Long time going and no luck

[PinkDaisy]

Hello,
I've posted a while ago and i have been at a stand still. I've been doing le since November and had our first attempt in February, Since then, we had an attempt in April, but unfortunately I have a history of loosing ovulation and loosing too much weight. Over the last few weeks, I've got what appeared to be positive opk 3 different times over 2 weeks so we attempted but I don't know what's happening to my body. I haven't had a real period since end of April, very minor spotting end of May. I know I'm considered underweight now but I feel like I am eating more than enough. I was in this situation a few years ago before seeking fertility treatment. Not sure if we should take a break...what I can do. I've added the eggs, full fat dairy, 3rd meal, salmon or beef once a week. Confused and frustrated....any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

[atomic sagebrush]

Can you tell me more info about your BMI and the amount you're eating??

[PinkDaisy]

Can you tell me more info about your BMI and the amount you're eating??

Sure! I used to write everything down and a typical day was about 1800 to 2000 calories, 50-65 grams of fat, 40-50 grams of protein. A typical day had coffee with a drop of milk... about a 14 hour fast before eating first meal. A lot of fruits.. usually an apple with peanut butter, whole milk yogurt with berries, salad, rice cakes. I would eat a "meal of snacks". Carrots with hummus, crackers, fruit snacks, popcorn, pretzels.... dinners are a lot of veggies...squash or eggplant, more salad, veggie burgers with low carb wrap. Sometimes chicken or turkey... salmon or beef once a week. Usually 4 eggs over the weekend. A second coffee with Splenda..or with sweetener if eating with a meal. Wine every night. I feel like I'm eating a lot of carbs but my bmi has dropped to about 18. I definitely have cheats a lot.

[atomic sagebrush]

Up calories to 2000-2200 and 50-60 g protein and fat, no less than that.

Are you counting the small amounts of protein and fat in fruit and veg, and anything in low carb veg? If so, don't.

I do not want you to lose an OUNCE more. Eat however much it takes to keep weight on even if you have to exceed 2200 cals. If you can't get enough calories with the 50-60 g, up this in 5 g increments until you're able to get the cals in.

[atomic sagebrush]

and drop fiber if you are taking it

[atomic sagebrush]

are you taking cinnamon or myoinositol?

[PinkDaisy]

are you taking cinnamon or myoinositol?

Thanks for the responses! I dropped fiber a while ago..just eat high fiber foods sometimes. I do not count anything in the fruit or vegetables except if I bake them with oil. I used to put cinnamon in my coffee but haven't in months. Not sure what mysotol is but don't take that. I just take folic acid.
I have been eating more.. more cheats... my doctor does think I have a mild case of pcos due to Cysts and now irregular cycles, but I just can't pass up those occasional sweets. Not sure what else to do at this point. Feeling like it's not meant to be.

[atomic sagebrush]

Well, having your cycle disrupted from PCOS and from low weight are really two different things so it may very well be you NEED those occasional sweets to keep weight on.

Have you talked to your doc about possibly doing Clomid or Femara? And has your husband ever had a sperm analysis?

[PinkDaisy]

Hello....
I hope this post doesn't get lost..I replied to it so you knew some of my history. The day after I last posted, I found out I was pregnant. Unfortunately, I had a miscarriage and struggled with coming back on here or even trying to get pregnant again. Since them, I've continued to live a "le" I think girl sway lifestyle. I've been maintaining my bmi around 18.5 and seem to be ovulating. I'm considering attempting again. I feel like I've just become adjusted the a le lifestyle. Usually 14 hour fast, 2 cups of coffee, low protein, high veg and fruit diet. What else can I absolutely do? I'm going to try some exercise if I can keep on weight. My dh dropped ole...should he start again? Any feedback would be greatly appreciated as I consider this journey again. Thanks so much!

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh no I'm sorry to read this.

Can you tell me about how many calories, fat, and protein youre eating?? I want to be sure you are getting enough.

I would be very hesitant to have you do exercise with such a low weight.

OLE is something I don't particularly even believe in. Smoking and jogging/biking are by far more effective for him. Fine if he wants to try the OLE but if he's stubborn, it's not worth fighting over.

Most important thing aside from what we've mentioned is one attempt (or e4d method if you prefer)

[PinkDaisy]

Thank you so much for your response. He stopped the ole, but does take things like milk thistle, cq10, l carnitine and multi vitamin ...not sure if those mean anything. He exercises about 3x a week, but not biking or running...he does cardio though.
I will stick to no exercise for now if that's what you think is best. Right now I eat 3x a day...probably 1800 to 2000 calories...40 to 50 g of protein and 60 or so fat. That's when I used to write everything down....now I'm just eating what I always have. Lots of fruits and veg....I don't count anything in them. I do have some hummus and carrots, peanut butter and apples...yogurt and fruit...lots of salad...lots of snack cracker foods...meat about 1x a week and picking at my kids some other times. I do eat...sweets are hard to resist too. Thanks for any feedback...I so appreciate it.

[atomic sagebrush]

The multivitan and carnitine may sway blue for him

What multi is he on?? There are a couple on the market that are worse than nothing so I want to check that for you guys.

We don't know how milk thistle sways - if he needs it for health he should continue but otherwise I'd probably have him wean off.

Coq10 may sway blue for hubbies but we don't know for sure. It's likely minor at any rate.

I do want you to up your food intake a bit more as per my previous post.

[PinkDaisy]

The multivitan and carnitine may sway blue for him

What multi is he on?? There are a couple on the market that are worse than nothing so I want to check that for you guys.

We don't know how milk thistle sways - if he needs it for health he should continue but otherwise I'd probably have him wean off.

Coq10 may sway blue for hubbies but we don't know for sure. It's likely minor at any rate.

I do want you to up your food intake a bit more as per my previous post.


Thank you so much. I am trying to eat more. I feel like I eat a lot but guess cause it's a lot in one sitting to avoid snacking. My husband takes alive multi gummies right now. Also, apple cider vinegar gummies and fiber gummies. I was doing the fiber gummies too occasionally. Should I just do fiber pills or no fiber at all. I've been eating a lot of high fiber foods like wraps with veggie burgers a lot. Thanks again!!

[atomic sagebrush]

You can always add in a meal if you need to.

It's fine if he needs the supplements for health, otherwise he should wean off.

[atomic sagebrush]

Since your weight is a bit on the low side I'd skip fiber for you.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks again! Unfortunately he needs these for health issues. Does this ruin things? I dropped fiber gummies daily but do take them here and there for my own digestion issue. Last cycle I got a positive opk on day 22... my bmi has dropped below 18.5 again despite the amount of food I'm eating, so I'm nervous it will go beyond day 22 again. Anything else my husband can do since he needs these pills? He's cut back on meat a little, but that's all. Anything else I can do? Thanks!!

[atomic sagebrush]

No, if he needs them for health he should continue them. It's unlikely that what DH does makes much of a difference.

Eat as much as it takes to keep weight on.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks again...I seem to be maintaining my current weight which seems to be 2 pounds below what is necessary to not be considered "underweight". I think we may attempt this month for the first time in a while and maybe one more month after that before we decide to end this journey. I'm on day 16 right now...last month ovulated on 22. I'm starting to notice the gross amounts of ewcm but no positive opk yet. I've never tried a douche but am curious since lately I get gross amounts of ewcm...sorry tmi but every time I see it I think that's why I have made boys. I've read it cuts conception...what about the antihistamine? When and what type do you suggest for that? I believed I used one last time...my pregnancy that ended in miscarriage. I'm assuming the antihistamine had nothing to do with it. Thanks for any feedback!

[atomic sagebrush]

Considering how long you've been trying I think it is a very bad idea to add in douching and antihistamine. Both were proven by a statistician who analyzed our results for us, to do nothing. Both douching and antihistamine will cut odds of conception hugely and we have not found EWCM to really be very strongly linked with sway outcomes. We have tons of CM opposites going every which way. I myself got a boy with no visible CM and then got my girl with noticeable CM.

if you MUST do one, please get a vinegar and water douche from the store and use ONE 6-8 hours before you plan to do one attempt, and skip the antihistamine.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks for all of your feedback. We never ended up attempting that month. Just finished af, so we may attempt soon. I’ve been maintaining my weight which is on the cusp of being underweight. One thing I have not eliminated are my sweets here and there. I’ve always thought as long as it’s “with a meal” it wasn’t terrible. I just saw your sugar post and I feel like I’ve just done it all wrong. I’ve been told I may have Pcos tendencies at times. I eat an apple a day and some mixed berries in yogurt...those ok? I will drink sugared coffee, but only if it’s with a meal. Maybe I’m still consuming too much sugar? Thanks again!

[atomic sagebrush]

That is for people with PCOS though!! If you are underweight any PCO tendencies you may have will be non-existent and at that point you need to do whatever it takes to keep weight on.

Sugar with a meal is fine for most people. An apple and mixed berries in yogurt is fine for everyone. Some sugar in coffee when you're already underweight is no big deal for the majority of everyone (exception those with severe PCOS, but you don't HAVE THAT.) You are worrying based on advice that was not even directed towards you.

The people who have issues with sugar are those with a lot of weight to spare and/or with moderate to severe PCOS. Several of those people were then insisting on following the standard diet (telling themselves it would be better for their sway) and having skim dairy, gummy worms, and very high carbs. That is not applicable to you - first of all because you didn't need that type of diet, and secondly because you're not eating that type of diet anyway.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks for clarifying that! I feel much better!

[PinkDaisy]

Hi again... I’m on cd 16 and taking opks as last month I got a positive opk day 19. Still negative but wanted to double check on the bd/release pattern. We bd cd 13... since I’m hopefully close do we hold off on bd till it’s positive.? Should dh release in the mean time.? Thanks!

[atomic sagebrush]

Unless you're going for abstain I'd have him clean the pipes once.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks! We did that... I’m on day 20 and no sign of positive opk yet. I’m afraid the stress and possibly dropping another pound is delaying ovulation. Should I keep waiting for positive or take the every 4/day approach at this point. Thanks!

[atomic sagebrush]

Totally your call to make. Follow your gut instinct.

[PinkDaisy]

Thanks again.. on day 20 it looked like the opk was positive so we attempted. I ran out of opk so didn’t continue. Days later I was feeling crampy and starting to get EWCM. I knew something was up with my body,..stressed..loosing more weight. I started taking OPKs again and they looked like they were on their way to positive. I was getting frustrated that I probably was having a delayed ovulation.. we bd again on day 28 cause opk looked positive. But it was super positive on day 30. I left it with that last attempt..
Not even sure what chances are there with that cutoff and being a late ovulation.
Feeling frustrated.. sorry for the rant!

[atomic sagebrush]

I would really strongly urge you to do e4d now. Continuing with the positive OPK method with that long a cycle is just going to end up with you being frustrated the whole month and possibly missing it.

You're in with a chance, as you will ovulate 24-36 hours after the FIRST positive, not the darkest.

[Thirdtimelucky01]

Can I just clarify - if I use digital OPK I will BD on the day I get the first positive OPK (solid smiley face) regardless of how dark the line actually is, right? Because on the day it turns to peak fertility for me (solid smiley) the test line on the stick is not always very dark and it takes another two days to have it as dark as control line.


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[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's right. As long as it's truly positive (as dark or darker than the test line, or solid smiley on the digi test) you BD. Don't wait for the darkest line, which may never come