Ready to TTC after loss

[shiroshiro]

My last two cycles since my d&e have been very short (26 days) but I've tried to maintain my post pregnancy weight ay 54kg (I was 49kg pre pregnancy).

I've been eating meat since my loss (previously vegetarian).

The interesting thing is, my BBT is about 0.5 degrees higher overall compared to earlier this year. I've been temping for 2 cycles (3 eggs) now and we are ready to try again.

Just got my first flashing smiley. We have been casually doing BD every 2-4 days including yesterday. Do we keep BD everyday until my peak solid smiley? LH surge isn't here yet, my strips normally do get super dark. That is estimated to happen in 2 days (according to my app calculations). Or, should we wait a day until and BD during dark strips?

[atomic sagebrush]

That's not very short, that's just slightly short. Still totally normal range.

:agree: Just hold steady on weight, no need to gain more.

I'd wait a day because we don't want hubby to be totally depleted by the time the egg shows up. Then hit it with daily attempts through O. Maybe even two on the day you expect O to occur.

[shiroshiro]

Hey Atomic, still flashing smiley today and no LH surge at all, testing twice a day with strips. Normally it's very dark so I know what to look for. Should we abstain today until we see the surge? Last cycle, solid smiley appeared for 2.5 days before temp spike.

[atomic sagebrush]

Any update?? When this happens I'd go to every other day release for hubby as a way to let his sperm recover but still avoid longer abstains!

[shiroshiro]

Ok we skipped 2 days because kept getting flashing smiley and still this morning, the LH strips aren't showing the surge!

Skipping too many days might turn into one attempt in fertile window?

Would flashing happen if I missed the surge? Temps show no uptick at all so doesn't feel like I missed it.

[atomic sagebrush]

That's fine, just go to every other day now.

Yes it could turn into one attempt in fertile window, let's say your strips never go positive (it can happen) and then it just works out so your attempt of (for example) 4 days prior was still hanging on, then you've got one attempt! So I like you guys to do every other day if hubby can, becasue that way you're ensured of having 2 attempts in the fertile window no matter when O happens.

Flashing can happen if you missed the surge, but I"m suspecting based on temps it hasn't happened yet.

[shiroshiro]

Update!

Monday morning was still flashing. Monday night was solid and confirmed by opk strips. BD on Monday night.
Tuesday the temperature shot up by 0.5 deg Celcius! BD Tuesday morning and Tuesday night.

But did we only get 1 attempt because a temp rise of on Tuesday means actually O happened on Monday?

[atomic sagebrush]

One day of temp rise can't tell us if ovulation really happened that day.

While we don't want people actively waiting till temp rise occurs because that ~can~ indicate ovulation has taken place (some people used to try that for blue...wait till temp went up and then attempt) what studies have shown is that it's not possible to pin down day of ovulation any better than one out of three days. Because any one temp can be a fluke. Your low temp may have been a fluke, your high temp may have been a fluke, I've even seen people with BOTH their low and high temp was flukes and then they went on to actually ovulate days later! It is only by waiting for the 3 days of elevated temps that we know that ovulation most probably has occurred, but we can't say if it was one day or the other...just too much flukeyness going on for that to be reliable.

So long story short, "worst" case you had 1 attempt with Shettles timing, best case, 3 all with Shettles timing. We can't know what really happened, unfortunately.

[shiroshiro]

Yep so today is Thursday (for me in APAC) and 3rd day in a row of elevated temps. Anyway managed to get 1 attempt a day since OPK went positive on Mon night, and twice on Tues. Once yesterday (Wednesday).

Glad to hear the temps are not necessarily 100% indicative. Also my previous cycles indicate that it takes me 2-3 days after LH surge and solid smiley for temp to go ip.

We also slept in a different room each night from last Sat to Monday, so all the variance in rooms, beds and patterns may have caused temping fluctuations.

Thank you Atomic!

[shiroshiro]

One more question, I wasn't trying to do any timing/Shettles method. Just reading the forums here I thought I was just trying to get as many "attempts" as possible? Did I misunderstand?

[atomic sagebrush]

Perfect!! Yes i agree the musical beds could absolutely have affected your temps. I think you were in with a great attempt!

No your'e right, we want as many attempts as possible. We have to take into consideration, though, that men can run out of steam and/or lower sperm count by having lots of ejaculations in a row. Since we want max numbers of sperm during the fertile window, we have to take some care in when we have those attempts so we're not making them too soon - since DH may not be able to perform later on and/or may be shooting dust if he's totally depleted.

It's just a matter of timing those many attempts to occur during the fertile window rather than tiring DH doing tons of attempts before the window opens, if htat makes sense. :)

[shiroshiro]

Yupp thank you!

In 2WW now and my temps starting at 7dpo jumped up consistently at another half degree Celcius! Making my BBT the same during my last pregnancy earlier this year in May... could it be?

I temped every morning at 6am, eyes closed haha and today it's still elevated at 13dpo... No positive yet.
Btw last pregnancy i spotted a faint line at 13dpo


Temps seem indicative to you?

[atomic sagebrush]

Hmmm...is there any way you could have ovulated later than you think?

[shiroshiro]

Re: ovulating later, I considered that too. Could be possible... except in that case we would've had almost 0 attempts if it were prior to the second temp rise. Time will tell and I'll try give you and this forum more data.

I'll test again tmr on 14dpo. Running out of FRER sticks! To be honest, are FRER tests any more sensitive?

[shiroshiro]

AF came. Perhaps you're right that possibly the LH Surge might have happened twice, I ovulated later, hence a longer cycle (35 days, as opposed to my normal 28 day average). Would that be why my cycle was longer?

[atomic sagebrush]

AF came. Perhaps you're right that possibly the LH Surge might have happened twice, I ovulated later, hence a longer cycle (35 days, as opposed to my normal 28 day average). Would that be why my cycle was longer?

Yes that's the most likely explanation - delayed ovulation. Can you think back about 14 days? Have any symptoms of ovulation at that time?

[shiroshiro]

I got the LH surge and solid smiley on 15th Oct. Assumed that O will happen on 16th or so. But there was no EWCM and that's a very normal sign for me. However 18th Oct I had marked down EWCM so perhaps the real O happened on 19th... Making the luteal phase correct (12 days) with my delayed AF.

We missed that second surge because I wasn't planning it.

What should I do this month, knowing that I am prone to this?

[atomic sagebrush]

I would have you BD every other day after the attempts around positive OPK and if you notice any EWCM try to sneak in another attempt even if later on.

[shiroshiro]

Ok thank you Atomic!

What else can be a measure of ovulation apart from temps staying up and EWCM?
Also, is EWCM more of a pre-ovulation / during-ovulation sign?

[atomic sagebrush]

Libido and mood.

EWCM can come at any point in time - while I'd say as a general rule it's more of a pre-O marker, it can def. happen that you don't notice it till O is just about to happen. And you can sometimes get it even for a day or two after ovulation (this has happened to me personally several times!)

I personally have a very (very LOL) dramatic mood shift at ovulation. That's always my surefire way of knowing "ok yep it's ok to BD unprotected now" but sadly that's right when I totally don't want to ha ha.