I am so confused...

[Mariola]

I do not even know where to begin..so here goes nothing. I have one boy and we are thinking of ttc pink. When i got my boy i had a big cyste on my ovary (found out at the 12wk ultrasound). I also ate a lot of bananas, was quite active and ate cereal with maca and oils with vit e. Also vitamin pills etc. Dh was still studying and also active but eating bad. We were not trying to conceive my ds and we probably dtd just a few times without protection. We are both quite thin.

Now im still breastfeeding my ds (he is from april 15). I am thin, bmi around 18/19. Eating oatmilk with powdered full grain cereal, in the afternoon 2 to 4 slices of dark bread and for dinner mostly pastas or rice. In between i love sweet snacks.

My cyste is gone. It has been quite the hot summer here and my dh cycles every day 90min to his work. Also we were having colds (sick) a lot this summer.

I am so confused on what to do. I would like to start a le diet but as i am naturally thin and loose weight easy, i am afraid. Also, what about supplements..is only saw palmetto and folic acid ok? And what dh? Some abreviations do not make sense to me, i am not a native english speaker. I do not work out, and i know myself, i will never be able to do that 6 times per week. Anything else im missing?

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[atomic sagebrush]

You can do the LE Diet without losing any weight! That is fine! Just eat however many calories you need to keep weight on, but still limit protein to 40-50 g (you can up this to 50-60 g if you have PCOS or need to eat more to keep weight on and limit fat to 30-60 g (50-60 g for PCOSers and those who need to keep wieght on.) Since you're breastfeeding, I would like you to start off 2000-2200 calories and 50-60 g protein and fat, you can reduce that over time but I do not want you to lose ANY weight at all, you're already at my minimum weight for TTC.

:agree: giving up the cereal and vitamin pills. Bananas very likely make no difference but you can leave them out if you prefer.

:agree: hubby biking has been shown in studies to sway pink!

I would not have you do spearmint tea, saw palmetto, or baby aspirin. These things have not worked anyway and none are ssafe when breasteeding. Avoid at all costs!

Calcium/magnesium is at your discretion, please read my response to the previous poster above. If you want to use them, be sure you're getting the kind without added Vit. D and be sure you're not eating massive tons of dairy.

Coffee is said by other sites to sway blue but they are incorrect. I have a full explanation of how their science is flawed and outddated here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/56791-vices-swaying.html Coffee has been one of our most solid sway tactics and I do recommend adding it in if you like it. I got my daughter drinking coffee after getting 4 boys with tea.

Everyone should take folic acid! 1200-1600 mcg a day

Any abbreviations you do not understand, please ask me! That's what I"m here for.

We have found that exercising even just 4 days a week has still been effective. But if you can't do exercise, just focus on what you can do. I got my daughter without exercise - I just didn't have time to add it in.

[Mariola]

Sweet of you to answer me. When i come across any more abreviations i do not recognize, i will ask (:

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[Mariola]

I have another question. As my first pregnancy was an oops i always wanted to do my second pregnancy by the books. So lots of super healthy food and supplements etc. But the girl diet with the cafeine, alcohol, no supplements and le diet feels unhealthy to me and i am scared this also will affect the health of the baby. Is this true?

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[atomic sagebrush]

The LE Diet is not unhealthy. I based it on the recommendations of the World Health Organization for a safe and healthy pre-pregnancy diet. It is simply the lower level of a normal pre-pregnancy diet. And according to several nutrition-based organizations both governmental and private in the US, Europe, and Australia, only folic acid/folate (which we all take) has ever been shown to help make a healthy pregnancy when taken before conception. Everything else is fine and safe to start at BFP.

Coffee 1-3 servings a day and alcohol 1-2 servings a day are fine prior to pregnancy and you can cut back at BFP (and of course drop alcohol.) This is a normal intake and what many many people do anyway.

I have a more indepth explanation here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/24628-le-diet-faq.html

On this site, safety is first and foremost. While I"m always happy to explain the reasoning behind certain recommendations, we actually offer the safest and sanest sway recommendations online and I would never, ever, EVER suggest anything I thought could harm an unborn baby. Whenever we get even a hint that something may be harmful we eliminate it from the mix and we've already done this with lots of different things like cranberry and Sudafed. :)

[Mariola]

Thanks atomic! Did you ever hear about an 'african study' that had 90% succes rate? Something to do with the mucus..

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[Mariola]

And another question about the diet. So for pink we should eat foods with high glycemic values? What about taking krill oil supplements or cinnamon? Thanks for your time (:

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[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks atomic! Did you ever hear about an 'african study' that had 90% succes rate? Something to do with the mucus..

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Yes, I've heard of it. When things sound too good to be true, they usually are. Somewhere on here I went through and completely debunked it (I"m trying to find it, but not seeing it right now, does anyone know where it is?? it's from earlier this year.) I have people showing up on this site who tried that method and went on for 2+ years not getting pregnant. So if you'd like to start off using it, by all means, just be careful you're not
a)doing that plus a million other things that will cut odds of conception
b) doing it for longer than 2-3 months absolute max before dropping it
c)losing massive amounts of weight and taking gobs of supplements that will mess up your cycle
d)going on so long not getting pregnant that you panic and then start swaying blue just to get pregnant.

[atomic sagebrush]

And another question about the diet. So for pink we should eat foods with high glycemic values? What about taking krill oil supplements or cinnamon? Thanks for your time (:

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I prefer that you not worry about glycemic values and just stick in the limits for fat, protein, and calories. The more detail oriented we become with our sways, the more meaningless little things we worry about, it starts to turn us into control freaks and that undermines our sways. So just stick in the limits of the day and let the glycemic index worry about itself.

No Krill Oil, that may sway blue.

Cinnamon only for those with 30-50 lbs or more to lose or who have pretty severe PCOS and some weight to spare AND who are not taking anything else in terms of sway sups.

[Mariola]

Thank you so much!

I read somewhere that the colder months, sept oct nov etc sway blue? I am not sure but should i ttc in september already? For dutch standards it has been a VERY hot summer but in fall it tends to get cold fast. Even freezing already during the nights. (Dh has been cycling the whole summer for 80 min p day and will continue this). I have not been on a 'monitored' le diet for long (since a few weeks now) but as my bmi is on the low side (currently 19 but mostly around 18.5), i normally eat already like being on the le diet. I ate meat just once or twice a week and also potatoes once or twice. Only things extra i picked up since a few weeks are the more coffee and some alcohol as well and the folic acid (which i will now change to folate). Oh and i started skipping or delaying breakfast.

What do you think? I do not know if there is any truth in this theory..i conceived my son in july but it was a cold summer.

What is more important, staying longer on the le diet and my other sway tactics or ttc in sept with all the extra benefits of this extra hot summer still fresh? Also dh was quite sick this summer, me too (fever, coughing, throat aches). Must lower our conditions right? Oh i almost forgot, i was considering picking up cardio for at least 4 times a week.. but i didnt yet? Better start doing that and wait ttc?

Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge! Up till now it has helped me loads!

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[atomic sagebrush]

The seasons may matter a tiny bit and you can read about that here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/1693-seasons-swaying.html I would not personally hold off for that reason, swaying matters far more, this is just a few percentage points. I got my daughter in the boy peak months and 2 boys in the girl peak so that shows you about how well it works. :)

It is not temperature that matters, it's probably something to do with day length. if the temperature mattered the peak would be in wintertime. Another site claims winter sways blue but that is not based on science at all, unlike the seasonal peak we're referring to, which is based on a couple of very well done studies.

Length on diet matters by far and away more than seasons. We don't even know how seasons work, and since I think the evidence indicates it is probably day length and not temperature, it would be a step in the wrong direction to shortchange yourself on diet (which we KNOW time on diet matters because we've seen it in our results) in favor of a theory which we are guessing as to how it works.

Exercise is one of our best sway tactics but given your low weight you'll need to boost food intake to compensate. :)

[Mariola]

Thank you so much for clearing that up for me!

I am getting a bit overwhelmed.. now i read in an old thread that allergies may sway blue because when you have allergies you produce more mucus and have higher levels of cortisol. I have a pretty bad allergy to horses and mild allergy to cats, dust and grass. I have a hernia, also causes inflammation. So then i started reading about cortisol and how you should lower it and it says you have to eat nutrient rich foods and drink no coffee or alcohol.. drink black thee instead. Soooo confusing.

What about a herb like ashwagandha? It says to be an adaptogen. When something like cortisol is too high it lowers it and vice versa.

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[Mariola]

Or red reishi mushrooms.. they inhibit testosterone. And rhodiola reduces cortisol as well.

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[atomic sagebrush]

Please just do what has worked for most people most of the time. We don't know how cortisol sways anyway. There is evidence pointing both ways and also a lot of evidence that indicates it's totally neutral.

PLEASE do not start taking a bunch of herbs. We do not know how they sway and if they are safe.

if you link me to the thread I can read and comment on it. Many of the old threads were from before we knew what we know now and our results are higher than ever before, so we are on the right track now and the old days were much less successful.

Many of us with all boys have allergies and autoimmune diseases. (myself included and I actually got my daughter when my autoimmune disease had already started...and it CAUSES inflammation.) We don't know why. But we are still getting good results with swaying the way that we do things and I find that the more "experimental" people get, the worse their results. People who take various herbs have their cycles get very irregular, they take much longer to get pregnant, have more miscarriages, and none of the herbs people have taken for swaying have worked.

[atomic sagebrush]

Or red reishi mushrooms.. they inhibit testosterone. And rhodiola reduces cortisol as well.

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But we don't even KNOW that testosterone sways. Clomid raises testosterone and it's one of the best sway tactics that we have.

The fact is, we don't know how swaying works. Some people think it's testosterone, but it has never been proven. So it is really a huge step in the wrong direction for people to go out and find herbs that are supposed to lower testosterone, when we don't even know if testosterone is swaying, and what's worse, if those herbs have other effects that could undermine your sway, you would be hurting your sway by taking them regardless of how they affect testosterone.

I ONLY want you guys taking herbs I have seen many people take and get their desired gender. As it sits now, NO herbs (not for pink OR for blue) have worked in any consistent and reliable way and all the herbs have messed up people's cycles, prevented conception, and even possibly caused miscarriages.

Just do what has worked for most people most of the time - diet, exercise, one attempt, Clomid or Femara if you can get them, and then for DH, jogging/biking, smoking if he does already, possibly olive leaf extract and soy milk.

[Mariola]

Can you take clomid safely without consulting your doctor as i am pretty sure here in the Netherlands they wont give it to you without being tested and found less fertile..

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[atomic sagebrush]

Technically you aren't supposed to. Some people still take it anyway. it's available in some other countries freely over the counter or they order it online.

[Mariola]

Hi atomic, quick question. I have been on the diet since july. We wanted to start trying in october. But from 30 sept till 5 oct we are going on a holiday in a hot country plus normally hubby rides his bike 80 min per day and during our holiday he wont. Do you think we should wait till november? Thank you soooo much (: (ttc pink)

[atomic sagebrush]

No, please do not postpone any longer. That short period of time doesn't matter.

[Mariola]

And to start 60 min cardio everyday from now till mid oct? Too late? Only excersize i did so far is the normal taking care of a three year old kind... thank you so much in advance

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes do start exercise! While we originally worried that it could be started "too late" over time since exercise has been so very consistently high for us, we decided that any theoretical "risks" to starting too late counterweighed the benefits of exercise. And since our numbers did not drop at all once we changed that, it appears that exercise is good no matter what.

[Mariola]

Hi Atomic, we are planning to start ttc in november. Im on the diet since beginning of august. Got my AF today. Last 3 cycles were 35, 29 and now 27 days. My cycles are always irregular but mostly not as short as 27 days. Can that be because of the diet and excersize? Also im on the thin side and even though trying not to, i lost 2kgs since august. But that is also because my son wakes up a lot at night and he keeps me running around all day. Just to know if this shortening cycles are ok?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, diet and exercise can change your cycle, but 27 days is actually totally normal. Do you know when you're ovulating in relation to this?

[Mariola]

Thanks atomic. No clue about ovulation, didnt want the stress of tracking just yet. But looking at cm, must have been around the 6/7/8th of october. We did dtd late eve of 30 sept, i still had a bit of AF spotting so thought it would be ok (unprotected). Checked monday (1 oct) and wednesday (3oct) with opk but they were negative.

[Mariola]

Oh to be clear, my af is weird. Dark brown and started with light cramps. Normally also starts light but get medium cramps after 2 or 3 days. I guess i have to wait and see. Could i be pregnant from that dtd on 30 sept?

[atomic sagebrush]

There's very little likelihood that BD on 30 Sept. could get you pregnant with those days for ovulation.

So it sounds as if your LP is ok. Anything longer than 10 days and even if you Oed on the 8th that would still be 11. Just be aware your ovulation is happening a little sooner than it has in the past.

It's not unusual for your period to change while swaying, it will likely kick in in full force soon. I really doubt you could possibly be pregnant with that timeline!

[Mariola]

Dear Atomic,

This morning on the clear blue 4 day digital test i got a flashing smiley. It says that that means it detects a raise in estrogen. Should we bd tonight or wait for the solid smiley that detects lh? Thank you so much in advance.https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20181101/1b105be59057c9c7d1a6561bee2bc47b.jpg

[Mariola]

Ps. I am om cd12 now.

[Mariola]

Ohh haha i see a lot of people asked and are asking the same question. My cheapy opk has just a very faint line. Probably when i believe in timing i should bd next flashy smiley otherwise at the first solid one? Doesnt matter which brand shows the first solid positive right?

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh gosh sorry only just now seeing this, Halloween set me back a couple days.

If you want to do timing, you would BD on the SECOND flashy smiley, not the first. If you don't care about timing and just want a good chance of conception, BD on the first solid smiley.

[Mariola]

Yes well the cheapy opk still has no line at all so i will wait..

[atomic sagebrush]

well, just keep in mind that you can have false negatives on OPK, too. So if you wait too long, you risk missing the entire month.

[Mariola]

Thanks Atomic, I will test with the clearblue tomorrow morning again. If its a solid, we bd immediately. If its a flashy again..no clue what to do. According to my app, ovulation is due around the 7th. But that is totally unreliable because my cycles are not the same length. Last month was 29 days, before that also 29 and the one before 35 and 31.. today is cd13.

[Mariola]

Still a blinking smiley...

[Mariola]

Oef, how long are those blinky ones supposed to last? This is the fourth...

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes the apps are really not very helpful at all to anyone without a regular cycle.

You have the option of having sex now to cover, and then waiting for the solid to have sex again. If that happens within 2 days, stick to the attempt you've already had. If 4 or more days out, then have another attempt. If 3, flip a coin and do what the coin says. OR you can just to every 4 day method in the "every 72 hour" pattern.

You can have those pesky flashing smileys for many days prior to solid, so while it's really annoying, just keep testing. Most of the time it will go solid eventually.

[Mariola]

Thank you so much atomic! Is it possible I missed my ovulation? I started testing in the morning of cd10, got an empty circle and cheapy opk got a faint line but the darkest till now... today is cd16. No lines to see at the opk but still flashy smileys. Only other month I tracked my cycle was july and got pos opk at cd22. But that was before diet. Last 2 months cycles were shorter.

[atomic sagebrush]

It's possible to have false negatives - but given that you started testing CD 10 it's more likely you just haven't surged yet.

[Mariola]

Hi Atomic, hope you catch this question today (:

See attached pic of opks. The pink is the normal one and the blue is the extra sensitive opk. Shall i wait one more day to bd or is tonight the night?

Before today the pink ones showed no lines and this is the first time i used the extra sensitive one. Thanks in advance (:https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20181108/f41abb08750dad5794f180eb0390b34f.jpg

[atomic sagebrush]

I would BD as soon as possible. I want you to BD with the first positive of any brand and not wait for the OPK to agree with each other because you may never get a positive on the less sensitive one.