I worry about what will happen down there after 4 babies

[May333]

Am I being irrational? I have 3 kids, delivered vaginally, but I worry about having a 4th. I'm sure things are different (my first 2 are from a previous marriage) when I have my third my husband said everything was the same and could not tell the difference, but I'm worried about a 4th one... what if it gets too big!!!!:think: or what if it looks horrible, or it won't feel good anymore....
For those who have more than 3 kids, was that ever a concern?

Thanks for your input and for letting me vent and be honest about something so personal!!!

[Mrs_Incredible]

I'm due my 4th in 6 weeks. Right now my longed for dd is breech and for the first time ever i am facing the prospect of a section. Considering i birth my babies very quickly, ds2 was an hour from waters going to holding him, i will be quite upset to go through a section for my last baby. I would much prefer to do it the way i know how x

[May333]

I know exactly what you mean, is not that I want to have a c-section, but I do worried about what will happen down there... and this is just me, my dh has never made a comment or say anything to me, he would never say anything mean about it, but I talk about it with a few friends and they do agree... a lot has to change... my good friend is an RN for labor and delivery and she says, it gets bad when you have babies very close together but not for having many babies.

[Mrs_Incredible]

I think you've given me a new worry now tho lol! So far dh and i have no complaints ;) I've had a 3, 4 & this one will be 3year age gap so maybe that's helped. I was told i could have an assisted breech delivery. But i would consider that too big a gamble, one I'm not willing to take. If i need a section so be it, id rather it was a calm controlled event rather than baby getting stuck and it being an emergency situation. Maybe this post has provided my silver lining :) xx

[True Blue]

I have naturally birthed all my babies, you have nothing to worry about. It all goes back to the way it was, I do kegel excercises regularly and have no problems whatsoever.
This was something that I was super worried about too. The kegels make all the difference.

[2boysJustOneGirl]

I think one vaginal delivery really paves the way for the next! I wouldn't expect a huge change just knowing the female anatomy.
One of the best tricks to keeping things "together" down there is to keep a strong pelvic floor and core before and during pregnancy!


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[atomic sagebrush]

Your body is made to do this. When you are pregnant your body releases hormones that allow your tissues to stretch and then when your pg is over, this hormone gradually goes away and things return to normal.

Think of it this way - why would something suddenly change after 3 kids??? IT's that first darn kid that does you in and then the rest of em are just gravy LOL

Fact straight from a doctor - the changes that happen "below the equator" actually happen both to women who have kids and those who don't. The actual forces of gravity, day in, day out (not to mention pooping/peeing daily and even just from normal sexual intercourse) take more of a toll than this one time event. Sorry for TMI but I had to go to the butt doctor after my 4th and he said while childbirth does change things, in many ways it's actually better than what he sees in women without kids because we had the hormones from the pregnancies that actually mitigate the normal wear and tear of the years on our girly bits. :)

[atomic sagebrush]

Honestly, I find nurses are THE WORST for being meanspirited gossips spreading anti-female old wives tales as truth. (not that your friend is like this, but that she has heard things reported as fact from other nurses) Nurses need to keep their mouths shut about things they "see" in the delivery room because it is absolutely unethical for medical professionals to "tell tales out of school".

[atomic sagebrush]

I think you've given me a new worry now tho lol! So far dh and i have no complaints ;) I've had a 3, 4 & this one will be 3year age gap so maybe that's helped. I was told i could have an assisted breech delivery. But i would consider that too big a gamble, one I'm not willing to take. If i need a section so be it, id rather it was a calm controlled event rather than baby getting stuck and it being an emergency situation. Maybe this post has provided my silver lining :) xx

Think of it this way, if this theory was true and sex becomes like "throwing a hot dog down the hallway", then wouldn't birth become less and less painful? I mean, after a couple babies, wouldn't they start walking out on their own? If things didn't go back to normal, wouldn't you be like dilated to 10 already and not even have to go through labor??

This idea is just rubbish spread by plastic surgeons and mean men who watch too much pornography IMO. ;)

[atomic sagebrush]

I'm due my 4th in 6 weeks. Right now my longed for dd is breech and for the first time ever i am facing the prospect of a section. Considering i birth my babies very quickly, ds2 was an hour from waters going to holding him, i will be quite upset to go through a section for my last baby. I would much prefer to do it the way i know how x

6 weeks is plenty of time for her to turn!! Try Spinning Babies.com or laying upside down on an ironing board with your feet elevated- when my 2nd was breech I did this one time and he flipped!!

[mommymachine]

Atomic--- you're amazing.

[Mrs_Incredible]

6 weeks is plenty of time for her to turn!! Try Spinning Babies.com or laying upside down on an ironing board with your feet elevated- when my 2nd was breech I did this one time and he flipped!!


oh really!! I've been trying an improvised version but might do it properly. Thanks :) xx

[Mrs_Incredible]

Thank goodness i have a wide ironing board lol!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Just be sure your husband is there to help you up again because it does make the blood rush to your head. :) Was quite dizzy for a mo after getting up!

[blueeyedguys]

If you're really concerned, Aligned & Well/Katy Bowman has a DVD called "Down There for Women" to help you tone & strengthen your pelvic floor. Kegels are just a part of the solution (& can make things worse if that's all you do)

[atomic sagebrush]

^^^^ I have also heard a bit about Kegels possibly aggravating muscle tone problems for some women - if you have a spare minute can you elaborate?

[atomic sagebrush]

If you're really concerned, Aligned & Well/Katy Bowman has a DVD called "Down There for Women" to help you tone & strengthen your pelvic floor. Kegels are just a part of the solution (& can make things worse if that's all you do)

Here is a link with more info Stop Doing Kegels: Real Pelvic Floor Advice For Women (and Men) | Breaking Muscle (http://breakingmuscle.com/womens-fitness/stop-doing-kegels-real-pelvic-floor-advice-for-women-and-men)

[atomic sagebrush]

Ooh and also found the gal's blog with tons of good info. Pelvic Floor Stuffs (http://www.katysays.com/category/pelvic-floor-stuffs/)

[May333]

oh wow, that's awesome, I don't think it will hurt to check into that!!

[May333]

I have to agree with the part about our first child being the one who really changes things... I must say, I have only felt different going from no kids to one kid, not really a major difference with #2 and #3. I'm glad women with many many kids are telling me this, I needed to hear it!!

[blueeyedguys]

Atomic, you posted the main link I would have. :) Katy Bowman is the main proponent and I think her research & evidence are pretty solid. And it's great she explains things in easy to understand terms.