yet another timing question (kind of)

[angielorna]

So 2 months of failed TTC'ing. I think I'm going to give it one more go this month but change up the 1 attempt at pos OPK.

Here's my thought process....please be brutally honest if my thinking is distorted!

DH has always been a daily releaser. If he does 2x per day for a few days before attempt(s) that would lower sperm count, right? Do you think it would lower it enough for us to DTD every third day and still have a girl sway? I really want to go to every other to increase chances of pregnancy, but such a decreased pink sway makes me apprehensive.

If we DTD on the 2nd daily release every 3rd day, do you think that is enough? I think our timing has been off but I'm not 100% sure. It could just be because I'm getting old. Since discovering OPKS we've always gotten pregnant either on the first go round or by oops. So this whole TTC'ing is annoying :P

I'm also feeling as though the diet and timing is more important than the testosterone levels....hopefully I'm right about that!!!

Any input would be appreciated!

Thanks,
Angie

[maidentomother]

I would have him release less and stick with the one attempt. BDing more frequently should be the last thing you do IMO. So many sways fail bc people get impatient and have multiple attempts! I would drop FR and any antihistamines before adding attempts.

[angielorna]

Thanks, maidentomother. I'm not doing the antihistimine and DH has only been doing his regular once a day release (since birth, I think :P). Last month we BD every 4 days until after ovulation. Only once in the fertile period (late the night before pos OPK). So we BD late Thursday night, o on Sunday.

Thanks for the response :)
Angie

[bluebonnet22]

If OPK work for you I'd stick with the one attempt at positive rather than every 4 days so your timing is a little better. I would not do every 3 days. I'd drop antihistamines and just one attempt at positive OPK. I honestly think how many attempts you have sways more than release frequency.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

all you are doing is trading one thing that will lower odds of conception (the one attempt, which I know no one wants to believe me but it really does NOT even lower odds of conception by much) for soemthing that will REALLY lower odds of conception considerably (having DH release 2xa day) and also may sway a bit more blue (attempt every 3 days leaving you with 2 attempts in fertile window, which has gotten between 5-10% lower results for pink - stats go up and down so the number does not stay consistent, but one attempt has gotten 70-75% pink, whereas 2 attempts has hovered at about 65% pink) To me, it's a poor trade and not what I would have you do.

Is there ANY way to get DH to ease off the daily release?? Even if it was just ONE day before attempt. My guess is that he is not producing enough swimmers - his numbers may decline from age or if he was taking sway supps

Never lose sight of the fact that it takes fully fertile couples doing NOTHING to sway, 3-6 months to get pregnant. It very well may have taken you guys longer than 1 month to get pregnant this time even if you were not swaying. I really hate seeing people giving up swaying after 1 or 2 months when in those months they were doing other things to sway, yk?? People have this tendency to start off strict, then after 2 BFN, panic and throw their whole sways out the window. Just stay the course and gradually drop things over the course of time and you WILL get pregnant eventually.

[maidentomother]

That is my thinking too...even a day or two of not releasing may make the difference.

[WantingPink]

Maybe DH can not release the day before attempt like Atomic was saying and then you could J&D? Do you normally get PG on the first month?

[angielorna]

Mmm...here I was trying to figure out how to decrease his sperm count!

He's always been a daily releaser and with our first successful pregnancy we DTD almost daily through o (he did resist the urge to help himself during that time as per my request). Our second successful pregnancy we DTD 2 days in a row (he was an oops). We conceived a girl once (an oops)-- lost her at 14 weeks -- and I know it was only 1 time (DH told everyone he could put his hand in a woodchipper and still count how many times we had sex and I still got pregnant).

I guess I should look at that -- no diet, no sway stuff, just sex once in the fertile period. Hmmmm....***oh right, I was also pumping for 11 month old DS1. I'm sure my pumping 70-90 oz of breastmilk a day had SOMETHING to do with conceiving a girl!

Yes, I do normally get preggo the first month (or by an oops). The only thing he has done for the sway is not eat read meat. He's 34 now and our last was conceived when he was 30. All I have really done is the diet, pep tea, fiber.

I told him a few days ago I might just be done with trying to get pregnant. He tells me it's only been 2 months, that's not very long (which is true). And I guess I'm concerned about my age (36 in July) and previous issues. I'm getting old, which is probably not helping our fertility -- stupid DH for waiting so long before giving into the third baby!!!!! I know it's not the sway (diet) itself that's the culprit for our missed months. It's the sperm not being there -- ready willing and able -- when it needs to be, I'm sure.

Thank you all for pointing out my distorted thinking :) If you don't think his morning release on the day of attempt is necessary, then maybe I'll have him wait that day until our attempt.

Thanks again for setting me straight :P
Angie

[Rosie85]

I too really think he should avoid releasing a day or two before your attempt. Hopefully he will! Don't give up hope yet...This next time around could very well be it!

[Mrs_Incredible]

My dh is 39, I'm 38 and got pg with one attempt both times - month 3 (blighted ovum mc) and month 4 (2 weeks after mc). Harmony says healthy girl x


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Morning release is NEVER recommended with straight FR. never ever ever. That is for people doing either compressed or hurry up FR. I don't want anyone doing a morning release/evening attempt with the straight FR 7-10 days of daily release.

As for getting "old" you are talking to someone who was terribly worried about being too "old" at 36 and did a ton of stuff to boost fertility (had a boy), then went on to have babies at 39 (did some stuff to boost fertility, result BOY) and 42 (did jack squat - girl). I kick myself now for doing all that stuff to boost fertility with those prev. conceptions!!! All "old" is, is the statistically average age that fertility begins to taper off across the whole population. It doesn't tell you anything about YOU angie's odds of conception or fertility. So while I do know it can mess with your head, all the gobbeldygook about advanced maternal age and so forth, don't let it scare you into doing things that are not going to help you achieve your dream!

[angielorna]

Thanks so much for the response. I know it's not about ME specifically, but I have anxiety about the increase in chances of chromosomal abnormalities (we lost our girl because she either had a chromosomal abnormality or a neural tube defect).

Umm, I'm sorry to be a pain, but I need to you to clarify for me....DH should not release in the am with an attempt in the p.m.? When should his daily release happen, if we were doing 1x daily FR? I didn't realize timing was to come into it! We are approximately 8 days from attempt....!

Angie

[atomic sagebrush]

right. Daily FR is one a day for 7-10 days. No additional releases and then on day of attempt, he just does the attempt that day.

WHenever he wants it to be. Does not have to be at a particular time of day.

I am confused, how is timing coming into it???

[angielorna]

oops.

[angielorna]

Morning release is NEVER recommended with straight FR. never ever ever. That is for people doing either compressed or hurry up FR. I don't want anyone doing a morning release/evening attempt with the straight FR 7-10 days of daily release.

Okay, thanks for the clarification. I misunderstood this part. I thought you meant morning release was never recommended PERIOD, not just on the day of attempt :P That makes so much more sense to me. Thank you so much. I admire both your wealth of information and your dedication to the site and all the annonymus people on it. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all the help I've received from everyone here (including you, of course). I'm so happy I found this place....or else I would have been doing SHELLTES. I shudder to think!!!

Angie

[WantingPink]

I too wouldn't let the old/over 35 get too you too much. We got PG on the first egg while BF and I am 39 and so is DH. So much for decreased fertility:) When I was 38 and PG with DD1 I was so worried about chromosomal abnormalities and my age. I asked the uls tech about it and she said 1/2 the practice is women over 35 and about another quarter of those are over 40. She said even with "advanced" maternal age the risk is still pretty low. I can understand your worries though... especially since there may have been a chromosomal issue with once of your previous babies. Hang in there!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

^^^that is what my doctor said too "you can go on having babies as long as you would like and your body allows" :)

[maidentomother]

My mom conceived me from one donor insemination, just before she turned 36. I'm pretty sure she sways at least slightly boy innately, bc 7 years later she conceived my brother via frequent sex with the same man.

There is a famous sperm donor who has fathered just over 100 kids, most of them via one attempt (either sex or AI), and over 60 of them are girls. He told me that the majority of women conceive from just one attempt, often on the first try.

[atomic sagebrush]

need links!!!!!! would love to read about that.

I have had two blue swayers who had to do at home insemination and both got girls with otherwise good blue sways.