had a mini breakdown yesterday=(

[hlmcdaniels]

I guess after hearing Kim Kardashian is having a girl on their show yesterday, it hit me that it'll probably never happen to me.. I don't know if its because my emotions are completely crazy this pregnancy or if I am doubting my sway, and that my months of planning could have failed. ALL symptoms I have are night and day from my boys, both my dh and I have had gender dreams that it is a girl, and I really thought this would be our girl but now that or scan is quickly approaching, i'm terrified that I will hear "boy". I told my dh last night that i'm not sure how I will handle the news if it is our third boy.. I feel awful saying this but i'm hoping I don't have a major breakdown.. i'm just so physically sick with constant nausea and my emotions are so up and down this time I am constantly on edge.. sorry to vent yet again :( I had to somewhere

[Adia]

What time if your scan? What time zone?

Consider the envelope idea to keep you from losing it in the u/s room.

I was with DH and DD2 when we heard GIRL for DD3. I tried so hard not to cry but I did. DH just gave me an intense stare telling me it was ok and not to worry. He was so good but we both were SUPER depressed the entire weekend after that. We couldn't even look at each other.

My point is, we understand AND it will be ok either way. I know you have plans of HT if you need it and I think that is a HUGE consolation! So no matter what you'll get that little girl!

[3boys]

I know its hard hun but the tech said the nub looked very girly didn't She?! I'm sure you have a little girl cooking away in there.

I agree with Aida I think the envelope idea is a good idea if you don't want to breakdown on the ultrasound table. And having HT plans in place is an added relief regardless of what sex this little bean is. It is hard to get through when you have an apposite but right now concentrate on the positives.... Everything is in your favour. Xxxxxx

[hlmcdaniels]

thank you both so much:( we did plan on doing HT.. but after this pregnancy I really don't know if I could physically do it again, I have truly been miserable since i've gotten my bfp.. I am on two different medications to control the vomiting and still no hope. I picked up a few extra shifts at the hospital to keep myself busy until Friday, and if it is a girl I guess the added money will come in handy for girl clothes, I just really hope it does happen and I do hear girl. My Scan is at 11:00 am EST(about an hour ahead of you Adia) So ill keep you both posted! We plan on putting the results in an envelope and dh having ds1 and 2 do a balloon reveal I just don't know if that'll be a good idea to have family involved, maybe we will keep it just to us. Adia do you plan on doing HT?

[hlmcdaniels]

I know its hard hun but the tech said the nub looked very girly didn't She?! I'm sure you have a little girl cooking away in there.

I agree with Aida I think the envelope idea is a good idea if you don't want to breakdown on the ultrasound table. And having HT plans in place is an added relief regardless of what sex this little bean is. It is hard to get through when you have an apposite but right now concentrate on the positives.... Everything is in your favour. Xxxxxx

yes she did but I guess I still have doubts :( just reading things on IG how a penis miraculously appears that would be my odds

[BabyGirl4Me]

Oh sweetie, prayers and fingers crossed you hear girl. I was going to look at microsort with IUI and clomid in Mexico if my sway didn't work and that helped me cope a bit. I just went through what you did and wouldn't wish it upon anyone. I was also terrified that there were like, not enough girls to go around or something. Like, just because all these other people were having girls I had to have another boy to balance out their girls.

DH and I went to lunch before our scan and we saw a family with 4 girls. No joke. I was like, OMG...I hope that's not a bad sign from the universe saying there are too many girls already so you have to have a boy... Turns out though that even though there are families with many girls, there are still enough girls to go around and there's no reason why *you* can't have a girl cookin in you right now!

Honestly, hearing girl at my scan felt surreal, like...wait...are you SURE this is my baby up on that monitor? I thought I only made boys? There were 4 girls at the restaurant...so this one has to be a boy to balance out, right? LOL. You deserve that big rush of joy and relief too. Good luck hun, and if there is anything at all we can do to help you let us know. :HH:

[hlmcdaniels]

Oh sweetie, prayers and fingers crossed you hear girl. I was going to look at microsort with IUI and clomid in Mexico if my sway didn't work and that helped me cope a bit. I just went through what you did and wouldn't wish it upon anyone. I was also terrified that there were like, not enough girls to go around or something. Like, just because all these other people were having girls I had to have another boy to balance out their girls.

DH and I went to lunch before our scan and we saw a family with 4 girls. No joke. I was like, OMG...I hope that's not a bad sign from the universe saying there are too many girls already so you have to have a boy... Turns out though that even though there are families with many girls, there are still enough girls to go around and there's no reason why *you* can't have a girl cookin in you right now!

Honestly, hearing girl at my scan felt surreal, like...wait...are you SURE this is my baby up on that monitor? I thought I only made boys? There were 4 girls at the restaurant...so this one has to be a boy to balance out, right? LOL. You deserve that big rush of joy and relief too. Good luck hun, and if there is anything at all we can do to help you let us know. :HH:

Thank u so much I am so happy for you!! Could they easily tell you girl for sure? I will be 14w5d when I go for my scan i'm just scared that it'll be too early

[BabyGirl4Me]

Thank u so much I am so happy for you!! Could they easily tell you girl for sure? I will be 14w5d when I go for my scan i'm just scared that it'll be too early

YES! The tech said she knew right away when she looked at the girl bits. She actually teaches ultrasound tech and does high risk pg scanning for a hospital and told me all kinds of neat stuff about u/s! She actually explained how people can be told the wrong gender based on umbilical chord and things like that, and also said that when she put those red/blue lights (can't remember what they were called) that's a way to like, super confirm the baby's sex.

I was measuring 14+1 exactly that day according to the scan and the tech said the girl bits were obvious. She said my daughter was a "textbook girl" in fact, lol. Good luck hun!

[KidAtHeart]

Personally, I would not involve the rest of the family. You may need some time to process the information just you and your husband - even if it's a girl! It will be a surprise to the kids no matter what, so you can plan for how you want to reveal it to them.

We did the envelope thing, and I am so glad I did it that way. Well, it would have been cool to hear 'it's a girl', but if it had been a boy, I don't think I would have handled it very well in front of other people. Good luck to you!!

[Adia]

Personally, I would not involve the rest of the family. You may need some time to process the information just you and your husband - even if it's a girl! It will be a surprise to the kids no matter what, so you can plan for how you want to reveal it to them.

We did the envelope thing, and I am so glad I did it that way. Well, it would have been cool to hear 'it's a girl', but if it had been a boy, I don't think I would have handled it very well in front of other people. Good luck to you!!

I could not agree more. Their is something very difficult about the third baby if it is of the same gender when you so desperately want your DG. I would HIGHLY advise you NOT to have your whole family there if that is what you are talking about when you say "involving family".

If I can ever get prego here, I am SERIOUSLY considering going to the gender scan completely alone. I am sure that sounds horrible in regards to DH but I just don't know if I can handle looking at him in an u/s room if I hear "girl" again. I will need to know asap so we'll have to see when the time comes.....

I would set up whatever stops you have to save yourself having to face everyone if its a boy. If its a girl, scrap everything and tell everyone, but set up fail safe scenarios like "baby wouldn't cooperate, still don't know gender" in case you hear boy.

As for your question about HT, no, this baby (that is still taking its sweet time to be conceived), if it ever gets here it will be the end of the line for me. I am 37 and I have had enough issues physically that I am pushing it having one more. Financially we are completely INSANE to have one more child but I'd regret it more if we didn't try. I have often thought I would never go HT for a variety of reasons, but honestly I have many days that if I even thought we could swing the cost, I'd do it in an instant to get over all the heartache of GD and swaying. Although chances are, I'd be a lousy candidate for some bizarre reason!!!

[Adia]

Honestly, hearing girl at my scan felt surreal, like...wait...are you SURE this is my baby up on that monitor? I thought I only made boys? There were 4 girls at the restaurant...so this one has to be a boy to balance out, right? LOL. You deserve that big rush of joy and relief too. Good luck hun, and if there is anything at all we can do to help you let us know. :HH:

Hey congrats Babygirl4me! I was stalking you last week but had to work and got sidetracked on everything. So happy to hear you heard girl! What a great news!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Going to the ultrasound alone with DD was the best idea I ever had. I was nervous but nothing at all like I had been with DS 4. I know some people were pissed off at me for not telling anyone but it was a really good thing for me. ♥

[Adia]

Going to the ultrasound alone with DD was the best idea I ever had. I was nervous but nothing at all like I had been with DS 4. I know some people were pissed off at me for not telling anyone but it was a really good thing for me. ♥

That settles it, I will go alone. It will be better for everyone in the long run. I am the one who suffers through the pregnancy and has suffered from GD for 5 years so a few minutes alone with an u/s tech isn't too much to ask anyone, even DH.

[Adia]

hlmcdaniels, I'll be checking tomorrow especially after 10am CST! Update us with how the appointment went even if you don't know the gender. Let us know when you will open the envelope if that's what you decide to do.

I'll be thinking about you all morning!!

[hlmcdaniels]

Adia, thank you so much!! I'll let you know!! we will be doing the envelope thing and buying either pink or blue balloons =]

[zebaniee]

Good luck h :)

[hlmcdaniels]

thank you everyone!! two more hours until we find out!!! :nails:

[BabyGirl4Me]

Best of luck! :luck:

[3boys]

Good luck :) thinking about you

[crazyladyneedsababy]

stalking :)

[hlmcdaniels]

ladies its a boy:(.. i'm not sure if i'm going to be back, i'm taking the news pretty badly:'(

[3boys]

I'm so sorry you didn't hear girl. Sending lots of hugs sweetheart

Are they 100% sure as you are still early!?

[missmegrn]

I am so sorry you aren't having a girl. Take your time in the healing process and come back when you are ready.

[hlmcdaniels]

She didn't give us a percentage but I go back to confirm at 17 weeks which I don't think I can bring myself to do..

[Adia]

Oh honey, I am so sorry. Believe me, as many others can attest, the 3 child of the same gender can hurt. We all understand. Something about that 3rd one is just tough. DD3 is the beat of my heart and I did learn to separate her from my desire for a boy, but it took time.

Big, big hugs mama! I relate so well.

[3boys]

She didn't give us a percentage but I go back to confirm at 17 weeks which I don't think I can bring myself to do..

Oh babe :( again I'm so sorry. I think you should go or else you will drive ourself crazy.

when pregnant with DS3 I had the worst GD i cried all throughout, but he really is my absolute pride and joy, I'm not saying that the other two aren't because obviously I love them all equal but DS3 is my special little boy and I wouldn't trade him for all the girls in the world. It feels awful now but I promise one day you will look at him and know he chose you.

[Smiley13]

I'm so sorry your having a hard time. I know its hard to imagine now but your boys will be so close and become the best of friends. Your going to love watching them grow up together. HUGS

[deaks66]

so sorry. i can only repeat what the others have said. I took it really bad hearing i was expecting ds3 and cried and cried for weeks. But by the end of my pregnancy i had my head around it and the moment he was born i fell head over heels. It will get easier i promise. Hugs

[BabyGirl4Me]

I think you should go to confirm at 17 weeks just in case. *big hugs* and we're all here for support.

[Charlee]

It looks like I'm having a 3rd boy too and the GD has hit hard also :( I'm going for an official gender scan next Friday but I'm not hopeful it will be different.... just know you aren't alone in your feelings :hugs:

I think our feelings will change once we meet our new little guys though... time heals all...

[crazyladyneedsababy]

Im so sorry hun, congrats on your new little man though. I hope time heals and Im glad the option is there for you to still get your girl through high tech in the future :bighug:

[black&gold]

I'm so sorry, but am almost positive I'll be right behind you! I would go again at 17weeks just to confirm as the odd person gets told the wrong thing! You were pretty confident with this persons skill though... I'm really sorry you're going through this and hope you come back to chat because we ALL know how you feel!!! xoxoxo and I TOTALLY had the same thought when I was watching KUWTK and saw them tell kill. I love that I'm not the only person that watches that :)

[RedCanoe]

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. :(

I was in your shoes with DS3, as well. He was a failed sway and it felt like everyone else on my due date board (on IG) was getting their DG. Not fun. But now I look at this amazing, funny little boy and I'm so glad that he's here. Also, I know that we would have stopped at 3 kids if he had been a girl and it makes me wonder if we were just meant to have 4. It feels so right somehow now, having these 4 kids in my life.

You mentioned you could try HT for your next baby. Having the HT option was what got me through the GD of my 3rd pregnancy. I knew that I could try one last time and if it worked I would have the gender guarantee...

[Yuzu]

I'm so, so sorry you didn't hear girl. I know it's hard right now. As the mom of four boys, #3 was the hardest to hear. I don't know why. But I got through it, and I know you will too. *hugs*

[atomic sagebrush]

I'm so sorry. :(

[Adia]

....I know it's hard right now. As the mom of four boys, #3 was the hardest to hear. I don't know why. But I got through it, and I know you will too. *hugs*

Something about that 3rd one is just gutting at the u/s....they usually end up being the epitome of our hearts walking around outside of our body!

[zebaniee]

I'm sorry h, I had bad GD with my 2nd daughter and I remember crying and considering going to a counsellor becuase I was so upset. Time did help and by the end of the pregnancy I was thrilled with my new addition.

Take it easy and be kind to yourself.

I am pregnant with my 3rd (fingers crossed it is my long awaited son) and somedays I feel physically sick because of my fear that I will hear it is my 3rd girl. It is another 10 weeks or so until I can find out. I am thinking about booking an earlier gender scan though as I am not sure I want to wait that long.

[hlmcdaniels]

please keep me updated.. I could really use a friend going through something similar to me.. it will help
It looks like I'm having a 3rd boy too and the GD has hit hard also :( I'm going for an official gender scan next Friday but I'm not hopeful it will be different.... just know you aren't alone in your feelings :hugs:

I think our feelings will change once we meet our new little guys though... time heals all...

[NCBeachyGrl]

I am sorry you are having a hard time. I too had bad GD when I found out #3 was a boy. I had a private u/s done without DH knowing and it really helped me wrap my head around it. At the 20 week u/s, we had the tech write it on paper and that was so much better for me than to see BOY written all over the screen. We also had told everyone we weren't finding out so I didn't have to deal with going back and updating everyone. All of that helped me a ton.

But, like everyone else has said, DS3 is just my little angel and my heart and I just love him to pieces.

[hlmcdaniels]

I am sorry you are having a hard time. I too had bad GD when I found out #3 was a boy. I had a private u/s done without DH knowing and it really helped me wrap my head around it. At the 20 week u/s, we had the tech write it on paper and that was so much better for me than to see BOY written all over the screen. We also had told everyone we weren't finding out so I didn't have to deal with going back and updating everyone. All of that helped me a ton.

But, like everyone else has said, DS3 is just my little angel and my heart and I just love him to pieces.

We are actually telling everyone we aren't finding out.. did that help you? and by the time we find out we will be long gone moved out of state which I think will help!

[NCBeachyGrl]

Yes!!! It helped me SO much b/c I didn't have to deal with all the hype and everything. We told everyone we weren't finding out and then we decided to reveal the gender when we were ready. It was x-mas and we ordered a stocking with his name and hung it up on x-mas eve and waited for everyone to notice. Everyone was so shocked we found out and didn't tell that it took away from all the stupid things ppl say.

I can also say that my GD is now 100% gone...for the moment at least. We agreed to go for #4 when I was preggo and we are gearing up now. I don't feel that overwhelming urge to have a DD...I just want another baby. Of course I still want a DD and I know I would be sad if we end up with DS4 but something has changed where I just feel so blessed and having kids is more about my family and not my selfish needs if that makes sense!

Are you stopping at 3 or is there a possibility of a 4th? I swore I only wanted 2kids and here I am going on #4!

[6bluewant1pink]

ladies its a boy:(.. i'm not sure if i'm going to be back, i'm taking the news pretty badly:'(

Aww hugs, you know last week I had hard time after hearing boy but I am doing better now. Hope you get to feeling better soon try shopping for him, that's what has helped me deal I am at a better place now excited to meet my 7th son.

[6bluewant1pink]

I'm so, so sorry you didn't hear girl. I know it's hard right now. As the mom of four boys, #3 was the hardest to hear. I don't know why. But I got through it, and I know you will too. *hugs*

You know what (besides this baby #7)strangely #3 was my hardest to hear too. I remember going home running up the stairs dropping to top step crying so hard upset hitting my belly saying why! Sorry ladies this sound bad I feel bad:oops:. But #3 is my sweetheart he is so caring will give his last to his brothers. I couldn't see life without him.

[Charlee]

please keep me updated.. I could really use a friend going through something similar to me.. it will help

I will definitely keep you updated... I'm going this Friday evening (PST) so it will be late Friday night before I can come update everyone. I just know I'm going to hear BOY though... if you look at my nub thread there is NO mistaking the "frank and beans" haha

I'm starting to feel loads better actually. My DH is already planning on a 4th so I think that helps. I'm not sure if I'm up for the challenge though! I've had a very rough time staying pregnant, so the thought of rolling the dice again seems like insanity!! haha HT is probably not a feasible option for us either... the thought of spending $20,000 to *maybe* get pregnant makes me have chest pains haha

I'm on here almost everyday so just msg me if you need to talk :) It DOES help having a friend going through the same thing... we need all the support we can get!

So where are you all moving to?

[3boys]

Hlmcdaniels, honey you really won't be the only one.... I will be joining you soon too! My sway (if you can even call it that) was rubbish this time. I have no hope lol. You really won't be alone, as unfortunate as it is no due date group gets 100% success!! We will all support each other! And even the women who get their desired gender have most likely been through GD all before and that's why they are here! We are all here for you!! Xxx

[Fae]

I just want to thank you for the perspective. I know you are really struggling right now but some of your thoughts helped me. It is about the bond!!! My DS and I are amazingly close seriously two peas in a pod and he is more than I ever dreamed of. He's so smart it's scary, so funny, so outgoing everyone that meets him falls in love, caring, and waaaaaay to cute dimples huge blue green eyes with lashes that go for miles. I'm expecting ds 2 in October and I do have GD feelings but if he's anything like my son I will be so blessed. I do someday hope to have a girl but really I have nothing to be sad about. The bond with your children is not gender dependent. Thank you for your thoughts. I hope you continue to feel better and better. It seems to come and go but for today I feel ok thank you for that :)

[Fae]

I actually meant to post that in your other thread sorry but I'm sure you know what I'm referring to :)

[hlmcdaniels]

Yes!!! It helped me SO much b/c I didn't have to deal with all the hype and everything. We told everyone we weren't finding out and then we decided to reveal the gender when we were ready. It was x-mas and we ordered a stocking with his name and hung it up on x-mas eve and waited for everyone to notice. Everyone was so shocked we found out and didn't tell that it took away from all the stupid things ppl say.

I can also say that my GD is now 100% gone...for the moment at least. We agreed to go for #4 when I was preggo and we are gearing up now. I don't feel that overwhelming urge to have a DD...I just want another baby. Of course I still want a DD and I know I would be sad if we end up with DS4 but something has changed where I just feel so blessed and having kids is more about my family and not my selfish needs if that makes sense!

Are you stopping at 3 or is there a possibility of a 4th? I swore I only wanted 2kids and here I am going on #4!

We are having an xmas baby so maybe we will reveal babes gender on a pumpkin for Halloween for our friends and family, you inspired me with your holiday idea=] fortunately we have the money to go HT.. i'm just super worried because sadly it will be my 4th c section.. I will try to look into a Vbac but they will not do it here in NJ after 2 c/s.. but I am relocating out of state so I have a small bit of hope that maybe in Florida the laws are different! I sadly would try yet another sway for a girl but I really don't think my husband makes girls(lol) and I couldn't risk my last chance with a 4th c section to NOT have a girl, I think its the only thing keeping me sane right now that it eventually will happen

[hlmcdaniels]

I just want to thank you for the perspective. I know you are really struggling right now but some of your thoughts helped me. It is about the bond!!! My DS and I are amazingly close seriously two peas in a pod and he is more than I ever dreamed of. He's so smart it's scary, so funny, so outgoing everyone that meets him falls in love, caring, and waaaaaay to cute dimples huge blue green eyes with lashes that go for miles. I'm expecting ds 2 in October and I do have GD feelings but if he's anything like my son I will be so blessed. I do someday hope to have a girl but really I have nothing to be sad about. The bond with your children is not gender dependent. Thank you for your thoughts. I hope you continue to feel better and better. It seems to come and go but for today I feel ok thank you for that :)

im so glad I could have helped!!! keep in touch with me so we can get through it together:)!

[hlmcdaniels]

Hlmcdaniels, honey you really won't be the only one.... I will be joining you soon too! My sway (if you can even call it that) was rubbish this time. I have no hope lol. You really won't be alone, as unfortunate as it is no due date group gets 100% success!! We will all support each other! And even the women who get their desired gender have most likely been through GD all before and that's why they are here! We are all here for you!! Xxx

im so glad I have someone else who feels the same way. I don't get it, I guess our husbands just don't make girls LOL.. ( atleast I blame mine ;) )

[hlmcdaniels]

I will definitely keep you updated... I'm going this Friday evening (PST) so it will be late Friday night before I can come update everyone. I just know I'm going to hear BOY though... if you look at my nub thread there is NO mistaking the "frank and beans" haha

I'm starting to feel loads better actually. My DH is already planning on a 4th so I think that helps. I'm not sure if I'm up for the challenge though! I've had a very rough time staying pregnant, so the thought of rolling the dice again seems like insanity!! haha HT is probably not a feasible option for us either... the thought of spending $20,000 to *maybe* get pregnant makes me have chest pains haha

I'm on here almost everyday so just msg me if you need to talk :) It DOES help having a friend going through the same thing... we need all the support we can get!

So where are you all moving to?

Thank you so much that means a lot!! I try to get on almost daily too, its just so hard with the constant sickness this time around, how are you feeling by the way? We are moving to the Orlando Florida area, I am excited and my boys are even more as we will probably be regulars at Disney world;) I just saw we are also due date buddies too!! When would you and your dh try for a 4th? I told my husband I really don't think I can mentally do it for another 3-4 years.. plus the expense I will have to save for a little while as HT is so not cheap:(

[hlmcdaniels]

Aww hugs, you know last week I had hard time after hearing boy but I am doing better now. Hope you get to feeling better soon try shopping for him, that's what has helped me deal I am at a better place now excited to meet my 7th son.

Thank u I am trying to take it day by day, I think I am actually taking better than when I heard DS2 was a boy.. somehow I just knew my destiny would be a (boy) so I kind of expected it. I went and bought ds3 something yesterday and it actually helped a little bit, I will keep shopping though!!

[Lizzie Lizard]

hlmc, I just wanted to say too I was following your story and it is helping me a ton too. I only have 1 boy and am pretty sure I am pregnant with another one (this is my probably my last shot). Just hearing what you went though, seeing how well you are doing has really helped me be more accepting and at peace with it all.

So happy you are already doing better. Thanks for sharing everything. I think the pumpkin idea is precious!!!

[grace03]

aww hun im sorry you didn't hear girl. I didn't have any GD until my 20 week scan of my third pregnancy when I found out it was to be my 3rd boy. I am 13 weeks preg with my 4th and accidental baby and im a wreck about it being another boy even thought I will love him. The positive for you is that you live somewhere where you can go HT if you want I live in Australia and it is illegal. The cost to go to America or Thailand with 3 boys in tow was too great.
hope you can come to terms with bubba boy and my three boys are something special im sure yours wil be too xxx

[hlmcdaniels]

aww hun im sorry you didn't hear girl. I didn't have any GD until my 20 week scan of my third pregnancy when I found out it was to be my 3rd boy. I am 13 weeks preg with my 4th and accidental baby and im a wreck about it being another boy even thought I will love him. The positive for you is that you live somewhere where you can go HT if you want I live in Australia and it is illegal. The cost to go to America or Thailand with 3 boys in tow was too great.
hope you can come to terms with bubba boy and my three boys are something special im sure yours wil be too xxx



Grace I am so sorry I wish HT was possible where you were, my heart really breaks for you, keep us updated as to if you are having a baby girl or boy! do you have a scan soon?

[grace03]

Grace I am so sorry I wish HT was possible where you were, my heart really breaks for you, keep us updated as to if you are having a baby girl or boy! do you have a scan soon?

thanks hlmcdaniels, I can have a private gender scan for 100 dollars in 2 weeks and my 20 week scan is on the 24th of July. its killing me not knowing and thinking it could be a girl is doing more harm than good, but at the same time if I find out its a boy there is no other time ill think maybe its a girl. I am getting tubes tied after this one..... ill keep you updated and my 3rd boy is as beautiful as my first two so I know you will be ok in the meantime and hopefully can get a girl HT in the future xxx