Need calming down

[lovellcute]

I've had 3 scans, 16, 20,21 weeks all said they think baby is a girl! (Two were very sure one was the nhs scan and he said they don't like to tell us but he thought girl but that 'testicles can drop')
Got Potty shots etc
Posted here and comments all agreed

But I've just gone into mumsnet forum reading the pregnancy board and a woman on there was told girl 3 separate times and she just had a boy..

So yeah.. I'm freaking out
Sweat inducing anxiety over here [emoji24]


Did anyone else feel like this? Should I book another scan?
I said I wouldn't tell anyone the sex of this baby but we were so excited we have told friends and family, which would make it even worse if it's wrong! As everyone is so excited for us!

I know no one can reassure me because these scans can be wrong can't they?
But please tell me it's rare?
I honestly don't think I would ever come to terms with the scan being wrong, I wish I had never found out TBH!

This pregnancy has been physically horrific so I can't have another baby so if it's wrong how will I ever come to terms with this?

Wahhh


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[Parying4agirl]

Hi sorry I havent got any advice about the scan situation but I would say try relaxing, just because it happened to the other lady doesnt mean it will to you.
Whats more important to you, another scan now to know yes its a girl or how would u cope for remaining months knowing its a boy? Would that give you time to accept and prepare?
If you were to wait until birth and find out its a boy but healthy maybe there will be nothing to comes to terms with initially cos uve been blessed with a bundle of jOy
Fingers xd its a girl for u

[Parying4agirl]

How recent was this ladies scan? Technology has come very far these days.
Also some babies are born around 24/25 weeks and i would say they are very much defined by then. The fact that the sonographer didnt really wanna tell u, he was covering himself incase ‘testicles drop’
Personally I think if you have had two positive girl scans, go with that

[lovellcute]

I'd much rather know before to come to terms with it! 100%
The thought of going to the hospital with pink babygrows I've been collecting and expecting my baby girl to have the shock would be too much!
Also having to tell people afterwards! I'd rather do it now!
My sister just said that even if I pay another £100 for a scan and they say it's a girl
Will I actually believe it? Probably not
I saw with my own eyes 3 times what they explained to me as 'girls parts' so in my rational mind I can say yes it's a girl
But I just can't stop worrying about the what ifs!

Just holding onto the fact it's very rare and the place I went to have only ever got it wrong twice and they do at least 10 scans a day! X


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[lovellcute]

It was very recent! Literally born in the last few days which is what's scaring me
I did obsessively google 'scans gone wrong' and they all seemed to be from years ago and when the tech was 90% sure etc
So this story had completely thrown me!


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[lovellcute]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20180307/848197e8f3ef685b6c7d659f51ae8935.jpg

Posting my potty shot! Don't expect people to reassure me just need to post it!
I can see 'girl' bits but then again I'm
No expert
And maybe he was right and the testies can drop? What if it's just a bulge which would turn into boy bits!

As you can tell I am having abit of an anxiety moment [emoji85]


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[atomic sagebrush]

Stop doing this to yourself. No matter what you cannot change anything by tearing yourself up and stress like this is not good for your pregnancy.

I am going to give you a list of reasons why people get wrong ultrasound guesses. DO NOT APPLY THIS TO YOURSELF, I am explaining why you can RARELY find someone who gets a wrong ultrasound guess. I have looked at your ultrasound and it is a girl. It's crystal clear and in the right age range and the chances that it is wrong are vanishingly small. The following explanation is to explain to you why OTHER PEOPLE get wrong ultrasound guesses and if you turn it around to then wail "but this means my ultrasound is wrong" I will unleash the full force of atomic tough love on you, girl. :)

Just keep in mind the following:

1) People lie on the internet and "three scans" turns into "well I actually only had ONE scan to find out the gender, the other two were just what my husband thought he saw"
2) Some docs offices and/or countries still use outdated technology and/or posts are quite old
3)Techs have bad days or simply don't care about the gender and just make quick guesses without putting a smidge of effort into it OR like the previous poster mentioned, they give very non-committal answers to cover their butts just in case they happen to be wrong.
4)Techs mislead people deliberately if they think gender abortion is on the table
5)A very small % of babies actually have something wrong with their genitals that can make boys look like girls or girls look like boys
6)MOST IMPORTANT AND THE CAUSE OF MOST WRONG SCANS - 95% of all the wrong scans I've seen were either too early (before 13 weeks) or too late (after 24 weeks). Baby is either not developed or too squooshed. It is entirely possible for people to have a 10 week, 12 week, and 30 week scan and be told wrong gender every time because they never had a single scan in the window of time in which gender is reliably able to be determined via ultrasound. YOU DID.
7) And of those remaining 5% the scans were virtually all done by male techs, people doing scans unprofessionally ("my friend is a receptionist in an ultrasound place and has access to a scan machine!! or "my mother was a tech but retired 20 years ago and her old employer let her do my scan" or OB's. For whatever reason, I have seen time after time male techs and OB's giving wrong ultrasound guesses (and please note, your male tech was the one who was the least helpful, see this time and again, it really is a thing)
8)Legitimately wrong guesses due to cord between legs, blurry shots, leg bone in way, etc.

You have 3 different scans, all in the right age range. Scans are clear. Barring some insane and highly unlikely turn of events your baby is a girl. Save that 100 pounds/dollars for baby clothes (because trust me you're gonna need it LOLOLOL)

[atomic sagebrush]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20180307/848197e8f3ef685b6c7d659f51ae8935.jpg

Posting my potty shot! Don't expect people to reassure me just need to post it!
I can see 'girl' bits but then again I'm
No expert
And maybe he was right and the testies can drop? What if it's just a bulge which would turn into boy bits!

As you can tell I am having abit of an anxiety moment [emoji85]


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There. Is. NO. Penis.

Testicles drop just before birth. Gender is determinable by ultrasound LONG before testicles drop (5 months before!!) because there is a scrotum and penis. Testicles dropping have NOTHING to do with gender determination via ultrasound (it is actually harder to determine gender at the stage of gestation the testicles drop, because everything is so squished together in the womb it's hard to see genitals)

This guy was just being deliberatey non-committal because that's the way he prefers to do things.

[Parying4agirl]

True i think being in hospital with pink and having blue will be too difficult
Sadly because you’ve read the story no matter what happens on another scan you will doubt the result either way.
Id suggest have a scan and just go with it. Uve already been given the doubt so the scan will only say one or the other anyways. Best of luckx

[The Anchor]

That is a girl!!! Stop worrying!

[lovellcute]

Thanks for all your comments!
I feel slightly calmer today! And thankyou atomic for your comment, I wish I knew more details about this recent story I've read but I never will so have to stop torturing myself! I'm guessing they were nhs scans where the person doesn't care enough about the gender to be certain etc

There's 50 or so comments on the thread saying 'it happened to me, it happened to my sister in law, I was meant to be a boy'
But when you look at that rationally that means most were years ago, and 50 people out of thousands that find out the sex is a small percentage!
Still debating the extra scan but will leave it a few days before I decide!

Anxiety is a bitch [emoji24][emoji24]. X


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[atomic sagebrush]

I will tell you as probably the only person on here who had a baby 26 years ago (and most of the people now having babies are even older than that) the difference in ultrasound technology and use between then and now is HUGE. They didn't do early scans, they didn't even do them for screening in mid-pregnancy unless you were high risk (and if you were high risk, they did amnios, not ultrasounds!). They generally did them late in pregnancy for due date confirmation - this was the only reason I even had one with my first pregnancy - or if the baby had stopped moving. And you couldn't see ANYTHING on the pictures. They were nothing like the shots we get now. Nowadays everyone is having 3-5 scans and you get all these amazing pics but not long ago they didn't do any of that. So all the same issues apply - only having one scan, late in pregnancy when it's hard to see gender....these things just don't mean what you think they do. You don't know what any of these people's story is - when their scan was done, who did it and why, how much time they took...none of it. your scan is crystal clear and in the perfect age group for guessing!!

My family has a story about "he was supposed to be a girl!" My parents had decided not to find out gender but had a late scan prior to having a scheduled c-section (too late to see gender!) My stepfather, who was a paramedic and not trained in ultrasounds, thought he saw a vajayjay on the screen and he of course wanted a boy so he was flipping out and depressed for the whole rest of the pregnancy but when my brother emerged, he blurted out really loud "My kid's got BALLS!" LOL. But yeah ever since they would tell everyone "he was supposed to be a girl! Saw it on ultrasound" even though it was too late in pregnancy to see gender, and the person who allegedly saw gender was not a trained ultrasound person anyway!! This is the story behind most of these "wrong ultrasounds" once you get the actual scoop. :)

Take that 100 pounds and go shopping. :)