Ttc #4 in 2020

[Lailanela]

Hi everyone,
I've been reading here for a few weeks, but now i thought i should introduce myself. My hubby and I want to try for another baby in July 2020.
We have three kids, a girl and two boys and I would like to give it a try for pink. Although I would be just as happy with a boy.
I already thought about it a lot and i am totally happy with our way. The only difficulty for me is, that so many people seem to think that 4 kids (oftentimes 3) is way too much. That bothers me more than it should. Maybe some of you know this problem, would be nice to read something encouraging.

[ksmom]

Hi and welcome! I wouldn't mind what other people say. People will always have their opinions and will give it, wanted or not. My MIL made a comment recently how my DH and I don't "need" a fourth child :rolleyes: simply because we're busy enough. We also used to get a ton of comments from strangers about having three boys but not as much anymore. Don't let the opinions of others drag you down. If you and your DH want another baby, go for it! Good luck and pink dust!

[4blue2pink]

i have 8 and get comments all the time, some nice-some not so nice! people will comment no matter what, dont let it get to you you aren't having your family to please others. good luck with your sway! :)

[SoFullofHope]

People can be such idiots sometimes and have an opinion on everything. Your family is nobody else's business!
I think it's awesome that you would like to have one more!
Someone once said to me that you only regret the children you didn't have, never the ones you've got - and I think it's oh so true.
If you and your husband would both like to have a fourth one, go for it!

Fingers crossed for a pink bundle :XX:

[Lailanela]

Thank you all so much for your nice words, they really made me feel a little better with our decision. I know people give stupid comments all the time, even if you have just one child! I think it's more when the people who are close to me say something without thinking first, that hurts. But I know I should grow a thicker skin 😉
This is such a great site, you ladies here are so nice and helpful. It really feels great coming here. 😊
I have one question, I think I would start LE diet maybe in spring next year. Is there something maybe I could start now? I am already a vegetarian (for many years). Would it help if I ate less dairy and eggs? Or would that be stupid, I don't know? I don't think I could go full vegan, I just love cheese and eggs.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi and welcome! Let me know how I can help!

Many of us have the experience of people thinking we have too many kids. This often fades away as our kids get older and people get used to the idea of what our family looks like. Having a lot of kids can be busy, but at the same time it's also very helpful because they can keep each other busy playing and there are more people to do chores around the house and stuff! (not to mention hand me downs!)

[Lailanela]

Thank you very much Atomic. It's nice to read. 😊
Well I do have a few questions, although I plan to start the "real" sway in spring next year. But, maybe there are a few things I could do, that would already sway pink?
I've seen you recommend going vegetarian for some people (that aren't sure when they will ttc or that have a past with eating disorders). Well I already conceived all three kids eating vegetarian. Should I eat less dairy and eggs? Or wouldn't that make a difference?
Apart from that, I am still breastfeeding my 9 month old. And I almost always skip breakfast (because I have no time 🤣).
Thank you advance!

[atomic sagebrush]

I would just have you stay vegetarian. Swaying is like an iceberg, the things we see (like vegetarian diet) are so much smaller than the stuff under the water. So we can't ever just look at anyone's diet and say "well, they were vegetarian, this means a vegetarian diet doesn't work for them". Being a vegetarian may have been (and according to studies, WAS) swaying pink for you, but there was other stuff going on, plus luck, that in the end you conceived blue.

Breastfeeding a 9 month old means I want you to continue eating dairy and eggs. You are not swaying for quite some time, I don't want you to get restrictive on your diet at this point. Stay the course, keep doing what you're doing, including skipping breakfast if that's working for you, then when the time is right you can go on the full LE Diet at that point. For now keep doing what you're doing, you need to recover and your baby needs the milk supply to stay up. Plus eating more cals and fat in particular will help your ovulation to come back (if it hasn't already).

[LMSM]

Hi and welcome!

We will be trying for #4 in July 2020 also - and I have three girls so you are welcome to alllll the pink dust you'd like ;)
People will always find a way to snark at you - they're really just projecting their own insecurities or desires (might be jealous you get to have XX many kids,such genders etc) on you...;)

Good luck!

[Lailanela]

Thanks,
Great that you will also be trying for #4.
Yes I know some people just have to make a comment no matter what. I really have to stop listening. Other people even asked when I will have a fourth (quite short after delivery, not a good moment😂).
No, the more time passes (and baby boy gets bigger and bigger) the more I love the idea of having another. ❤
Thanks for the pink dust. 😉
You will be trying for blue?
If so take all my blue dust. 💙
Good luck!

[LMSM]

Thanks,
Great that you will also be trying for #4.
Yes I know some people just have to make a comment no matter what. I really have to stop listening. Other people even asked when I will have a fourth (quite short after delivery, not a good moment😂).
No, the more time passes (and baby boy gets bigger and bigger) the more I love the idea of having another. ❤
Thanks for the pink dust. 😉
You will be trying for blue?
If so take all my blue dust. 💙
Good luck!

Yep, swaying blue again! ;)I hope it works this time, am getting rid of all my youngest's stuff lol

[Lailanela]

Hey, everyone and especially atomic. I have a few questions, should I open another thread, or is this fine?
Well, our ttc time gets a little closer and I'm trying to work a few things out:
How do you count alcohol? Should I only drink it with a meal? Or if not, do I have to consider it as a meal? Is there a limit how little calories would be NO meal? (I would have the same question for coffee).
How much water or sugar free soft drinks should I be drinking each day? I drink too little and have always been(maybe 1,5 litres). Should I rather drink more or less?
And I guess mineral water is a bad option, because it has all the nutrients?
Would be low carb veg considered a snack? Or a meal? If I ate a salad only containing low carb veg, is that a meal or not?
And with exercise. I really want to try it and am already starting it (super slowly). I'm planning to walk (pushing a buggy) for one hour 5 x a week. But I also have to walk around 4 times each day smaller walks around 30 minutes. Since that's only 30 minutes, do I have to worry that this will sway blue?
And I'm still carrying my youngest a lot. (Sometimes really a lot) Does that sway blue?
Thanks in advance for every answer.

[atomic sagebrush]

Count cals only in alcohol.

Best to have with a meal but this is a "cheat" a lot of us did myself included, we had it between meals or when cooking dinner

I basically count any food as a meal. If it's unsweetened/artificially sweetened beverage or gum, between meals. Everything else counts even if it's like celery sticks or whatever

Drink to your level of thirst. No more and no less than you normally would

Mineral water is usually fine, I drank tons of seltzer. Some people might avoid club soda as it's supposedly "alkaline" but I don't think that matters a bit.

Even low carb veg needs to be with a meal.

As long as you've gotten in at least 4x a week with the 60 minutes, you can add in some 30 minute exercise times on top of that.

No, carying your baby is not the type of thing we worry about for swaying. PLEASE do not start worrying about small details like that. That is the kind of control freakishness that might sway blue.

[Lailanela]

Thank you so much for the quick answer.
I would have a few more questions, hope that's ok.
In the morning, I drink one coffee with creamer. It has around 50 cals, should I count that as my first meal? I'm drinking another one with a real meal.
How far in advance should I start fiber? Also 12 weeks? And I've read somewhere DH could also take fiber if he's willing. How far in advance could he or better, how close to our attempt would it make a difference?
Thank you so much.

[atomic sagebrush]

Does the creamer have sugar in it?

It is probably fine but if you can find one that doesn't have sugar that's probably better.

6-12 weeks on the fiber. Longer may be better, but at the same time it can make you more depleted than you would be otherwise.

[Lailanela]

It really does have sugar in it. I wouldn't have thought. Well I bought almond milk a few days ago and I'll try my coffee with that. Hope that will be better? I guess I just want to know how long I can count I'm fasting over night.

[Lailanela]

I'm sorry, I must be annoying but here I go again: so I can't seem to find a creamer without sugar. And I tried drinking my coffee with almond milk, but I don't like it at all. So, I tried it with artificial sugar (erythrit). I guess I will drink my coffee with that. So it says it has no calories. If I only drink my coffee in the morning with that, is it ok, that I don't count that as a meal? Thanks in advance.
(And yes, I hope I can stop being control freaky now.)

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes if you have your coffee with artificial sweetener and milk or almond milk it's fine, as long as you aren't having a large amount of milk/almond milk.

That does not count as a meal. We are all doing that and getting good results.