When to DTD so confused

[Jta]

My cycles are not regular. I haven't been tracking but want to fall pregnant this cycle.
I'm 27 my partner is 29.
I'm taking vitex.
It it best for partner to abstain until i get a solid smiley or frequent release everyday and DTD when i get a positive?
Any help would be great, thanks :)

[Jta]

Or with frequent release do i dtd everyday in fertile window?
My first child wasn't planned so i have no idea what we did, just unprotected sex on holiday multiple times haha

[foxtrotmama]

I don't think that either abstain or frequent release has been getting great results. I know a lot of pink swayers have been just letting their DH "Do what he does", and then TTC on whichever pattern works for their situation. If you're having sex more often than you plan to attempt, I would use protection.

One attempt at positive OPK seems to sway pink quite a lot, but if your cycle isn't regular it can be difficult to catch the egg that way. BDing every 4 days should usually land you with one attempt in your fertile period. E4D plus one attempt when you get a +OPK can increase the odds of conceiving in that cycle, but you might end up with a second attempt.

Are you doing any other sway tactics? Supplements? Things like 12 weeks on the LE diet sway pink more than one attempt, and taking tons of vitamin supplements (outside of folic acid, which is needed no matter your DG) can increase the odds of blue even with just one attempt.

[Jta]

I don't think that either abstain or frequent release has been getting great results. I know a lot of pink swayers have been just letting their DH "Do what he does", and then TTC on whichever pattern works for their situation. If you're having sex more often than you plan to attempt, I would use protection.

One attempt at positive OPK seems to sway pink quite a lot, but if your cycle isn't regular it can be difficult to catch the egg that way. BDing every 4 days should usually land you with one attempt in your fertile period. E4D plus one attempt when you get a +OPK can increase the odds of conceiving in that cycle, but you might end up with a second attempt.

Are you doing any other sway tactics? Supplements? Things like 12 weeks on the LE diet sway pink more than one attempt, and taking tons of vitamin supplements (outside of folic acid, which is needed no matter your DG) can increase the odds of blue even with just one attempt.



Thanks so much taking the time to reply.
I'll definitely try every 4 days. I'll buy a digital ovulation kit this month just so i can see when i ovulate.

Haven't been on diet but I'm only 50kg anyway. I will try and skip breakfast from now on but i am on cd5 already.
I'm taking cranberry. What else will help sway girl?
I hust finished by 5 week boot camp with a week break but will resume exercise tomorrow.

Thank you 😊

[atomic sagebrush]

If you want to get pregnant this cycle (hopefully, please understand that even under ideal circumstances only about 20% of people conceive in any given month) then I would have you have sex every 4 days starting after AF ends and continuing through until you're SURE you have ovulated (even if that means going all the way till your next AF begins)!

I would also have you have ONE additional attempt whenever you get a positive OPK. Just one. keep going with the e4d before and after this one attempt.

[atomic sagebrush]

Or with frequent release do i dtd everyday in fertile window?
My first child wasn't planned so i have no idea what we did, just unprotected sex on holiday multiple times haha

Neither abstain nor FR has gotten stellar results and both really cut odds of conception, so I tend to leave those out for anyone in a rush to conceive.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks so much taking the time to reply.
I'll definitely try every 4 days. I'll buy a digital ovulation kit this month just so i can see when i ovulate.

Haven't been on diet but I'm only 50kg anyway. I will try and skip breakfast from now on but i am on cd5 already.
I'm taking cranberry. What else will help sway girl?
I hust finished by 5 week boot camp with a week break but will resume exercise tomorrow.

Thank you ��

Even if you could just go vegetarian between now and then it may really help.

[Jta]

If you want to get pregnant this cycle (hopefully, please understand that even under ideal circumstances only about 20% of people conceive in any given month) then I would have you have sex every 4 days starting after AF ends and continuing through until you're SURE you have ovulated (even if that means going all the way till your next AF begins)

I would also have you have ONE additional attempt whenever you get a positive OPK. Just one. keep going with the e4d before and after this one attempt.


Thanks for the reply!
This is a very useful forum.
I feel like I'm talking to a celebrity. You come up so much when i google gender swaying tips haha

[atomic sagebrush]

Haha no not at all, just a mom like you who really likes helping other people hopefully achieve their dreams. :)

[Girl]

Hi everyone!

I'm new here and ttc a girl!
In my DH family, there are nothing but boys!
My first is a son, almost two! And we're planning to only have one more, so we would LOVE to have a baby girl!

My DH is taking cranberry sups.
I am taking baby aspirine sinds my AF stopped. And folavit sinds 2months everyday.
We DTD yesterday on cd5 and my O is expected around cd15.
Is it best to abstain and have one attempt 1 or 2 days prior to O-day?
Maybe with positive OPK?

I also have clearblue active balance gel, with a ph of 3,8.
When do i best start using and stop using this?

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi and welcome Girl!

The good news is gender doesn't run in the family that way.

I would have you reduce aspirin to 3-5 days a week maximum because we've seen a lot of side effects with it. Take only till BFP and then gradually wean off.

If your hubby is under 35 then you can have him abstain and have one attempt at positive OPK and if over 35, have him release daily and then have one attempt at positive OPK.

I would use the active balance gel 12-24 hours before your planned attempt.

[Girl]

Hi and welcome Girl!

The good news is gender doesn't run in the family that way.

I would have you reduce aspirin to 3-5 days a week maximum because we've seen a lot of side effects with it. Take only till BFP and then gradually wean off.

If your hubby is under 35 then you can have him abstain and have one attempt at positive OPK and if over 35, have him release daily and then have one attempt at positive OPK.

I would use the active balance gel 12-24 hours before your planned attempt.

Thanks atomic for the fast reply!!

My DH is 29 so i think we are going for the abstain for the best attempt then...
About the OPK, should i get the more expensive ones like clearblue, that just show a smiley?
Because i have those cheap ones now en they give a very blurry line a few days before... it's confusing :rolleyes:

For the balance gel, only once? Not in the days before the attempt?

[atomic sagebrush]

Whichever OPK work best for you. The Clearblues are a little expensive. Some people order cheaper Wondfo brand online.

You can use it before if you like to. I'm not finding it is adding anything to our results and it is expensive so more and more I'm having people use it only before attempt.

[Girl]

Whichever OPK work best for you. The Clearblues are a little expensive. Some people order cheaper Wondfo brand online.

You can use it before if you like to. I'm not finding it is adding anything to our results and it is expensive so more and more I'm having people use it only before attempt.

And what would you prefer: the active gel or a lime douche? I'm in doubt...

[atomic sagebrush]

I'm not a fan of lime douche and would very much prefer no one ever used them

[Jta]

If you want to get pregnant this cycle (hopefully, please understand that even under ideal circumstances only about 20% of people conceive in any given month) then I would have you have sex every 4 days starting after AF ends and continuing through until you're SURE you have ovulated (even if that means going all the way till your next AF begins)!

I would also have you have ONE additional attempt whenever you get a positive OPK. Just one. keep going with the e4d before and after this one attempt.

So dtd monday night. So friday night would be the next, im doing e4d. I got a flashy smiley on my clear blue today (thursday morning, cycle day 13 ) yesterday i got the circle which meanslow fertility i think.
Probably i dumb question but because I'll be having sex in my fertile window should i drop the extra attempt at a solid smiley? I'm guessing i will get a solid smiley on Saturday.
Also should i stop vitex when i get a solid?

Thank you, sorry forsilly questions haha

[atomic sagebrush]

If you want to get pregnant this cycle, best chance of that will be to have the additional attempt.

You don't have to, but it will raise odds of conception.

[atomic sagebrush]

You should probably stop vitex now in case it's delaying ovulation.

[onelastsway]

Hi and welcome Girl!

The good news is gender doesn't run in the family that way.

I would have you reduce aspirin to 3-5 days a week maximum because we've seen a lot of side effects with it. Take only till BFP and then gradually wean off.

If your hubby is under 35 then you can have him abstain and have one attempt at positive OPK and if over 35, have him release daily and then have one attempt at positive OPK.

I would use the active balance gel 12-24 hours before your planned attempt.

What is the active balance gel? Is it a sway technique?

[atomic sagebrush]

The jellies have not worked for us and seem to be neutral - not swaying pink or blue. Some people want to use them and I allow this at the beginning, but it's something we drop over time to boost odds of conception.

[Jta]

If you want to get pregnant this cycle, best chance of that will be to have the additional attempt.

You don't have to, but it will raise odds of conception.


Ok so didn't have time to dtd on friday night but did this morning (Saturday) and i got a solid smiley this morning too. I'll continue to bed e4d but fingers crossed one attempt is enough. If not I'll do an extra next month.
Thank you <3

[atomic sagebrush]

Great!! Good luck and pink dust!!

[Inhope]

I'm so confused, I don't know how many threads that I have been reading to try to understand so I have to ask. Which method has the best result: one attempt or every 4 day method or are they equal?

My plan was to begin with one attempt, My cycles used to be very regular and I knew by cm, cervix opening and o-pain when I ovulated.. I have been on the LE diet for four weeks and my ovulation is about one week late and I have only little ewcm (use to have a lot), I think that I will ovulate very soon though (re the cervix opening and the ewcm). Do anyone else had experienced delayed ovulation and/or less ewcm?

If my cycles have start to be irregular and more difficult to predict (because of the reduced ewcm) Im wondering if e4 day has the same result as one attempt? If it has the same result maybe that is a better option? Or should I start with OPK? How reliable are them? My concern is that they causes a lot of stress?

[atomic sagebrush]

We can't compare them like that, because higher fertility (quicker time to conception) probably sways blue, and lower fertility (longer time to conception) probably sways pink. Additionally longer time to conception means longer time on diet and supps for those using those.

People start off their sways with with one attempt. So the people who get pregnant with one attempt are generally speaking, on diet shorter times and are probably more fertile than those who had to go to e4d (because people do switch to this after a few months of BFN). This skews the results to make one attempt look less successful than it actually is. If we were to test the two methods in a study using a randomly selected group of people, only THEN would we be able to really compare them. We just cannot do that now.

Being on the LE Diet can make delayed O and less EWCM. That is probably at least partly how it sways.

OPK can be unreliable and stressful. Definitely. If your cycle goes irregular (remember, this may be pink friendly if it happens on LE Diet) then yes, going to e4d is an option that may help. But do it because it is easier, not because of hte results, since we honestly do not know which one is better. Both are getting good results, that's all we can hope for! :)

[Inhope]

We can't compare them like that, because higher fertility (quicker time to conception) probably sways blue, and lower fertility (longer time to conception) probably sways pink. Additionally longer time to conception means longer time on diet and supps for those using those.

People start off their sways with with one attempt. So the people who get pregnant with one attempt are generally speaking, on diet shorter times and are probably more fertile than those who had to go to e4d (because people do switch to this after a few months of BFN). This skews the results to make one attempt look less successful than it actually is. If we were to test the two methods in a study using a randomly selected group of people, only THEN would we be able to really compare them. We just cannot do that now.

Being on the LE Diet can make delayed O and less EWCM. That is probably at least partly how it sways.

OPK can be unreliable and stressful. Definitely. If your cycle goes irregular (remember, this may be pink friendly if it happens on LE Diet) then yes, going to e4d is an option that may help. But do it because it is easier, not because of hte results, since we honestly do not know which one is better. Both are getting good results, that's all we can hope for! :)

Thanks atomic :) I finally understand! It's also a relief to read that the diet can cause a delayed ovulation and less ewcm, and its especially a relief that this actually sways pink!!! I was afraid that my body had start to mess with me. I still haven't got my ovulation so it's at least a week late witch also means that I'm going to be on the diet for more than 12 weeks before my first attempt in may. So this delay could actually be a good sign for my pink sway? In that case :)

After reading this I think that I will stick to my original plan and start with one attempt. Maybe I should give opk a try or just trust the fertility signs like I have been doing before, what do you think? My youngest is a one attempt at first try to conceive, but now I'm older and on the LE diet so I just have to wait and se...

Does the cycles tends to be longer when you are on the LE diet? If the ovulation is delayed the first cycle on the diet does it tend to be even more delayed the second cycle? I understand that it could be very individual but wondering if others had experienced the same thing?

[atomic sagebrush]

Fertility signs are not reliable. I would use the OPK to give you a better idea about when your surge occurs.

REsults are all over the map with delayed O. Different for everyone.

I would try having one serving of full fat dairy a day. This will help your body get enough fat to ovulate on time.

[Inhope]

Fertility signs are not reliable. I would use the OPK to give you a better idea about when your surge occurs.

REsults are all over the map with delayed O. Different for everyone.

I would try having one serving of full fat dairy a day. This will help your body get enough fat to ovulate on time.

Ok, then I'm going to give the OPK a try. Is it enough to test once a day in the afternoon or evening?

Is it best to do the attempt ASAP after a positive OPK, how many hours after a + OPK do we have before it's to late?

If we are going for "the one attempt method" should we do a new attempt after e4 days or is that e4 day's method?

Re one serving full fat diary, could you give any examples, except milk?

I eat cheese and butter on my sandwiches twice a day, and have some cream- or cream fraiche based sauce to my veggies at lunch. is it ok to eat more full fat cheese, even if that means that I will increase my protein and fat intake (over the upper limits)?

[atomic sagebrush]

Please follow the instructions that come with OPK as different ones are formulated differently.

I think testing once a day is usually enough, some like to test 2x a day. Up to you.

You'll O average 24-36 hours after first positive. Sometimes this stretches to more like 2-3 days.

After you have the positive OPK attempt, some people do like to start doing e4d after that. That way, if ovulation is delayed you are still covered. But others choose not to do that the first month or two anyway, because they don't want to take the chance getting pregnant with e4d without giving one attempt a good try.

If you're eating a serving a day of butter/cheese then you don't need to add in the dairy.

[Jta]

Great!! Good luck and pink dust!!

2nd month trying and dropped vitex. Except I'm on cycle day 17 with only a faint line. Did i miss ovulation or can it be this late.
I tried to attach a picture. Not sure if it worked haha

[Bane Harper]

Keep it simple, try out twice a week until you are sure of ovulation

Good luck

[atomic sagebrush]

Jta - it can def. be that late and sometimes vitex will wreak havoc even a month or two after dropping it.

Faint lines like that are negatives. I'd go ahead and have an attempt now just to cover, in case it's a false negative, and keep testing. If you get a positive tomorrow or the next day, stick with this attempt, if it's later than that, have another one.

[Jta]

Jta - it can def. be that late and sometimes vitex will wreak havoc even a month or two after dropping it.

Faint lines like that are negatives. I'd go ahead and have an attempt now just to cover, in case it's a false negative, and keep testing. If you get a positive tomorrow or the next day, stick with this attempt, if it's later than that, have another one.

Thanks so much you reply so fast.
I got a dark line today cycle day 19. So we'll do our one attempt today.

Crazy how much cycles can vary.
Thank you

[atomic sagebrush]

Great! Good luck