Not getting pregnant-please help!

[lovemysonbut]

Hello,

I would REALLY love a girl since this will be my last baby, but most of all I just want another healthy baby, as close as possible in age to my son/ I always wanted a 2 year age gap, which I would have had, but I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks in December and have been unable to conceive since. I'm not sure if it's because of the d &c, or because of swaying, but I got pregnant the first month twice, so this is highly unusual for me. I have been following the diet for 6 moths and am so depressed-it is not fun, and I have missed a ton of social events because I can't eat. I am also destroying my body and health with allt his aspartame, lack of protein and fruits and vegs. I had a blood test last week and my potassium is quite low.
Could the refresh and cutt off stop me from getting pregnant? Has anyone else had this problem? Should I switch to summers eve? Is it as effective? Can either of these prevent pregnancy? Could vitex be preventing pregnancy? I've been taking it af-o then stopping....I o after day 30 without it and around day 21 with it...
My periods have been VERY light since hte d &c...this could be the problem too. Has anyone had a d & c, and had this happen (or not?)
Thannks for any help. My due date is this week and I can't believe I'm not pregnant again yet. Should I try frequent bd through o? Has anyone else done this and had pink?
THANKS!

[Dreamofpink]

I didn't want to read and run but am on my phone so can't answer as fully as I'd like to. Please please drop the cut off!! It stopped me conceiving for a year and doesn't sway anyway. Keep the diet, it's the best thing in a pink sway. Hopefully others including Atomic can give you some more advice. Why don't you come on over to the longtermers thread too? Sorry I can't post a link from my phone. Hang in there, you've certainly had a rough time of it. We'll help as much as we can and support you all the way. :)

Sent from my LG-E400 using Tapatalk 2

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks so much for your reply!!!! It's SO HARD to stick to the diet after 6 months! I want to eat meat for bbq season! EVERYTHING has salt in it. I love fresh fruit and vegetables. I am SO sick of this diet after 6 months. I also LOVE coffee and get headaches when I give it up!!!! I only drink one or two cups in the morning but that and wine are the only thing keeping me sane during my supposed to be due date week after 6 months off ttc and swaying:) How bad are coffee and alcohol for ttc girl?\
THANKS FOR ANSWERING ME! YOU MADE MY DAY!

[Dreamofpink]

Thanks so much for your reply!!!! It's SO HARD to stick to the diet after 6 months! I want to eat meat for bbq season! EVERYTHING has salt in it. I love fresh fruit and vegetables. I am SO sick of this diet after 6 months. I also LOVE coffee and get headaches when I give it up!!!! I only drink one or two cups in the morning but that and wine are the only thing keeping me sane during my supposed to be due date week after 6 months off ttc and swaying:) How bad are coffee and alcohol for ttc girl?\
THANKS FOR ANSWERING ME! YOU MADE MY DAY!

I completely understand where you're coming from. I did the LE diet for 8 months and prior to that I did the IG diet for another 8 months. I dropped that before dropping the cut-off 4 months later when I discovered this fab website. (see my siggie for details :sigh:) I know it's not easy missing out on meat, but it's so much easier to have a normal veggie lifestyle with the LE diet. You can eat as much fruit & veg as you like, just stick to the lower nutrient ones and don't snack. With most fruits you need to count cals but not with most veg. I ate loads of cauliflower, green beans, courgettes & cuccumber when swaying. I also ate veggie burgers (made with veg not soya) and veggie pizzas. Low-fat food ranges like Weight Watchers were a God-send.

I'll let you into a little secret, alcohol is thought to be good for a pink sway! :holysheep: No seriously, just as long as you keep it within your daily limits, it's great for declining the maternal condition. Red wine isn't so great though as it's full of anti-oxidants etc. Coffee is also fine, although I think you may have to consider what you put in it, I'm not sure as I just can't stand the stuff so didn't factor it into my sway. Diet pop is also very good, as is sugar-free gum.

It's entirely up to you, but you don't have to worry at all about counting salt within your limits. I started off like that, being influenced by my IG-swaying days, but gave up a few months in. It made everything sooo much easier! Atomic believes that it doesn't sway and I really think that's the case too. It's just impossible to avoid it in most cultures and features in a lot of cuisines!

I'm so sorry for your loss, it must have been a horrible time for you and now especially as you get closer to your due date. :hugs: I can't help you very much with the Vitex or Rephresh questions as I didn't use either. You may want to drop Vitex, although I'm sure someone will be able to help you with that a bit better then me. Personally going with my gut instinct, I'd advise you to drop the Vitex and Rephresh first before trying frequent BD through O, as one attempt at opk+ sways harder. Hopefully someone more knowledgeable than me will chime in to help you there.

Here's some links to help you:

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-conceive-girl/23588-ttc-girl-library.html

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-girl-best-practices/1094-vitex-faq-share-your-experiences-here.html

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-girl-best-practices/1066-complete-guide-replens-rephresh.html

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-girl/27941-ttc-girl-2013-long-termers-thread.html
(Long-termers thread)

I noticed that you're not a Dream member so you may not be able to access some of these links. I highly recommend joining as a member as it's only $12 for a year and is excellent value for money. (You can pay by Paypal, which is easy :)) I ummed and ahhed at first, but took the plunge and am soooo grateful that I did. The support and wealth of knowledge is invaluable and the ladies on here are so non-judgemental. They've helped to carry me through some dark days when I thought it would never happen and are wonderful when it comes to understanding & empathising with our gender desire. As I haven't found out the gender of this baby yet, I may have a few more ahead of me too, but I know that they'll be there for me either way.

You're very welcome here and I hope you find all the information you need. :bighug:

[luckylass]

I am by no means an expert and I didn't get to really start the diet or take vitex Or any of those before getting my bfp as I got it the month I found this site but I just wanted to let you know I got pregnant after two d&c 's and have a beautiful and healthy little boy after the first one and a beautiful healthy baby girl after the second. I conceived my girl with frequent bd through o and this month last year too. I am really sorry for your loss but please God this will be your month. Will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you and best of luck. Just wanted to let you know it's possible. :)

[Emily]

Yes drop the cut off. BD once when you get OPK+. I ant sure whether rephresh actually helps sway or not - I used it as I had some from my initial 'sway shopping spree' but I am not convinced it helps. Perhaps check your ph and see if you think you need it. I found dream membership really helpful too. I took a while to join as I hadn't told DH I had decided on a third and wanted it to seem like a joint decision LOL! The details on PayPal or bank account don't say anything obvious like gender dreaming - just something general about babies I think.

Gin and slimline tonic is great for a pink sway and for your sanity!

[atomic sagebrush]

Having trouble getting pg after a miscarriage is not unusual, but I do think they should do a check of your thyroid just to be on the safe side.

You need to tell me more about your diet. Fruits and veg are 100% allowed on LE Diet and you can literally DIE from not having enough potassium. Some fruits and veg are allowed on IG Diet. There is NO diet where you can't ahve any fruit or veg. You MUST be eating 2500-3500 mg potassium for your health and it is very dangerous for someone who is low in potassium to be avoiding fruit and veg.

Aspartame should be no more than 2-3 servings a day maximum. If you have been using more than that, drop it all together and do not use it again.

YES both cutoff and RepHresh can reduce odds of conception. Drop cutoff immediately and go for one attempt at positive OPK (the day before you expect to ovulate). Timing does NOT sway and we have gotten better results both in terms of getting pregnant, and also more girls conceived, by DTD one time at positive OPK. Then, you can use your last batch of RepHresh 24 hours before you expect to attempt (give or take, this is not an exact thing) and this should really help. If you don't get pg after 1-2 months with that, then drop the RepHresh, I just don't want to see you drop everything.

DO NOT switch to Summers Eve. That's WORSE.

Vitex can cause light periods and some people have had trouble geting pregnant while taking it. I do not recommend people using vitex after a loss until they're sure their cycles are back to normal. After 6 months on vitex it's time for a break anyway.

I would not recommend frequent BD through

Re diet and supps, I want you to add in one full fat yogurt a day, a coconut water every day, 4 eggs a week, shellfish twice a week, a zinc 8-15 mg taken every other day, iron 18-30 mg taken 3 days a week, and if you aren't already taking 1600 mcg folic acid, DO. Be sure you are using iodized salt or start taking an iodine supplement 150 IU.

PLEASE take this very seriously you are going to KILL yourself eating the way that you are. This is not the LE Diet and if you are doing IG Diet, you are not supposed to do that for longer than 6 months anyway.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much for your reply!!!! It's SO HARD to stick to the diet after 6 months! I want to eat meat for bbq season! EVERYTHING has salt in it. I love fresh fruit and vegetables. I am SO sick of this diet after 6 months. I also LOVE coffee and get headaches when I give it up!!!! I only drink one or two cups in the morning but that and wine are the only thing keeping me sane during my supposed to be due date week after 6 months off ttc and swaying:) How bad are coffee and alcohol for ttc girl?\
THANKS FOR ANSWERING ME! YOU MADE MY DAY!

Coffee and alcohol are allowed on LE Diet and wine may be a source of potassium you desperately need.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much for your reply!!!! It's SO HARD to stick to the diet after 6 months! I want to eat meat for bbq season! EVERYTHING has salt in it. I love fresh fruit and vegetables. I am SO sick of this diet after 6 months. I also LOVE coffee and get headaches when I give it up!!!! I only drink one or two cups in the morning but that and wine are the only thing keeping me sane during my supposed to be due date week after 6 months off ttc and swaying:) How bad are coffee and alcohol for ttc girl?\
THANKS FOR ANSWERING ME! YOU MADE MY DAY!

I don't even think salt sways blue. I got my DD eating tons of it as was my husband, after a failed sway where I was limiting sodium. Makes it way easier to stick to the rest of the diet.

[cape grace]

Hi. Firstly..i am so sorry for your loss..
I swayed for a year...in the middle of it i got preg but lost it at 12 weeks too and after my d&c did not get preg..i had to go on clomid!! I think for me i was very thin from the diet and my hormones were effected from the miscarriage so it wasnt happening without the push from clomid...i ended up getting preg second round on it.
In terms of diet...i ate ONLY fruit and veg with rice or noodles or pasta..i never had breakfast and if i did have a snack i ate choc rice cakes. i followed the ig veg diet in some way like i avoided potatoes (in ireland :-) )and just ate lots if salad..the diet was tough esp as time went by!! At the end i added in more bread scones and an egg or two to help me get preg...i just needed to get on with it! I dont know if my baby is a boy or girl so cant give you any more advise! Hope it helps to know you are not alone and a trip to your doc might be worth it! I found just by telling my doc that i had not ovulated since my miscarriage was was enough to get the clomid..but i prob needed it too at that point!

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks for all your answers and support! I really want a girl, but I want a sibiling for my son more than anything!!!!!!!! I can'[t believe how far apart they're going to be now. I never thought of vitex causing light periods....I thought is HELPED getting pregnant, not hindered it! I hope that's it....vitex does make me o consistently and way earlier, on day 21 instead of day 30 +!!!!
Something is definitely off with my hormones, I made no breastmilk depsite crazy efforts, herbs and drugs (less than 5 oz a day!) and didn't get my first post parturm period until my son was 14 months old.

[gurly]

I agree about the cut off. When I conceived my daughter, I was right on ovulation. I'm certainly no expert on swaying, but I can tell you that I would not have gotten pregnant had I done the cut off. You've worked so hard for this sway I hope it works out for you

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks so much:) Today is my due date for my missed miscarriage and it's been a rough 7 months, but today is worse. To make matters worse, I have been going to a fertility clinic for the past week, which takes 2 hours of my day with my 2 year old son, have to get a blood test and vaginal ultrasound everyday which is intrusive. I got pregnant twice the first two times-I don't get it...Refresh is getting expensive too. I think this will be my last cycle swaying because it is taking over my life- I miss social events and bbqs and can''t eat watermelon or meat in the summer. I also just want another baby to help heal the pain of the miscarriage.
My question now is with timing. Atomic was super helpful and told me to bd once at positive opk, but for the past 5 days the fertility clinic has told me I will ovulatie "soon". On friday, they said 2 to 3 days, and saturday they said I was really close. Yesterday was my husband's birthday and I thought I might o today, so we bd. I had abstained for a couple of weeks, ut he releases almost everyday. Today, the clinic said I'll probably o in a couple of days, my body's ready but just hanging on and there's no surge yet.
Where do I go from here? It's too late to do one attempt at +opk annd ttoo late to do frequent bd through o, and scared to do cut off because this swaying diet, depression from miscarriage, and dragging my son to fertility appointments everyday is KILLING me.What's my best girl chance for this cycle, knowing that I bd once 3 to 4 days before o and want to get pregnant?
Also, confused about whether to take cal/mag. I swayed with my son and did (and it failed obviously) and I've heard that they're alkaline. I know at least 15 friends and family members who have had girls in the past few years and NONE of them skip breakfast, tehy all HATE diet soda and artificial sweeteners and eat quite a bit. The only thing I can see that they all have in common is that none of them exercice (I do, and was doing a weight lifting class 4 times a week when I conceived my son), they don't drink coffee or alcohol and 3 of them are vegetarians....
I am a size 4 and don't ahve a lot of weight to lose, so have just been focusing on eating twice a day, no snacking instead of losing weight. I;m taking acidophilius, aspirin, cal/mag (on the fence about this one), vitex and vitamin c as well as drinking TONS of CL and usinng refresh (but thinking of dropping because it's becoming expensive). Can I drink diet pop?
THANKS FOR LISTENING and for your replies:) The miscarriage and resulting infertility (possibly because of swaying) has made gender less important, but I've been doing this since December, so it seems silly to give up now and I cry everytime I find out someone I know is having a girl (and EVERYONE I know has had one or two-no BOYS-I should bottle up whatever they have and give it to everyone here-I give out pink dust to everyone but me:)

[lovemysonbut]

one more thing...I'm out of refresh,...I used the last of it on Saturday when I thought I would o soon. I really don't want to spend more, but may not be able to do the right bd patterns, and the supps didn't do anything for me when I got my son so after months of hard work, I want the best chance. Lime seems cheaper...shoud I try that? I have a summer's eve douche bottle I couold use. Do I just buy a lime and add water? I know there are instructions but it's ambiguous to me....also, any tips on getting my ph strips to change colour? they always stay yellow no matter what...

[*ruby*]

It took me a while after my d&c to get pregnant again as well, after falling 1st time in the previous 3 pregnancies. In the end it was the month I stopped the repHresh that I got my current BFP, I don't know if it's a coincidence but it's how it worked for me (I'd also stopped supps a few months prior).

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks so much! As much as I want a girl, I just want my son to have a sibling.....I will stop refresh. I've spent a couple hundred $ on it anyway:) Any advice on bd timing knowing that I bd on 0-4, 0-3 (probably) only and haven't been getting pg with cut offs. Does timing really matter? I've read both and I ahve read the articles about how it DOESN'T. Any advice on getting over mc?

[The Anchor]

After 3 one-hit-wonders, I lost the 3rd at 12 weeks. It was devastating, but I hopped right back on the wagon. I have been TTC (no gender preference) since October 2012. Nobody can figure out why I haven't conceived yet. I've been pregnant 3 times in 5 years...why am I having such a hard time this time? And the worst part is, I kinda had it in my head that conceiving would help me get over the m/c (which I feel like I never really mourned), and the longer I don't get pg the more the m/c sits like a huge boulder on my shoulders.

I am so so sorry for your loss. I wish I could help you with advice on getting over m/c, but I haven't gotten over it myself it appears. Good luck and HUGS to you.

[Leebug]

Oh, so sorry. I understand completely!! I was on the IG site trying for blue.I did everything humanly possible to get a little boy.After 13 months of not conceiving AT ALL i had a huge meltdown.I decided, like you, that a sibling of any gender and a healthy baby was FAR more important than my wish for blue.So this is what worked for me, hope it will work for you.

Took a prenatal, Femaprin (this is vitex and b6), baby aspirin, omega 3
used preseed
for dd#1 i didn't know it swayed but i ate very girlie.low cal diet, loads of cranberry juice, fat free dairy stuff like that.I would stay on the girl diet.
I would DTD everyday maybe a week before ovulation day.
DESTRESS!!!!!!!! Take a step back, take some deep breaths and start over.Do some stretching, take ds for walks, make yourself HAPPY again and EXCITED to be trying for another baby! I also highly recommend acupuncture.worked 2 out of the 3 times i was trying to conceive.u don't need everyday, just a couple times a week before O and in the 2 week wait.I know some of the supplements sway blue BUT i had 2 girls doing this so u never know.Hope you feel better soon and know that you are not alone!!

[atomic sagebrush]

longer post:

1)Drop the RepHresh. We haven't gotten super awesome results with it and it does lower odds of conception.

2)I cringe when I see people doing a really strict sway and then doing a complete 180 and dropping everythign. You can drop SOME things and still have a fine sway. you can even relax on diet without throwing it all out the window - you've already come this far, to let it all go now, I just think is a step in the wrong direction. People have the mistaken impression that if they can't do everyhting, they may as well not do anything, and that couldn't be further from the truth. It's a radio dial, not a light switch, and I reaally urge you read this thread for a full explanation http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/25293-three-essays-swaying.html

3)BD again. 2 attempts wasn't that much worse than 1 attempt and it's likely that the swimmers from the first attempt will be dead and gone by then anyway leaving you with pretty much one attempt anyway.

4)I got my girl without cal-mag after a failed sway for DS 4 where I was taking tons of the stuff. I will always come down against cal-mag because the evidence doesn't support it, but that's up to each individual to make that choice.

5)Re your family and friends etc, please understand that NONE of these things are magic bullets that are going to work for eveyrone all the time. Even the best of sways probably only work about 75-80% of the time - and that's A LOT of opposites. If it was as easy as skipping breakfast to get a girl, the whole human race would have died out a long time ago. These are just tactics that may help a bit, there are no magic bullets.

Shorter post -

I think you should just drop RepHresh. Anyone who is havign trouble getting pg, the jellies need to go sooner rather than later. To hang onto jelly when you're considering dropping diet is jsut not the right move to make IMO.

I BEG you not to do lime or to do douche. It's even worse for conception than the jellies are.

My advice is to give your pH strips to your kids to play with. pH of 6 was shown to yield NO motile sperm in the cervix. no X, no Y. So to try and get your pH to 4-5 range like they say on IG is a recipe for infertility. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/11684-ph-pickle.html

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much! As much as I want a girl, I just want my son to have a sibling.....I will stop refresh. I've spent a couple hundred $ on it anyway:) Any advice on bd timing knowing that I bd on 0-4, 0-3 (probably) only and haven't been getting pg with cut offs. Does timing really matter? I've read both and I ahve read the articles about how it DOESN'T. Any advice on getting over mc?

Timing doesn't sway. I'm assuming you have read this but just in case http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/7691-trouble-timing.html

Anyone who is having trouble getting pg, it's just like with the jellies - please don't drop diet and keep timing!!!!

I got my girl with Shettles boy timing after getting 3 of my 4 boys BD 2-4 days before ovulation

[atomic sagebrush]

please do not BD every day for weeks before ovulation for anyone having trouble getting pg, not only is it more than one attempt, but your husband's sperm count will be sorely depleted by the time O rolls around and you are actually less likely to get pg from sex every day.

[Leebug]

oh yes, i certainly didn't mean for "weeks". :happy:

[atomic sagebrush]

Even A week before may deplete some guys' sperm count too far to conceive.

[Dreamofpink]

Even A week before may deplete some guys' sperm count too far to conceive.

It did for my Dh & he's only 31, fit & healthy!

Sent from my LG-E400 using Tapatalk 2

[Leebug]

It didn't for us! Took us only 3 months to get pg with dd#1 & I have issues.dh was 32 @ the time.everyones different I guess.what works for some doesn't work for others.if every other day gives u the best chances go for it! Do what feels best for u!

[Dreamofpink]

It did for my Dh & he's only 31, fit & healthy!

Sent from my LG-E400 using Tapatalk 2

Sorry, I meant FR for a week before ov was too much for my DH :)

Sent from my LG-E400 using Tapatalk 2

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks everyone! 8 months now of ttc ....I thoght thtat last cycle might be the one, but it wasn't:( I'm not sure if it's swaying that's killing my conception chance or something related to my d & c. I'm going to stop vitex and refresh this month. The fertility clinic really wants me to dtd every second day and I don't know what to tell them why I can't....any ideas or should I just dtd every second day even though that is boy timing? I really can't believe it's been 8 months of ttc when I got pg twice on the first try before. Also my luteal phase is 11 days...could this be the issue?

[atomic sagebrush]

If you haven't tried without vitex and especially RepHresh, then you haven't ~really~ tried. I BEG you to try at least one month with one attempt, without RepHresh. One attempt has given way better results for girls than RepHresh + several attempts.

The fertility clinic does not need to know how many attempts you guys did.

Luteal phase of 11 days is not perfect but it's still adequate to get pg.

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks!!!!!! That's awesome advice! IF the one attempt is on o, is that okay? I'll aim for + opk, but if I miss it for some reason can I do this? I'm going to do aspirin, acidophilius, possibly replens (but maybe not, undecided), crystal light, skip breakfast, limit caffeine (1 coffee or less per day) and not much else this month. Next month, they're going to start me on clomid so this will be my last natural cycle. IT's just so odd to me since I had no issues before and got pregnant so easily twice. THANKS SO MUCH for listening and helping. I'd rather a boy than no baby and month after month of not eating and heartache. Does anyone have kids 3 years apart and like the age gap? I always wanted 2 years apart and am sad that it's approaching 3, but maybe it will be even better.
One final question-I LOVE fruits and veggies-peaches, plums, berries, cucumbers, spinach, peppers, corn and kale. Will this ruin my sway? I'll eat them with meals so I'm not snacking:) I've avoided them for too long and am worried about my health. I'll avoid potatos, tomatos , watermelon (so sad to miss all those in summer,) and bananas.

[atomic sagebrush]

Still ok if it's early on O day. The swimmers need time to get where they need to go, and waiting till late on O day is too late.

Please drop the acidophilus, we have gotten terrible results with that. One of the few things that was lower than 50-50!!

Low carb veg is free on LE Diet - you can literally have as much as you want without needing to count anything.

High carb veg and fruits you can have, you need to count calories and not protein or fat in those.

High protein veg aka beans, peas, legumes then count cals and protein, they have no fat.

Of course if you have the option between a more nutritious and less nutritious one, pick the less nutritious one, but you can still have the more nutritious ones!

You can have potatoes, tomatoes, watermelon, and bananas on LE Diet. The ONLY reason those were ever considered "forbidden foods" is because on IGD/FGD, they are inhaling tons of dairy which has gobs and gobs of potassium in it, while trying to limit potassium overall (makes no sense but whatever!) So they felt like they had to completely avoid foods that had potassium in them because they were getting so much thru dairy. In LE Diet, we don't do all that dairy and if we don't include the potassium-rich plant foods, we are at very great risk of not getting ENOUGH. You must get 2500-3500 mg potassium a day or you can DIE. this is the same amount recommended by IGD/FGD, you are not harming your sway in any way. I do not think potassium even sways blue anyway, but for those who do, it's the same recommendation for all three diets - you are not harming your sway with LE Diet by eating potassium foods, because you are not getting that potassium from dairy like IG/French dieters do.

[lovemysonbut]

You are AWESOME! Thanks for your knowledge and for taking the time to reply!

[lovemysonbut]

HEllo,
I just got a negative pregnancy test result from the fertility clinic. I am SO depressed. It has no been 9 months since my D & c ( started TTC ritght away after) and 9 months of eating only swiss cheese (high cal, low mag), low sodium triscuits, no fruit and veg, no breakfast and TONS of crystal light. I have avoided social events with food, and can't see most of my friends because most have newborns or are pregnant.
I got pregnant twice the first month so I am so frustrated. I'm pushing a 3 year age gap with my son and am so sad he won't have a sibling close in age. I really don't understand what's going wrong.
I had a short luteal phase and progesterone issues so the clinic put me on suppositories so I really thought this would be my month.... at least I'm getting clomid next month so I can avoid another 38 day cycle:)
I dropped the refresh, I dropped the timing (bd on o day the last 4 cycles). What else should I keep/drop? Next month, I'll only be on baby aspirin and clomid (I took cal/mag with my son and hae read that it's alkalinizing so I'm avoiding it). Thanks for listening and any help offered)
PS. I just started zoloft today because I can't take this anymore.....does this sway? What should be my bd plan next month?

[atomic sagebrush]

Ok first of all let's talk about diet. 9 months of eating that diet is going to render you pretty much infertile and that needs to change, like yesterday. Here is a link to the short version of LE Diet. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-conceive-girl/16780-low-everything-diet-nutshell-version.html

And LE Diet FAQ here http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-conceive-girl/24628-le-diet-faq.html

What you are eating is NOT LE Diet, that is starvation, and when your body thinks you are starving it shuts down the baby-making factory in order to focus on your own survival and the kiddo you already have.

Zoloft does sway pink.

Personally I would have you do whatever it takes to get BFP right away up to and including SMEP, preseed, Robi/Muci, anything!! This cannot go on any longer, you're going to kill yourself eating like that.

Since I suspect you won't follow that advice ;), I recommend having your husband do regular release every 2-4 days and then going for one attempt at positive OPK. If you have no CM, please use some Preseed. I recommend a full fat yogurt and a coconut water every single day and you need to readd in fruit and veg and make sure you are hitting those LE totals - the minimums are JUST as important as the limits, if not more so.

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks!!! I will stop the diet, I promise. It' making me crazy and making those bfn even harder, knowing I have to diet again!!! Maybe the're causing the bfns, I've always gotten pregnant easily before, so it could be caused by diet, refresh (I've already dropped it) and timing (already dropped)I was kind of combining IG and low everything, so mostly eating calcium/dairy products and low sodium/potassium (which discludes almost EVERYTHING!). This month, I'm adding clomid and zoloft, taking baby aspirin, one attempt at HCG trigger shot (should be around + OPK I think), skipping breakfast, and eating twice a meal, no snacks, but not worrying too much about specific foods. How does that sound? Anything else I should add/take away?
THANKS for your continued support! This has made the gender thing less important to me:)

[lovemysonbut]

Does a hcg trigger shot sway? If I bd once at +opk should I dry up cm or will the clomid do that?
I have been avoiding restaurants for the past 9 months but have hundreds of coupons from my entertainment book to use before they expire next month. I know there's a lot of calories, salt and fat in restaurant food. If I eat twice a day with no snacking and light lunch, should I be okay to eat pizza, burritos, or other fast or restaurant food twice a week? I love the indian buffet too and have coupons for this....is that okay once a week before o?

[lovemysonbut]

I also just want to clarify why my diet was so restrictive. I swayed with ig with my son (it obviously didn't work) so I have that diet in my head and have been having a hard time letting go. I have still been obsessed with low potassium, sodium and high cal/mag. It's nearly impossible to find low sodium foods, especially ones that are high in calcium. Swiss cheese seems to be an exception so I've been eatig tons of it with low sodium crackers but htat and plain ric with swiss cheese has been almost my exclusive diet along with yogurt and crystal light. I have been adding smoothies lately made with cranberry juice, kefir, arugula, frozen cranberrries and berries. It's actually delicious and high in calcium.
I find it SO hard to eat anything and stick to the sodium levels and get enough calcium while restricting calories.
How much is a persolized sway plan and is it worth getting at this point when I o in two weeks (probably, I start clomid tomorrow). Also, I've spent close to $1000 on refresh, opks, cl, and special groceries just for me. If I buy a plan do I have to make specific meals on it?
I also cheated bigtime during the 2ww eating everything in sight, but I've been so restrictive since December that hopefully this won't matter. I don't want to skip another month, considering the struggle I've been having.
Thanks:)

[atomic sagebrush]

combining IG and LE made a diet that was dangerously restrictive and I no longer recommend even trying it. Do one or the other, because both will drive ya barmy.

AFAIK the trigger shot does not sway (barring any new info of course) .

Do NOT do anythign to dry up CM on Clomid.

Yes you can eat out a couple times a week, stay vegetarian and don't go completely hog-wild!! may help reduce your T levels and help you let go of control a little bit - that can help a pink sway

[lovemysonbut]

Awesome! Thanks!!! I cheated a lot already and feel much better. The iet WAS driving me batty! EVERYTHING has sodium in it and I was avoiding meat, potatoes, veg and fruit. I'm about to take my first clomid pill. I also found out today I have hypothyroid (very mild) and will be starting levothyroxine. Funny because I'm less than a size 2 and have been losing weight. Maybe this will help me not gain when I'm adding foods:) I'm going to do one attempt at trigger shot:)

[atomic sagebrush]

I also just want to clarify why my diet was so restrictive. I swayed with ig with my son (it obviously didn't work) so I have that diet in my head and have been having a hard time letting go. I have still been obsessed with low potassium, sodium and high cal/mag. It's nearly impossible to find low sodium foods, especially ones that are high in calcium. Swiss cheese seems to be an exception so I've been eatig tons of it with low sodium crackers but htat and plain ric with swiss cheese has been almost my exclusive diet along with yogurt and crystal light. I have been adding smoothies lately made with cranberry juice, kefir, arugula, frozen cranberrries and berries. It's actually delicious and high in calcium.
I find it SO hard to eat anything and stick to the sodium levels and get enough calcium while restricting calories.
How much is a persolized sway plan and is it worth getting at this point when I o in two weeks (probably, I start clomid tomorrow). Also, I've spent close to $1000 on refresh, opks, cl, and special groceries just for me. If I buy a plan do I have to make specific meals on it?
I also cheated bigtime during the 2ww eating everything in sight, but I've been so restrictive since December that hopefully this won't matter. I don't want to skip another month, considering the struggle I've been having.
Thanks:)

Oh somehow I missed this the first time and only replied to your other post.

I understand what you're saying and agree thatyou should not be skipping months at all.

but want to clarify a bit for anyone else.

The potassium levels on IGm, FGD, and LE are all the same. it's the minimum amount for health, 2500-3500 mg potassium (you can have more on LE but it's pretty hard because of the cal/pro restrictions). If you go below that, you risk DEATH (not exaggerating!) On IGD/FGD, they eat tons of dairy which has tons of potassium in it (and they are not limiting cals or protein so they can do that, so they then limit fruit/veg because they're trying to limit potassium.

Whereas on LE Diet, there IS no potassium limit, but you have to work to get enough potassium because the diet itself is soemwhat limiting. you can't get much (enough) potassium from dairy or meats because of the restrictions, so you HAVE to then eat fruit/veg taht are rich in potassium, in order to get enough. I ate potato pretty much every day when I got my DD!

People can't try to combine the diets and do both the dairy restriction from LE and also avoid the no-no foods from IG/FGD. It doesn't work. you can't get enough potassium doing both diets and you can make yourself very sick.

Sodium works a little bit differently because it is possible to limit sodium on LE Diet. I don't think it's necessary, but I keep it in the mix for those that want to do it. It makes it much easier to do LE if you drop that. And I think that for anyone who has thyroid stuff going on, you need to eat a good amount of iodized salt or discuss with your doctor about an iodine supplement. It may even be that restricting sodium and thus iodine, for so long has contributed to causing this thyroid issue.

Seriously, the idea underlying all this sodium/potassium jazz is SO DUMB. It's based on some animals that are so far removed from humans that they don't even reproduce in the same way and can actually switch genders from males to females. It doesn't even work biologically. The diets may sway but it's because the pink diets are restrictive and the blue diets have a lot of fruits and veg and red meat in them.

Re the plans, I can always do a plan for anyone whether they've got 2 weeks or 2 years before TTC. The money is always appreciated because it helps keep the site going and enables me to do this as a full time job rather than having to go to work and I would no longer be able to answer q's.

You don't need to make meals, the custom plans don't include diets (there are the 21 day diet books that have that kind of info in them) but the plans have 6months of one on one coaching and I help you with diet in an ongoing fashion as your "coach".

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks! I just saw this. I should o on Monday or Tuesday if the clomid works (normally o after day 24 or so, but hoping for CD 14 with clomid).
All I have left is skipping breakfast, one attempt at +OPK (need to make sure I don[t miss o, the clinic won't tell me when they see the surge and don't know when I will o, just after that the egg is gone), pretty much veg diet. Can I take aspirin with clomid or anything else? Should I bd more than once?I'm keeping coffee (1/day) for my sanity. Also, taking zoloft and hypothyroid meds. Is there anything else I can do? I've invested hundreds of $ into this, and months of effort so it would be too bad to fail now.
If I don't get pg this month, I'll buy a personalized plan for next month, but it's not worth it for 4 days! I won't cheat as much during the 2ww this time:) THANKS FOR YOUR HELP!

[atomic sagebrush]

YOu can take aspirin with Clomid but not with thyroid stuff. The Zoloft can be a blood thinner

I do think that one attempt is the best sway, but if you're ready to get pg NOW then you should always do more than one attempt. Best sway = one attempt, better odds of conception 3-5 attempts in fertile window or SMEP.

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks. A|t this point, I think I just need to get pg. I can't keep this up and the age gap is widening every month. It's too bad that I can't take aspirin.....is there anything else I can do other than clomid and diet? What's the best swaying pattern with more than one attempt? |Does it even matter? I've read so much the timing and bd patterns matter, and I've also read the opposite!

[rainbowflower]

Thanks. A|t this point, I think I just need to get pg. I can't keep this up and the age gap is widening every month. It's too bad that I can't take aspirin.....is there anything else I can do other than clomid and diet? What's the best swaying pattern with more than one attempt? |Does it even matter? I've read so much the timing and bd patterns matter, and I've also read the opposite!

if you were to do, say, 2 attempts... I'd personally do CFR on two days in a row, or with a 1-day gap in between (if you know when you will OV) - so on each attempt day I'd release and discard then DTD within 6 hours. OR if you are doing FR you could just BD and FR on alternate days

The other option is to take something that will improve uterine lining and make implantation easier, such as omega 3 or to help more swimmers get there by using a lube for your attempt. Your body condition would already be swaying pink, but you'd get more swimmers up there in order to try and fertilise the egg

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks so much! I'm just afraid that with fr or one attempt I won't get pregnant and after 9 months and all my mom friends having their second babies, I just want to get pregnant! I got pg from one attempt with #2 (the missed mc at 12 weeks), but haven't since. I'm afraid if I have a boy though I will experience the severe gender disappointment I had with my (AMAZING) son. I really want a daughter but don't know how many more BFN I can take.
ATomic, if I don't get pg this cycle. I'm going to get a custom plan. I owe you big time. I would have done that orginally but I thought I would get pg right away like I did the first two times!

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks. A|t this point, I think I just need to get pg. I can't keep this up and the age gap is widening every month. It's too bad that I can't take aspirin.....is there anything else I can do other than clomid and diet? What's the best swaying pattern with more than one attempt? |Does it even matter? I've read so much the timing and bd patterns matter, and I've also read the opposite!


clomid and diet are so much better than the other stuff aspirin included, that's like saying, "isn't there anything I can do aside from antibiotics, maybe the doctor can bleed me with leeches LOL". :) If you've been TTC 9 months then it's no longer a matter of doing EVERYthing, it's a matter of doing the RIGHT things and waving the rest of it buh-bye because it is only standing in your way of conceiving. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/25293-three-essays-swaying.html

The frequency patterns, I believe, barely sway (and timing totally does not sway). The one attempt DOES sway. So i would very happily see you drop the frequency in favor of one attempt + Preseed, or go with SMEP.

When you read stuff on the boards, please keep in mind that I address lots of different topics for general info purposes - it doesn't ever mean that anyone's sway will rise or fall on the basis of ANY of them.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much! I'm just afraid that with fr or one attempt I won't get pregnant and after 9 months and all my mom friends having their second babies, I just want to get pregnant! I got pg from one attempt with #2 (the missed mc at 12 weeks), but haven't since. I'm afraid if I have a boy though I will experience the severe gender disappointment I had with my (AMAZING) son. I really want a daughter but don't know how many more BFN I can take.
ATomic, if I don't get pg this cycle. I'm going to get a custom plan. I owe you big time. I would have done that orginally but I thought I would get pg right away like I did the first two times!

You were doing a lot of other stuff to sway though, right??? Until you've tried a straight up one attempt wihtout all the fiddle-faddle, you haven't really tried one attempt, KWIM?? And I'm not saying that to try and get you to do one attempt, I think that's totally at your discretion and your call to make entirely, it's just that I hate to see people blame the one attempt when it's due to a sort of mistaken impresson, if that makes any sense.

[lovemysonbut]

ooops. I screwed it up because I went to the clinic yesterday ad they predicted I may o within a day or two (they won't tell me if they see the surge). They aren't sure though (it was only CD10), and may need to give me a trigger shot on Saturday. I can't go in Friday because I'm working. I bd last night because I didn't want to miss a chance if I o before my next appointment. Any idea what my next best course of action is? I wanted to try one attempt, but messed up. One more attempt at trigger (if they gie me one?) Thanks!

[lovemysonbut]

P.S. If I decide to do lots of attempt to get pg on clomid, how can I lower my ph? Lots of crystal light? Is there anything else I can use? I've never been able to test my ph-the strips never change colour....
I HAVE gotten pg with one attempt before. My second pg was a 1 shot wonder 8 days before o, it was an accident.....maybe I'll try that next month if I can figure out when I o on clomid:)

[lovemysonbut]

grr.....after months of swaying, I discover I have (mild ) hypothyroid. My family doctor didn't discover it because it is considered normal, but not for repoductive purposes according to the fertility clinic. I just read this sways boy BIG TIME. I have been on meds for 8 days, but this probably hasn't made a difference yet. Will the veg diet, no breakfast and clomid counteract that or am I most likely going to end up with a boy after all this?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes you need to have another attempt here. At trigger is perfect.

You DON'T do anything to lower your pH. Lowering pH kills sperm and inhibits pregnancy. Please read this http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/11684-ph-pickle.html Don't worry about testing pH, most of us have 2,3,4 pH opposites to show for our trouble.

I hope you're kidding about attempting 8 days before ovulation.

[atomic sagebrush]

grr.....after months of swaying, I discover I have (mild ) hypothyroid. My family doctor didn't discover it because it is considered normal, but not for repoductive purposes according to the fertility clinic. I just read this sways boy BIG TIME. I have been on meds for 8 days, but this probably hasn't made a difference yet. Will the veg diet, no breakfast and clomid counteract that or am I most likely going to end up with a boy after all this?

I'd love a link to where you read this, I've heard it time and again and I have seen zero data to back it up. There is one form of hypothyroid that is correlated with PCOS and this has led some people to claim that hypo sways blue, but it's a false connection because PCOS sways blue and PCOS people are also more likely to have this form of hypothyroidism.

It is GREAT news that they found this and are treating it because it's one of the main causes of later miscarriages. I know many, many gals with hypo who have daughters. I do not believe it to sway at all.

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks so much! You really are the best:) I'm deciding whether to bd tonight or just skip today and go to tomorrow (could be trigger or o day).
As for the 8 days before. I'm serious. I don't expect it to happen again but my last pg (the mc) I conceived 8 days before o from a one time deed. I do know how rare that is and now can't even getg pg with 7 days of cutoff and 3 months of bd on o. I was charting to start ttc the next month and used opks and it was our only action that monthy (my 14 month old was getting molars and no one was sleeping:)

[atomic sagebrush]

I beg you not to do that. The odds are high that you ovulated early that month regardless of what the OPK indicated, and if you didn't, that's a one in a thousand conception and you can't count on replicating that.

BD right on O really doesn't have that great of a chance of conception. The best odds come from BD 1-2 days before ovulation, and with swaying in the mix (because much of what we do for swaying reduces the odds/length of sperm survival in yoru repro tract) it is best to have attempt on the day of pos OPK.

[lovemysonbut]

Thanks:) I'mm not doing anything to sway anymore other than clomid, skipping breakfast, no meat, less than 40 g protein and fat and lots of crystal light. Other than that, everything''s out the window:) I just want to get pg this cycle!!!! I hope dh has enough sperm left after last night's release!

[atomic sagebrush]

The nice thing is, they make more and it's fairly quick so there should be something there. Good luck and sending you a ton of sticky pink dust.