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Serendipity
December 18th, 2012, 12:24 PM
I'm still really struggling most days with GD, over two years since I found out my second pregnancy was a boy. The nearest thing I can compare it to is grief, but I was reading that even after a bereavement you should be feeling like you are starting to heal after 18 months, which makes me think I should be starting to think about seeking help to move on from my feelings of loss, anger, bitterness and unfairness. I have found a local hypnotherapist who also offers cbt, but I was wondering if anyone else has gone down this route and if therapy helped you? I'm getting desperate- i thought I would feel better after all this time passing.

rainbowflower
December 18th, 2012, 02:19 PM
I definitely think that's worth a try. If your reasons are down to some experience or expectation then I think that could help.

I read a book I found on Amazon about gender disappointment and managed to make some "peace" after that. I also use some CBT techniques such as focussing on positives when I find myself feeling any envy/longing - i.e. finding each reason I would like a girl and seeing if I can get something like that with my boys OR if having a girl would guarantee that (which it usually doesn't). Being mother of the bride - daughter might never want to marry. Maternal grandmother and helping a daughter with pregnancy/motherhood - she might not want children. Mother-daughter bond - no guarantees we'd have much in common either personality-wise or interest-wise and could have stronger bond with one of my boys. Shared interests- my DS1 is only 2 but already likes doing baking with me, and interested in photography same as me. As the quote goes, I feel I can achieve a lot of my reasons for wanting a girl in how I parent and raise my boys.