Mom of angel Liv* - reallly want another baby girl

[sigrid86]

Hello all,

I'm 29 yrs old and got pregnant of our first child in December 2015 (took the pregnancy test on our holiday in Florida :)). At 24 weeks of pregnancy, my OB saw that our baby girl had symmetrical IUGR and a short nasal bone and transferred us to the best specialist of the country 2 days later. He noticed 3 other soft markers but couldn't tell what this was. Ofcourse it wasn't good since having 2 soft markers is already a lot... I also had an amniocentesis, which was perfectly fine.
But to make a long story short: after 6 weeks of uncertainty (I felt horrible the whole period), our baby girl Liv died in my womb probably the 23th of June and I gave birth the 25th of June. I thought we were somewhat 'prepared' because of the 6 weeks we had before, but ofcourse we weren't. I never knew it was possible to love someone that much. And I miss her terribly :'(

But now we want to ttc again, but I really would like to have another girl. I always wanted a girl and I had my girl but she died :'(
I'm also very scared for another pregnancy because I don't have much confidence in my body anymore, but I really want a healthy baby to hold in my arms!

I hope I can find the tips and tricks to ttc for another girl.
What is the success rate for these tips and tricks? Any idea?

Thank you for your answers X

[GirlieCat]

Welcome Sigrid. I am so sorry for the loss of your little Liv. That is heartbreaking and devastating.

http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/25157-complete-pink-swaying-statistics-spreadsheet.html This link will bring you to the girl sway statistics so you can see the different things that people incorporate into their sway. The most important thing for a girl sway is following the LE diet (low everything). There are lots of posts on what the LE diet is and how to use it to sway.

There is a lot of information in the forums so don't get overwhelmed, just as questions when you have them. Everyone on the site is extremely supportive and helpful.

[GirlieCat]

I should mention that DTD only once during your fertility window, when you get your positive OPK is also very important. Not sure if you are tracking your cycle and LH surge.

[XXforhubby]

My heart breaks for what you went through! I cannot imagine...

I can tell you what is working for most people, and that sways girl with a 75-65% success rate.

* LE diet 12+ weeks or longer. 1500-1800 calories, 40-50g protein, 40-60g fat. Most of us use myfitnesspal app to track protein and fat amounts. No meat, vegetarian of you can, and vegetable sources for fat (think vegetable oils instead of butter).

* Exercise 6+ weeks or longer. Cardio only for 60min a day for 5-7 days a week. It has to be 60 straight minutes without stopping. Walking is fine- it doesn't have to be running.

* One attempt at positive opk. You can also BD (baby dance) every 4 days when AF (Aunt Flo) ends until you go past the latest you've ever ovulated OR until CD21 (this is in case ovulation is delayed).

* Coffee, alcohol (any thing you like), fiber before fatty meals (only if you have some weight to lose or at a higher BMI).

* Folic Acid or Folate- 1200mcg-1600mcg. This is to prevent neural tube defects. This doesn't sway one way or another but is necessary for a healthy baby.

* Clomid or Femara if you can get it.

You may read in here some people JD (jumping and dumping right after BDing), using lubricants/jellys, or pH. Most of us do not do these anymore as they prevent/delay conception. If you need a lube for comfort, use a sperm friendly lubricant like Preseed, Conceive Plus, or Astroglide TTC. Only put a small amount on DH and NOT use the whole applicator (this would sway blue).

Most of us do not take any supplements like Calcium, Magnesium, Vitamin D, or prenatal vitamins. These sway blue heavily. That being said, if you have a deficiency or your doctor recommends you take something, then that is fine.

That's about it! Do not hesitate to start a new thread and ask any question you have. We are all here to help! I'm hoping and praying that you conceive a healthy, baby (hopefully girl!) real soon! I'll be following!

[emoji4]





[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[GirlieCat]

Xxforhubby- awesome post!

[sigrid86]

Thank you GirlieCat! I'm indeed a little bit overwhelmed by all the information.
Luckily I don't eat a lot lately (due to the circumstances) and I'm not a fan of meat. Maybe that's why we already conceived a girl the first time?
Just regarding ovulation...I used OPK already for conceiving Liv, but then we DTD on the day that the stripes were the brightest (I use sensitest urine dipsticks). It's kinda hard to see when you're 3-5 days before ovulation....or do you have tips for that also?

Thanks!

[sigrid86]

Thank you so much XXforhubby! It's indeed something I even don't want to happen to my worst enemy :s

Fortunately the LE diet will not be a problem, but I'm a bit scared that I will even lose more weight (BMI is now around 19).

Also for you, any tips to find out when the 3-5 days before the ovulation date are? I have an irregular cycle unfortunately :s

I'm afraid I will need to use some kind of multivitamine because I know I don't take in the necessary by my regular food intake. But if that sways blue I'll maybe stop taking them. Vitamine C was ok for a girl I guess, no?

Are there some kind of examples of meals you can eat? Because I'm not really sure what I can or cannot eat now :)

And what about paying for making a plan? Can anyone share experiences?

Thank you so much for your support!

[XXforhubby]

If you're at a low BMI already, I would eat 1800-2000 calories. There is a thread called LE diet that girls talk about what they eat and can give you ideas. I'll see if I can post the link.






[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[XXforhubby]

LE Diet Thread

https://r.tapatalk.com/shareLink?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww%2Egenderdreaming%2E com%2Fforum%2Fshowthread%2Ephp%3Ft%3D54926&share_tid=54926&share_fid=35024&share_type=t

[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[XXforhubby]

I wouldn't try for a cut off. Just BD when you get your first positive opk OR BD every 4 days when AF ends.

Trying for a 3-5 day cut off really prevents conception. The reason it may have worked last time was that it ended up being only 1 attempt in your fertile window or ovulation was earlier than you thought.




[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[XXforhubby]

Vitamins are up to you. We get plenty from the diet. The LE diet is a healthy pre-pregnancy diet. You can eat anything- plenty of fruits you like and vegetables. The only thing that matter is the 40-50g protein and 40-60g fat. Going meatless just helps sticking with the limits.




[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[XXforhubby]

If you can afford a plan, I HIGHLY recommend it! Atomic is awesome and can totally help you (regardless if you buy a plan!).

I would suggest posting on the LE diet forum, and introduce yourself and ask for meal suggestions.

My go to are:

Veggie burgers, salads with meat alternatives, Pizza subs (marinara, mozzarella, on a hoagie bun toasted. Sometimes I add a meat alternative to this), refried bean tacos, cheese pizza, I'll make dinner for family and only eat the sides not the meat. Big potato, take out the insides add cheese and mushrooms and broccoli, add it back inside the skin and bake until cheese is melted.

Meat alternatives like Beyond Beef, and Quorn are great to get protein that is vegetarian.




[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

[Kittybear]

So very sorry for your loss, I cannot even imagine..... Best of luck with your pink sway! I hope your angel's rainbow sister finds you all soon xxx

[foxtrotmama]

I'm sorry for your loss.

Taking vitamin supplements, especially a multivitamin, seems to sway heavily blue. Generally pink swayers are advised to skip the multivitamin while TTC and just take folic acid, then to start the prenatal when you get a BFP.

[GirlieCat]

Thank you GirlieCat! I'm indeed a little bit overwhelmed by all the information.
Luckily I don't eat a lot lately (due to the circumstances) and I'm not a fan of meat. Maybe that's why we already conceived a girl the first time?
Just regarding ovulation...I used OPK already for conceiving Liv, but then we DTD on the day that the stripes were the brightest (I use sensitest urine dipsticks). It's kinda hard to see when you're 3-5 days before ovulation....or do you have tips for that also?

Thanks!

You really are not looking for 3-5 days before ovulation, you just want to pinpoint your positive OPK which tells you when you have your LH hormone serge (luteinizing hormone). Ovulation typically occurs from 24-36 hours after you get your serge (time can vary). It is recommended to test for your serge and DTD when you get your first positive for a serge. This ensure you are close enough to O that sperms will be ready and also that you only have one attempt in your fertility window (attempt means unprotected sex trying to get prego).

There are a lot of brands you can buy that test for the LH serge and most are pretty easy to use. The problem lies in that the serge can be very quick for some woman so the exact serge might be missed but if you test multiple cycles you will start to learn your body and the tests. I don't have regular cycles (thankfully they are getting better) and I have been able to get a positive 3 out of 4 cycles (and even the 4th I figured it out without a clear positive). I use the cheapy Wondfo tests so I can test as often as I want without worrying about cost and they work for me. Some people don't like them but it is all up to what works for your body.

For me (and many others), it seems best to test early to mid afternoon. Serges seem to show up best at that time of day and don't drink excessive amounts of water in the hours leading up to the test time because you can dilute the sample.

[GirlieCat]

Thank you so much XXforhubby! It's indeed something I even don't want to happen to my worst enemy :s

Fortunately the LE diet will not be a problem, but I'm a bit scared that I will even lose more weight (BMI is now around 19).

Thank you so much for your support!

I lost 5 pounds in the first month on the diet (which I was happy about) but I am at BMI 21 now so I really don't need to lose anymore so I made sure to increase my calories a little bit and I haven't lost any more weight since. I use empty calories like a soda. You can certainly follow the diet and not lose weight. You definitely don't want to go lower than you are now.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you GirlieCat! I'm indeed a little bit overwhelmed by all the information.
Luckily I don't eat a lot lately (due to the circumstances) and I'm not a fan of meat. Maybe that's why we already conceived a girl the first time?
Just regarding ovulation...I used OPK already for conceiving Liv, but then we DTD on the day that the stripes were the brightest (I use sensitest urine dipsticks). It's kinda hard to see when you're 3-5 days before ovulation....or do you have tips for that also?

Thanks!

This is actually what we recommend on this site for TTC a girl. :agree: The 3-5 days before O idea has not worked for virtually all of us on here (most of us have 2-3-4 boys already and have tried that kind of thing!!) and has been debunked in studies. So I would fully have you just do what you did the last time.

I did want to give my most heartfelt condolences for your loss. :sadflwr:

[atomic sagebrush]

My heart breaks for what you went through! I cannot imagine...

I can tell you what is working for most people, and that sways girl with a 75-65% success rate.

* LE diet 12+ weeks or longer. 1500-1800 calories, 40-50g protein, 40-60g fat. Most of us use myfitnesspal app to track protein and fat amounts. No meat, vegetarian of you can, and vegetable sources for fat (think vegetable oils instead of butter).

* Exercise 6+ weeks or longer. Cardio only for 60min a day for 5-7 days a week. It has to be 60 straight minutes without stopping. Walking is fine- it doesn't have to be running.

* One attempt at positive opk. You can also BD (baby dance) every 4 days when AF (Aunt Flo) ends until you go past the latest you've ever ovulated OR until CD21 (this is in case ovulation is delayed).

* Coffee, alcohol (any thing you like), fiber before fatty meals (only if you have some weight to lose or at a higher BMI).

* Folic Acid or Folate- 1200mcg-1600mcg. This is to prevent neural tube defects. This doesn't sway one way or another but is necessary for a healthy baby.

* Clomid or Femara if you can get it.

You may read in here some people JD (jumping and dumping right after BDing), using lubricants/jellys, or pH. Most of us do not do these anymore as they prevent/delay conception. If you need a lube for comfort, use a sperm friendly lubricant like Preseed, Conceive Plus, or Astroglide TTC. Only put a small amount on DH and NOT use the whole applicator (this would sway blue).

Most of us do not take any supplements like Calcium, Magnesium, Vitamin D, or prenatal vitamins. These sway blue heavily. That being said, if you have a deficiency or your doctor recommends you take something, then that is fine.

That's about it! Do not hesitate to start a new thread and ask any question you have. We are all here to help! I'm hoping and praying that you conceive a healthy, baby (hopefully girl!) real soon! I'll be following!

[emoji4]





[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart (http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920)

This is so awesome I have nothing to even add. :) What she said. :bowdown:

[atomic sagebrush]

Sigrid, regarding the multivitamin, we have a compromise in that you can, instead, take a multivitamin for 2 or 3 days a week. This is going to give your body a chance at any nutrients you are needing but probably won't sway as strongly blue as taking it daily would.

My advice since you're having trouble becoming motivated to eat right now (understandably) and are already underweight, is to just go vegetarian. We have good results with vegetarian diets for pink and I think it may mess with your head too much if you're worrying about the foods you're eating.

[sigrid86]

Wow, thank you all so much for your support and tips!

I'll take the multivitamine for 2 or 3 days a week then.
I'm just having some problems with knowing what I can eat. And I love to exercise, but usually I exercised 3-4 times a week (playing tennis - competition level). So that's maybe not good since that sways more blue?

Atomic, can I ask you to make a personal plan? Where can I buy it? Sorry for all the questions but there is so much information over here that I don't know where to begin :)

[atomic sagebrush]

I would try to increase your exercise to more like 5-6 days a week, and possibly find something that is not so competitive if at all possible.

Can you just go vegetarian?? Eat what you feel like eating, but do not eat meat?? That has been a good compromise and very effective for having a girl. There are no magic foods that make girls or boys, but going vegetarian does seem to be very pink friendly and has not caused people's eating disorders to flare up.

The information for the personal plans is here: http://genderdreaming.com/forum/payments.php

[sigrid86]

But I will lose too much weight if I exercise 5-6 times a week, no? And I wouldn't know which exercise...I can't run because I get knee problems.

I can definitely go vegetarian, but is fish allowed or not?

There are a lot of plans...which one do you suggest? Thank you for the support already!

[atomic sagebrush]

Not if you eat more to compensate for the calories burned.

If you can't walk or run that much then you're not going to be able to exercise. That is fine. I did not exercise and still got a girl, it's just that it is a good sway tactic.

Fish or shellfish would have to be at no more than 2x a week. This is because it's not healthy for pregnancy to eat fish more often than that. So if you wanted to eat fish or shellfish twice per week that would be ok.

The customized or personalized plan (they are the same thing, I just can't remember how it's written down) is what you want. That is everything but diet and then we work together in your forum to iron out your diet needs. You can add on the books if you want to but you don't ahve to.