How can I stop breastfeeding toddler?

[Kiara]

Hi! Im still breastfeeding my 2,5 year old (mostly when she wants to sleep, but she wants during the day too) Now Im pregnant and I guess its time to stop. But How? She still wakes up at night wanting to bf . Should I stop little by little? Its so difficult. Anyone been in the same situation? I honestly dont know if im going to be able to bf both the new baby and my dd, I wont get any sleep at all!

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, I have and I ended up continuing to breastfeed and ended up BF both of them. It was harder than you think it will be during pregnancy but easier than you think it will be afterwards. I found that after a little bit of jealousy at first they learned to wait their turn and it was very handy for when I was making too much milk.

You may find that at about age 3 or so, she is going to just stop waking up at night anyway. This has happened with all of mine, even at 2 1/2 they would wake up but by the time they turned 3 they were sleeping thru the night without any efforts on my part.

[Wanting-a-girl]

As- is it normal for breast fed babes to wake up at night for feedings after 1 then? My friend is getting really frusterated with her 1 year old cause she is still waking for feedings

Sorr to intrude

[mommymachine]

I'm going I echo atomic. Y kids start sleepig through the night at 3 and that's when we move them out of our room. My 2.5 year old still wakes up for a bottle an my 14 month old still is up 1-2 times to nurse:)

[Cinss]

I guess they are all different, the thing i did was when DD turned 1 and would wake up in the night for a feed i would offer her a bottle of water, she pretty quickly decided that was not worth waking up for and started sleeping through, i would just BF her in the morning and before bed until she was 14 months then i wanted to stop so i just replaced BM with normal milk in a bottle, she got the hang of it pretty quick and was fully weaned in about 3 days.

[Kiara]

Thanks a lot for your answers! Everybody is telling me "you have to stop now, it going to be so hard for her and you when the new baby is here and she is so big now" And I feel so pressured. It really doesnt bother me to bf her still even though she is 2,5. But I dont want it to be difficult for her when the new baby arrives, I dont want her to feel left out. But it sounds great like you say as, maybe its easier afterwards.

[Mum to three girls]

I've just seen this. My DD2 was 2 years and 8 months when we stopped. For about a year she was down to 1-2 feeds/day and I was over it (although not pregnant). She was very verbal and I asked her when she thought we should stop, we were on holiday and she answered when we were home and had picked up the cat from the Cattery.

So we stopped after that and she was fine. Maybe you could ask her when she'd be ready to stop?

In my experience night weaning is best done with daddy taking over the night times.

[Mel1983]

I breasted my 2 boys till about that age too, the waking at night started getting on my nerves in the end. They were just waking for comfort feeds! I told them that the milk or booby as I called it had been taken away by the fairies to the other babies as they were big boys now. At night with my second I only offered water and wore a tight top to stop me breast feeding when really tired. The first night was hell. Crying lots! Second night was so much. Stated by 3rd. Itchy he didn't wake up. U just need to be strong if u really want to do it u can! You'll have a couple of bad nights but that will be it promise! They forget so quickly . Good luck

[Mel1983]

I breasted my 2 boys till about that age too, the waking at night started getting on my nerves in the end. They were just waking for comfort feeds! I told them that the milk or booby as I called it had been taken away by the fairies to the other babies as they were big boys now. At night with my second I only offered water and wore a tight top to stop me breast feeding when really tired. The first night was hell. Crying lots! Second night was so much. Stated by 3rd. Itchy he didn't wake up. U just need to be strong if u really want to do it u can! You'll have a couple of bad nights but that will be it promise! They forget so quickly . Good luck

That was ment to say 2nd night was much better. 3rd he didn't wake up at all. Sorry texting on my iPhone too quickly I think!!

[Longingforgirl]

Hi,
I just wanted to add that with my DS2 I couldn't explain anything to him yet as he wouldn't understand it. I breastfed him until he was about 2 and a half years old. I tried to phase it out, but I guess he could feel that I wanted to stop and so he demanded even more. So in the end I would bf about 10 times a day and a couple of times at night as well. :suprise:
I only found one way for us - as weird as it sounds but I put mustard on my nipples. Lol. When he first tried to drink he looked a little confused but kept on drinking anyhow. So I added curry to the mustard. And that worked. He was less upset than I had thought. He continued to say "clean" but I explained that this was not possible. And he somehow got it, although it took quite some time. I think this was not the best way to end it but it was the only way that worked for him. And I was very relieved when it was over because it had gotten so out of hand.

[jennaesue]

First of all, if you don't want to stop, you don't have to. I'm sorry you are feeling pressured.

I nursed my ds2 until right around when he turned 3. I cut down slowly, so at first, it was only once or twice during the day, and then at bedtime (and if he woke up at night), then once a day and at bedtime, and then only at bedtime. I did it gradually over several weeks, and if he asked for it, I would just say "no, not now" and give him a cup. By the time he weaned completely, I am pretty sure there was very little milk left anyway.

With my ds3, I decided to wean earlier because we wanted to ttc (and I don't seem to cycle while bfing). In June, he was 19 months, and I went away for a long weekend. That was a good point to cut down significantly, so after that, I only bfed him before nap and before bed/at night. In August, when he was 21 months, I went away for another long weekend, and this time I didn't pump (ouch -I was producing more milk than I thought!) and when I got back, my milk had pretty much dried up. So that was that! I did wean him to a bottle, which I am regretting now, because he is very attached to his "baba" at almost 2.5.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

[Kiara]

Thank you all so much! You helped me a lot. Nice to talk with people that not think you are weird for bf a toddler :bfinfant:

[motherofboys]

I breastfed DS 3 until the month before he turned 3. I had wanted to stop for ages but feared the weaning process and what I'd do afterwards as it was his comfort, his distraction and his sleep aid.
I spent a few months telling him how when he was a 'big boy' he wouldn't need mummys milk any more, he'd be like his big brothers. He potty trained by himself and I used that to reinforce what a big boy he was now.
We talked openly with the 3 boys about the idea of 'one day' having another baby and I would tell him that when he was finished with my milk (so it sounded like his decision) we would have another baby and that baby would drink my milk (I had been ttc and planned originally to tandem but in the end it took 2 and a half years to fall pregnant)
When he was approaching 3 and still not showing any signs of wanting to wean and I was starting to get to the point where I was done I began telling him that by the time he was 3 he'd be such a big boy that all my milk would be gone. I told him mummys only made enough to last until their babies were 3 then it ran out. He understood about other things running out and seemed to accept this most of the time.
I was invited away with some friends at the start of Feb for the weekend so decided that this would be the perfect opportunity. I spent the weekend away and when I came back he asked for milk and I said I was sorry but it was all gone. He cried the first time I said it and I was full and sore and it was hard to say no. That night I put him to bed, still laying next to him, but just reading and singing until he fell asleep.
He adjusted really quickly and although he did ask a few times the next day he didn't cry, just pouted and asked for something to eat instead. His appitite has always been small so he seemed to be eating twice- three times as much! And he gained so much weight. His birthday was at the beginning of march, but with in a week he was no longer asking.
I got my bfp 5 days after stopping feeding him and now that he knows about the baby he talks about how it will drink my milk.
I was sad I couldn't let him self wean but I do think its important to stop when it is no longer desired by 1 or both parties. And I was thankful the weaning process was not as hard as I expected.
Now I've had a little break (only 2 months so far) I'm ready to feed the next baby.

[PrimalMamma]

It's lovely reading all these stories. I'm still breastfeeding my son, who will be 3 in July. After only breastfeeding my first for 3 weeks I'm so proud of myself but I am ready to stop when he is. (Although I kinda like the idea of tandem feeding, call me crazy!! Lol) 💙


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[motherofboys]

Primal mamma I always liked the idea of tandem feeding. I hear it can help with the bond between siblings and also the older child can help with any engorgement.


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[atomic sagebrush]

I did tandem twice and if you get engorged like I do, it is AWESOME. It's hard to nurse all thru pregnancy but if you can stick with it, it is SOO great when the baby comes. With my first 3 I really had a terrible time with engorgement and then it also helps a lot if you are prone to getting mastitis (for some reason I get it more than the average person) because you can count on your older bub to help keep things draining! :)

[PrimalMamma]

So how long did you end up feeding for Atomic? I'm fine with feeding & he is obviously fine too but sometimes I worry that he might look back when he is older & be grossed out by the memory of breastfeeding.


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[PrimalMamma]

So how long did you end up feeding for Atomic? I'm fine with feeding & he is obviously fine too but sometimes I worry that he might look back when he is older & be grossed out by the memory of breastfeeding.


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[atomic sagebrush]

till 4. Only before bed or when sick for the whole last 1 1/2 years though. Ds 3 was a super picky eater and not a good sleeper and I honestly needed to continue that long with him for my sanity then DS 4 is a middle child so I felt needed the extra attention.

[motherofboys]

I think that the environment in which they are raised and the attitude to breastfeeding they are around can make a difference to how they remember breastfeeding.
My oldest boys don't remember feeding, but they have seen me feed the younger ones, including ds3 up to 2years 11 months. They giggle about boobs like any other boys but they know they were fed with them and that they are for feeding, so the way we can desperate our breast in to two completely unrelated functions, feeding, and sexual, they will hopefully be able to as well.


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[maidentomother]

My brother was breastfed until just after 4 and coslept until age 8! No one made him feel embarrassed about it so he never was, despite remembering it to this day.

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

Kudos to you - I hope I can keep breastfeeding again while pregnant. I would love to be able to tandem nurse.


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[atomic sagebrush]

People say a lot of things about their babies sleeping thru the night and I think most of them are stretching the truth. Sleeping from midnight to 5 am is not sleeping thru the night LOL. No difference between that and a baby that sleeps from 8-12 and then from 12:30-5.

Developmentally babies are may not even be SUPPOSED to sleep thru the night at 6 weeks. They get quite a bit of nourishment during those night feedings.

[atomic sagebrush]

Kudos to you - I hope I can keep breastfeeding again while pregnant. I would love to be able to tandem nurse.


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It can be hard, I did it twice so let me know if you need any help.