Oh dear... did I do this wrong?

[TTC5]

I thought the term cut off meant the days you get hubby to abstain is this not right?

My hubby last dtd on cd 9 (in the evening) he abstained for 4 days and we bd'ed on cd 13 and ovulation either happened soon after or up to 24 hours later.

I thought this is what we were meant to do? Best to get hubby to hold off for 2-4 days with day 4 being the better one, and to time intercourse as close to or just before Ovulation??

[Kris217]

Or does cut off mean the amount days before ovulation that you DTD?

[Plum3]

You are both right I think. It means the same thing doesn't it? You obstain for 4 days before your attempt therefore you have a 4 day cut off. That's how I interpret it. How come you are questioning it TTC5? I think your sway was fantastic, I hope mine is as good as yours!

[Flava]

I think the same like you. DH wait for 4 days the dtd just before O . I would not do this different for sure.Unless you want to dtd twice.
Some ppl dtd more then 1 time so DH abstain for 4 days the dtd like 2-3 days before O then he abstain again and dtd 1 more time on O day.

[TTC5]

I was talking to another lady online and she seems to think that I have done it wrong?

[Plum3]

Oh ok, well I would have done the same thing you did. What did she think you should have done?

[begonia]

TTC5 ITA with everyone here ... 4 day cut off means no sex (or release for him) for 4 days prior to BD. I'm wondering what Bec is too ... what did this other person say you did wrong? Because I think your timing was great!

[TTC5]

Thanks guys, apparently a cut off means having sex (baby dancing sex lol) 4 days prior to ovulation and then nothing... well this person reckons if I made him hold off for 4 days I have increased the female sperm? :S

[Kris217]

Yeah i thought cut off meant having sex too but that could be wrong. Like 4 day cut off meant DTD 4 days before O and that's it.....hmm we need to find out for sure!

[TTC5]

We do don't we.. wheres atomic when we need her ;)

[Plum3]

I am positive a 4 day cut off means having protected sex (or DH releasing himself) 4 days before attempt. I don't see how abstaining for 4 days increases female sperm count? All the studies suggest otherwise don't they???

[Kris217]

We do don't we.. wheres atomic when we need her ;)

Exactly what i was thinking!!! lol

[TTC5]

I am positive a 4 day cut off means having protected sex (or DH releasing himself) 4 days before attempt. I don't see how abstaining for 4 days increases female sperm count? All the studies suggest otherwise don't they???

Yes that's what I thought hence why I did that .. oh well it is done now lol.

[Kris217]

I think people get confused by cut off and abstaining?

[TTC5]

Sounds like it!

[jane]

I think people get confused by cut off and abstaining?

its the same thing....isnt it?......atomic.....atomic.....help needed!!! hah!:bigsmile:

[rainbowflower]

I am positive a 4 day cut off means having protected sex (or DH releasing himself) 4 days before attempt. I don't see how abstaining for 4 days increases female sperm count? All the studies suggest otherwise don't they???

4-day cut off means DTD 4 days before OV but no closer to OV than that

abstaining means prior to the attempt DH not releasing, because swimmers need to be released in order to become newer healthy ones and so sperm count will lower as a result.


but you're right, studies talking about CUT OFFS have disproved those, as far as I know there haven't been any studies on abstaining (that I've seen anyway)

[ELP]

4 day cut off = last dtd 4 days before Ov
4 day abst = DH no release for 4 days before dtd

But I'm pretty sure the 4 day abst is best for blue as higher sperm count sways blue, and timing doesn't make much difference.

[Kris217]

4 day cut off = last dtd 4 days before Ov
4 day abst = DH no release for 4 days before dtd

But I'm pretty sure the 4 day abst is best for blue as higher sperm count sways blue, and timing doesn't make much difference.

Yes that sounds right, glad we got that figured out!

[Zivic-Bubac]

its the same thing....isnt it?......atomic.....atomic.....help needed!!! hah!:bigsmile:

I had the same dilemma back on IG, but RingosDrum kindly explained to me it's not the same thing

ELP and Bec are right, ELP gave excellent definition what is cut-off and what is abstinance.

TTC5, IMO the only concern here might be were there any X-survivors up there when O occurred so the fresh sperm didn't have chance to get there first. That's the worse scenario, God forbid, and I think it's not likely.

That's why you should have 4 days abstainance ( not cut-off), for example, you can have baby dance sex :wink: like 7-8 days prior to O ( so no survivors up in the cervix), then have him release 4 days before O, then no sex no release and on O day unprotected sex.
This is how I understand it, but I'm going with every other day BD around O anyway.

We all know timing is the least important, so FX you are already cookin' sticky blue bean :luck::xy::luck:

[Plum3]

I had the same dilemma back on IG, but RingosDrum kindly explained to me it's not the same thing

ELP and Bec are right, ELP gave excellent definition what is cut-off and what is abstinance.

TTC5, IMO the only concern here might be were there any X-survivors up there when O occurred so the fresh sperm didn't have chance to get there first. That's the worse scenario, God forbid, and I think it's not likely.

That's why you should have 4 days abstainance ( not cut-off), for example, you can have baby dance sex :wink: like 7-8 days prior to O ( so no survivors up in the cervix), then have him release 4 days before O, then no sex no release and on O day unprotected sex.
This is how I understand it, but I'm going with every other day BD around O anyway.

We all know timing is the least important, so FX you are already cookin' sticky blue bean :luck::xy::luck:

I actually did a google search and your post came up on IG. I thought they were the same thing in the beginning but now I understand the difference (I think!).

I think TTC5 said she had protected sex 4 days before attempt so there wouldn't be any surviving sperm there when O occurred.

[Plum3]

Ok, so I'm going to sound like a bimbo, but the more I think about it now the more confused I get. Arggggh!

So, when swaying for blue I thought we were to have protected sex until our actual attempt/s to prevent the possibility of any surviving sperm being at the cervix. Right? So, if that's right then in this case wouldn't a 4 day cut off be the same as 4 days abstaining? Cut off is 4 days before attempt, meaning this is the last time DH will release (through protected sex or himself), which also means by the time it is attempt time he will have abstained for 4 days. 4 day cut off results in 4 days abstaining?

My head is spinning!

[jane]

Ok, so I'm going to sound like a bimbo, but the more I think about it now the more confused I get. Arggggh!

So, when swaying for blue I thought we were to have protected sex until our actual attempt/s to prevent the possibility of any surviving sperm being at the cervix. Right? So, if that's right then in this case wouldn't a 4 day cut off be the same as 4 days abstaining? Cut off is 4 days before attempt, meaning this is the last time DH will release (through protected sex or himself), which also means by the time it is attempt time he will have abstained for 4 days. 4 day cut off results in 4 days abstaining?

My head is spinning!ha!:rofl:im with you on this one! hope we get it right soon!!!!

[Flava]

bec 4 day cutoff and 4 day abstaining is not the same because if you do the cut off that's means you dtd 4 days before O day , 1 try. If you get a bfp then you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off.

4 day abstaining means DH wait 4 days and the you dtd on O day 1 try. If you get a bfp you get pregnant with 4 day abstaining but no cut off.

You can do both dtd 4 days before O with DH already abstaining for 4 days and then dtd again on O day 2 try for bfp here.So if you get a bfp you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off and also 4 day abstaining .

Of course it can be 3 days 2 days so on . We just try for 4 day abstaining to build sperm count for ttc boy.

SO TTC5 You just don't worry you did it good!!!

[Kris217]

bec 4 day cutoff and 4 day abstaining is not the same because if you do the cut off that's means you dtd 4 days before O day , 1 try. If you get a bfp then you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off.

4 day abstaining means DH wait 4 days and the you dtd on O day 1 try. If you get a bfp you get pregnant with 4 day abstaining but no cut off.

You can do both dtd 4 days before O with DH already abstaining for 4 days and then dtd again on O day 2 try for bfp here.So if you get a bfp you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off and also 4 day abstaining .

Of course it can be 3 days 2 days so on . We just try for 4 day abstaining to build sperm count for ttc boy.

SO TTC5 You just don't worry you did it good!!!

That makes sense Flava, thanks for the explanation :)

[Plum3]

Yay, I get it, thankyou Flava! And thankyou Zivic. I re-read both posts and it is stuck in my little brain now. I swear, I'm not usually this dumb, honestly!

I can sleep easy now ;)

[atomic sagebrush]

I thought the term cut off meant the days you get hubby to abstain is this not right?

My hubby last dtd on cd 9 (in the evening) he abstained for 4 days and we bd'ed on cd 13 and ovulation either happened soon after or up to 24 hours later.

I thought this is what we were meant to do? Best to get hubby to hold off for 2-4 days with day 4 being the better one, and to time intercourse as close to or just before Ovulation??

Ok, well I have been confused by several of your posts lately and NOW this makes sense.

To me and Dr. Shettles at any rate, a "cut-off" means you stop DTD a certain number of days before ovulation. Nothing to do with days of abstinence at all. So I couldn't quite understand why you were asking about cutoffs before. You don't WANT a cutoff when you TTC blue, you want to DTD close to ovulation. So you would not have a cutoff, but you would still have 4 days abstinence.

[atomic sagebrush]

bec 4 day cutoff and 4 day abstaining is not the same because if you do the cut off that's means you dtd 4 days before O day , 1 try. If you get a bfp then you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off.

4 day abstaining means DH wait 4 days and the you dtd on O day 1 try. If you get a bfp you get pregnant with 4 day abstaining but no cut off.

You can do both dtd 4 days before O with DH already abstaining for 4 days and then dtd again on O day 2 try for bfp here.So if you get a bfp you got pregnant with a 4 day cut off and also 4 day abstaining .

Of course it can be 3 days 2 days so on . We just try for 4 day abstaining to build sperm count for ttc boy.

SO TTC5 You just don't worry you did it good!!!

What she said! :agree:

[atomic sagebrush]

I thought the term cut off meant the days you get hubby to abstain is this not right?

My hubby last dtd on cd 9 (in the evening) he abstained for 4 days and we bd'ed on cd 13 and ovulation either happened soon after or up to 24 hours later.

I thought this is what we were meant to do? Best to get hubby to hold off for 2-4 days with day 4 being the better one, and to time intercourse as close to or just before Ovulation??

You did it exactly right, just that it's not called a cutoff.

[atomic sagebrush]

TTC5 ITA with everyone here ... 4 day cut off means no sex (or release for him) for 4 days prior to BD. I'm wondering what Bec is too ... what did this other person say you did wrong? Because I think your timing was great!

Just again, I think we are all on the same page here now but to clarify, that is NOT a cutoff. That is abstinence.

So if you told someone that you had a 4 day cutoff, they think you meant that you DTD 4 days before O.

I guess you're getting confused because you cut DH off for 4 days so you think it's called a cutoff? But it isn't, it's abstinence.

As long as you DTD on O or the day before O, with 2-4 days abstinence beforehand, that is the right timing and BD pattern for

[atomic sagebrush]

Yeah i thought cut off meant having sex too but that could be wrong. Like 4 day cut off meant DTD 4 days before O and that's it.....hmm we need to find out for sure!

Yes that's it exactly. You can have a 4 day cutoff and DTD every day beforehand, or you can have a 4 day cutoff with 4 days of abstinence beforehand.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks guys, apparently a cut off means having sex (baby dancing sex lol) 4 days prior to ovulation and then nothing... well this person reckons if I made him hold off for 4 days I have increased the female sperm? :S

She thinks you DTD 4 days before O, which according to Shettles is girl timing.

You did not increase the female sperm, firstly because that's not how it works anyway, and secondly because 4 days abstinence INCREASES sperm count, not lowers it.

[atomic sagebrush]

I am positive a 4 day cut off means having protected sex (or DH releasing himself) 4 days before attempt. I don't see how abstaining for 4 days increases female sperm count? All the studies suggest otherwise don't they???

It doesn't. 2-4 days abstinence maximizes sperm count and sways blue.

However, DTD once 4 days before ovulation, with 7-10 days of abstinence beforehand, sways pink. THAT is what is called a cutoff.

[atomic sagebrush]

its the same thing....isnt it?......atomic.....atomic.....help needed!!! hah!:bigsmile:

No, they are two different things...does everyone understand now?

[rainbowflower]

She thinks you DTD 4 days before O, which according to Shettles is girl timing.

You did not increase the female sperm, firstly because that's not how it works anyway, and secondly because 4 days abstinence INCREASES sperm count, not lowers it.

oh I thought it did the opposite...how's that work?

[atomic sagebrush]

I had the same dilemma back on IG, but RingosDrum kindly explained to me it's not the same thing

ELP and Bec are right, ELP gave excellent definition what is cut-off and what is abstinance.

TTC5, IMO the only concern here might be were there any X-survivors up there when O occurred so the fresh sperm didn't have chance to get there first. That's the worse scenario, God forbid, and I think it's not likely.

That's why you should have 4 days abstainance ( not cut-off), for example, you can have baby dance sex :wink: like 7-8 days prior to O ( so no survivors up in the cervix), then have him release 4 days before O, then no sex no release and on O day unprotected sex.
This is how I understand it, but I'm going with every other day BD around O anyway.

We all know timing is the least important, so FX you are already cookin' sticky blue bean :luck::xy::luck:

You guys are so awesome! Thanks to all who chimed in to help! :agree:

[gizmo77]

You guys are so awesome! Thanks to all who chimed in to help! :agree:

i never even considered this till i read this post and theni DID get confused. but all of you clarified.

a cut off is typically meant for a girl sway bc if youre worried about timing, you have UNprotected sex (BD/DTD/TTC sex=having sex for the purpose of getting knocked up) 4 days before you ovulate (if its a 4-day cutoff). then never have THAT sex again until confirmed Ov. abstaining is not having sex (any type: unprotected, protected) and not releasing for the purpose of building sperm count.

sounds like a CUT OFF is meant for ppl who dont want to have sex (to get pregnant) on OVULATION DAY. thus you have your 5 day cut off, 1 day cut off, but i guess you can even say zero day cut off (but id just say i had sex on O day). just words here...!

[TTC5]

She thinks you DTD 4 days before O, which according to Shettles is girl timing.

You did not increase the female sperm, firstly because that's not how it works anyway, and secondly because 4 days abstinence INCREASES sperm count, not lowers it.

Thanks Atomic!!

[TTC5]

I actually did a google search and your post came up on IG. I thought they were the same thing in the beginning but now I understand the difference (I think!).

I think TTC5 said she had protected sex 4 days before attempt so there wouldn't be any surviving sperm there when O occurred.

No no lol my hubby released cd 9 and then not again until cd 13, ff picked up today o happend on cd 13. Although i could have o on cd 14 so 24 hrs after bding.

[TTC5]

4 day cut off = last dtd 4 days before Ov
4 day abst = DH no release for 4 days before dtd

But I'm pretty sure the 4 day abst is best for blue as higher sperm count sways blue, and timing doesn't make much difference.

DH must have had a huge sperm count on our attempt with 4 days abst coz he could hardly walk that day he was sooooo sore HAHAHAHA

[jane]

No, they are two different things...does everyone understand now?

yep,i think ive got it,thanks!

[atomic sagebrush]

oh I thought it did the opposite...how's that work?

2-4 days abstinence increases sperm count because it optimizes the turnover of sperm so you get the most, fresh sperm. It's like a supply and demand kinda thing - if the supply and demand are in balance, you get a lot of good quality sperm.

7-10 days abstinence lowers sperm count (sways pink) because the testicles kinda give up and stop churning out as many sperm and the sperm that are in the nuts are often older and lower quality. So lower demand = lower supply.

Frequent release also lowers sperm count (sways pink) because the testicles can't keep up, so less sperm are made - they may be higher quality though. So too high of demand also = lower supply because the equipment can only produce so much.

2-4 days abstinence seems to be the perfect amount of supply and demand, where the body produces a large amount of high quality semen. (sways blue)

[Plum3]

No no lol my hubby released cd 9 and then not again until cd 13, ff picked up today o happend on cd 13. Although i could have o on cd 14 so 24 hrs after bding.

Lol, sorry! I knew that you didn't BD on CD9 so just assumed you used protection.

[Plum3]

No, they are two different things...does everyone understand now?

Yep :) Thankyou Atomic and everyone else who helped clarify!

[TTC5]

Lol, sorry! I knew that you didn't BD on CD9 so just assumed you used protection.

Yep we used protection for sure! x

[My Fabulous Children]

Good explain.