Oh help, freaking out over BFP's not darkening

[LacePrincess]

I really should know better, shouldn't I?

Okay, so I am FREAKING that my BFP's aren't getting any darker. I've done IC's, Dollarama (Dollar Tree) tests, and 3 FRER's.

The darkest FRER was the first BFP at 12dpo (it wasn't super dark or anything but pretty clear.) IC was very faintly there.

Did another test at 15dpo, and FRER was lighter and IC was still the same.

Did more tests today and now I'm really worried. FRER is the same, IC same, $Tree light. OMG. At 17dpo, shouldn't everything be getting darker? The FRER is light but I will say I noticed the line DID appear much quicker, like I could see the line starting to show as soon as the pee travelled across. So this is the only thing I can cling onto for some hope!

Of course all I can think is I'm gonna miscarry. My temps are fine, my nausea's getting worse and more constant throught the day, so physically things seem to be progressing. It's just that every story I can find on the net seems to end badly.

I'm so worried, please someone talk me down!

[Dreamofpink]

Calm down dear! No seriously, it is worrying when you read lots of really sad stories on here. I only ever tested once with a hpt with each bub and once I saw the line I blindly thought it'd all be alright. I had no idea you could track a bfp's progression until finding this website. Sometimes too much info can be a bad thing :bigsmile:
Your other signs sound fab (though prob not in practise with the nausea!) and I'm sure you have a lovely pink sticky bean in there! I'm so pleased for you! I keep worrying too that when I do eventually get a bfp it'll end in disaster so I totally understand your worry. Sending you a big :hugs:

[harleyquinn]

Can you post a picture?

Otherwise I don't want to sugarcoat anything, ykwim. AT 17dpo they should be getting darker and I know someone is going to come along and rip my head off for saying that but I have been through this enough times;)

Hopefully its just dilute urine or as we both know, lines really mean squat when it comes to hcg levels...a line in a line and unless you are squinting, you are still in the game. The temp thing I have no idea about but this must mean things are good.

[LacePrincess]

Sorry, I haven't been taking pics, lol. Hubby's already thinking I'm nuts for staring at them so long. :(

I did hold my pee all afternoon, so it shouldn't have been dilute pee.....sigh.....The only thing I'm trying to hold onto is that the line is definitely appearing much quicker on the FRER than it did 5 days ago, but it's not getting darker. :(

I'm just so upset. I mean except for the tests, everything else symptom-wise and temp wise and CM/CP wise all line up. I just hope if it's not meant to be it won't drag out for weeks, nothing makes me feel more worried then reading about early miscarriages that took weeks to actually happen......

I guess I should just go get a different brand of test tomorrow. But I'm also scared too as if that'll be the nail in the coffin, kwim?

[harleyquinn]

I would trust your symptoms. They aren't going to be there if things are failing.

Since you are not a pic taker of poasticks (and seriously...get with the program lol) i am going to look for one of my pics of a 17dpo and you tell me if its darker than that. I know everyones different but i'm curious just how dark your line is. Is it close to as dark as the control?

[harleyquinn]

8591

Is it darker than this?

[glory]

Do you have your sticks still? If so take a pic of them in a line. They should be getting darker, in the early days though, the line from the day before can get darker over time so it looks like it is darker than it was the day before.

[LacePrincess]

Thanks for posting the pic, Harley!

I'd say today's was around exactly your pic, maybe a touch darker. Hubby informs me that the one from 12dpo was maybe a tad darker, which I guess could be from variances in dye in the test. I'm more freaked that it's not getting significantly darker.

It's almost like these tests are at odds with all my other symptoms. Stupid fracking tests! I do make myself throw them away because I spend too much time obsessively staring at them as it is.

Doesn't help that my doc doesn't do betas anyways, so nothing to do but wait. :( I kinda want to crawl into bed for a week and wake up to either puking (yay!) or bleeding (not so yay), LOL.

[LacePrincess]

Glory, I only kept my FRER's. I have 3 so far. No point taking a pic, it's too depressing.....the 12dpo looks very dark now, the 15dpo about the same now that it's dried, and today's looks much lighter. :( But today's is also still wet and they usually get darker as they dry so I'll wait and see.

I did get some dollartree ones today, so I'll do some more in the next few days and hope they show some progression. FRER's are too pricey for me to use daily!

[glory]

It may just be that over time the previous ones have gotten darker, it really does happen, hang in there, the early days are the worst, it is good if the line is getting there quicker xo

[harleyquinn]

A line like that at 17dpo is *not bad news*. I think its good its that dark and comparing them to ones that are days old isn't so great because they do change...hence why I take pics LOL

I think that is a respectable line for 5 days since getting a positive test. The test above I posted was from getting a bfp at 9dpo and the never progressing scenario. The next day after this, it was VERY noticeably lighter...in my experiene, these early pgs don't ~fade~ away slowly, they crash and burn very quickly so you KNOW. AS long as its still this strong, I would NOT be worrying. Worry when you see a drastic change. ((hugs))

[LacePrincess]

Thanks Harley. Memory does fade, and being catastrophizer-me and worst-case-scenario of course I remember it worse than it probably was!

Hubby reassures me that it wasn't much darker, if at all, than today's test. I know taking pics of them each day would probably be good, but not obsessing at all would probably be better, LMAO. I suppose since there is a 5 day difference it would be a BFN or barely squinty there at all if it things were going south. And I didn't test early either, as my LP is so short 12dpo pretty much was my expected AF date. So today is 5 days late for me.

Well, I guess I ought to try to do something else, eh? Off to find hubby and play some xbox, after all going to pee every 5 min to look for spotting isn't exactly helpful, lol. In the meantime, I guess I really shouldn't snack and put on any weight quite yet, LMAO!

Thanks ladies. I feel a little saner now. What's gonna happen is gonna happen anyways.

[harleyquinn]

Well sometimes talking it through helps even if we don't figure out much. :trips:

I have to hand it to your DH! Mine will hold one at arms length and look for .000001 of a second! LOL

I think you are going to be just fine...that pg feeling is hard to ignore. xx