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[Complex Emotions]

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[Dreamsister]

Dear CE. Thanks for sharing. I understand your concerns but if I was you I would care less about a perfect sway and gender. Personally I think it is more important to give your son a sibling close in age than waiting for the right month or condition. I would try to loosen up on your strict sway, eat more healthy food, relax, have faith that your body know how to get pregnant. You still have a very good shot at pink bc you are vegetarian and at a very low BMI.


DS1 (9) ❤️ DS2 (8) [emoji173] DS3 (5) ❤️ DW (41) [emoji1326] DH (38) [emoji144] TTC'ing pink from May 2016

[Girlieplease]

I agree with dream sister, obsessing over sway, sways blue. I would try and relax as much as possible, you could have the most perfect sway ever and still get a boy or do bare minimum girl sway and get a girl. My timing was pretty spot on last month and I still did not get pregnant, there is still so much chance and so much that is beyond your control in relation to conception and pregnancy. Good luck!

[MrsGoodies]

I know how hard it is to sway girl and not give stuff up.

When I was 36 i was on the girl diet for 6 monyths and couldnt get pg so i kept inching closer and closer to O. Got pg = boy #3

When I was 41 i accidentally gt pg on a rest cycle before an IVF 3-4 days before O. I was not on the diet at all. I was eating healthy and doing everything I could to prepare for the IVF. I got PG and that = twin boys

After all hitech failed and I and nothing left to lose i decided to try one more sway for a girl. I had the diet and timing correct = girl but i lost that pg.

Now i am desperate to be pg again but i cant seem to drop a single thing bc I have done so in the past and everytime i dropped something the sway failed.

I think if i really didnt care about gender i would just go ahead. But if you will be crushed by giving your son a BROTHER close in age, then give your sway the best shot you can or you will be kicking yourself and regretting it.

You do have time to ttc #3 if you get pg quickly again with another boy.

For me this is my very last chance so that is why i must be so strict. I've tried everything else.

[atomic sagebrush]

I already responded to your yeast infection question in the other thread but long story short, no, I don't really recommend that, it was based on one of the earliest essays in the history of the site and back when I was still trying to incorporate the old-school sway advice that I now have the leeway not to. :)

atomic tough love warning.

Here is the thing. Your options are as follows. Give up SOME of this stuff that is making you miserable and not helping anyway, or giving up ALL of it. To me, it makes no sense to infinity and beyond to be torn between continuing things like sodium limits or just giving up swaying totally. We have sooo much wiggle room between these two extremes. I think you are singling out things like the seasons as an excuse to focus in on so you can give up swaying with some sort of reasoning in your mind. I can guarantee you the reason why you got a boy with your first pregnancy was not because you conceived in October.

It also doesn't make any sense to be on the one hand consumed with health and concerns about arsenic and rice and being 35 then allowing your weight to drop so low. If you're concerned with your health and ability to get and stay pregnant then the absolute first thing you need to do is EAT MORE. Limiting sodium is another thing that has recently been shown to be potentially harmful and you've been doing it for so long - again it doesn't mesh with being concerned about health on one hand and doing something that may harm health on the other.

Does it even make sense that upping intake of full fat dairy to one serving a day will make you have twins??

Additionally, and I hesitate to even mention this because I know it's really not controllable, all this plotting and planning you're doing with this back and forth pros and cons is 110% swaying blue more than anything like sodium, full fat dairy, TTC in a certain month.

Here is what I think is happening, and it isn't just you, it's many pink swayers. We are prone to "worst first" thinking. So in every instance, your mind is jumping to the absolutely worst case scenario and you are allowing those fears to mess with your head and affect your decisionmaking process.

"A yeast infection means I have to skip a month"
"If I eat salt my sway will fail"
"If I eat dairy I will have twins"
"If I eat rice I am poisoning myself with arsenic"
"If I don't get pregnant in a certain month my sway will fail"
"Since I'm over 35 my eggs are not healthy"
"If there is too large an age gap my family I always dreamed of will be ruined"

See how all these things are absolutely worst case scenario?? And furthermore do you see how they simply cannot be true?? (and certainly not all of them simultaneously! that would be like a meteor falling from the sky directly onto a lottery winner right when they got struck by lightning) We have tons of people who have done ALL these things "wrong" and still gotten healthy babies and girls. I TTC 3 times over the age of 35, I ate salt when I got my DD, I ate full fat dairy and did not have twins, and in fact the time I did conceive twins I was NOT eating full fat dairy!, I got my daughter in a boy month, and I have a THIRTEEN year age gap between DS 1/2 and then my younger three. My family wasn't ruined, is it exactly like I dreamed of, no, but then again we don't get to have things exactly like we dreamed of in this world. Sometimes things being different than we hoped is not a catastrophe, it's a pleasant surprise that we didn't even envision!

It is obvious that swaying does mess with your head. Ok. The solution is to come up with a way for that not to happen. And that hinges on simplicity and putting things on autopilot and compromising in favor of doing the things that really work, letting go of the things that don't and/or cut odds of conception by a lot. To come this far, do everything you've done, only to give up without even TRYING to compromise, may be something you will end up regretting in the long run and I think you should at least give it a shot and see if you can find a sweet spot where you're still swaying without it messing with your head so much. (I also think you're still going to be having it mess with your head even if you officially give up on it, and that is why you're focusing on the seasons as still possibly swaying even when you believe you are giving up, but I digress)

Simple sway:

Vegetarian but stop weight loss and RELAX on the sodium!! No more limiting sodium, it's not good for you in the long term anyway and it makes it astronomically harder to stick with diet. NO more counting calories or protein or fat. Throw all that away.

Exercise if you can. If you can't, drop it.

Have unprotected sex every four days with or without one additional attempt either at positive OPK or when you think you're ovulating (if you have any inkling when this is; if not, wait till your sex drive is high and act on that.) You don't HAVE to have that additional attempt if you prefer not to. Another option instead would be to go to every 3 days and forgo the stress of OPK or guessing if you're about to O. That is ok too.

And...that's it. In the meantime, take your little boy out and about to the park or Chuck E Cheeses or to see Finding Dory or wherever and enjoy being a mom!!

[MrsGoodies]

There you go again with all of that perfect reasoning Atomic! Lol

To the OP, everything Atomic said makes sense. You dont need to drop 100%.

I think it is a lot harder when you have never made a girl before to know what would and would not work as far as swaying goes. For Atomic what worked for her was doing opposite of how she got her sons....for me it was sticking with a strict sway and not dropping diet OR timing.

My problem has always been impatience and questioning if this is reaaaaaallly necessary whilst staring down a plate of steak & fries....

Fwiw, i KNOW for a fact that it is possible for me to have 1-2 cheat days every month and *still* conceive a girl. I made her a few days after christmas...after i spent all if christmas eve/day eating turkey, gravy and all of the sweet, salty, ufatty foods you can imagine... I started up on diet again on Dec 26....O on Dec 29-30....

I was on the diet for 4 months but my christmas cheat made no difference at all.

Believe me i was terrified and beating myself up like crazy when i saw the BFP but it was a girl.

I actually made a GIRL...a first for me ever in my life!

Now i just need to reproduce it.

You will find out what works for you eventually.

[Complex Emotions]

MrsGoodies - I'm so very sorry that you lost your daughter during your pregnancy. I can't imagine how that would feel.

[atomic sagebrush]

Just to clarify, I most certainly did NOT do the opposite of everything that I did when I got my sons. In fact I'd say my diet with DS 2 was a pretty LE type diet but I still got a boy with him anyway.

I do not believe in "doing the opposite" and do not ever recommend it as a sway approach at all because invariably people focus on "doing the opposite" on things that had nothing to do with why they got girls and in fact even things that may have been swaying pink. That's right, people end up doing the opposite on things that were actually swaying pink to begin with. When you come into swaying 80% likely to have a boy, and then this one thing you did swayed pink, even if it was a huge % like 20%, you still end up 60% likely to have a boy. So focusing on that thing (or a series of things) and then doing the opposite on them will simply do nothing other than undermining your sway!

The problem with sticking to a strict sway is that time after time, these are the people who have opposites with otherwise great sways. I know people who swayed strictly for 2 years (and I'm not making this up) only to get an opposite. If perfection made successful sways I'd be down with it even if it does reduce odds of conception, but IT DOESN'T. I know the assumption is that I compromise on swaying in favor of safety/quick time to conception but that simply isn't the case, the #1 reason I hate the superstrict sways with the insane level of details to everything is because they DO NOT WORK. :)

[atomic sagebrush]

Phew! Thank you so much Atomic. Your suggestions for compromise do make a lot of sense. I have been taking tiny baby steps this month, like eating after a twelve hour fast instead of fourteen or more hours. I'm also eating four times a day instead of three. After I saw your post I even tried eating a little more salt while thinking mantra style "Doing this will help your body be able to have a healthy baby."

I'm not able to do everything you've suggested, at least not right away. But I promise that I am thinking seriously about it.

Also, my son and husband and I are having a wonderful summer together so far. I know you wouldn't guess it from the venting I do here, but despite the GD baggage, we are a very close and happy family.

I actually DO guess that and I hope all you guys realize that I do well and truly know that none of this sway jazz has anything to do with the love and enjoyment we have for our sons and everything to do with that dream that we've had many of us since we were tiny little girls.

[MrsGoodies]

Just to clarify, I most certainly did NOT do the opposite of everything that I did when I got my sons. In fact I'd say my diet with DS 2 was a pretty LE type diet but I still got a boy with him anyway.

I do not believe in "doing the opposite" and do not ever recommend it as a sway approach at all because invariably people focus on "doing the opposite" on things that had nothing to do with why they got girls and in fact even things that may have been swaying pink. That's right, people end up doing the opposite on things that were actually swaying pink to begin with. When you come into swaying 80% likely to have a boy, and then this one thing you did swayed pink, even if it was a huge % like 20%, you still end up 60% likely to have a boy. So focusing on that thing (or a series of things) and then doing the opposite on them will simply do nothing other than undermining your sway!

The problem with sticking to a strict sway is that time after time, these are the people who have opposites with otherwise great sways. I know people who swayed strictly for 2 years (and I'm not making this up) only to get an opposite. If perfection made successful sways I'd be down with it even if it does reduce odds of conception, but IT DOESN'T. I know the assumption is that I compromise on swaying in favor of safety/quick time to conception but that simply isn't the case, the #1 reason I hate the superstrict sways with the insane level of details to everything is because they DO NOT WORK. :)

Are you saying you didnt do the opposite with your girl? I guess I'm confused b/c with one of your sons you were on heavy calcium/mag supplements & lots of dairy and with your DD you dropped all that & were eating salty food?

If you didnt think any of that had anything to do with swaying, why mention it at all and just say she was conceived with plain old luck?

Now I am totally confused as to what things you believe sway girl (if any)?

[XXforhubby]

I think the confusion lays with what you believe to sway girl.

Old school girl sway tactics were cal/mag and dairy heavy while limiting salt.

She got her DD following the LE diet and one attempt. She inadvertently limited dairy due to family illness, stress, and low funds. She didn't set out to limit this, it was just a by product of her circumstances. In fact, she mentioned she got a DS while eating gobs of dairy and cal/mag and limiting salt.

The point is don't do the opposite because it doesn't work that way. You need to do LE diet and one attempt. Exercise, alcohol, coffee, and fiber all help to achieve a lower maternal condition. That is what Atomic did and what others have done intentionally or not to get a DD.



[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[atomic sagebrush]

I did not do that "because I did the opposite". I did that because scientific evidence proved to me that those things do not sway (and in fact possibly sway in the wrong direction from what the old-school sway gurus claim). Me eating a lot of salt with my daughter had NOTHING to do with swaying, it was a matter of convenience and because my research proved unequivocally that mineral levels cannot sway in the way the mineral diets claim (because calcium and sodium are in homeostasis in the human body and the levels CANNOT be changed.

Not "doing the opposite". Following biological fact and scientific research.

TRust me there was PLENTY of stuff I did exacty the same as my boys (including the sodium thing because I got at least 1 of my boys eating rather a lot of sodium as well.) If the facts would have proved to me that calcium swayed pink for reals, I would have took it again. But it didn't and so I didn't take it. I was not ever trying to "do the opposite". I was trying to get a daughter and thus I did what my research indicated was the best way to go about that. If the research had shown me that the best odds were doing exactly what I did in my failed sway with DS 4 I would have done that.

Maternal condition and overall fertility, plus cues from the diet and environment about what gender baby has a better chance of surviving to adulthood to pass down genes is what sways. Following a certain diet is a means to an end of SLIGHTLY lowering one's condition and overall fertility and about what gender baby has the best shot, while still leaving us able to get and stay pregnant. All this diet stuff is with that in mind. The diet is not "eat magic foods to make girls" it is meant to generally lower your condition and fertility just a teensy bit and indicate that a girl may have a better shot than a boy does. Even the number of attempts is to send a certain message to the body. It's ALL to send a message to the body and then your body decides what to do with that. It may ignore it and make a boy anyway, or it may be getting so many other messages from other things (like for example being a total control freak) that it may make a boy because it still thinks a boy has a better chance.

LE Diet plus coffee, fiber, alcohol; exercise 60 min. 6-7 days a week, one attempt (or every 4 days) is what sways. Look at what works for most people most of the time, and what the science says, and DO THAT. Don't "do the opposite" because that may not have anything to do with why you got a boy OR it may have even HELPED up your odds of getting a girl but it just didn't go your way.

[atomic sagebrush]

:agree: Thanks XX. I got ALL FOUR of my boys doing tons of dairy and DS 3 and 4 I was taking cal-mag supps in addition. But that is NOT why I dropped them to get a girl, it's because the scientific evidence showed to me that the mineral diets were nonsense and couldn't possibly be true (and plus I was flat ass broke to boot LOL) If the evidence had showed me it worked, I would have done it again because I would then know that was the best chance I had.

My life story is not meant to say "see how I did the opposite" but it is meant instead to say "see how you CAN get boys with cal-mag and girls without it?" Does that make any sense??

Do what works for most of the people, most of the time, and has the most reliable science backing it up. That's the key. Don't do the opposite. :)

[MrsGoodies]

LE Diet plus coffee, fiber, alcohol; exercise 60 min. 6-7 days a week, one attempt (or every 4 days) is what sways. Look at what works for most people most of the time, and what the science says, and DO THAT.

What sample size are you using to base that all of the above sways girl?

Is it based on what personally worked for you?

Genderdreaming sway spreadsheet?

Some scientific study somewhere?


I know swaying isn't 100% but I'd be interested in knowingjust how many women did the above and got the desired result?

[XXforhubby]

Our stats. Stats from the Trivers Willard hypothesis.



[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[Erin514]

Mrs. Goodies, aside from the sway stats that you can find on this site in the ttc girl forum, which are "just for fun" in that they can give an idea of what's working but aren't a scientific study with a control group, Atomic also links to relevant studies in several of her essays and there are links to scientific papers in the members section. Even if you're not a member, if you read the essay on maternal dominance and the essays on LE diet, or do a search for "you are what your mother eats" or "Harvard nurses" study, they'll come up. A lot of the studies are easy to track down on Google if you don't see a link in one of Atomic's essays.

[1moregirl]

Just for the record, I don't believe that being vegetarian completely contributes to swaying girl. I have one sister who has been a strict vegetarian for most of her adult life and her first 3 children were boys. Her and her DH took up a few sway tactics to try and get a DD, which they did successfully for their fourth and final child. I don't think it's healthy for ANY sway to get so caught up and obsessive about what you eat and how many calories are in this or that....this sort of thinking can easily lead to an eating disorder for a start.

[MrsGoodies]

Complex emotions,

Wishing you luck whatever you decide :flowerz:

[Erin514]

Regarding vegetarianism, I really believe that it must sway because vegetarians often have lower ratios of fat (especially saturated fat) and protein in their diets. I was a vegetarian with my DS2 (failed sway based on French gender diet), but I was eating MASSIVE amounts of full-fat diary and nuts for calcium and magnesium. I'm sure my fat and protein were even higher than if I'd been eating meat. Now that I know more about swaying, I limit dairy and nuts and my totals are much, much lower.

This shows there are different kinds of vegetarianism. The only culture I'm aware of that is truly vegetarian as a rule are followers of the Hindu religion, and Indian food tends to have a lot of ghee, paneer (both high in dairy fat), pulses like lentils and chickpeas, so I'm sure a typical diet has a fair bit of saturated fat and protein that would offset any pink sway in the vegetarian diet alone. Contrast that to a vegetarian in a Western culture, who will likely (but not always) be eating a lot more carbs, particularly empty carbs, to make up the calories not taken by meat.

This would explain why there are studies that show vegetarians have more girls even though we still see lots of boys born to largely vegetation society in India (where selective abortion is also a factor).

[atomic sagebrush]

What sample size are you using to base that all of the above sways girl?

Is it based on what personally worked for you?

Genderdreaming sway spreadsheet?

Some scientific study somewhere?


I know swaying isn't 100% but I'd be interested in knowingjust how many women did the above and got the desired result?

First of all about 1000 studies and books that I have read since I started this quest in 2008. Studies in humans and animals alike and theories dating back 50 years that are widely accepted by "real" scientists - including studies that show vegetarians have more daughters and that XX embryos grow better than XY in differing amounts of glucose, just as a couple of examples.

Also, the realities of human biology which absolutely disprove many of the claims made by the "old-school" sway gurus.

Additionally, the 3 years I was on Ingender watching people succeed and get opposites with swaying.

Subsequently, the 4 years that this site has been up and running and we've been tracking our stats since then and also the inverses which we tracked that showed the stuff that isn't working. THings that have the same success rate as the overall results of the site, and then the % of people who get opposites and successes are also identical, indicates that these things are not working.

We get between 65-75% success rates depending on the methods used with a pretty substantial sample size by this stage of the game. Some things have bigger samples than other things just because they're older or more people use them. You can find that here http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/51473-new-complete-pink-swaying-statistics-spreadsheet-info-links.html#post756135 and just in the interest of saving time for those who don't click links,, LE Diet longer than 12 weeks has between 70-75% success rates, that exercise has 75% success rates, one attempt and every 4 day method between 70-75%. Fiber 68%, alcohol 76%, lots of caffeine in the form of coffee 87.5 (but smaller sample)

[atomic sagebrush]

Just for the record, I don't believe that being vegetarian completely contributes to swaying girl. I have one sister who has been a strict vegetarian for most of her adult life and her first 3 children were boys. Her and her DH took up a few sway tactics to try and get a DD, which they did successfully for their fourth and final child. I don't think it's healthy for ANY sway to get so caught up and obsessive about what you eat and how many calories are in this or that....this sort of thinking can easily lead to an eating disorder for a start.


The primary reason I have people track nutrient intake is to be sure they get ENOUGH. I don't let people with eating disorders track at all for this very reason. So I'm not sure if this is a justification for you not tracking or reassurance to the previous poster or a dig at me but if it is the latter it is not warranted because I have worked very hard to stop the atmosphere of eating disorders that were endemic on the diets that are nothing but dry spaghetti and rice cakes.

Let me explain something about swaying, at least the way we do it here on this site. It is not a guarantee of gender if you do everything "right" enough. It is not "BD on this day and you'll have a girl" or "if your pH is this then you'll get a girl". It is that maternal condition and overall fertility plus cues from the environment send signal to your body about what gender baby has a better shot. So a person can do everything right off the blue sway plan and still get a girl if their body gets those signals from elsewhere or if their condition or fertility is more "pink" and vice versa. Swaying in and of itself isn't swaying, swaying is sending a message to your body and then your body does the swaying. Diet is one way we send that message but there are many many others.

A person who's a vegetarian absolutely totally and completely can get boys. I have had many successful vegetarian blue swayers who got boys eating a more HE type diet. OF COURSE being a vegetarian doesn't completely contribue to a sway. NOTHING completely contributes to a sway. That is why I am jumping up and down foaming at the mouth today telling you guys not to go over your calendars from 6 years ago looking for the "magic BD pattern" because it has nothing to do with why you got a boy or girl. It is a thousand things working together most of which we cannot even see. All we are trying to do here is follow the best data at our disposal to send that signal that it's "girly time".

I know it's more comforting to hear something like "if you take enough calcium and quit eating salt you automatically get a girl" because it's easy, it's ssimple, you can wrap your head around it, it's like hearing "take shark cartilage to prevent cancer" but it doesn't work. Our way is harder, harder to do and to understand, and less "sexy" sounding but at least it's the truth. Eat right, diet, exercise, don't smoke, you probably won't get cancer, shark cartilage or no, but it's not a guarantee that you won't because maybe you didn't always eat right, maybe you have genetics that make it more likely for you to have cancer, maybe you were exposed to secondhand smoke, maybe you drink too much at the same time or whatever. The human body is like a hurricane, a bunch of things working in concert and some of those things go back to when you were in your mother's womb probably even, plus sheer dumb luck.

[atomic sagebrush]

I reread the Maternal Dominance Hypothesis essay. Sometimes it leaves me at a loss, like the whole sway thing is hopeless in my case. On the other hand even though I am an intense planner and have dealt with anxiety and OCD, the other half of me IS actually known for being crazy fun, spontaneous, improvisational and open minded like “Sloane”. There are times where I can totally role with life and "chill and find the magic and wonder in the middle of the chaos”. As for whatever hormonal balance is running through me, I can't very well do much to change that. I can only have compassion and respect for what I am and what is biologically possible for my body. I do trust that a circumstance exists where I could conceive a daughter. Sure, it may never actually happen, but it is and always has been biologically possible for my body. I will remember that and take comfort in that knowledge, no matter what sex my second child is.

I’ve been officially swaying for seven months now and yeah, it is clearly time to loosen up. I’ve already been easing my strictness with the low blood sugar timing, but I’m still keeping the principals of that in mind. In terms of my diet, I’ll slowly take in a little more salt while still staying relatively low protein, high carb in comparison to how I used to eat pre-sway. I'll take it meal by meal for now. I don’t know about all the almond milk I’m drinking for the calcium thing... We’ll see what happens. Who cares, right? I figure that probably isn’t a huge make or break it thing. I also take reasonable amounts of cal-mag, iodine, and folic supplements so I can keep that up with no stress. I never got that into the coffee, alcohol or fiber recommendations. They’re all kind of hard on my system, but I dabble with the first two when I feel like it. I do drink more diet coke than I used to just because I like it.

The exercise thing is a pleasurable fit. Before the sway I already did moderate to high intensity cardio five or so times a week for thirty minutes or so. For the sway I’ve increased the duration to an hour or more for seven days a week while lowering the intensity to lighter cardio or walking. I’ve enjoyed this and could keep doing things this way on autopilot indefinitely.

As for being a vegetarian, that’s easy too. I've wondered if that really could sway though. I mean, aren't whole cultures vegetarian with the same sex ratio as meat eating countries? This seems like correlation versus causation. Maybe the people who choose to be vegetarian in the UK or US tend to be the more compassionate, empathetic animal loving women who statistically have a more "pink-friendly" hormonal profile?

One attempt seems like a total no-brainer. I keep saying I’d do every four days, but mostly we’re just doing pull-out until it's the morning of ovulation day as predicted by the OPKs. It’s kind of stressful, but I think we can take it for now.

I recently remembered way back to my first foray with gender desire, back when I was ten and my mom was pregnant with her fourth baby. I had a secret deep wish that the baby would be a boy because my brother and I got on great whereas my sister and I struggled intensely with jealously. I didn’t feel like I could handle another sister and I prayed everyday the baby was a boy. We didn’t find out the gender until he was born, but I fell so in love with my new brother and so grateful that he was a he. So, in a weird way it helps to remember that once the gender thing DID go exactly how I’d hoped, and once I’d hoped so deeply for blue over pink. It's even got me thinking about the horrible possibility that if I do have a daughter, what if I struggle with jealousy with her?! I’ve heard that does happen with some mother and daughter relationships and it sounds excruciating! Jealousy has eaten up some of my relationships with women, but I’ve never had those problems with men. Also, many women on my side of the family have struggled with eating disorder but all of the my male relatives appear to have solid and comfortable lives. If I end up with two healthy sons, well I would mourn for the daughter I never had, but I know that would be a blessing. I’ll be so excited to see my son as a big brother either way.

First paragraph: I want you to keep in the back of your mind that essay was meant not to say that people need to change their lives or who they are for swaying. It's to try and get you guys not to cling so tight to all these things that take a miraculous amount of human effort to accomplish. The color coded charts. The complicated BD patterns. All you need to do is avoid doing that kind of stuff. Let everything else take care of itself.

Second paragraph: Ok sounds great. :agree:

Third paragraph: Excellent. :)

Fourth: Women are vegetarians for tons of different reasons and since the animal studies do also seem to back this up (as do our results), I really think it is swaying. As for vegetarian countries having roughly 50-50, as Erin and I have already mentioned there is a huge difference in "vegetarian" diets just as there are in meat eating diets and diets that you've been following since birth, basically - that is what your body is already accustomed to. A woman eating vegetarian since birth is not the same scenario as someone following it for a few months or a year or 10 years or whatever. We (most of us anyway) are falling into this minority group that make mostly boys or girls while most people seem to pop out both relatively easily, and so we cannot simply look over any large population and extrapolate anything. Most people seem to be able to have a boy and a girl without even thinking about it!! Trust me, 4 boys over 20 years while practically everyone else I know had one of each, has proven that to me.

Fifth: I agree with your analysis on this. I think sometimes some of us have a vision in our head of a mother daughter relationship that is not based in realistic expectations and many mothers and daughters really don't get along that well, struggle with jealousy, or whatever. all children regardless of gender sometimes don't mesh with the expectations in our mind (I know this both as a daughter and a mother!!)

I just got off the phone with my 2nd son who lives on his own in a different city and I really miss him. I talk to him or my first son, nearly every day and they are just both such gifts to me every day. At the same time (I'm a really bad daughter these days) I have not talked to my own mom for over a month. :/ IT doesn't always pan out that the daughter is the one you connect with and the son isn't.

[1moregirl]

The primary reason I have people track nutrient intake is to be sure they get ENOUGH. I don't let people with eating disorders track at all for this very reason. So I'm not sure if this is a justification for you not tracking or reassurance to the previous poster or a dig at me but if it is the latter it is not warranted because I have worked very hard to stop the atmosphere of eating disorders that were endemic on the diets that are nothing but dry spaghetti and rice cakes.

Let me explain something about swaying, at least the way we do it here on this site. It is not a guarantee of gender if you do everything "right" enough. It is not "BD on this day and you'll have a girl" or "if your pH is this then you'll get a girl". It is that maternal condition and overall fertility plus cues from the environment send signal to your body about what gender baby has a better shot. So a person can do everything right off the blue sway plan and still get a girl if their body gets those signals from elsewhere or if their condition or fertility is more "pink" and vice versa. Swaying in and of itself isn't swaying, swaying is sending a message to your body and then your body does the swaying. Diet is one way we send that message but there are many many others.

A person who's a vegetarian absolutely totally and completely can get boys. I have had many successful vegetarian blue swayers who got boys eating a more HE type diet. OF COURSE being a vegetarian doesn't completely contribue to a sway. NOTHING completely contributes to a sway. That is why I am jumping up and down foaming at the mouth today telling you guys not to go over your calendars from 6 years ago looking for the "magic BD pattern" because it has nothing to do with why you got a boy or girl. It is a thousand things working together most of which we cannot even see. All we are trying to do here is follow the best data at our disposal to send that signal that it's "girly time".

I know it's more comforting to hear something like "if you take enough calcium and quit eating salt you automatically get a girl" because it's easy, it's ssimple, you can wrap your head around it, it's like hearing "take shark cartilage to prevent cancer" but it doesn't work. Our way is harder, harder to do and to understand, and less "sexy" sounding but at least it's the truth. Eat right, diet, exercise, don't smoke, you probably won't get cancer, shark cartilage or no, but it's not a guarantee that you won't because maybe you didn't always eat right, maybe you have genetics that make it more likely for you to have cancer, maybe you were exposed to secondhand smoke, maybe you drink too much at the same time or whatever. The human body is like a hurricane, a bunch of things working in concert and some of those things go back to when you were in your mother's womb probably even, plus sheer dumb luck.

Atomic - no I certainly wasn't having a dig at you Hun. I have the utmost respect for you and wouldn't stoop that low. :) I was just stating how some ladies could have a tendency to get a bit obsessed and carried away with ANY sort of diet, which wouldn't be great for their overall sway. That's all. I think we all have to stay somewhat relaxed about all areas of a sway and not get too obsessed. No digs at anyone. :)

[atomic sagebrush]

Atomic - no I certainly wasn't having a dig at you Hun. I have the utmost respect for you and wouldn't stoop that low. :) I was just stating how some ladies could have a tendency to get a bit obsessed and carried away with ANY sort of diet, which wouldn't be great for their overall sway. That's all. I think we all have to stay somewhat relaxed about all areas of a sway and not get too obsessed. No digs at anyone. :)

Gotcha. :) As long as people are 110% sure they are getting enough nutrition to get and stay pregnant it is a-ok not to track, it's just that I've seen too many gals start off eating fairly normally but then over time get more and more restrictive without even really realizing it. I just like you guys to be on the lookout for that.