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View Full Version : Going to be negative for a minute.



hplnvf03
February 14th, 2013, 08:18 PM
(I ended my previous post with this but I wanted to share my feelings with those who may have not seen it)

I don't get to come on here much and I've said this before but sometimes I really wish I did not know about swaying as an option. It makes me feel like i have some control over it and when I find out its a boy, I will feel like I did something wrong or not enough of something. Even the people but 100% into it and get the opposite, it just sucks. I know so much of it is luck, etc. But we put so much time and energy into it and to just possibly be disappointed. I know for some, it is worth trying, I get that.

If I did not know about this, I would just figure it was all based on my husbands sperm which is what i always believed was true. I just feel like it makes the disappointment worse. But then its the opposite for people who get their desired gender because they feel like they had some part in it. I don't know. I just wish I had less information/knowledge and I would just go with the flow more. Does anyone relate? I hate to sound so negative.

black&gold
February 14th, 2013, 08:35 PM
I feel ya! And to make things worse I feel like swaying for me has delayed getting pregnant and messed up my body (might not be the case at all, but I'm so used to get preggo first shot that naturally I'm blaming my diet etc. on the BFN's) For me though I've actually had a complete change of heart. I was at the point that it was so consuming my life and everything I did would result in the though "is this ruining my sway". I longed for the stress free TTC that I'd done before and what everyone else does where they do what they want, when they want and whatever happens happen. Anyways, after a couple BFN's I've realized my heart is more set on a baby, than a certain gender. What's even more weird is that once I realized this I'm actually WANTING a boy... like, fully eating a boy diet (basically my exact diet before all this of super healthy, snacking etc.) - weird, I know! But I agree that I sometimes wish I didn't know! For me I had to drop it because I'm a natural worrier and I stress out about E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G so it just wasn't working, but I still love coming on here and reading about everyone that got what they wanted etc. So it's definitely hard. I know how you feel for sure!

hplnvf03
February 14th, 2013, 08:50 PM
After my miscarriage, I felt the same way and started trying immediately and got pregnant. I was too worried by waiting, it would delay it longer and I was ready to be pregnant. I think that this decision swayed boy bc I had so much fertile CM and had such a high sex drive. It seems most people get pregnant with boys right after. But I would not have known this if I had not read some of the swaying info. I am glad I am not alone and it seems like you have just as much of a chance at a girl, maybe by being more relaxed and not worrying and feeling at peace? Good luck, hope you get pregnant soon!

Wanting-a-girl
February 14th, 2013, 10:09 PM
My sway ended quite half assed too... I started snacking on some no most days lol the only food I ever cut out was red meat I did the diet religiously the first month but had a chemical which in Turn made me a lazy swayed although I still took my aspirin and still drank sooo much pep tea that the thought of it now makes me Ill lol... Really I did is a good as I could do it and in the end I feel like I wanted a baby in general more then a specific gender

Like I said don't get down you have a great chance at having your girl in you

Wanting-a-girl
February 14th, 2013, 10:10 PM
Partly why my sway turned half ass is cause I thought well I don't want to do all this work like crazy insane to be told boy cause that will sting a bit more

afy
February 14th, 2013, 10:15 PM
I have those days too where I think ok what if I'm chugging down v-8 with beef gelatin powder *shivers* to be told girl! And get loose then I have stricter days ! Lol why couldn't it be easier hey !!

RKT Mama
February 14th, 2013, 11:17 PM
I fully agree that at the end of the day, God, karma, luck or whatever power you believe in will decide if you land up with a girl or boy or even that you get pregnant at all.
However I also believe that it is the only power I have in trying to control the sex of my baby. That way I can say I did all I could if I ever have regrets one day
I had one sway that failed then tried IVF/PGD which cost me a fortune and landed me up with 3 embryos that they couldn't find DNA on. Didn't fall pregnant though. Tried adopting a baby so I knew it would be a girl. That failed.
Made the horrid decision to try again and sway the best I could. It was extremely frustrating, the more you read the more you have no idea if what you are eating, doing or squirting up is right or wrong. Every time I cheated I was petrified that I had ruined my sway. It took 7 long months before I got my BFP and even then I felt guilty for eating because I might loose the baby and have to start again.
But my sway worked and the scan says girl. Was it worth it? I will only know once she is here but at least I can say I will have no regrets when I am old that I didn't do everything I could to get a daughter.

hplnvf03
February 14th, 2013, 11:26 PM
Wow, that is a story RKT mama! Congrats on your girl! Did you post your sway? haha after everything I said, would love to read it. I can see your point, that you gave it your all with no regrets. I think that is part of the problem for me, I did not give it my all and therefore, feel like I failed a bit. Either way, I really really do just want a healthy baby and i'm sure I'll fall in love with a boy.

RKT Mama
February 15th, 2013, 02:28 AM
Wow, that is a story RKT mama! Congrats on your girl! Did you post your sway? haha after everything I said, would love to read it. I can see your point, that you gave it your all with no regrets. I think that is part of the problem for me, I did not give it my all and therefore, feel like I failed a bit. Either way, I really really do just want a healthy baby and i'm sure I'll fall in love with a boy.

My sway is somewhere on the boards.
At the end of the day a healthy baby is a blessing, not a failure and boys are wonderful.
All around me people seem to get both sexes without ever thinking about it or knowing that swaying even exists so it should be possible for anyone whether you sway or not.
I really hope you get your girl.

NearlyDone
February 15th, 2013, 06:25 AM
I went into sway believeing after 4 girls i would never get a boy anyway but at least id of done everything i 'know' iykwim......my first sway was okish but i really only did as much as i was comfortable with.......my latest sway was CRAP barely even qualified as a sway i o'ed really late the previous month so i was being super lazy cheating all the time(thinking i woould o late again) but i o'ed bang on day 14...i contemplated not trying because id cheated so much but was just desperate to get pregnant.....and somehow it 'worked'

Atsaukina1
February 15th, 2013, 08:30 AM
I did my best w/o doing things I thought were too much for me and I knew that it was still 50/50 either way. it is out of my hands. I will get what I am meant to get. Maybe i will sway it in my favor 55/45 just a lil lol. I think if you go into w/ that mind set then you will be fine either way.

hplnvf03
February 15th, 2013, 10:35 AM
Thank you for all your honest posts. My husband is so support and we talked a lot last night. I can't wait to meet this baby!

my4leafclover
February 16th, 2013, 10:26 AM
I can relate, but on a whole different level. I went HT and after 5 cycles, still no dd. My 1st cycle I was over stimmed and all of my eggs were bad because of it. Second cycle was microsort and 5 probe fish. I had 3 normal girls but that is only testing those 5 chromosomes and they were weak. I implanted all 3 and bfn. Three more cycles and only one normal girl( and she didn't quite look right either to me). In the end we came full circle we decided to give our boy a chance. I actually put back the gitl and 2 boys, one of which was a strong hatching blast and I am 99% sure the little one I am carrying. I am happy to be able to have a healthy(hopefully) little one at 40, but very sad and even mad at the universe at times. I see all of these people with dd, some who use and abuse the privelage(sp) and wonder why not me? I tried as hard as I possibly could but was too little too late. I envy all of the 20 somethings coming into motherhood and all of the information, science and options they will have.