Praying for baby girl

[mylittlegirl]

Hi ladies,

been looking thru here for few weeks now. A wealth of information! My story:
I am 43 and I have 3 boys that are everything in the world to me :) My 3rd boy is 11 months old, prior to conceiving him I had 4 miscarriages in a row. Six weeks after the last one I got pregnant with him, boom!! Still trying to figure that out :think: I am very fertile I guess and always got pregnant 1st try and always right thru ovulation. My first lots of BD, 2nd 1 BD, same with 3rd. I never heard of swaying till now and never even knew about shettles either! lol.. My husband has at last agreed to MAYBE try for a girl after a lot of battles.... I won ;) I really have to do this fast and need the best possible chance to get my girl. I am leaning toward the old vinegar douche? Please advise me as I am in a wee bit of a hurry to get started!!
DH & I are both taking ubiquinol 200mg and folic acid(me)

Thank you all in advance!

[nuthinbutpink]

I encourage you to look into swaying a bit more. Our approach is a little more comprehensive than a douche. Good luck!

[mylittlegirl]

Yes I realize it's not that easy but I don't really have luxury of time so to speak to do the diet stuff, so hoping Atomic may be able to give me some advice. She is so well read and researched on this I'm hoping she can offer some options to consider.

[The Anchor]

You should go for the custom plan! It would be perfect for you as your short on time, and atomic will be your personal coach to boot!

[mylittlegirl]

Thanks, I will definitely check it out!

[mylittlegirl]

Hi again

Atomic, do you recommend I purchase a plan to help me or because of my age etc; is there a way to try quickly that may help?

[Pbn3]

Hi my little girl! Welcome to this wonderful site and I hope you get your baby girl. I have 2 boys (love love them) but ache for that mother/daughter bond I have with my mum. I have one chance left and cannot afford ht scenario. I researched the net for hours and hours and more hours trying to find some legitimacy to gender swaying. This was the only site I felt offered realistic results , honesty, caring and everything else in between. You say you don't have time for diet stuff but that is the whole basis of this sites theory. If you could allow yourself even a couple months after either thoroughly researching a le diet or better yet purchasing one (I will be doing this it is so affordable!) I'm sure it would help your sway. I do not believe there's a (quick) fix for trying for a girl. You've waited this long why not give yourself the best chance to conceive a girl by thoroughly researching and/or utilising this site's offers to at least have the satisfaction that you did everything possible to make it happen. I wish you all the best but remember change takes time to take effect so to speak - then again you may just get lucky lol. All the best please feel free to message me if you have amy questions about me/my situation :)

[atomic sagebrush]

We don't use douching much on this site and I would NEVER EVER recommend that for a 43 year old. You just aren't going to get pregnant that way.

Shettles does not work and will cut odds of conception severely. Also would never recommend that for a 43 year old.

I would BD unprotected every 4 days and do diet. Give your husband Olive Leaf extract. That's it.

Continue the Ubiquinol and I would have you taking 4000 mcg folic acid (split into smaller doses and take several times a day) and continue this throughout the first trimester of pregnancy, then gradually wean off.

Once we get over 40 the best approach is to do the things that REALLY work and drop the overly complicated things that do not work and make it very difficult to get pregnant.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi again

Atomic, do you recommend I purchase a plan to help me or because of my age etc; is there a way to try quickly that may help?

The plan is at your discretion, it would take me about a week to do. I would have you do what I outlined above.

[atomic sagebrush]

NO 43 year old should EVER delay TTC for research or any other reason. You never know when it's the last fresh egg in the carton and you need to be in with attempt every month that passes because you only may make 1-2 good eggs a year. Do not skip months at 43 for any reason whatsoever.

[mylittlegirl]

Thanks so much for replying! I would love to hold off on ttc and do the diet but honestly I am 43 and don't think it would be wise for me to wait. I believe our babies choose us and I'm praying and asking that our girl will be next :pray: and of course that we get pregnant. I want a girl like you do, to have that special relationship with just like my mom and I :) I think I am going to just follow my gut instinct and do what feels right for me at the time. Good luck to you too and hope we all get our wish!

[mylittlegirl]

Pbn3, I did reply to your post but I think I forgot to put your name on it , sorry! It was meant for you anyhow and thanks again for the kind response!! :happy:

[mylittlegirl]

Thanks so much for replying Atomic! I do have a few questions for you;

What does olive leaf extract do exactly and how much should he take?

Why 4000mg folic acid?

I know thru reading thru this site that you are against abstain for older men, but I wonder with my hubby taking Ubiquinol daily would abstaining be possible for us as it does improve sperm quality?? If not maybe FR? appreciate your feedback and thank you!

One more question, why BD every 4 days?
Thanks!

[Pbn3]

Hi mylittlegirl! Got your reply thank you :). All the best ttc and sending all positive (pink) vibes your way!!

[maidentomother]

No reason not to start the LE diet immediately and also 60 min cardio daily. Don't put off TTC, but even a little time on the diet + exercise can sway, and if you don't get pregnant right away, you will have more time on the diet which will help sway Pink even more. If you have 3 boys and one from just 1 BD then obviously you/your diet & lifestyle/DH sway strongly blue, and the diet is BY FAR the most important and effective sway tactic. If you really want to shift the odds in favour of pink, the diet is absolutely necessary and I highly recommend the exercise too. Hubby can do both diet & cardio with you as that will sway pink as well. As for BD, every 4 days is best in your case for sure.

I suggest buying the Pink Sway (LE diet) Meal Plan ebook, that way you don't have to learn how the diet works or even understand it, but can just follow the meal plan without having to understand the diet or feel overwhelmed by all the concepts. What is your BMI, how active are you, are you breastfeeding? With that info, we can tell you how many calories you need daily so you can follow the diet properly via the meal plan.

Best of luck!

[mylittlegirl]

Hi, I weighed approx. 125 when I conceived my 1st 2 boys and 130 on my 3rd boy. I walked a lot and rarely eat meat and still don't, chicken now and then but that's it. I ate mostly salads and breads, never liked cereal ever! I also never drank soda too sweet for me, maybe a bad think looking back. I always bd right at ovulation and I believe I conceived my 2nd son the day after I ovulated. I really feel bd at ovulation has a big part in me having all boys... I know a lot wont agree but its my feeling on it.

Also what's the significance of bd every 4 days? I thought I read every 2-4 days to sway boy, I am confused. :think:

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much for replying Atomic! I do have a few questions for you;

What does olive leaf extract do exactly and how much should he take?

Why 4000mg folic acid?

I know thru reading thru this site that you are against abstain for older men, but I wonder with my hubby taking Ubiquinol daily would abstaining be possible for us as it does improve sperm quality?? If not maybe FR? appreciate your feedback and thank you!

One more question, why BD every 4 days?
Thanks!

1) We don't know what it does or honestly if it even works, but it's getting good results. There was a doctor who had some theory about it (unproven) and since it seemed better for conception (vs. cranberry) we started trying it in guys with compromised fertility. WE've gotten good results with it, but it's unclear if it's really due to the OLE, or if it's because lower male fertility = more girls.

2)Better egg quality and possibly lower odds of Down Syndrome and is my recommendation for anyone TTC over the age of 40 (including myself)

3)No, abstain is not advised for this situation firstly because the idea that coq10 could undo the harm of abstain, is like saying flapping your arms can undo gravity. And secondly because both abstain and FR have lousy results (worse than the overall results of the site) and because they drastically reduce odds of conception. YOu need to be in with absolute best odds of conception every month because you may only make 1 good egg a year at 43 and it is silly to let that egg go without being in with the best possible try at catching it. No pregnancy = no baby of either gender.

4)Firstly because this is best for husband to make lots of healthy sperm, and also because that way you ensure regular attempts (so you will not miss ovualtion by miscalculating it or anything) and that there will still only be one attempt in the functional fertile window

[maidentomother]

Mylittlegirl, how tall are you? Do you still walk a lot?

While I think BD every 4 days is best in your situation, if you feel strongly about timing, you could use OPKs and aim for BD 2 days before O, which is best odds of conception and strongly sways pink. I would BD again 4 days later though, just in case it takes you a several days to O after a positive OPK.

[mylittlegirl]

Thanks Atomic, will get the olive extract and up the folic acid. How much ole for hubby? Also, I ovulate on day 13/14 pretty much like clock work every month which is awesome as i can set a cut off time pretty accurately. I did take like 800mg folic acid before and I noticed my ov seemed heavier and more painful, not sure why.

Should he continue the ubiquinol along with ole? I'm worried he might end up with too good a sperm supply = boy sperm :/

I am considering using the vinegar douche( i know you think I'm crazy ) just 1 time and if no good then drop it, I just feel I want to rule it out I guess! I don't want to be afraid to try everything i can just because of my age, I'd rather try something different than before and see :) Thanks for answering my q's I'm sure i'll be bugging you again with more!

[mylittlegirl]

Hi maidentomother, I am 5'6 and no I haven't walked/exercised in over a year! I am a complete wibbly wobbly wonder right now..lol I weigh 139 and am so out of shape.

I am planning a cut off as I ov pretty regular day 13/14. I am strongly considering using a vinegar douche ( i know :) ) as well.

Are cut off days only for swaying pink or are there days besides ovulation day that sway boy, just curious.

Thanks!

[Little Lunasa]

Hi mylittlegirl, welcome and I hope you get your dd. Just wanted to say that I had my baby girl after two boys last July at age 43 so it is totally possible. My advice would be to get a personal plan from Atomic as it takes all the stress out of it. I followed the LE diet loosely for a few months and had one attempt at +opk. Timing/cut offs have been debunked, so dtd every four days is your best chance for getting in one attempt in your fertile window. Good luck!


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[atomic sagebrush]

It is of course your sway and you can have it however you like. I just really want you to understand the absolute lack of scientific data with the timing and pH methods. They just don't add up. If you were younger it woudln't be any big deal if you want to give it a try. But at 43, you may only make 1-2 good eggs in an entire year. IF that happened to occur in the month you were trying with a cutoff and vinegar douche, you may throw away the only opportunity you have EVER at a daughter - because the way fertility works is that those eggs are in steep decline at this point and by the time 6-12 more months have passed, there may not BE any more good eggs left. You have to be in with a chance of conception every month so you can catch Goldie the Golden egg when/if she arrives. YOu really may be throwing away your chance of a daughter on the basis of things that don't even work for swaying.

I'm not trying to be a Negative Nelly, I just want you to make your decisions on the basis of the best available data possible. Timing has been 100% debunked by modern technology, there ARE NO days that sway boy or girl. pH may sway a teensy bit but it's not because X sperm "love" low pH, it's because low pH kills sperm and killing sperm means you are way less likely to conceive at all.

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/7691-trouble-timing.html

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/11684-ph-pickle.html

[atomic sagebrush]

Re OLE and ubiquinol - the primary cause of reduced sperm health is age, by far and away. People play around with this supplement or that one but the unfortunate truth is that the supps really aren't magical and I would think it's perfectly fine for him to take both OLE and ubiquinol. There's just no magic pill tht makes you have boys or girls or even that makes you have healthier sperm. It may help a teensy bit but like I said before, it's like flapping your arms to undo gravity - if it helps, it's only just a little and the age factor is so so much greater.

[maidentomother]

I recommend you eat about 1500 cals daily while following the LE diet. 60+ min of daily cardio will strongly sway pink, too, so I'd start that as well as the diet immediately.

I would never douche, while swaying or otherwise - it is harsh on your vagina, can lead to infections, and just kills sperm (X and Y sperm both). Better to use Rephresh or a pink lube like Sylk than douche. But the best way to change your internal environment to be more pink friendly is to do the diet.

Since like douching, timing also does not sway, I would not normally recommend a cut off. But since I am convinced that you in particular need as close to 3 months on the diet as possible, I think anything you do to limit conception until you've been on the diet longer is good in your case. So rephresh + cut off until you've been on the diet 3 months sounds okay to me, but then after 3 months on the diet, I would switch to BD every 4 days and drop the rephresh.

how do you know for sure that you O on CD 13-14 every month? Do you temp or use OPKs?

[mylittlegirl]

I really cant wait 3 months doing diet, wish I could but my age is a big factor I have to consider, plus my hubby is starting to try and talk me out of it so I have to act soon!

I check my cm regularly when nearing ov and I note the change in consistency, plus I always get pain in my side usually the day prior to ov. Thanks maidentomother for the advice, I really do appreciate it!

[mylittlegirl]

Thanks Atomic, I appreciate all the helpful advice! I am going to consider everything and think long and hard about what I want to do with it all. I also feel a little anxious now as hubby seems less on board.. so I have to work on him too! Will see what the next few months bring, hopefully it will be all PINK x

Thank you!

[maidentomother]

Do you only want a girl? Or would you rather have another son instead of no baby at all?

[mylittlegirl]

Hi Little Lunasa, thanks for replying! I am hopeful and feel confident i'll get pregnant. I want a healthy baby first of course and would be over the moon if its a girl! I wanted to ask did you use any gels/douche or did you abstain etc;... I also just noticed you are in Ireland.... small world, I live in the US but I am from Ireland :) Thanks in advance!

[mylittlegirl]

First and foremost I want a healthy baby. I have 3 amazing sons and I would love an amazing little girl too! I will feel blessed with either if it happens, but will try for a girl.

[maidentomother]

If another baby regardless of gender is your foremost goal, then I'd go straight to BD every 4 days. No cut offs, rephresh, and definitely no douching. But do start the diet & exercise as you may not conceive for months and that way you still can increase your chances of a girl with each day on the diet & exercise, as those are the big sway factors.

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

Atomic - would you say the same to a 38 yr old?? Should I ditch the diet idea?


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[mylittlegirl]

I am going to consider everything and then decide what to do. I have to say I am kinda on the fence about the diet. Just my opinion of course!

My mother told me that her mom, ( my gran ) had 12 kids, her last at age 40 a girl. She was very poor and they were always hungry.. My gran was tiny,smoked but never touched alcohol, and she had 7 boys & 5 girls....

My mother said when she had us she was a meat and potatoes girl, ate basically a boy diet. She had 4 girls( including me) & 2 boys...

I get more confused the more I learn :)

[atomic sagebrush]

every 4 day method is actually getting darn good results anyway - albeit with a small sample size, 12 of 16 people got pink that way. I did too and I don't think I am reflected in those nubmers because my sway was before we started using that method.

[atomic sagebrush]

Atomic - would you say the same to a 38 yr old?? Should I ditch the diet idea?


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???When did I ever tell anyone to ditch diet???

I want everyone to do diet. REgardless of age. Some older gals may do better on atomic fertility diet http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/9052-swaying-under-special-circumstances-part-3-pcos.html I just don't want anyone at the age of 43, think they need to do diet for 12 weeks before TTC. A 38 year old should certainly be cautious not to waste any time, but it's a whole different ball game at 43 (and lest anyone think I am being ageist - I am 44 and had my daugher at 42 so I"m right there with ya.)

[atomic sagebrush]

I am going to consider everything and then decide what to do. I have to say I am kinda on the fence about the diet. Just my opinion of course!

My mother told me that her mom, ( my gran ) had 12 kids, her last at age 40 a girl. She was very poor and they were always hungry.. My gran was tiny,smoked but never touched alcohol, and she had 7 boys & 5 girls....

My mother said when she had us she was a meat and potatoes girl, ate basically a boy diet. She had 4 girls( including me) & 2 boys...

I get more confused the more I learn :)

It is because diet in and of itself, doesn't really sway. Not the way you're thinking of it. IT is maternal condition, overall fertility, and the cues your body gets from the environment. So if a woman was capable of carrying 12 babies including one at age 40, it is pretty clear to me that regardless of being poor, she was apparently in good condition despite that and evidently pretty darn fertile.

pH and timing - no reliable scientific evidence that they sway in any way

diet - tons of reliable evidence that it sways, but no magic bullet, because there ARE no magic bullets.

[Little Lunasa]

Hi Little Lunasa, thanks for replying! I am hopeful and feel confident i'll get pregnant. I want a healthy baby first of course and would be over the moon if its a girl! I wanted to ask did you use any gels/douche or did you abstain etc;... I also just noticed you are in Ireland.... small world, I live in the US but I am from Ireland :) Thanks in advance!

Yes a small world definitely! What part of Ireland are you from?
No I didn't use any gels/douche and we weren't supposed to be abstaining but DH and I hadn't been getting along and our one attempt was 'make up' sex so to speak, as I was flying to Barcelona the next day and I didn't want to leave on a bad note. I actually had given up actively ttc as it had been over 6 months since starting. So it was only when my period was late that I realised I might be pregnant. So what worked for me was: no stressing over ttc, LE diet and one attempt around ovulation.
Xx


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[atomic sagebrush]

Here is a much more thorough explanation of the Trivers Willard hypothesis that may help to alleviate confusion http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/12340-understanding-trivers-willard-hypothesis.html

[maidentomother]

I am going to consider everything and then decide what to do. I have to say I am kinda on the fence about the diet. Just my opinion of course!

My mother told me that her mom, ( my gran ) had 12 kids, her last at age 40 a girl. She was very poor and they were always hungry.. My gran was tiny,smoked but never touched alcohol, and she had 7 boys and 5 girls....

My mother said when she had us she was a meat and potatoes girl, ate basically a boy diet. She had 4 girls( including me) & 2 boys...

I get more confused the more I learn :)

You can't look at other people, even family members, and asssume that bc despite their diets they had a certain gender, that you can too. So many factors can sway and those are only the ones we know about - doubtless hundreds of factors sway to some degree, and many, maybe even most of those factors are ones that can't be changed.

For example, in the case of your gran, she was obviously a very healthy and fertile women to have 12 kids, and we know that both of those things sway boy, so it is not surprising that the children she had more boys, despite poverty and a poor diet. And maybe her DH had high sperm count and they had lots of sex, which also sways blue. Maybe if they'd had more money and food, all their children would have been boys!

As for your mom, who knows what invisible factors inside her body swayed pink. Also, a meat and potatoes diet isn't necessarily healthy and can in certain cases sway pink - for sure potatoes are not a big blue swayer, and maybe she actually mostly ate potatoes and less meat, and small amounts/few meals, thus swaying pink.

Bc you already have 3 boys, it very likely that your body and lifestyle are prone towards having boys, and since Diet & Daily Cardio Exercise are the most powerful swaying tactics we know of, it is most important that you follow them if you really want to change your odds. Some women have only girls or only boys no matter how they eat, but that doesn't mean you personally can get a girl without changing your diet. The success rate of pink swayers (many of whom have 2,3,4 or more boys) who don't do the diet and just do the lazy tactics (supplements, messing with pH, timing) is much, much lower than those who do the diet.

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

???When did I ever tell anyone to ditch diet???

I want everyone to do diet. REgardless of age. Some older gals may do better on atomic fertility diet http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/9052-swaying-under-special-circumstances-part-3-pcos.html I just don't want anyone at the age of 43, think they need to do diet for 12 weeks before TTC. A 38 year old should certainly be cautious not to waste any time, but it's a whole different ball game at 43 (and lest anyone think I am being ageist - I am 44 and had my daugher at 42 so I"m right there with ya.)

I just meant the diet over a stretch of time like this woman. I should have been more clear is suppose.



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[mylittlegirl]

Atomic do I start bd right after AF and then again in 4 days? :think: and still try a cut off? I really am afraid to get too close again to OV time.. just stuck in my mind! And go complete vegetarian for the next few weeks/months do you really think that's enough?

No abstain or FR or gels/douche ...nothing. Any supplements for me?

[mylittlegirl]

I'm originally from Kilkenny and you? :)

Gosh I hope its that easy for me :suprise: Do you remember how long you actually abstained and did you take any supplements etc;? Sorry for being so nosy :oops: just trying to get as much info as possible! Thanks!!! And super nice to have to someone from the Old Country on here :)

[Little Lunasa]

I'm originally from Kilkenny and you? :)

Gosh I hope its that easy for me :suprise: Do you remember how long you actually abstained and did you take any supplements etc;? Sorry for being so nosy :oops: just trying to get as much info as possible! Thanks!!! And super nice to have to someone from the Old Country on here :)

Originally from Kildare but living in Waterford now. Atomic had actually recommended my dh not to abstain due to his age (45), and to have him release every 2-4 days. It just happened that he abstained due to us arguing lol He was taking olive leaf extract and I was on high dose folic acid and CoQ 10 (to improve egg quality).


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[Little Lunasa]

Atomic do I start bd right after AF and then again in 4 days? :think: and still try a cut off? I really am afraid to get too close again to OV time.. just stuck in my mind! And go complete vegetarian for the next few weeks/months do you really think that's enough?

No abstain or FR or gels/douche ...nothing. Any supplements for me?

Try forget about the timing, the research shows it really doesn't make any difference. What is helping achieve great pink results is having only one attempt, and the night of +opk seems to work well :)


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[mylittlegirl]

Thanks so much, that makes me feel a bit more confident! I'm already taking ubiquinol and folic acid just need to add the olive leaf extract like atomic suggested, just not sure how much yet.

I also lived/worked in Waterford way back :)

[atomic sagebrush]

if using liquid ole use dose on bottle (they vary) if using dry leaf, 500-1000 mg.

[mylittlegirl]

Thank You! :)

[mylittlegirl]

Maidentomother, reading your post again and where you suggest I use rephresh + cut off for some time first. Do I use protection up to cut off during that time?

[atomic sagebrush]

IF you must do cutoff, you should use protection for every attempt in fertile window that could possibly get you pregnant, except for the ONE attempt closest to ovuation.

[maidentomother]

What atomic said! But I only recommend a cut off + rephresh at all if you want just a girl, not another baby regardless of gender.