Ectopic pregnancy- any advice would be great

[laVieEnRose]

Hi,
I have had a confirmed ectopic pregnancy diagnosed yesterday and I am booked in for surgery tomorrow.

Yesterday was just awful- I felt really hopeless and sad and devastated with the loss. Making the decision to have surgery rather than the injection wasn't easy but I feel it is the right one to make for me. I read so much about the methotraxate injection and the side effects and how long it stays in your system didn't seem right for me. Plus still not guarantee it would finish everything for sure...

I do feel sad to be loosing a tube and really hope it won't affect my fertility. My DH said not too worry as they are only taking the 'boys making' tube and the remaining one will 'make' our girl - it did make me smile, but still I find it hard to accept the situation.

It was our first month TTC pink and now I have to put everything on hold for a while and I feel that all my Swaying pink efforts and hard work were all for nothing...I don't even know if I will be able todo it again as I feel guilty that I might have caused this...

It would be good to hear if anyone has experienced something similar and how you coped, how long you waited before TTC etc....
Thank you

[Mulberry Smurf]

No advice am afraid but gentle hugs. Hope you're ok hun I can't imagine how hard it must be. Hope you get your girl one day xxx

[Houseofblue]

BIG HUGS!!! While I've never had an EP I have had 4 losses and I know how much it sucks...I know losing your tube adds more stress and grief!

Some hope: A good friend of mine has 6 girls. A couple years ago she went through a couple m/c's and then an EP where she lost one of her tubes. She was devastated and worried, just like you. At the time she had the 5 girls. Literally within a few months she was PG with her 6th girl, and that little girl just turned 1!

You will be higher risk for another EP so your doc will probably keep close tabs on you from early on, but you can absolutely get PG again! :)

[WantingPink]

I have had two friends with EP. One took the shot and saved her tube and one had her tube removed. The one that had her tube removed went on to have another child. The one who decided on the injection wasn't trying to have more children so it isn't surprising she didn't have anymore.

I am sorry. You are in a difficult situation and I couldn't even imagine. So sorry for you loss!!

[The Anchor]

I'm so sorry for your loss :(. I hope you are able to find peace somehow.

I cycled with a woman who had lost her right tube to EP...she ended up with 7 XX embies and only one XY. Weird right?

[kitkat18]

La vie I'm so sorry ! I have no advice to give except my mum conceived me at 36 with only one tube after a ton of miscarriages and losing a tube to an ectopic pregnancy.
Your DH is so lovely I'm glad you have good support.
Please don't beat yourself up this could have happened to any of us , thinking of you xxxxx

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[laVieEnRose]

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words of support and hope.
I'm in big denial right now because the funny thing is I feel fine. I don't feel ill.
I know it has to be done as it isn't resolving by itself and could be fatal but I'm suddenly feeling very attached to that tube (never given it any thoughts before Lol). Funny how we take things for granted.
I am thankful for my healthy boys and my supportive husband and family and for you guys.
I hope to be back in a few months and may still 'see' some of you on here (although of course I wish you all BFP soon! )
Love and light xx

[SamS_TTCPink]

laVieEnRose I hope everything goes well with your surgery, and remember to take the time to rest and recover. It's nice your DH is so supportive. Know that you didn't cause this at all, it's just one of those things that happen and it sux but it's not at all through any fault of yours.

You're in my thoughts and prayers, don't be a stranger and let us know how it all goes. You have lots of support here too. ❤️


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[maidentomother]

I posted in the April thread but I'll post more here.

HUGS, first of all.

I have had the methotrexate shot 3 times (technically 4) at double the normal dose, and I have never had any side effects from it. None. I haven't TTC soon after, however...though I conceived a year after each dose with no problems. These were abortions when I was in college.

My latest (planned) pregnancy in 2012 was heterotropic twins, one of which was ectopic, on my ovary. I miscarried naturally and according to drs, there was no damage, but now for the first time, I don't seem to be getting pregnant easily. I have known several other women who didn't have surgery for their EPs, and retained their ovaries/tubes, only later to discover they had damage that inhibited further TTC. Whereas the women I know who lost a tube/ovary, almost all of them went on to conceive normal pregnancies. In my case, bc I miscarried early enough, I didn't have to make your choice but I wonder if that ovary is stil causing me problems. So surgery may very well be the best option, and I hope you recover swiftly.

[atomic sagebrush]

I'm so sorry and hope that you are feeling better soon!!!

[Rainbow baby]

I had an ectopic back in 2000 it was my first ever pregnancy. I was unaware I was pregnant at the time and it progressed to 14-16 weeks or possibly twins because the "mass" was so large and then I ruptured. I was very young and and had been using birth control still getting my regular periods or so I had thought.. Thinking back they were never proper periods mainly old blood but timed as periods with the pill somehow. Any way it was the scariest time of my life.. The recovery itself a breeze. I lost one tube but the ovary remained. I was later informed it is actually common to conceive from either ovary even though I have only one tube. I have gone on to have had 3 boys, 2 early m/c and a late loss all from the remaining tube and ovary.. I haven't conceived from the other side as of yet but they check as soon as possible during future pregnancy's at 5-6 weeks. It was very easy for me to conceive as the ectopic wasn't caused by any underlying issues like endo. Its mostly emotional pain you have to get through and when you do you can conceive pretty much next cycle. Yes it does effect your fertility but not as much as you would think and definable not halved unless you lose your ovary as well.

[atomic sagebrush]

Coralsky had an ectopic and only one tube, you might want to message her (she is really super nice and I know she would share her experience with you)

[laVieEnRose]

Thanks rainbow baby, these are very reassuring words.
I have had surgery nearly 3 weeks ago and although the first week was rough, as you said the physical recovery has been fairly quick.
I'm not too bad emotionally as only really had 2 days to think I was pregnant but assumed I miscarried anyway...I was more shocked to have to loose a tube and decreasing my fertility but as you said and as I have read its doesn't decrease it that much.
I think I am also very blessed to have already 3 kids which fulfill me and helps me to get through it all. It must be doubly hard for women who have not had children yet.

Do you remember how soon you TTC again?


Atomic: how do I contact another member? Through private message? X

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes just send her a PM, she isn't on that much lately but does come on once in a while still.

[Mrs_Incredible]

She was online tonight xx


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