM
Absolutely heartbreaking, when are people going to release that Gender Disappointment is a real condition people suffer from!!! Most people would just sweep it under the carpet and tell us to stop being silly and get on with life. Makes me so angry we are not given a choice to do gender selection in our own countries :(

Totally agree this subject just feels so taboo can't talk about it to anyone not even my husband haven't even mustered up the courage to vent my true feelings on here

luckylass
November 27th, 2012, 11:36 AM
Absolutely heartbreaking, when are people going to release that Gender Disappointment is a real condition people suffer from!!! Most people would just sweep it under the carpet and tell us to stop being silly and get on with life. Makes me so angry we are not given a choice to do gender selection in our own countries :(

Very true. I was very fortunate to find out we are having a girl 4 weeks ago but being Irish like this woman I can tell you that generally it is not an accepted topic of conversation and I would not have dreamed of talking to people about my desire to have a girl before I found out. I know we all want to have healthy children first and foremost but for people who are suffering from gender disappointment it is awful to think there is nowhere for them to turn and talk about it. Don't know all of the in's and out's of this poor lady's life but it is sad to think it went this far. My heart breaks for her family.

Yuzu
November 28th, 2012, 09:02 PM
So sad. It's really terrible that GD is such a taboo subject, especially for women. People are usually a good deal more accepting when men say, "Oh, I want a son." They may roll their eyes, but it's usually assumed that men want sons. If women express a gender preference it seems that someone is going to give them a guilt trip about it. "You should be happy for what you get," or "Just be thankful the baby is healthy." Of course, we want healthy babies, but GD is a real thing.

I feel so badly for the poor woman. I hope she is at peace.

4devochki
November 29th, 2012, 03:11 AM
It's terrible to think that if people were more accepting, forgiving and compassionate, and allowed women to discuss what is in their hearts, these three lives could have been spared. For our Irish members, is there any discussion of this in your country? Any effort to get GD out in the open and say to women (and men) it's OK?

ladymclemore
December 18th, 2012, 01:02 AM
ugh that makes me so sick...so many lives were affected by this! Her two babies which were almost full term were killed, she was killed, her husband lost his wife, her parents lost their daughter, and her two sons lost their mother! I really wish she would have indicated to someone what she was really feeling! so sad....

Violet
December 19th, 2012, 09:58 PM
so sad :(

queen-bee
December 22nd, 2012, 04:26 AM
Very true. I was very fortunate to find out we are having a girl 4 weeks ago but being Irish like this woman I can tell you that generally it is not an accepted topic of conversation and I would not have dreamed of talking to people about my desire to have a girl before I found out. I know we all want to have healthy children first and foremost but for people who are suffering from gender disappointment it is awful to think there is nowhere for them to turn and talk about it. Don't know all of the in's and out's of this poor lady's life but it is sad to think it went this far. My heart breaks for her family.
Exactly. None of my friends knows I suffered from GD, none of them knows the real reason why I went to the US 3 times this year. This is such huge part of my life, but I can't share it with anyone except DH as people would think I am crazy, or selfish. Even those close to me.

What a sad story. It brought back the memories of how I used to cover up my sadness in front of all these people (friends, relatives, nurses) after I learned I was having my third son.

Gini_3boys
January 15th, 2013, 09:17 PM
So sad :(

iluvmy4sons
January 16th, 2013, 01:01 AM
So sad :(

Girlsway
January 17th, 2013, 09:28 AM
She suffered from depression since her 20s. She would possibly end her life for a different reason later in her life if she had a girl. I wouldn't connect it to GD, she had a condition and the trigger could have been anything else in the future. It was possibly just a question of time.

LilithWiser1979
January 20th, 2013, 11:50 PM
She suffered from depression since her 20s. She would possibly end her life for a different reason later in her life if she had a girl. I wouldn't connect it to GD, she had a condition and the trigger could have been anything else in the future. It was possibly just a question of time.

I disagree. Just because someone has had a history of depression doesn't mean that extreme gender disappointment combined with pregnancy hormones wasn't the thing that pushed her over the edge. This woman WAS seeking treatment, and I think statements like this minimize the despair that some women feel when they find out they're having #2, 3, 4, 5 or whatever of the same gender. Everyone's GD is different, and clearly hers was blacker than mine's ever been.

esoteric
January 25th, 2013, 06:43 PM
This is absolutely heartbreaking. I was actually wondering how many women have committed suicide due to GD by not having support or being laughed at.

I still suffer greatly from GD. I am actually at a point where I am blaming my body not the child.

Anyways... What I really wish for is that GD should come out of the closet so to speak. It should not be laughed at, I have had the worst responses from women that have one of each & they huff & blow it off as if to say it is a made up thing.

My take on it is, Yes I agree it is unfortuante soem women cannot conceive and therefore any child is wonderful. However if that same woman was able to conveive naturally what would she do after haveing 2 or more of the same? If a woman was capable of having children and if it brings steadiness, balance, harmony, happiness and lessen the chances of depression for herself and her overall family well being than why can't we have the ability to have high tech methods available to everyone that say has 2 or more of one gender. I think it may be pushing it after 1 child, but 2 of the same, considering economic situations and an ageing child bearing age I think for a 3rd child women should be given that option.
Why should it be frowned upon and why is it only limited to those that have oodles of cash in the US and for other parts of the world to do with a genetic probability of deformity. only then can they have it available. We want to lower the cases of mental illness, this is one place to start. Accept GD as an actual illness and the solution is provide high tech option.

I believe a HAPPY MUMMY = HAPPY FAMILY
More mental support and high tech should & must be available to hopefully avoid incidences as the poor lady in Dublin witht he twins. So sad.

Sorry if I repeated myself!

I am lucky I have free counselling in Canada, but this lady probably didn't.

aidansmum
February 20th, 2013, 11:02 PM
That's so, so sad! GD should be offered in fertility clinics...period! Why risk making someone that miserable and depressed? I feel sorry for her, but also angry. In her disease she left her sons and killed her two unborn boys. If one can't cope with not having the desired gender, they should not do it! Shocking! :(

purple giraffe
April 11th, 2013, 04:57 PM
It is incredibly sad, I remember reading this and thinking she must have felt so desperate and lost at what to do. It is so hard and only wish we could choose the gender of our children (without the huge costs currently involved and the fact it's illegal still in the uk)

Jenht
April 12th, 2013, 08:22 PM
That is so sad. Her poor family

Haking
April 16th, 2013, 07:16 PM
So sad! It is horrible to think that GD is so hard sometimes. Sad to think that she left behind her boys and husband...

Kiara
April 16th, 2013, 07:31 PM
I feel sorry for everyone involved but mostly for her children . Imagine how they will feel when they find out that their mom didnt want to live because they were the wrong gender:( (ofcourse its not their fault at all, she had a big depression but I think that they will think about it at some point)

HopefulMonster
May 10th, 2013, 11:14 AM
I have to be honest, I find it totally hideous that here in the UK it is completely illegal to gender select, BUT I could get pregnant, have a free scan that tells me the gender, then a free abortion as long as it was before 24 weeks - all completely legal!

People are allowed on the NHS (so for free) to change their gender if they think they are men not women or visa versa, can have boob jobs if they have low self esteem from small boobs, have liposuction if they eat too much and get fat, etc etc. Yet apparently being able to choose the gender of your baby is wrong and immoral, but it's fine to choose to kill your unborn baby if you "don't feel it's the right time" or for any number of other ridiculous reasons.

The worst part is that with gender desire/disappointment is that EVERYONE beats down on you when you are already feeling vulnerable, and guilty. You are told you are the worst possible mother for caring about gender when ALL you should care about it their health. Most women don't dare admit to anyone how they feel. I'm really saddened by this poor woman and her poor family, but at the same time I am not surprised.

HopefulMonster
May 10th, 2013, 11:18 AM
Did the babies survive???? I can't find the info anywhere, I'm starting to think the babies actually died with her, which is horrific :(

Kiara
May 10th, 2013, 12:42 PM
Did the babies survive???? I can't find the info anywhere, I'm starting to think the babies actually died with her, which is horrific :(

Sadly I dont think there is any way they babies could have survived that:(