Nervous...??

[jennibel]

I am hoping to sway pink sometime in 2012, I am gathering information as much as I can and getting everything ready for my sway. But I can't help but feel super nervous about it all when I actually start TTC. And then if I have a gender scan (if I am blessed with a BFP) I will be so nervous. This will be our third and last child and I so desperately want to hear pink. I know that a sway can help with the odds but part of me just can't imagine getting a pink one. I want to give it my all but worried that my all still wont be enough and I will end up super disappointed. Am I the only one who feels this way?

[atomic sagebrush]

No, you're NOT alone at all!!!

I know others will chime in here but I just want to let you know that it is possible to have horrible GD and get opposites not once but twice and yet still get over it. Life goes on and I actually want a 5th boy now!! GD does not have to be a life sentence.

Swaying will never be anywhere close to a guarantee unfortunately, even though we're finding new info every day. My philosophy towards swaying always was that if I did nothing, I was swaying boy jsut because my normal diet and lifestyle were boy friendly. So I really swayed with the attitude that if swaying could get me to 50-50, then I would take the flip of the coin at that point.

Anyway, welcome and I wish you the very best...I'll be here to help in any way I can!!

[lena]

No you are not the only one. This could be our last child (although I am hopig for another 1 we'll see). We are currently ttcing and even though I say I wouldn't be as upset as I was last time when I found out the sex of DS (which I don't think I will I wouldn't change my boys ever) I don't know if I am just telling myself that and as soon as that gender scan comes up all that might go out the window. Does that make sense?

[Sassy]

Not at all!!!! I'm 2.5 wks away from my first attempt and have been researching for months and months. Now that I'm so close, I'm even more nervous. I'm worried I'll have busted my gut and won't end up with my DG. This will be our last PG too so I understand how you're feeling. But like Atomic, I figure all I can do is my best and if it doesn't work then it wasn't meant to be!

[Mochagirl]

This is our 4th and definitely our last, and yes, I'm scared to death! I keep thinking, though, how I cried for 2 days when I found out ds3 was a boy, then on the third day I started to feel better. Now that I have him, I couldn't imagine life without him, and I'm glad he decided to join our family. I just want to have no regrets this time. I want to feel like I did my best sway, and if I still end up with a boy I'll figure my body only makes boys and try to move on with my life.

[swish]

I think there are ALOT of us who cannot imagine being successful in this process but I feel if i don't try then there is no chance and this way I have some chance. Good luck and we're all here to support you!!

[jennibel]

Thanks everyone, at least I feel I'm not alone. I think with going for a third and having another of the same sex my biggest fear is GD and never getting over that longing for pink. I also fear other peoples reactions in thinking/presuming I am going for a girl, and I feel that there will be pressure from family and friends to have a pink one after two blue. Its a funny thing though as I see myself as a mom of boys now anyway so the other part of me cant imagine having a pink lol! Like you say though at least with swaying I will feel I am upping my chances of more 50/50. Just worried that my hopes will be raised too far

[zanacal]

I could have written any one of these posts! I actually can't believe I've convinced DH to ttc#4 but here we are - no doubt about to make boy #4 :D I at least feel I have the best information and research here so I know I'll be doing what I can, I'm so glad I didn't just go with Shettles and then find this out after because I don't think either DH or I could handle 5 little ones!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks everyone, at least I feel I'm not alone. I think with going for a third and having another of the same sex my biggest fear is GD and never getting over that longing for pink. I also fear other peoples reactions in thinking/presuming I am going for a girl, and I feel that there will be pressure from family and friends to have a pink one after two blue. Its a funny thing though as I see myself as a mom of boys now anyway so the other part of me cant imagine having a pink lol! Like you say though at least with swaying I will feel I am upping my chances of more 50/50. Just worried that my hopes will be raised too far

I won't lie to you, it isn't always an easy road to walk and I have good days and bad days and I suspect I always will. I have gotten a lot of s#!t comments from family and neighbors that have not made the process any easier but at some point (if you DO get an opposite) you can let it destroy your life or you can rise above it and take pleasure in what is, rather than what "should" have been.

[dramabird]

Jennibel, I just about could have written your post! We have two boys and a third baby will be our last (barring twins or an oops, neither DH or I see ourselves as a four-child family).

One decision I think I have pretty finalized is a strategy for the gender ultrasound, which we *will* have this time (we waited until delivery to find out for our first two, so this time I'd like to know in advance ... I loved my second son the instant he was placed in my arms, but I still bawled that there was no daughter, and dealing with GD and post-partum hormones and lack of sleep was an unhappy combo!).

So, rather than having the tech just say "It's a boy" or "It's a girl," I'm going to provide a card with our two name choices. Because even if a person were to have the same gender again, by having an assigned name, rather than just hearing "It's a boy," it'll hopefully be more tender and personal. Early bonding could be easier with a "Seth" or a "Luke" or whatnot, rather than just generic "boy" ... and hopefully help a mom struggling with GD to envision an individual who will be ever so much more than his gender. Am I making sense? I feel a bit rambling ... :)

[Mochagirl]

I think that's a really nice idea, dramabird! I had the same regret with my twins - we decided to wait until the birth, and so my first memory of ds1 is of me thinking "A boy? I really wanted them to be girls...". Of course I fell in love with he and his brother quickly afterwards, but I'll always have the guilt of the brief moment of sadness when I should have been nothing but happy. We found out the gender with ds3, and I'm fairly sure I will this time around too.

[pinkdreams]

I am right there with you too! One moment I feel great about the sway and feeling like I am trying to do something about it and then the next moment I am so afraid to find out (after a BFP that is ;) if I am having another boy and this is my last one too! I just try to be optimistic and rely on the faith that what is meant to be will be and I remember how devastated I was when my ultrasound with DS 2 revealed another boy, but now that he is 2 and his little personality is really starting to come out I couldn't love him more. He is an absolute sweetheart and I am so glad he is who he is. I feel like this next one will be a girl because as corny as it sounds I see her in my dreams and I can't wait to meet her but if I do have another son I will hopefully rest assured in the thought that I gave my sway 110% and it just wasn't meant to be. Best of luck to you!!

[atomic sagebrush]

The funny thing that many of us realize is that it's the possibility and the hope that makes the GD so bad. The reality is never as bad as the fear. When we finally decide to be done and accept the all-boy family as our own, the GD really lifts. Buddhists say, "Desire is the root of all unhappiness" and it does seem to be true where GD is concerned.