PLEASE help:)

[lovemysonbut]

Hello,
I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks in December. I did not take time off and TTC right away. \It has been almost 6 months and I'm still not pregnant. This is the last cycle I can get pregnant before my due date. It will be my last child and I've ALWAYS wanted a daugther but I really just want a healthy child; I love my son so much and want him to have a sibling close in age (I always wanted t2 or less years apart, now they'll be almost 3 IF I don't miscarry again!) I get so depressed every month I get my period, it's never taken me more than a month to conceive before (my second pregnancy was conceived EIGHT days prior to o!!!!) I've been using a 2-3 day cutoff, refresh (lime before, but dropped it when no getting pg) sudafed (dropped as well), vitex, aspirin, cal/mag (should I keep these or drop these because they are alkaline).
I skip breakfast, don't eat until noon ( I have NEVER been a breakfast skipper, and fell like I['m going to pass out especially since I get up at 5 for work,it is SO HARD). I basically drink crystal light all day (I feel like I've been poisining my body doing this in such high quantities for 6 months straight ) and avoid fruits and veg, eat low sodium crackers, cumcumbers, swiss cheese and yogurt pretty exclusively. After 6 months of this, I'm killing my health and my social life because I keep avoiding any outings that involve food. I always cheat LIKE CRAZY during the 2ww beccause I'm so sick of this bland and unhealthy diet.
I really want to get pg this cycle, so need help deciding what to eat and when to bd. I am living with my in laws who eat A TON and drink tons of beer/wine and go out for breakfast every weekend so it's tougher than ever this month,but I'll do the best I can because getting pg is the most important thing now.
Can I drink any alcohol/coffee on LE?
ARe pumpkin seeds/sesame seeds good ? (highest in mag, want to avoid supps because alkaline)
should I take b6 or not because nutrients sway boy?
what other foods are good for girl/high in cal/mag?
When should I BD? I o on CD 21 with vitex (WAY later without, so discouraging my cycles are so long so every month I don't get pg I have to wait FOREVER), and it's currently CD 14 and haven't BD once (living with in laws)(. I'm away until CD 17 so can't start BD until then.). Here are my ideas, wait until 0+12, but scared I won't get pregnant and so hard to time or could be the middle of the night. or BD every day through o starting 5 days before..... OR BD CD 17,18, 19 with 2 day cut off or CD 18,19 with 2 day cut off. What do you think my best option is?
Also, should I drop the coffee? It's SO hard for me esp with skipping breakfast. What about beer.wine?
THANKS SO MUCH. One more thing, anyone been through a missed miscarriage. I'mhavivng a really hard time coping and moving on, and swaying for 6 months isn't helping:)

[Lown]

Hi, I am sorry for your loss. I have had a few early miscarriages and they are hard emotionally. Their are a lot of people on here that have had later miscarriages that post on here which may help, but it does leave people feeling empty inside and that a void has been created that needs filled so I can understand why your are desperate to get pregnant ASAP.

I can tell reading through your post that you are quite stressed at present, and not surprisingly giving what you are going through at present.
Your post has asked alot of questions and it seems to me that you need to look at what is stressing you out the most in order of preference and then start to deal with them one by one. It takes time to get you head around swaying and if you are new to this site it takes a few weeks to get you head around the key messages.

Firstly, the LE diet is not meant to make you miserable, it is about cutting fat, calories and protein but without making yourself stressed and starving. It may be that your long cycle is due to PCOS and yo-yo dieting can make that worse. How about increasing your intake of food to a level that you know you will be able to maintain over the next 6 months. Fruit is allowed on LE diet and veg is a Must-please be kind to your body!!

Next, vitex, are you stopping after day cd14, if not this could be prolonging ovulation. Stop vitex at day 14 or positive ovulation test, which ever comes first

Coffee and booze are good on LE diet, caffeine is not thought to sway, however they is some research that caffeine could increase risk of miscarriage so may be worth being sensible with caffeine after positive pregnancy test

Ca/mg atomic has done an essay on it, perhaps someone can link it I am not computer whizz

When to bd, o +12 you are unlikely to get pregnant, again there is another essay on this. Also it is thought that timing and cut off do not sway either. Most people here are starting of with one attempt at Positive ovulation, then each month either increasing the number of attempts or dropping a sway tactic that is causing them the most stress. Generally it is best to drop sway tactics one at a time so you know inside that you will have no regrets.

I know that you are desperate to get pregnant before you due date but I think you may just need a bit of time and a bit of support from the people on this site to make a decision about swaying ie keeping the swaying tactic that work-LE diet, and dropping things that are not thought to matter like cut off

I have not answered all your questions but I hope this calms you abit to allow you to read more in to the subject and make the right choices for you

Good luck

[HopefulMonster]

Aww hun so sorry to hear about your m/c, if it makes you feel better I completely feel your pain! I've had two missed miscarriages that only turned up on the NT/12 week scan. I had a hard time getting over them too, I think because your body still thinks you are pregnant it makes it especially tough trying to move on, esp as you usually find out in quite a traumatic way too. After the first I was soooo depressed, we didn't ttc again for another year, then it happened again and I felt like the unluckiest person in the world. 2 cycles of trying after and I was blessed with a healthy pregnancy, which is honestly the best cure for it I could recommend. You will honestly feel right again when you get pregnant, or at least that was what happened for me.

As it's been 6 months of trying for you, I wouldn't even bother attempting an o+12 or anything like that. If you're already having a bit of trouble getting a bfp the more you do to sway pink the harder it is. The diet is most important and you have a very strict diet going on there!

I would maybe consider taking soy isoflavones if you are truly desperate to get pregnant fast. I've added them to my own sway for that very reason and today was my first day on them. From all the stats I've read, a very large percentage of women who take it manage to get pregnant within 2 cycles, but usually their first on it. The only non-pink downside is that they can increase your ewcm but I've had none my last few cycles so a little bit might help me actually get pregnant and I have antihistamine to take in case it really is tons.

I think you should decide what is more important to you - I asked myself if I wanted to keep trying every month for the next 12 months and get a girl, or get pregnant tomorrow and have a boy, and I would honestly rather be pregnant tomorrow with a boy than have 12 months of hell stressing and obsessing and worrying and being depressed about ttc. I can't do it to myself or my family, so I balanced a good pink sway alongside some less good tactics to hopefully get pregnant fast (soy isoflavones, & BD through ovulation instead of just one attempt) Does that make sense? Oh and I drink wine every night now, it decreases my condition and actually sways pink I think! xxxx

[luckyfourleafclover]

I am so sorry to hear about your M/C and totally understand how desperate you feel. In 2007 I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks with my second pregnancy.
It took me 5 months to get pregnant again and what really helped for me was that a scan showed up that my body was still producing pregnancy hormones long after my miscarriage.
I had some sessions with a fabulous acupuncture practitioner here in London. It was my first experience of acupuncture and I was very sceptical about it but I was at the stage where I would have literally tried anything. He worked on rebalancing my hormones and calming me down too, as I was so stressed out about it.
I totally believe it worked and my beautiful second son is now 4 (and a total terror!)....as for the age gap concerns, you mustn't worry about that. My kids have 3.5 years between them and they are best friends, have shared interests (mainly cars and lego!) and play together beautifully...

At that time in my life I hadn't yet begun to feel the pain of Gender Desire so that was not my concern but I wish you good luck with your sway and I am sure you will be pregnant soon.

[Pumpkin2011]

I am so sorry for your loss!!

I don't know if it helps, I've been trying for 6 months some cycles I even had two mature follicles but couldn't get pregnant. My last cycle I stopped aspirin after O (I know you are not supposed to do that but somehow I had a feeling I needed to stop taking it) and I fell pregnant. That's pretty much the only thing I dropped. I have read of other ladies on here having trouble getting pregnant while on aspirin so I am guessing for some people it might prevent implantation??