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Complex Emotions
July 8th, 2016, 12:58 AM
Do any other moms with a boy or boys hate sports? I'm nervous that if we have a second son our family will become based around sports.

I cannot stand sports! I'm completely disconnected from that realm and I absolutely hate the loud machismo culture that permeates them. Athletic jerseys make me physically ill. My own parents know this about me, yet they still sent tons of their football team’s apparel for my son to wear even before he was born. This made my GD feelings so much worse.

That said , I realize that if we had a girl she could very well like sports herself too… sigh.

foxtrotmama
July 8th, 2016, 09:57 AM
I feel similarly. I have two boys, and my IL's are sports fanatics. My husband's two younger brothers both played multiple sports, complete with tons of travel and 6 AM practice and I am not going there. They keep asking when my boys will start playing hockey, and I'm desperately trying to avoid that one.

I also feel a lot of pressure to, imo, overschedule my boys. There's this pervasive attitude that "boys are busy" and need tons of activities to "burn them out". My boys ARE busy, but an afternoon at the park burns them out better than 45 minutes of waiting to hit a ball off a tee.

atomic sagebrush
July 8th, 2016, 02:31 PM
I do like sports ok, admittedly I would never sit and watch them voluntarily but once I start, they are somewhat enjoyable (provided I can be on my laptop at the same time, that is) But I am pathologically interested in everything so I can generally work up an interest for most things.

My two oldest sons don't do any sports at all. They like all kinds of artsy stuff. My oldest sings and plays guitar and was in musicals when he was school age, plus was in the band at church. He loves to read and is into sciency stuff (his cell ring tone is "Bill Nye the science guy) and works at a microbrewery. One time when he was a teenager he and I planted all these gladiolas. My second son is a film buff and writer and works as a sous chef and just started at a sushi bar. He rides a unicycle. They're both very into computers. not a lot of grunting and scratching coming from them LOL but they're not really cream puffs either, I know the stereotype is one or the other, but there is a lot of wiggle room between the two extremes.

The interesting thing is that my husband (who is into sports and cars and stuff) actually had a weird kind of GD for a more manly boy with DS 3. I think he kind of let it ruin to some extent his relationship with our older boys is that they're just not into the same stuff as him - so don't let that happen! :)

nuthinbutpink
July 8th, 2016, 04:15 PM
All my girls play sports. Gender makes no difference. I love it though but it's really not about me anymore. It's about what they like.

atomic sagebrush
July 8th, 2016, 04:33 PM
:agree: at some point you get so much pleasure from stuff they enjoy ya kind of forget you're not super into it. :) It's just fun to watch them excelling at stuff that they enjoy.

Complex Emotions
July 9th, 2016, 12:06 AM
pink_bean, thanks for the confirmation that - yes - sports could probably be an issue even if we have a girl.

I would love for my son to get into dance! At two, he's already got a great sense of rhythm.

Complex Emotions
July 9th, 2016, 12:18 AM
foxtrotmama - Yeah, I hear you on this.

I can't even stomach all the sports related gifts/outfits our extended family is pushing on us ever since our son was born. These revolting sports gifts are the GD thorn in my side! I'll never pretend to like sports myself, but I'd be active at my son's games if it turns out to be something he loves. (I'm definitely not going to do anything to point him in that direction though!)

Complex Emotions
July 9th, 2016, 12:23 AM
My two oldest sons don't do any sports at all. They like all kinds of artsy stuff. My oldest sings and plays guitar and was in musicals when he was school age, plus was in the band at church. He loves to read and is into sciency stuff (his cell ring tone is "Bill Nye the science guy) and works at a microbrewery. One time when he was a teenager he and I planted all these gladiolas. My second son is a film buff and writer and works as a sous chef and just started at a sushi bar. He rides a unicycle. They're both very into computers. not a lot of grunting and scratching coming from them LOL but they're not really cream puffs either, I know the stereotype is one or the other, but there is a lot of wiggle room between the two extremes.

Oh man, Atomic - Your oldest two sound amazing!! Dang, if I never have a girl but my sons turn out like that I'm pretty sure my GD will be completely gone. :happy:

Erin514
July 9th, 2016, 08:54 AM
Yes!!
My DH is obsessively into hockey (to be fair, we live in Montreal and this is a common affliction), to the point that he is glued to his smart phone and has the radio running non-stop when there's trade rumors, watches all the games, etc, etc. Of course the indoctrination began early and my 3.5 year old can name most of the players on the team, is allowed to watch the playoffs with dad, and has his own jersey. I've just learned to tolerate it, because I see they're having fun together.

On the plus side, my DS also does lots of stuff that's more fun for me, like he's really into music and lets me cut/style/dye (with food coloring) his hair, and I'm going to put him in dance classes this fall because he already has some killer moves, lol. I figure some stuff is going to be bonding with dad time and some stuff will be with me. I want to encourage whatever he's interested in.

Atomic, your sons really do sound like cool people! I hope my boys end up like that!

atomic sagebrush
July 9th, 2016, 01:38 PM
Oh man, Atomic - Your oldest two sound amazing!! Dang, if I never have a girl but my sons turn out like that I'm pretty sure my GD will be completely gone. :happy:

They are completely awesome, and just to mention for those who don't totally know my story, I TTC my 3rd with NO gender preference at all (they were 16 and 13 then) and I just wanted another baby because I still had a lot of love to give to another child. It was only because I "just had a feeling" that DS 3 was a girl and all the symptoms and that darn Chinese Gender Calendar convinced me that it was a girl, that I felt like someone had taken "her" away from me and that is where my GD stemmed. (I had a few vague wishes for a daughter along the way but it wasn't the heartcrushing GD feelings that it grew into subsequent to that time) It was never anything lacking with my sons because I feel like we are as close as parents and kids can be (without being weird or anything.)

I mention this because I know most of the people on this site have littlez and it's hard to envision a future relationship with a guy who is 2 and plays with Thomas the Tank Engine all day long. But you can still have a very close and amazing (and not weird) relationship with a male child as well as a female one even into their adulthood. :)

foxtrotmama
July 10th, 2016, 11:38 PM
We're in Alberta, so probably similar to you there. Neither my DH or I has the hockey bug (we don't even skate!), but the inlaws and a huge number of friends and families lives revolve around their kid's hockey schedules, NHL schedules, WHL schedules, and their kid's off season cross training. If my kids insist on hockey, I'll find a grassroots league or something.

To be fair, I think my ILs would be pushing hockey if we had girls too. I don't really mind soccer, so we'll stick with that as long as possible.