Need a little cry !!! GD rearing its head

[Mum23boys]

Well I already have 2 friends pregnant - 1 wirh 2 sons pregnant with a girl due in march - 1 friend with 1 boy due a girl in april and today a friend who also has 1 boy had her gender scan and is having a girl - My sister has 1 boy 1 girl and here i am ..... still no daughter and I feel like its just so unfair that these people get exactly what they want and its more upsetting as we are all due within 8 weeks each other and there will be 3 girls and probably my 4th boy ...... I just dont know that I can genuinly feel happy for them - i just feel jealous when i hear them all talking about going "girly" shopping together.... i feel like Im so left out when we used to be so close. I just feel like crying and really dont want to feel this way - i want to just be happy

[rainbowflower]

I know how you feel... when we found out I was expecting DS2 (after swaying pink) I met up with a group of other local mums and all of them were either expecting their first baby, a girl, or already had a girl and were expecting another!

for all you know you might have a little girl in there too
but if not a little boy would be so special as he would be the novelty in that group

[heidih1977]

Hi mum23boys,

I know exactly how you feel. I just found out yesterday a close friend who is due 3 weeks before me is getting her girl (she has one son so far). Another friend will have her scan in 2 weeks and I am sure she will hear girl too- she is totally convinced of it. Then there is me...scan in 3 weeks and I will hear boy number 3. I can't ever remember being this unhappy before in my life. I have spent the last 1.5 years thinking and planning this sway and now hitting my 19th pregnancy week and have spent the majority of that unhappy and stressing about GD. I honestly don't know what to do with myself or how I will possibly cope in summer when we all have our babies and they sit there with their bouncing baby girls and I am there with another boy. I actually barely recognize myself these days with the constant bad moods and snappiness and a latent sadness knowing I will most likely hear boy in a few weeks. I never ever dream or imagine having a daughter or buying girly things....the thought seems so utterly distant and foreign to me. I dare not let myself even raise a shred of optimism! I am absolutely jealous of women with both sexes that get pregnant a third time and are so easy going and don't even give gender a second thought. This pregnancy has been a total opposite in nearly every way from the other two but I still reckon I am one of those that experiences totally different pregnancies but all the same gender. I really don't have any advice for you. All I can do is 100% empathize and hope from the bottom of my heart that we get our girls and finally manage to be happy for once and for all.

[Bigwish]

O, dear mum23boys, i'm so hoping you'll have your little girl in there!

My dearest friends have ALL boys... Only my sil has GBG. I'm scared to face the time that friends start having their girls and i'm not

[black&gold]

I know how you feel, I felt a little upset with my second boy (was devastated with my first!). I also have a few friends that are currently pregnant and all are having girls - so naturally my mind assumes that if I ever get pregnant with a third I'll be having the boy because it's unlikely that there would be NO boys born from the group! I'm so sure I'll end up with all boys but I've actually become okay with it. I've just come to accept being a boy mom and it was hard but I refused to allow myself to be upset about only having boys. I read somewhere on a GD forum with my first that "it's not about NOT getting what you want, it's about WANTING what you've got". So since then I was determined to be completely happy and content with my boys and not be sad about not having a girl - it was hard initially but once I flipped my mind into knowing I had to be happy with MY circumstance and not dwell on others and what they got that I didn't - I started being actually happy with my family dynamic and when my sister gave birth to her second (a girl) after we both had boys first and always talked about our GD, I can honestly say I haven't felt an ounce of jealousy and I'm genuinely happy for her. Sure, I still wonder why some people seem to get everything they want when I feel they 'don't' deserve it.. but comparison is the thief of joy and I try to not acknowledge those thoughts when they come to mind!

We know what you're going through though, it's definitely a process... and don't think I'm trying to be all "I'm over my GD, woohoo.." just trying to let you know how I've overcome it and what helped me :)

[RKT Mama]

My boss/ arch nemesis is currently almost 36 weeks pregnant (had her last one at 34 weeks). She has 1 boy and I keep praying she has another boy because if she gets a girl and I don't, I really don't think I will handle it well at all. I have 4 other colleagues all pregnant between 14 weeks ahead and 8 weeks behind ( I am now 21 weeks). I am sure statistically at least 2 will get girls and that I can handle but not the boss!

[Mrs_P]

Oh hunny i'm so sorry your feeling sad, me to at the moment, maybe we could have a little pitty party together. I have my scan on tuesday and am still so sure it will be a boy.

Everyone keeps going on its boy number 4 for us and the hospital consultant i saw with my son the other day pointed out to me in a not so delicate way that my cvs test could be wrong and not to rely on it or get my hopes up, i always knew it was an option but having it stated so matter of factly like that really felt like a kick in the stomach - feels like the universe is telling me not to get my hopes up!

[bunnywabbit]

I'm so, so sorry. I can't imagine how difficult that must be. I'm going to sway my pink sway soon, and hubby and I have discussed this at length - we're not going to throw the kitchen sink at the attempt, but try what seems doable and see how things work out. It'll be our first child, so I'm telling myself I'm in a win-win situation - if I get my pink sway, I win, BUT I'm telling myself that it'll be a boy so I'll be right, so I win. Will see how I go when I get there there. Hoping if I start in that mindset now, it may not be too much of a strain should the sway fail. As long as the wee one is healthy.

Hang in there... x :bighug:

[weeziewoozles]

It's such a strong and complex feeling. It's full of fear, hope, jealousy, joy, envy, grief, guilt, excitement... I could go on. I think that for me the strongest feeling is hating it all being out of our direct control. I like being in control of my life and making the decisions etc. I am not enjoying all this uncertainty and waiting for an outcome beyond my control! DH and I want a girl so much that we're definitely thinking that if baby is a boy we'll fly to the US to get our girl technically next time. Sort of makes me feel calmer about gender this time. Then I feel guilty considering it as a healthy baby is an amazing result whatever gender. At least we have this forum to vent and support each other. I've only got seven damned weeks to wait till my gender scan! Thinking of you all x

[my4leafclover]

It stinks when it just sneaks up and hits ya. I haven't had it too bad with friends pregnancies, but strangely with all of these celeb. pregnancies!! Kim Kardashian will probably have a girl, Princess Kate will probably have the most adorable girl. Then I turn on the TV and see these extreme pagent/dance moms with dd's and I think. Ok THEY have dd's but somehow God doesn't want me to have one? :(

[aroundtheworld]

But Mum23Boys, you very well could be carrying a girl, right? You haven't had a scan yet, have you?

[Mum23boys]

I have and we didnt see a nub BUT we were carrying Fraternal twin and the tech told us that likelyhood was they were boy girl and she told us that Boy embryos are generally stronger than the girls so 70-30 chance we have the boy

[Pumpkin2011]

Mum23boys there is no way the tech could have known if you were carrying BG, BB or GG twins! That's really insensitive to say something like that just going by statistics. Don't pay attention to what she says. You may very well be carrying a little girl.

[rainbowflower]

I have and we didnt see a nub BUT we were carrying Fraternal twin and the tech told us that likelyhood was they were boy girl and she told us that Boy embryos are generally stronger than the girls so 70-30 chance we have the boy

not to go against what a specialist says.. BUT it's the opposite that has been proven time and time again, that it's girls that are the strongest. That's why in times of war or conflict it's the boy foetuses that are miscarried and why the sex ratio of babies born is predominantly female

[fish2012]

hey hun,

right what rainbow flower said that's the whole idea of the LE diet, ignore her that's just a daft thing to say they could have been GG, or BG and you could have sadly lost the B or indeed they could both have been boys. Don't tourture yourself over it twins wasn't meant to be this time around but you have a healthy baby in there, who could well be your dd.

could you get a private scan at 16weeks? you must be nearly there now xx

[aroundtheworld]

I am in complete agreement with the others... there is just no way to know for sure outside of a good scan or birth. You have just as much reason to hope as anyone else. Try to keep your head up- you could very well be carrying a little girl and will meet her soon!

[Mum23boys]

Thanks ladies. Im in a bit of a spin about whether to find out - Will start a new thread aout it so let me know what you think. x

[Justjessica]

Hope you are feeling a bit better now Mum23boys