New to swaying - PLEASE HELP!

[4thtimeacharm]

Hi, i'm the proud mama to three little boys, and we've made the leap to try ONE more time for the little gal to complete our family. I just weaned my last little guy (1 year), and have just ovulated for the first time since getting pregnant with him. i'm 36, so ideally, i'd like to be preggo ASAP -- each of my babies are 2 years apart, and i'd like to keep that age gap going. I've scoured these boards to figure out the latest and greatest with diet sways these days, but am so overwhelmed. I initially started the mineral diet, because when i conceived all of my boys, I was a high sodium consumer, and NEVER ate dairy, so figured that theory may hold water for me. But now, reading these boards, i don't know what to do. My questions are these...would love feedback from you all who have been down this road!!!

Right now, i'm on a low cal diet, while still restricting sodium. I'm skipping breakfast, and eating two meals, one at noon and one at 6. i'm trying to do bland pasta, white fish, roasted veggies, plain matzo and yogurt. I drink two large cups of coffee and usually have wine in the evenings (i've been pregnant or nursing for the past 5+ years, so in the few weeks i'm NOT, i like to indulge!) The no salt/blandness is killing me and i'm not sure i can keep it up. is it truly not really necessary?

I'd really like to start trying mid-september, but am i shooting myself in the foot by not being on the diet long enough? i'd hate to put myself through this ringer and not tip the scales at all.

i've got three little kids and work full time - i don't have a ton of idle time for exercise. do i definitely need it? i weigh 118lbs and am 5'4, so not overweight. i've already taken off three lbs after being on the diet a week.

One more question - just curious what you guys think. My husband and I debated about doing hi-tech. We can afford it, and sometimes i think we should just try it that way, but something is holding me back. i know it's a personal choice, but given the experiences that people have had in this group already, would you consider it if you were me? This will definitely be our last shot at a girl.


THANK YOU for your help and support!!

[ksmom]

Hi and welcome!

Your diet sounds pretty LE friendly, but need to make sure you're getting enough fat/cals/protein. You can definitely have salt and spices on LE. The diet is much easier to stick to if you include salt/flavorings. You need sodium anyway for normal body functions. Your BMI is at a point where you shouldn't lose more weight so you may need to up calories to keep stable. Remember ALL foods are allowed, but it's best to avoid fortified ones like cereal.

Regarding HT, if you can afford it, do it!! I swayed for my third and now I'm planning to go HT because I know I cannot handle hearing boy for a fourth time. If you need a guarantee, do IVF. Time isn't on your side at 36 so I think HT would be the way to go. Swaying will always be there.

[atomic sagebrush]

Just real quickly, and then please give me a bump for tomorrow, if you have the ability to do HT, I suggest doing it! Your odds of IVF do not improve with age so I don't want anyone to think "oh ok I'll sway first and then if it doesn't work, I'll do IVF later." Swaying is not a guarantee, you can get an opposite and so if you have the means to do IVF/PGD, I really do recommend it.

That having been said some people prefer to sway and that's fine too. Just let me know how I can help and bump this and I'll be back to answer your other questions as soon as I can!

[4thtimeacharm]

thank you so much! yes, after reading through some fails, i'm thinking maybe i ought to go for the guarantee...especially given my age!

two questions for you if I did risk it and go for the sway:

Would I be shooting myself in the foot if i tried to conceive after only being on the diet for 4ish weeks? or should i wait to try? I hate to let a month go by without an attempt given my age, but each of my three boys was conceived on the first shot, so i know it's possible to be one-and-done.

Second, based on what i've read here, I think i'd plan on BD every four days. does that sound right?

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

[4thtimeacharm]

thank you for the feedback! yeah, i'm beginning to think i should seriously consider HT at this point. The decision is so hard, but time is ticking. I wanted to keep my hopes up that I could get lucky with a natural girl, but need to keep remembering that a fourth boy is in the cards -- i'd love him to death, but it's so hard when i consider that will definitely be the end of my girl road. appreciate your response!

[atomic sagebrush]

1)If the spirit moves you, you can still take supplemental calcium/magnesium, and limit sodium, while doing an otherwise LE Diet. This is what many people have done. Others of us (myself included) got boys eating tons of dairy/taking calcium and limiting sodium, so that element was easier for us to move past. Please do what is going to make YOU feel the most comfortable with your sway. The only thing to watch out for is that you don't get calcium by simply upping dairy intake. take calcium supps instead since dairy is loaded with other nutrients and nutrients tend to sway blue. make sure that any calcium supps you use do not have added Vit. D as Vit. D may be a strong blue swayer.

2)We have relaxed significantly both on diet overall and on the sodium restriction and our results are higher than ever. You do NOT need to be that restrictive and it does no good to aim at a goal you simply are not going to be able to hit. What happens is either you'll get sick of it and give up, OR the self-control you would need to stick to such an unpleasant diet may inadverntently sway blue anyway (for reasons we don't understand, things that are very detail oriented and take large amounts of constant and unremitting effort may sway blue regardless of diet)

I got my girl without calcium or dairy and eating tons of sodium after getting my 4th boy taking massive calcium/magnesium doses and limiting sodium. So I promise it is possible.

We need to additionally be sure that you are getting enough nutrients coming in. LE Diet is not only about limits, it's also about ensuring you have enough nutrients coming in to continue ovulating and get/stay pregnant. Can you do a quick tally on fat, protein, and calories? I want to be sure you're getting enough.

Coffee and wine are 110% fully allowed on this site and we've gotten great sway results with them.

What is your age?

How long have you been on your present diet? A week? Or longer??

We have seen much better results with diet 12 weeks or more, but acceptibly good results even after 6-8 weeks. So my recommendation would be to split the difference and wait out one more cycle (while eating a better, easier to stick with diet)

Please take care not to drop below BMI 18.5 under any circumstances, and at BMI 21 is where I like you guys to stop losing and hold steady where you're at. You are already at BMI 20.3 so we need to up cals to stop weight loss now. If a small amount more sneaks off that's ok, but do not drop below that BMI 18.5 under any circumstnce and by stopping weight loss now you give yourself a margin of safety in case a small amount does come off over time.

[atomic sagebrush]

thank you so much! yes, after reading through some fails, i'm thinking maybe i ought to go for the guarantee...especially given my age!

two questions for you if I did risk it and go for the sway:

Would I be shooting myself in the foot if i tried to conceive after only being on the diet for 4ish weeks? or should i wait to try? I hate to let a month go by without an attempt given my age, but each of my three boys was conceived on the first shot, so i know it's possible to be one-and-done.

Second, based on what i've read here, I think i'd plan on BD every four days. does that sound right?

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I discussed the time on diet in the above post. But let me tell you what I DON"T want to see people do and it may help you decide. I don't want people to assume that 2-4 weeks on diet is ok (because our data indicates it is not) but more importantly, I also don't want you guys to do like 20 weeks of very strict diet before even starting to sway and then starting off swaying doing a super strict sway with tons of sway tactics that make it take forever to conceive. We are trying to thread a needle here between slightly reduced fertility and rendering yourself unable to conceive. So it's ok to start trying a little sooner (particularly if doing gobs of sway tactics - not sure if you are planning that, or not) but at the same time, if you're not doing tons of strict, conception reducing sway tactics, it may behoove your sway to either wait for the 12 week mark OR to split the difference like I said and start off with one attempt + diet 8 weeks, as an example. there's a lot of wiggle room between having a half-hearted sway and going completely overboard and we just want to find the spot that feels right to you, where to aim at. :)

Unless you're over 40 I would have you start off doing the one attempt at positive OPK or the day before you expect ovulation instead. E4d may be slightly more blue friendly than one attempt so I like you guys to start off doing one attempt for at least 1-2 months before moving to e4d.

[4thtimeacharm]

Got it! i'm in the back half of 36, so time's not on my side, but i've got a few years until 40, so it sounds like i should keep a diet going for at least a cycle before an attempt -- i've only been on it a week. Also, i lost 3lbs the first week (though i assume it was water weight by drastically cutting sodium), so i will definitely up my calories and relax the restrictions. got it on the dairy supps - that's great because i'm borderline lactose intolerant and a glass of milk is not my friend. Appreciate ALL of the feedback -- you are amazing!

One last general thing -- is there any truth to advanced maternal age swinging pink? i've heard that, but wonder if your stats support it.

THANKS A MILLION!!