Need some advice

[oxox2013]

Hey ladies. So I'll try and make this short but I'm hoping for some advice or input. I'm feeling pretty down about my sway. We have been trying to get pregnant since august with no luck. I'm ready to throw in the towel and I am losing it on diet. Exercise has gone out the window. Supps have gone out the window (other than folic acid). My diet is pretty much null and void at this point. I'm on for a minute then off again. I am skipping meals but not enough to help me (such as I am skipping lunch just because I sleep through it (night shift probs) so really only eating two meals a day but I can't imagine that is helping because I am eating whatever sounds good and not tracking anything. I have been to my OB and she is making me try for 3 more months before referring me to a specialist but I don't think my hubby will go that route. He is of the mind frame that whatever happens happens and if we don't get pregnant naturally then it isn't meant to be. I just turned 35 so time is not on my side. I wish my OB would just prescribe me clomid but she won't. I'm feeling desperate. Like ordering clomid from some whackadoodle pharmacy desperate or having multiple attempts in the fertile window desperate.


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[oxox2013]

Also for what it is worth, we have been doing every 4 days with attempts


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[oxox2013]

Well this is disappointing. Guess no one has any advice or opinions for me? Feel free to delete this post moderators. No point in talking to myself!


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[maximbella]

Hi ox, I don't have a lot of advice as I'm also new, and I'm sure atomic is about to respond with anything better than I could ever provide you with... But I wanted to just let you know that I'm in the same shoes as you. I'm 35 (and a half!), ttc with nothing happening, and yesterday I went to my ob/gyn and she told me I have to try again for a few months without any intervention before she wold refer me to a RE to start conversations. My husband also will not go for that long and he's very much taken the mentality of "if it's meant to be it will happen". I know how hard it is, trust me...

[ThinkingofPink]

I think at this point if you're desperate to have a baby and won't be devastated by an opposite I'd start having sex every three days. Atomic has a lot of questions thrown at her every day so it may take her a couple days but she will chime in!

[atomic sagebrush]

oxox can you just go vegetarian? Drop all the other diet stuff and then just stick with that if you can??

Overall you seem very pink friendly to me and I'd still have you keep going for it. Personally I'd get a second opinion since you're 35 and have been trying for over 6 months. there's no reason why you should go another 3 months.

I want you to either do e3d or every 4 plus one at positive OPK whichever is easier.

Are you having much EWCM???

[atomic sagebrush]

Well this is disappointing. Guess no one has any advice or opinions for me? Feel free to delete this post moderators. No point in talking to myself!


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I do my best to answer the posts in a timely manner. Going from 10 pm on the 8th to 4pm on the 10th is the best I can do, I'm sorry.

[oxox2013]

I'm sorry atomic, I honestly meant nothing by that comment! It was not directed at you or any other person really. I was just frustrated and this all I have been able to think about and I was really just hoping for some help or encouragement! Again I apologize. I know you do a wonderful job of responding to everyone on these forums. Everyone here has been great. I just didn't post a topic that generated a lot of responses. No big deal!

I have had EWCM and a pretty good amount I think. I have been super conscious of my body since TTC this time around. With my boys I never paid attention to that stuff because I never really had to try to get pregnant before so I don't have a good baseline on what it was like then.

Maxim sounds like we are in very similar situations! Man it does suck. I just need to regroup and try to be positive I think. Getting down in the dumps is not going to help me get pregnant faster I guess! It is good to know I'm not alone tho so thank you :)


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[skillet04]

35 is not old :) i have 2 boys as well...first born when i was 22 and the next did not come along until i was 35.... i had finally stopped praying and trying various natural fertility boosting ideas when i turned 30.5 ....so 4.5 yrs later it just happened...both times i conceived i was working fulltime and taking a full load of college courses (and home educating ds1 when ds2 was conceived) getting pg was not even on my radar.... if you have been ovulating all this time you may check into other things that can interfere...like for me my uterus was tipped backwards before having ds2 which also made it hard to conceive ....i fell and whacked my hip out of place and during that out of place, maybe because i was sleeping differently to alleviate the pain(?) It allowed the sperm to meet the egg....i do not know for sure if it went back to being tipped backwarda because the midwife did not do internal exams postpartum (and i have no faith in the medical community i feel like they dont really care about people and so have been having a hard time finding someone to make an appointment with). Yeah so if you are ovulating, really what else is clomid going to do for ya....it might even interferre with your bodies natural ability to do so (after you stop taking it) since it will alter the pituitary, hypothalamus axis and other big words ;)

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[atomic sagebrush]

Ok that's good about the EWCM (if you hadn't I'd have had you add in guanefesin or preseed). What I would do is just have sex either every 3 days or else e4d but then add in another attempt at pos OPK. whichever you think will work better for you.

ARe you guys doing shallow release or immediate J and D? If so, I'd stop, and also you may want to spend at least some part of time laying on tummy just in case it is partly tipped uterus (altho I have one of the worst tipped uteruses ever and never had any trouble conceiving.) :)

[skillet04]

Oh Atomic reading that a tipped uterus never interferred with your being able to have 5 children makes me so giddy !!!

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[atomic sagebrush]

Mine is severely tipped, too. With my 3rd, 4th, and 5th pregnancies it was so bad that it actually put pressure on my bladder during early pregnancy and kept me from peeing sometimes (not fun!) My mom and sister's are also tipped. Most doctors no longer believe this prevents pregnancy and instead is a variation that occurs naturally like having brown or blue eyes. :)

I would try laying in different positions like on tummy though just in case it helps a little.

You may also want to add in Guanefesin at some point - it may sway blue, but will help make thinner CM that may make it easier for the swimmers to make their way to the egg.

[Throwaway_panther]

My mom has a tipped uterus and got 3 girls no problem, fyi!

I'm so sorry you're so frustrated <3 I understand feeling like you're alone in this, especially when even your DH isn't as supportive. I echo atomic -- at 35 with no luck in 6 months, I'd say get a second opinion for Clomid. You DO still have time, so don't feel TOO stressed (that could be an issue with conceiving, too), but you're also not wrong to be wanting maybe some help after 6 months at that age.

What's your BMI like right now? I don't recall seeing anyone ask, but is there a chance your body fat might be too low to sustain a pregnancy right now?

[oxox2013]

My BMI is in the normal range so it is fine to sustain a pregnancy but I have actually dropped some weight early on in my sway and managed to maintain from there. I was considered overweight before I started LE. I believe my bmi is 23 so I still could stand to lose some weight I'm sure. I'm just going to try and regroup and refocus. If this doesn't work for us it is what it is i suppose. I've already been down the high tech route and that was also unsuccessful so this may just be natures way of telling me to move on from this decade old obsession of having a daughter :(


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[Throwaway_panther]

23 is definitely a healthy BMI, though I know pink swayers tend to try to go lower (I was in the 19s when I conceived my DD, and still actively trying to lose because of my eating disorder).

I know this can sometimes be not the best thing to hear for people struggling, but I have seen many women -- including on this board -- who dealt with this same struggle only to end up surprised with their healthy baby girl! I'm sending good thoughts your way <3

[atomic sagebrush]

Anyone having trouble sticking with the diet needs to just mainly go vegetarian and exercise if they can. Anyone in this boat, please don't worry about your BMI (only if it's getting too low, I mean!)

When the diet goes on and on people end up setting themselves up for a binge/purge thing where they try to cut back and end up cheating and giving up in the end.

OX what I want you to do right now is find a diet you can stick to without being so miserable and then it's going to seem like a lot less of a chore.