5 months of trying No BFP :/

[Girls Mom 2]

Hi Atomic,

Again i got my periods..now its almost 5 months of trying and No luck..everything seems fine..my periods are regular..i ovulated perfectly every month..we r doing good attempts, taking all vitamins prenatels..i dont understand why i dont get my bfp... i visited my family doctor today and she reffered me to the fertility center... so now what?? should i wait till i recieve a call from fertility center and should i tell them about my sway?
i am feeling really hopeless i turned 40 yesterday. and this month wasnt really good too as i couldnt manage my he diet and excersise and snaking.. also my doctor was like its all 50 50 chance whenever you try.. ther is no gender selection kind of thing exsists its not in our hand. i know you have plenty of reserch and info on this topic and i felt really good when i found this site and you.. i did everything i possibily can do to follow you and i was really hopeful to get my son but now i m feeling devastated..i just feellike to giveup to have a baby coz no point to have another girl on this age and circumtances.
plz i need your suggession or may be i need a encouragment or something i dont know.. :(

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[atomic sagebrush]

Doctors have done no research into any of this so don't worry what they say. In fact I generally recommend you guys don't discuss it with your docs because they do nothing but upset people and treat them badly.

Please tell me everything you did that may have cut odds of conception. Attempts, anything hubby was doing...not the diet really but the things that may prevent sperm from meeting egg. We have lots of tricks we can use to boost odds of conception but I need to know what you did to start with. Thank you!

[Girls Mom 2]

Doctors have done no research into any of this so don't worry what they say. In fact I generally recommend you guys don't discuss it with your docs because they do nothing but upset people and treat them badly.

Please tell me everything you did that may have cut odds of conception. Attempts, anything hubby was doing...not the diet really but the things that may prevent sperm from meeting egg. We have lots of tricks we can use to boost odds of conception but I need to know what you did to start with. Thank you!Thank you soo much.. I dont know what exactly preventing dh is following the diet not smocking. We were Trying during the fertility time each moth max 4 attempts were made..last month we tried more attempts also used preseed..but after O i didnt do any attempt....Now i am on my CD 6 again i start doing proper he diet, so please guide me how to proceed this time....

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[atomic sagebrush]

I would definitely continue after you think you've ovulated in case of delayed ovulation.

Do you have EWCM on your own? We may want to reduce the Preseed. Some people have seemed like it may have cut chances of conception when they used a lot.

[Girls Mom 2]

I would definitely continue after you think you've ovulated in case of delayed ovulation.

Do you have EWCM on your own? We may want to reduce the Preseed. Some people have seemed like it may have cut chances of conception when they used a lot.i cant say how much EWCM i have coz today is cd 7 and i am a.little wet downthere already... it comes and go throughout till my next period.. i definitely get more wet during my fertile period but i cant say its enough or not???

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[atomic sagebrush]

If you're already getting it on CD 7 I suspect you are making enough on your own. I would try skipping Preseed or cutting way back on it in case it's having any ill effect.

[Girls Mom 2]

If you're already getting it on CD 7 I suspect you are making enough on your own. I would try skipping Preseed or cutting way back on it in case it's having any ill effect.Thank u soo much i will not use preseed..its cd8 and we did today. so now my attempts should be cd 10, 12, 13,14and then after O how many???

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[atomic sagebrush]

I would do one CD 15 in case of delayed O and then go to every other day till your husband says "no more." :)

[Girls Mom 2]

I would do one CD 15 in case of delayed O and then go to every other day till your husband says "no more." :)[emoji846]okay..thank u once again...also i wanna ask you something its may be a little childish but i am feeling it might be the reason i m not conceiving?? its everytime when we do our attempts i feel its leakedout.. even so many times i did in night and then i slept..but in the middle of night i got really wet coz of leakout.. is it okay?? i mean normal??

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[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that is totally normal. That is how your body is designed. Somewhere between 20-30 minutes after sex, the semen liquefies. The healthy sperm have all left to go into the cervix by then. The liquefied semen takes out the dead and dying sperm and is kind of a neat way your body helps to get rid of pathogens at the same time. This actually is totally beneficial to your chances of getting pregnant by getting rid of dud sperm, getting rid of the semen (which reduces chances of infection) and taking out any pathogens in the vagina at the same time.

[Girls Mom 2]

Yes that is totally normal. That is how your body is designed. Somewhere between 20-30 minutes after sex, the semen liquefies. The healthy sperm have all left to go into the cervix by then. The liquefied semen takes out the dead and dying sperm and is kind of a neat way your body helps to get rid of pathogens at the same time. This actually is totally beneficial to your chances of getting pregnant by getting rid of dud sperm, getting rid of the semen (which reduces chances of infection) and taking out any pathogens in the vagina at the same time.oh wow... thats really amazing and interesting..thank you :) i am not worried anymore about leakouts... so now its cd 10 i did unprotected sex in the morning and now i get peak on my easy@home ovulation kit.. so now i should do my 3 attempts?

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[atomic sagebrush]

Yes go ahead and do 3 attempts but I do want you to have an extra attempt or two afterwards in case you ovulate later. CD 10 is a little early for peak.

[Girls Mom 2]

Yes go ahead and do 3 attempts but I do want you to have an extra attempt or two afterwards in case you ovulate later. CD 10 is a little early for peak.yes this time i will do more attempts after ovulation. Thank you soo much atomic :)

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[Blue-blue-pink]

Not sure this will help you but 5 months of trying is not that long hun.
It took my 20 months to get pregnant of my third! (My daughter) and I didn’t even sway, so there wasn’t even anything that could decrease my chances.

[Girls Mom 2]

Not sure this will help you but 5 months of trying is not that long hun.
It took my 20 months to get pregnant of my third! (My daughter) and I didn’t even sway, so there wasn’t even anything that could decrease my chances.oh.. i am just worried coz of my age i just turned 40 and its really making me feel like what if i cant get pregnent now.. what i ended up with only two daughters.. u know.. but thank you for making me feel little less worried :)

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[Blue-blue-pink]

Ah I understand hun! I was worried about that too when trying for my third. I was 37 then. At 40 it may not go as quick anymore, but I believe it’s still a good age to get pregnant! Sending you all the luck you can use and above that, my blue dust!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

oh.. i am just worried coz of my age i just turned 40 and its really making me feel like what if i cant get pregnent now.. what i ended up with only two daughters.. u know.. but thank you for making me feel little less worried :)

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I got my 4th boy at 39 and my girl at 4, very much in normal range. While it is harder for some people to conceive at 40+ we have found it's really more after 43 that the average person starts having trouble.

[Girls Mom 2]

I got my 4th boy at 39 and my girl at 4, very much in normal range. While it is harder for some people to conceive at 40+ we have found it's really more after 43 that the average person starts having trouble.Thank u atomic, also i did my 3 attempts.. and now its cd 14 still i guess in fertile window..? but i m totally dry now.. i am going to do again tonight..

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[atomic sagebrush]

keep going till you are absolutely sure you've ovulated (even every other day is fine)

[Girls Mom 2]

keep going till you are absolutely sure you've ovulated (even every other day is fine)okay sure.. i will do every other day. :)

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[Girls Mom 2]

okay sure.. i will do every other day. :)

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using TapatalkAf here again..and this time its even a bit early its cd 25, i have 28 day cycle. Anyhow anything u can suggest for next cycle ??

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[Blue-blue-pink]

Are you sure it’s AF en not implantation bleeding?

[Girls Mom 2]

Are you sure it’s AF en not implantation bleeding?ohh its kind of spotting.. i m not sure.. but i have all symptoms like Af..back pain n all..

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[Blue-blue-pink]

I understand. However those symptoms can also mean pg. You have to want or take a test

[Girls Mom 2]

I understand. However those symptoms can also mean pg. You have to want or take a testi was really disappointed that i didnt even care to notice but after you mention now i noticed its a darkcoloured spotting.. may be its not Af.. ill see if its still same ill go for test thank u :)

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[atomic sagebrush]

Any update??? FXFXFX

[Girls Mom 2]

Any update??? FXFXFXahh its same spotting atomic , i dont know..what to do??

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[hurrem]

Fingers crossed for you Girls Mom! I hope this is your month xx

[Girls Mom 2]

Fingers crossed for you Girls Mom! I hope this is your month xxThank you hurrem but i guess its Af coz home pregnancy test came negative :/ i still have just spotting dark brown.. and not a proper flow... but i guess its a start of Af.

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[atomic sagebrush]

Let's wait and see how many days it takes for your proper AF to arrive. It very well may still come on time, and this is just spotting and you won't have a 25 day cycle. Can you please update me when proper red flow arrives? Till then we need to at least consider the possibility you are pregnant and it's just not registering on a test yet, so no drinking and medication, that type of thing.

[Girls Mom 2]

Let's wait and see how many days it takes for your proper AF to arrive. It very well may still come on time, and this is just spotting and you won't have a 25 day cycle. Can you please update me when proper red flow arrives? Till then we need to at least consider the possibility you are pregnant and it's just not registering on a test yet, so no drinking and medication, that type of thing.Okay! the first day of my last period was 18th August and yes i have 28 day cycle.. so i was not expecting my Af on 11th sep but i noticed Dark brown spots in my white trouser yesyerday morning so i thought its Af and i put pad but still its just darkbrown/ kind of wine colour spotting in my pad and its not much.. i have a minor lower backache as well. i will tell yO

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[Girls Mom 2]

Okay! the first day of my last period was 18th August and yes i have 28 day cycle.. so i was not expecting my Af on 11th sep but i noticed Dark brown spots in my white trouser yesyerday morning so i thought its Af and i put pad but still its just darkbrown/ kind of wine colour spotting in my pad and its not much.. i have a minor lower backache as well. i will tell yO

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using Tapatalksorry about half message it was my daughter interruption.. i will tell you as soon i get my proper flow.. i am just hoping its not Af [emoji1696]

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[Girls Mom 2]

sorry about half message it was my daughter interruption.. i will tell you as soon i get my proper flow.. i am just hoping its not Af [emoji1696]

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using TapatalkFinally its Af.. proper red flow started last night.. i dont understand why 2 days just brown spotting came.. so now any suggestion for next ttc??

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[atomic sagebrush]

It happens sometimes (and for some people it happens every time.) Your LP isn't over till the bright red flow comes. It shouldn't have any ill effect for conceiving.

Let me reread our conversation and then comment on what to change if anything.

[atomic sagebrush]

I would definitely continue after you think you've ovulated in case of delayed ovulation.

Do you have EWCM on your own? We may want to reduce the Preseed. Some people have seemed like it may have cut chances of conception when they used a lot.

So what I want you to do is reduce or drop the Preseed if you have EWCM. And after intercourse please spend part of the time laying down on your stomach instead of just your back (this has helped several people conceive).

What is DH doing for release before your attempts?? What supplements are you guys taking?

ARe you having unprotected sex before the 3 attempts??

I definitely want you to continue to keep going after you think you have ovulated but I also want to be sure you're not having the attempts too late and missing it.

[Girls Mom 2]

So what I want you to do is reduce or drop the Preseed if you have EWCM. And after intercourse please spend part of the time laying down on your stomach instead of just your back (this has helped several people conceive).

What is DH doing for release before your attempts?? What supplements are you guys taking?

ARe you having unprotected sex before the 3 attempts??

I definitely want you to continue to keep going after you think you have ovulated but I also want to be sure you're not having the attempts too late and missing it.Okay! so i already dropped Preseed last 2 cycles.. i have good EWCM this last month. some months its good amount and some months its a little low.. dont know why??
DH is taking Zinc 50 mg and he also start taking Men's Most Complete Multi..We hve unprtected sex 1 /2 times before the 3 attempts.and continue 3/4 times after.
My supps are Elevit prenatal+ 5mg folic+Vit D1000iu+ Probiotics.
i wanna ask one thing..i have easy@home ovulation kit and i dont use any other thing to predict ovulation. last 2 cycles opk shows ovulation early like On cd7 i got very clear possitive. do u think may be its giving me wrong possitive?? should i do something else ?


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[atomic sagebrush]

There's natural fluctuation in amount of EWCM. It is very likely even in

I want your husband to wean off the extra zinc and keep to the amount in the multi.

Can you give me the brand name of the multivitamin or a link to it?? I can't find it under that description.

I want hubby to also take the VitaminD and the probiotic. I'll tell you more after I see what specifically is in the vitamins he's taking.

Oh so you're having these attempts CD 7 ish, and then nothing after??? I think you're missing ovulation! When is your period coming after this, like you're saying CD 25??? If your LP is 10 days long, that would put ovulation at CD 15, and even if it's 14 days long, that's still CD 11. CD7-10 attempts are way way too early.

[Girls Mom 2]

There's natural fluctuation in amount of EWCM. It is very likely even in

I want your husband to wean off the extra zinc and keep to the amount in the multi.

Can you give me the brand name of the multivitamin or a link to it?? I can't find it under that description.

I want hubby to also take the VitaminD and the probiotic. I'll tell you more after I see what specifically is in the vitamins he's taking.

Oh so you're having these attempts CD 7 ish, and then nothing after??? I think you're missing ovulation! When is your period coming after this, like you're saying CD 25??? If your LP is 10 days long, that would put ovulation at CD 15, and even if it's 14 days long, that's still CD 11. CD7-10 attempts are way way too early.Thank you Atomic, this is the Multi vitamin dh is taking.. we will wean off Zinc now..
I am calculating my 3 attempts based on my Opk so now if you think i m missing my ovulation/ attempting too early so when will be the best time to do 3 attempts?? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20190915/2c674c7ba93bcc0fd41f6ac0cd7dfbab.jpghttps://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20190915/7d366add94f78234640dc53130c8e4ec.jpg

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[atomic sagebrush]

Yes he's already getting plenty of zinc in those.

Those aren't terrible, but they do have higher doses than I like to see. If he likes them that's fine to continue, if he doesn't, he may want to wean off to one that has more like 100% of all the vitamins.

Since there's already 1000 IU Vit. D he doesn't need more.

If you're having attempts based on CD 7 positive OPK with a 25 day or more cycle I'd say we have solved our problem! Your attempts were too early (at least in those months). This is actually good news as it's an obvious problem we can easily fix.

Are you continuing with OPK after that??

[Girls Mom 2]

Yes he's already getting plenty of zinc in those.

Those aren't terrible, but they do have higher doses than I like to see. If he likes them that's fine to continue, if he doesn't, he may want to wean off to one that has more like 100% of all the vitamins.

Since there's already 1000 IU Vit. D he doesn't need more.

If you're having attempts based on CD 7 positive OPK with a 25 day or more cycle I'd say we have solved our problem! Your attempts were too early (at least in those months). This is actually good news as it's an obvious problem we can easily fix.

Are you continuing with OPK after that??okay we will see if we can find something better then this for Dh.
i dont know if i dont use opk then what is the right way to know exact ovulation? i got good Cm on the same timmings as well and after 3 days of peak my opk turns negative.. ?? but i m happy to finally know may be the reason why i am not conceiving.. should i purchased another brand?? any good suggessions??
my Af just finished today.. now what should i do??

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[atomic sagebrush]

Can you keep testing with your OPK after that? You will likely see another surge that will be the actual surge.

You can have symptoms with those false surges because it's the hormones that make both the symptoms and the surge. So when one happens, the other happens, even if ovulation DOESN"T happen!

Is your cycle nearly always 25-28 days long?

[Girls Mom 2]

Can you keep testing with your OPK after that? You will likely see another surge that will be the actual surge.

You can have symptoms with those false surges because it's the hormones that make both the symptoms and the surge. So when one happens, the other happens, even if ovulation DOESN"T happen!

Is your cycle nearly always 25-28 days long?okay so now this cycle if i see early possitive then i have to wait anf keep testing right? and if i get another surge i will do my 3 attempts then...got it. Thank you soo soo much :)

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[Girls Mom 2]

okay so now this cycle if i see early possitive then i have to wait anf keep testing right? and if i get another surge i will do my 3 attempts then...got it. Thank you soo soo much :)

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using TapatalkAnd yes my cycle is 28 day usually and this last one was 25.

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[atomic sagebrush]

okay so now this cycle if i see early possitive then i have to wait anf keep testing right? and if i get another surge i will do my 3 attempts then...got it. Thank you soo soo much :)

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I would have 3 attempts early just to cover, and then keep testing. I suspect with almost 100% certainty you'll get more positive OPK a few days later that will indicate your true ovulation, and you can attempt again then. This won't hurt your chances of blue at all (remember, timing does not sway!)

It is pretty rare to have anything more than a 14 day LP and practically unheard of to have anything more than 16 days. When you go longer than that usually there is a cyst and that would make its presence known because you'd stop ovulating and getting your period. So there is practically no way you are ovulating CD 7-8-9-10 range and then going 18 more days before your period arrives!!!

[Girls Mom 2]

I would have 3 attempts early just to cover, and then keep testing. I suspect with almost 100% certainty you'll get more positive OPK a few days later that will indicate your true ovulation, and you can attempt again then. This won't hurt your chances of blue at all (remember, timing does not sway!)

It is pretty rare to have anything more than a 14 day LP and practically unheard of to have anything more than 16 days. When you go longer than that usually there is a cyst and that would make its presence known because you'd stop ovulating and getting your period. So there is practically no way you are ovulating CD 7-8-9-10 range and then going 18 more days before your period arrives!!!okay thank you soo much

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[Girls Mom 2]

okay thank you soo much

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using TapatalkAtomic i wanna ask you one more.thing its about Ph levels.. you must have already answer about it in detail anf sorry if i again bother you for this but actually i just dont understand that with he diet and specially with lots of red meet n sodium how can my ph will alkaline?? i m.not even checking my ph levels anymore but i m sure its acidic..will this effect my boysway??


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[atomic sagebrush]

pH doesn't work. We saw tons of pH opposites (including my own; I got a boy with a pH of 4.5-5 range that never went up till after I was already pregnant) and after it happened several dozen times, I did a bunch of research and found out it was biologically impossible.https://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/11684-ph-pickle.html

The HE Diet does not have lots of sodium (unless you choose to eat it, which is fine) it just has a normal amount. The red meat is not for pH. The HE Diet is meant to make you guys more fertile and overall in better condition and none of the old school sway stuff. Some people choose to include those things and I try to make it easy for those who do, but that's never been the point of HE Diet.

Your pH is most likely alkaline around ovulation because that's when everyone's is alkaline. The entire body (both men and women) is meant to make pH in the 7's around ovulation because that's all sperm can survive in. Both X and Y sperm thrive in medium pH, not high, not low. Low pH and high pH BOTH kill sperm and all the claims they make on other sites are just nonsense.

[Girls Mom 2]

pH doesn't work. We saw tons of pH opposites (including my own; I got a boy with a pH of 4.5-5 range that never went up till after I was already pregnant) and after it happened several dozen times, I did a bunch of research and found out it was biologically impossible.https://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/11684-ph-pickle.html

The HE Diet does not have lots of sodium (unless you choose to eat it, which is fine) it just has a normal amount. The red meat is not for pH. The HE Diet is meant to make you guys more fertile and overall in better condition and none of the old school sway stuff. Some people choose to include those things and I try to make it easy for those who do, but that's never been the point of HE Diet.

Your pH is most likely alkaline around ovulation because that's when everyone's is alkaline. The entire body (both men and women) is meant to make pH in the 7's around ovulation because that's all sperm can survive in. Both X and Y sperm thrive in medium pH, not high, not low. Low pH and high pH BOTH kill sperm and all the claims they make on other sites are just nonsense.Thank you soo much again.. i stopped checking Ph but somewher in my mind i was like what if i have very acidic environment.. its clear now.. thanks to u again. :)

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[Girls Mom 2]

Thank you soo much again.. i stopped checking Ph but somewher in my mind i was like what if i have very acidic environment.. its clear now.. thanks to u again. :)

Sent from my SM-G955U1 using TapatalkDear Atomic, Now i have a situation.. i guess this time i get ovulation right on time its cd14 and today i get my possitive on opk also i have alot of stretchy egg white Cm present..the situation is i have very bad cold n flu since a week now and i was taking advil and tyenol due to headache also i couldnt properly eat.. so now what should i do ? i really want my 3 attempts coz i m feeling this is the right ovulation but i also dont want to ruined my sway?

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[atomic sagebrush]

IT's up to you, but unless you're really really dying I'd still go ahead and try. Sickness and medicine swaying pink is really just speculation and not anything we have hard proof that it really sways, and for all you know, you could skip your attempt this month only to end up trying in another month that was even worse for blue! Good luck and feel better soon!

[Girls Mom 2]

IT's up to you, but unless you're really really dying I'd still go ahead and try. Sickness and medicine swaying pink is really just speculation and not anything we have hard proof that it really sways, and for all you know, you could skip your attempt this month only to end up trying in another month that was even worse for blue! Good luck and feel better soon!yess.. agree.. i dont want to skip month either..thank u atomic :)

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[Thirdtimelucky01]

yess.. agree.. i dont want to skip month either..thank u atomic :)

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I was sick as a dog with bad cold when I conceived my DS1! Blue dust to you :)


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[Girls Mom 2]

I was sick as a dog with bad cold when I conceived my DS1! Blue dust to you :)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalkaww thank you soo much.

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[Girls Mom 2]

Af is here again :(

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[atomic sagebrush]

Tell me everything you did and I'll see what, if anything to tweak.

Try to keep in mind that when you were having your attempts on CD 7/8 you really weren't having attempts and now the clock is reset. You're basically starting over again and so it will still take the same time on average. It takes people 3-6 months of GOOD attempts to conceive. Those other months can't count in your head the same way because you didn't have a chance of conception. :heart:

[Girls Mom 2]

Tell me everything you did and I'll see what, if anything to tweak.

Try to keep in mind that when you were having your attempts on CD 7/8 you really weren't having attempts and now the clock is reset. You're basically starting over again and so it will still take the same time on average. It takes people 3-6 months of GOOD attempts to conceive. Those other months can't count in your head the same way because you didn't have a chance of conception. [emoji813]Atomic i just want you now to tell me everything i should do.. coz i really wanna start a whole fresh sway.. i was sick last 20 days i am on antibiotics rightnow also i m taking naproxine for rib pain i am eating poridge and very light food. i think after this i should skip a month and then start again.
i am feeling i should even drop the idea of having 3rd baby :(

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[atomic sagebrush]

I agree I think you should maybe take a month and regroup here.

I want you to keep in the front of your mind that many of those months you were trying, there was no chance of conceiving. While I know it's frustrating, you can't count the months the same way and so you need to tell yourself you really only tried for a month or two so far.

For all we know, this may be exactly what needed to happen to get you that boy!!

[Girls Mom 2]

I agree I think you should maybe take a month and regroup here.

I want you to keep in the front of your mind that many of those months you were trying, there was no chance of conceiving. While I know it's frustrating, you can't count the months the same way and so you need to tell yourself you really only tried for a month or two so far.

For all we know, this may be exactly what needed to happen to get you that boy!!yes i think i will regroup again in dec and after i finished my antibiotics i start following he diet again for my next attmepts. thank tou atomic for the encouragement :)

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