"There is something that I have to tell you"

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

This old friend I had that lived in the borough I used to live in seems she only gets in contact with me to tell me that she is pregnant. She also has 2 girls as far as I know.

She claims she lost her phone a few times so lost my number.

Well now I moved and I cut contact with her. It is not worth me keeping in contact with somebody I never see.

So now she decides to e-mail me and wants my phone #. I told her that I am going through depression and my GD and me having a 3rd girl etc.

Long story short on today's e-mail she tells me how much she loves me and she has something to tell me but does not know if she should tell me or not.

Now what would you think? I think it is either that she is pregnant with a boy or has a son already?

Am I nuts or would you think that she had the same news?

I do not mean to be mean but I have another pg friend right now that has a son already and it is hard enough for me to find out what she will be having but I am trying my best and she went through a bad loss. I do not see her often though.

I just do not get why this girl always wants to contact me if she is pregnant. And her knowing about my GD and how upset I was over a 3rd girl if she does have a son or is pg with a boy I think that she should just stop the e-mails. She does not need to be in contact with me for any reason. We went our separate ways.

I told her on so many e-mails about what I talk about on these boards and for her to come out now and tell me about a son etc. would rip me.

Like I said it is enough and very hard but with my other friend I will deal with what she has even if she does get a girl after her son. But that is enough for me to handle.

I do not need this person to deal with also. I hope that I am making sense.

With the GD I find that I am not friends with too many people that have the same exact situation that I have and then get their boy or their girl. It is just too painful for me.

Am I jumping the gun, what else can she possibly have to tell me?

Plus today is my dd3s 1 year old B.D. and I do not need this.

She makes it out to be like she just wants to chit chat but it is always something like pregnancy.

Also I was in such a good mood today because I found out that maybe if I do HT that the drugs will be somewhat covered.

I do not know if I should just not open or read any more e-mails just in case it is that news or what I should do to protect my feelings.

[purplepoet20]

Sounds like she has news but it is not worth talking if she really only contacts you once in a great while to tell you about a baby or being preg..... it is very easy to block people on emails, instant message, and even facebook. For your happiness it may be best to just block her.

I am sorry you are having a hard time but it is your DD3 birthday so make it a good day for your family.... :hugs:

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

Sounds like she has news but it is not worth talking if she really only contacts you once in a great while to tell you about a baby or being preg..... it is very easy to block people on emails, instant message, and even facebook. For your happiness it may be best to just block her.

I am sorry you are having a hard time but it is your DD3 birthday so make it a good day for your family.... :hugs:

When she initially contacted me I told her that I had dd3 and all about the GD etc. etc. She did not have news back then so I do not know.

And I agree I may have to just not read the e-mails. I can push them to spam.

But should I read the next e-mail? Or from now and so forth read none? Not sure.

Are you going to try HT also? Kewl.
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I just got an e-mail back from her wishing my dd3 happy bd. But when I wrote the e-mail back to her I explained that most of my depression came from GD because I did not have a son and when I found out dd3 was a girl I even thought of aborting, but I was never able to go through with it. There were many tears. I looked at a website on aborting and I got so sick and I cried and cried and I continued to carry the pregnancy. I love my dd3 more than anything. But when we tell others we had GD or we were upset over the gender they just do not know how deep it can go. Especially on the extreme GD boards on IG.

So anyway she did not mention anything on her last e-mail other than happy B.D. So I am thinking either boy or a pregnancy or something.

From here on in I will not read any other of her e-mails for my own protection I think. My husband even told me so for my own protection. It is not because I am mean, a baby or selfish. It is just pain I cannot deal with if it is true. And especially her not being somebody really in my life.

I do not want to block her e-mail though because then she will get an e-mail back saying this user cannot receive e-mails from you. I did that once to another girl because I did not want contact with her anymore because of other reasons and I regretted just not not reading the e-mails. It is so hard though to see e-mails in your box and just not read them until they fall out of your spam folder. I wish there was an easier way to block people without it being so harch. I have AOL.

Sorry for rambling.

[TTC5]

I would have the exact same thoughts as you that she has had or is having, a boy.

[lovehugs]

My BF from school has 3 girls... it's not her fault! :(

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

I just read back on some of the old e-mails and there was one line in one of them that said can I have your number I will text you and I promise I will not call but when is a good time to talk to you because I have to talk to you or something to that effect.

She knows how I was since #2.

I just have such a feeling it is that and I think the best thing for me to do is not read the e mails any more. What will I gain out of it. If it is true, I will be hurt #1. And #2, I am not up to getting together with her even if this is not true.

We lost contact for so long then she decides to e-mail me.

Like even say if she were just pregnant, I would not want to keep in contact with her for 9 months when I lost contact with her for so long.

And people do not realize with 3 kids, I do not have time to yip yap on the phone.

Gee it is such a shame that today is dd3s bd and this.

My dh and the older girls just went out to get her cake, presents etc. When they come back, I have to snap out of this.

[mybluepilot]

Happy birthday to your alitte princess I am sorry you are going through this. I would just block her COMPLETELY

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

I just reread an e-mail that I sent to her, and since she contacted me in January of this year, I had a feeling it was because of a pregnancy or something.

So on one of my last e-mails I said to her "would you be okay with 3 girls". I said this being she has 2 girls already. And I said do you want any more children?

Then the e-mail after that that she wrote back to me said "You know that I love you and I have to tell you something, but I do not know if I should ".............. and something else that was a typo.

So now that I just put that all together, it has to be that right?

She probably wants to tell me that she had a boy or is having a boy.

If it were a girl, she would say it without a probelm.

The only other thing I can think of is just that she is pregnant and does not know the gender maybe.

I would like to leave it this way though and the unknown will be better for me to deal with.

So from this point on I have to not open and read her e-mails and not be tempted to open them even if I am in a great mood for the day.

[Bambina]

It sounds like she's kind of teasing you with her 'news', which is not very nice, and I would block her to protect yourself.

[ELP]

I reckon she's definately pregnant adn is going to ask you if she should find out or not knowing that you are the only other person she knows maybe with an honest gender preference. She will most definately get a boy, they always do, so maybe even send her an email saying that if it is pregnancy related you do not want to know, harsh maybe but honest:agree:

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

Well today was the first day I just put the e-mail to spam. Yesterday was my dd3s B.D. and I explained to her via e-mail all about the GD and I said I would leave it up to her to tell me her news. So today I just do not want to read anything. I feel I am protecting my own feelings by throwing the e-mails to spam. I mean there is a chance that the news is something else. But I will not take a chance. Plus she does not know me well at all so she may figure telling me this type of thing is no big deal. My dh said to me today that I would even get upset and those feelings if it was any person having a boy after several girls.

So hopefully this will pass and she will not start to title the e-mails with what she has to tell me on the subject line.

[TTC5]

You could block her emails so if she does title them they won't get through.

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

You could block her emails so if she does title them they won't get through.

I put the e-mails so that it would go to spam, but if I check my spam then I can see the e-mail if she titled it "I had a boy" just say.

But if I completely block it then I feel bad in a way because with aol, she would then get a message saying this user cannot get e-mails from you or something like that. Then she would know that I blocked her. With the e-mail going to spam, she would not know that I blocked her.

[Zivic-Bubac]

I would block her e-mails immediately. Why do you care what she's going to think? It's not like she is yours BFF ever and I think once you block her mails you will hardly ever think of her again.
She is just hurting you ( unintentionally, but still) and you have to protect yourself and to feel OK both for yourself and your family :heart:

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

I would block her e-mails immediately. Why do you care what she's going to think? It's not like she is yours BFF ever and I think once you block her mails you will hardly ever think of her again.
She is just hurting you ( unintentionally, but still) and you have to protect yourself and to feel OK both for yourself and your family :heart:

Thanks so much. I think you are right after thinking about it. I think I will change my spam settings to block and not sending the listed users to spam.

First off, she has not seen me since I was pregnant with #2 which is over 4 years ago so how can she say "I love you, but I have to tell you something, and I do not know if I will hot"...... (type) and not sure if the rest. It was typed from a phone and got cut off or something.

Secondly, I told her from her first e-mail about my pregnancy and it being a girl and how upset I was and depressed etc. She said she will give me all the time that I need. But all along I felt she wanted to tell me something because usually when she contacts me since I moved it is to tell me about a pregnancy. So now that it is May, she wrote on one e-mail asking me if I am still depressed? I mean even if I am better I do no think there will be any right time for her to tell me she is having a boy after 2 girls (if this is what it is).

And plus she knew how I was after #2 being another girl.

I feel she should just not contact me because we will never get together. And I have no reason to be in contact. You meet people through your life and it does not mean you have to keep in touch with everyone.

If it were a close friend, like my other friend who is now pregnant, I would have to find a way to deal with it. But with her, I do not have to deal with it at all.

So I am putting it on block LOL.

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

Well now that I blocked her and she cannot send me messages and will get a message back saying that this user is not accepting e-mails from you. Now she sent me an e-mail under her husbands name and I just deleted it. There is now way that I can block it unless I open it. So let her keep sending under his name and if she titles the e-mail there is nothing I can do at this point.

[TTC5]

Go to your spam settings and type in both their email accounts xx

[Bambina]

It sounds like she's really trying to get to you, so I would block her husband's account too. You don't need 'friends' like that!

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

I cannot see her husband's e-mail unless I open the e-mail because it has this ............... and you cannot see the rest of it.

She probably wants to tell me that she is either pregnant, pregnant with a boy or had a boy. She should just realize how much that would hurt me and cut the contact. But people just do not know us unless they know us very well.

[purplepoet20]

Open the email but hold a peice of paper over the message..... You need to block because you don't need the stress.

Honestly to me she sounds like my mom... trying to get to you and make herself feel powerful. She knows it will hurt you but she is attention hungry. Maybe all her family knows and in the recent days or weeks have stopped giving her the attention she wants so she is seeking it from someone else... you.

The worst type of person to know!!!