When's best to have a third!?

[WISHING4AGIRL]

When's best to have a third?

I have a 5 year old & nearly 3 old, and we'd like a third. We can't decide when is best though, and I would really like opinions on those who have 3! I know there's never really a "perfect" time to have a baby, but in your experience what's worked for you? We were originally going to start TTC April next year, but now we're thinking of prolonging it until our youngest starts school (September 2016) just so my two are at school & I'll have just the baby to worry about at home - have/did you find it easier with both children at school and a baby at home, or do you think it doesn't make much difference. It's also hard, because you can't choose when you conceive either.

Any advice/experiences will be appreciated. Thank you!!!

[nuthinbutpink]

I think when your older 2 start doing after school stuff and you have a baby that is forced to live in the car, it's hard. I think it's easier to have the third while another is already home with home and you have less places to be! Also, I like having them a little close in age so they play with one another. 3 years apart is what we did. That's worked well.

[WISHING4AGIRL]

Thanks nuthinbutpink. Luckily, the school is pretty much next door to us so doing the school run & after school clubs, shouldn't be too much of a problem. Thanks for your comment. Hopefully, I can make a decision soon. My husband thinks having my two sons at school will make life easier for me, instead of having my youngest at home still, with a newborn baby.

[atomic sagebrush]

While I can't answer this totally, I do want to point out that you never know, it may take you longer to get pregnant than you think and so I wouldn't wait TOO long - I hate to see people wait and wait for some perfect timing and then end up taking an additional year to get pregnant (which happens all the time)

[WISHING4AGIRL]

This is what I've been thinking Atomic! We're going to have a chat tonight & see what we thinks best. It took us 4/5 months to get pregnant, so I would like to try maybe 6 months prior to when we would "like" to conceive, but obviously you cant pinpoint that & it could take even longer!

[XXforhubby]

I second what Atomic said! We are trying for our third (hopefully a girl!) and we originally wanted to conceive this past August. I never had trouble conceiving before, so I never thought it would take long. While 5 months may not seem long to some- it has to us. I would try whenever you and DH are both on board, because you just don't know how long it will take!


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[kitkat18]

I too agree, it took me a lot longer than I expected and we are having our third with DS2 almost five, so quite a big age gap X

[Nahri]

I wanted closer to a 2 year age gap myself but ended up with a 3 and possibly 2 month age gap depending on how close to the EDD baby is born. I used this list as I only have one child and it has a good list of POSSIBLE pros and cons. Dont take them as gospel obviously but its a neat little list and some of them like social activities between siblings as well as the load of what needs you have to provide for them are pretty realistic. For us the biggest thing was how self sufficent is DS already walking alone, feeding himself, and on the way out of diapers were our biggies because of my physical problems. The Alpha Parent: What no one tells you about child spacing (http://www.thealphaparent.com/2012/07/what-no-one-tells-you-about-child.html)

[Pink rose 76]

I think a closer age gap would be nice. We started our journey for our DD wen our youngest was 2 and older one nearly 5. Now youngest is 4.5 and eldest 7 and we still haven't got our third. Although we have done HT, then swayed and now been trying Ht. I'm off again for another try in January so if is works my youngest will be 5.5 years. Not ideal but he's great anyway with younger kids and loves babies still.

I agree with you tho that mine are both in school so will make life easier with just one at home to concentrate fully on. Mine both have after school activities together so not too much running around.

Good luck with your decision.

[WISHING4AGIRL]

Thank you, for your responses ladies. I'm still waiting to have a chat with my husband about it. We both really want one, it's just deciding on the right time. But I do also think there's never really a right time, and what will be will be!

[Dana-Alicia]

You're right, there never is a right time. Personally I would love my kids closer together in age, but I'm horrible at being pregnant and will prob be hospitalized again and I need my kids to be a bit more independent when that happens. I will not be able to pick them up, carry them, bath them, dress them, they will need to do that themselves. So sadly have to wait till my youngest is in school, so I don't need constant daycare for him and he is able to take care of himself with my supervision from the couch/bed. But if it wasn't for that, I'd be pregnant now! It really depends on what is best for your family and especially the kids you have now.