melissalynay
September 21st, 2011, 09:05 PM
If you would have asked me 9 years ago if I would have three boys I would have laughed at you and said no I am having one boy and one girl....Why can't life work the way I want it to.
I always imagined 2 kids but when DS#2 was born I though its ok I will just have one more. I never thought DS#3 could be anything but a girl I mean the odds had to be in my favor right....Wrong was I.
So here I am again but this time planning to sway as mother nature doesn't see that my family is off balance. 4 kids oh my gosh can I really handle another one. But that Gender desire keeps me producing them. I know that this one can be another boy but the thought of just maybe having another chance at a girl keeps my dream alive. All odds says it will be another boy but what if it isn't...I find my self pleading with god to please make me a princess....What am I not good enough to be the mother of a DD....My mother was horrible and so was my childhood enough to where I don't talk to her anymore....
All I want is that mother daughter bond so why is it the almost impossible dream, why do I keep spitting out children I never intended to have just to fulfill this need....It is almost like I drug.
Ok, so I am done with that rant. I would like to point out I love my three boys....There are my everything and am very blessed they are in my life I just wish they had a little sister to share....So here I go for the last time, fingers crossed that its my turn. Thanks for listening.
Mommy to three (ages 9,4, and 1 year).......:bigboy:
Hoping and praying to add my sweet baby:babygirl:
Please lord grant me this one wish....the desire is so deep in my heart!!!
I always imagined 2 kids but when DS#2 was born I though its ok I will just have one more. I never thought DS#3 could be anything but a girl I mean the odds had to be in my favor right....Wrong was I.
So here I am again but this time planning to sway as mother nature doesn't see that my family is off balance. 4 kids oh my gosh can I really handle another one. But that Gender desire keeps me producing them. I know that this one can be another boy but the thought of just maybe having another chance at a girl keeps my dream alive. All odds says it will be another boy but what if it isn't...I find my self pleading with god to please make me a princess....What am I not good enough to be the mother of a DD....My mother was horrible and so was my childhood enough to where I don't talk to her anymore....
All I want is that mother daughter bond so why is it the almost impossible dream, why do I keep spitting out children I never intended to have just to fulfill this need....It is almost like I drug.
Ok, so I am done with that rant. I would like to point out I love my three boys....There are my everything and am very blessed they are in my life I just wish they had a little sister to share....So here I go for the last time, fingers crossed that its my turn. Thanks for listening.
Mommy to three (ages 9,4, and 1 year).......:bigboy:
Hoping and praying to add my sweet baby:babygirl:
Please lord grant me this one wish....the desire is so deep in my heart!!!