DH not happy :(

[myrainbowgirl]

So, I thought I could convince DH to DTD every 4-6 days (Atomic's suggestion) while TTC, and he initially agreed (our typical frequency is 2-3 days). (He is 38, so no abstain, and FR seems a little difficult to maintain.) However, after I o'd this week (DTD Tues.), he was asking me again today...but according to the 4-6 days, tomorrow will would be the first day we could do it again.

My understanding is that every 4-6 days would be our frequency regardless of the phase of my cycle...but is that the case? Could we go back to every 3 days (think DH will be ok with this) until around O...then abstain the 4-6?

Or should I forget it all and just do compressed FR to keep DH happy? I even tried to bribe him with spicing things up. Apparently, quantity over quality is his preference. :(

Thoughts/advice?

[missmegrn]

Honestly, if it were me, I would just do it and adjust my time accordingly, since you have already ovulated. I am not swaying girl so I don't know the plan for swaying girl, so I don't want to ruin your sway. I do know that in my household, when DH is not happy, he tends to make everyone else feel the same. Your dh might even look at it as you are willing to make rules to ttc, but you aren't willing to take his feelings/needs into account either, if that makes any sense. GL to you.

[atomic sagebrush]

Cardinal rule of swaying - if daddy ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Yes, PLEASE go back to the every 3 days or so frequency. I think frequency barely sways at all anyway, so as long as you are sticking with the one attempt it's all good. Every 2-3 days, every 4-6 days, no worries, just stick with the one unprotected attempt.

I personally have found that husbands end up hating the compressed FR just as much and then all too often end up unable to complete the transaction when it's time, so I would not have you switch to that.

[atomic sagebrush]

Honestly, if it were me, I would just do it and adjust my time accordingly, since you have already ovulated. I am not swaying girl so I don't know the plan for swaying girl, so I don't want to ruin your sway. I do know that in my household, when DH is not happy, he tends to make everyone else feel the same. Your dh might even look at it as you are willing to make rules to ttc, but you aren't willing to take his feelings/needs into account either, if that makes any sense. GL to you.

:bowdown: Exactly!! And it's for something that almost certainly barely sways (if it even does!!) Pick your battles with DH, it just isn't worth it because there have been people who had their husbands wear a jock for 6 weeks and abstain for 21 days and still got boys!!

[missmegrn]

Unless you have figured out a way to procreate on your own, keeping dh happy and his feelings taken into consideration, are very important to your sway and marriage. One extra day here or there shouldnt make a differance. You are lucky to have a dh that is on board with ttc another and swaying to do so. Basically do what you can to make him happy before he puts a kibosh on ttc another baby.

[myrainbowgirl]

After posting this last night, I actually came to the same conclusion myself. I was hearing Atomic's words about daddy not being happy, nobody is! So, I talked to him this morning about it & told him we were fine to go back to our regular frequency, but then around O stretch it out a little. He was good with that! So yay! And thanks for your advice!