One more chance to get pink!

[DreamingofBoth]

One more time!

I was here in 2018, as I was trying for number two. I found this site probably a little late and we were in the process of trying for number two. I "tried" to sway from things I read online, however I ended up with baby boy #2. It has been great so far my oldest son having a brother but I can't help but long for a baby girl. I've always thought about three kids so i'm hoping the third times the charm (and finally talking my husband into number three as he was set on two). My son is currently 6 months old. I have yet to get my cycle back, so of course this will all depend on that. We plan to start trying later on toward the end of this year. I plan to nurse as long as he wants to.

For my first, i was nursing as well. Got pregnant on the first try (which was surprising when he was 15 months). we did kind of an every 3-4 days so I think that is more of a boy sway. I wasn't sticking to the LE diet very well. I did drink coffee and occasionally alcohol, but overall a more "boy diet" for sure with lots of oatmeal (in the morning as I heard it was good for supply) and meat. I took calcium citrate with D3 and magnesium as well as prenatal (which i see now don't work)

I have started trying to lose weight, by doing a type of intermittent fasting where I don't eat breakfast which I know (from reading on here) is recommended for girl sway. My lunch is typically chicken and salad, fruit, yogurt, veggies and then I have been having a meal replacement protein shake (protein powder 21grams, with oatmeal, teaspoon of chia and flaxseed, strawberries and almond milk) which has helped me lose weight. (I have tried to cut carbs like bread as well. I drink coffee daily and then drink alcohol occasionally. From what I have been reading, I "think" i know my cycle, but really could be wrong. I was just going by CM. I have never used OPK so i plan to start using them when my cycle returns so get an idea of my cycle. I read things like know your "peak" because 24 hours after that is when you typically ovulate. Also, I have read one BD is best for girl sway. Does that mean one BD all cycle (from the start of AF until O)? and I have also read that husband should abstain (<35) until the one BD. hot shower before, jump and dump. I want to make sure to get this right this time. I would like to have one more and I know nothing is for sure, but at least I will do what i can.

I forgot to add, I drink tea at night (caffeine free) mostly herbal stuff. I read somewhere on here that was not good for girl sway?

thank you!

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi and welcome back! Congrats on your new son!

We have actually had pretty good results with every 4 day method but I'd def. have you start off with one attempt.

I would like you to drop the flaxseed and chia seed. Flaxseed may not be safe, and they both may sway blue.

What is in the protein powder?? Any vitamins?

Most people give up oatmeal when swaying pink as the avenocasides in it may sway blue (although I suspect you have to eat a massive amount of oatmeal for that to happen!)

Have you been tracking your food intake at ll?? I don't want you eating any less than 30 g fat and I prefer 50-60 g for nursing moms who need their cycle to come back. I want to be sure you're getting enough. If you're not eating enough fat your cycle is not going to come back for a long time. Also, about how many cals and g of protein (not counting the protein and fat in fruit and veg, and the calories in low carb veg)

CM is not the most reliable way of knowing when to have one attempt. I do prefer OPK; while they''re not perfect, they're better than CM.

You can have protected sex other times or use pullout, but only one unprotected attempt in the fertile window.

Hub can abstain (although it's not seemed to add anything) but be sure it's NOT all cycle. No longer than 14 days max, and I prefer more like 7-10 days.

Tea (as in pekoe tea) seems to sway blue. I prefer you guys keep any herbal tea to 3x a week max, to avoid any medicinal effects. We honestly don't know how any of this stuff sways and if it's safe in huge intake, so I have been having you guys have herb teas only dietary amounts 3x a week, no more than that. You don't need to drop it totaly, just be sure you're not having any one kind of tea more than 3x a week.

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you! also i'm sorry for the multiple posts. I was trying to delete them because I found the different forum for TTC girl and thought it would be more appropriate here.

But thank you.

The protein powder is called "orgain USDA organic plant protein powder". it has 1billion probiotics and 21 grams of protein with a few vitamins. Basically just something I found that is helpful to curve my appetite until i dropped my baby weight, but also didn't think i was getting enough protein.

I will drop the chia and flaxseed. I put about half a cup of oatmeal in there, but I can stop that to.

I haven't tried tracking my food but I definitely can start. I don't think I am getting 50-60g of fat so I will keep an eye on that. Trying to lose weight and get my cycle back is going to be challenging haha! With my first, it came back about 9.5months (right now im at 6 months, which i know it can vary with each child). I also will eat yogurt occasionally. I probably get about 50grams of protein give or take a day (with the protein drink as meal replacement). Man, i should prob write this down ha. Sometimes i probably don't get many calories, esp with nursing. I probably get about 1000 calories about three days a week and then more when I am not working maybe about 1500. (thats a total guess, but I do eat more when I am not working).but I need to get an app to track.

Okay, I tried to track it using an app. So when I work (7 days out of 14) I get about 75g protein 30g fat 1100 calories. I didn’t add carrots because those are so sporadic. :/ the protein powder is new. I never have done this before. I just thought it would help me lose weight. Which is has been helping. Lol. When I’m off it’s not quite that low calories.

I will start using OPK this time when my cycle does come back.

One attempt in fertile window... I know you have written about "timing" but this is just before "peak" opk? or when it turns positive? and then abstain about 7-10 days before.

I will also cut back on the tea. Its not a necessity by any means.

I know you have also written about supplements. is it better to do a "less is more" approach? I did calcium citrate (with VitD) and magnesium for my second so I don't think that helped in any way so i don't plan on doing that again.

Thank you,

[atomic sagebrush]

No worries, I understand that and especially at the beginning since many forums don't answer every question. But I will answer every question asked, it just sometimes takes me a couple days.

The Orgain is a decent brand (not highly fortified) but it does have probiotics, which swayed so strongly blue that we dropped them totally for pink and now use them only for blue sways. But since it's taken as a food (rather than a capsule that dissolves in the intestines)

1000 and 1500 calories are not enough when you're nursing. Your cycle is not gonna come back for a very long time at that food intake and may even make your milk dry up.

You can do timing with one attempt (so estimate 2-3 days before ovulation) if you want to, but timing doesn't work. The only thing that works is the one attempt. So we plan our attempt at positive OPK simply because it's a good time to get pregnant with one attempt. So if you do want a cutoff that's up to you, otherwise I'd try at positive OPK.

Yep I definitely favor a less is more approach. I got my 3rd and 4th boys taking cal-mag-Vit. D and gave them up to get my girl, so I'm on board with you guys leaving them out.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you!!! i am going to try and up my calories some while still trying to do less overall "junk" and snacking. I going to look more into your recommendations on diet as well. I read your stuff on timing do I'm good on trying at positive opk and one attempt during fertile time. plus I think it would be more stressful to try and get it exactly 2-3 days before without getting too far and i know stress wont help is anyway. we shall see!!!! although first things first, is getting that cycle back. he has been sleeping through the night and just started playing with solids so maybe it wont be toooooo much longer. ha, never did i actually think I would "want" to have a cycle. anything, I am going to continue to browse on here and see what else I can learn.

Thank you!

[atomic sagebrush]

:agree: not only is it super stressful but in many cases it doesn't even work. People end up ovulating early and then panicking over not having the timing they wanted anyway. So the stress is all for naught since the body ovulates on a variable timeline!

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you!!

For my husband, (32) I know you said he can abstain (7-10) days but not 14... do you recommend BD protected as long as the one attempt is in fertile window. Basically, it doesn’t really matter what he does or what happens as long as protected and one unprotected attempt in fertile window?
Does there need to be a specific amount of time between last protected and one attempt? I know low sperm count is what’s trying to be done which also cut conception. Is it best just for him to Abstain for at least 7 days before the one attempt. So many things to try and get right!! Ah.

Also. Taking only folate while Ttc and no prenatal. What about it breastfeeding. Does that still apply.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes. None of the patterns of hubby releasing have mattered, what seemed to get the job done was that one unprotected attempt.

Most people do like to start off using one of the frequency patterns, abstain or daily release most commonly, along with the one attempt. But you don't have to, if it gives you tons of stress it's fine to let that go!

If abstain was "better" I'd have everyone do abstain, but it hasn't been. Both abstain and daily release have been lower than the overall site as a whole, for the whole time we've been tracking (nearly 10 years now!) They just aren't adding anything to justify the amount of trouble they cause.

There doesn't need to be a set amount of time between the last release and the attempt. So if you're worried that you'll have sex and then need to have an attempt the next day, it's no biggie. The worst that could happen is that your chance of conception might be lower. It won't sway blue though.

Yes, it still applies. If you feel like you just can't let prenatal go when nursing you can reduce it to 3x a week instead, but I do think you'll get best results for pink by weaning off it totally and giving your nursing baby a separate vitamin drop instead.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes. None of the patterns of hubby releasing have mattered, what seemed to get the job done was that one unprotected attempt.

Most people do like to start off using one of the frequency patterns, abstain or daily release most commonly, along with the one attempt. But you don't have to, if it gives you tons of stress it's fine to let that go!

If abstain was "better" I'd have everyone do abstain, but it hasn't been. Both abstain and daily release have been lower than the overall site as a whole, for the whole time we've been tracking (nearly 10 years now!) They just aren't adding anything to justify the amount of trouble they cause.

There doesn't need to be a set amount of time between the last release and the attempt. So if you're worried that you'll have sex and then need to have an attempt the next day, it's no biggie. The worst that could happen is that your chance of conception might be lower. It won't sway blue though.

Yes, it still applies. If you feel like you just can't let prenatal go when nursing you can reduce it to 3x a week instead, but I do think you'll get best results for pink by weaning off it totally and giving your nursing baby a separate vitamin drop instead.

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you! Sorry for the break! I adjusted what you said for diet and I think IÂ’m
About to start my period back in about two weeks. I want to get that regular and be on the diet longer before Ttc again. I also have to wean off of my prenatal vitamin. As I still take that. IÂ’m still nursing.

For the diet, I have no problem skipping breakfast. ItÂ’s actually been pretty easy for me. I just drink coffee which has helped. I know you say limit things like red meat, but does chicken need to be limited to? I ask because that is basically my main source or protein. Beside beans (which IÂ’ve read you so limit big okay) and yogurt, what other sources. I have cut down on snacking which is helping. But I still have some weight I need to lose I feel like IÂ’ve hit a plateau. IÂ’m doing my best to exercise at least 4 days a week but it is challenging with two kids. I prob have eaten more sweets over the past few weeks (from the COVID stuff) then i usually do which doesnÂ’t help so I really need to get back to it.

I donÂ’t eat a lot of bread. I tried to cut that out but IÂ’m reading that I may need to add some. I donÂ’t eat a lot of full fat either so I may need to up that to make sure to get the needed amount.

Basically LE diet , taking folic acid only, one attempt at opk positive.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hey, no worries, remember, it's not your job to get back to me, it's my job to get back to you!

:agree: being on the diet 12 weeks or more has been the most successful. No need to wait for your cycle to come back, we have tricks to deal with irregular cycles.

Are you staying within the limits?? 1800-2000 cals a day, 50-60 g protein and fat (because you are nursing). You can have chicken in those limits. You can have beans too in those limits. Some people refuse to count their totals and THOSE people might find it helpful to limit certain foods, but anything is ok within the limits. Other ideas are nuts, cheese, tofu, quorn, grain foods have some protein, and peas.

You don't have to eat bread if you don't want. You can have rice, pasta, or other grain foods like quinoa or kasha if you need carbs. Corn could also work.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you!! So in a nutshell...
Things to do

Folic acid 1200 a day
No breakfast (Intermittent fasting)
Fiber
Jump and dump/ Hot Shower before-
Low protein (50)
low calories (1800)
low fat (50)
No added salt
Coffee
Alcohol
one attempt In fertile window
No snacks/ keep blood sugar low
Diet Coke
Chicken
Empty carbs
Low red meat

[DreamingofBoth]

And exercise at least 4 times a week

[atomic sagebrush]

Looking great! Don't get too hung up on "keeping blood sugar low" though because if you do the diet you have laid out there you WiLL have lowered your blood sugar - you don't need to do anything actively to lower your blood sugar beyond that.

RE salt - most of us have given that up and our results are higher than ever. Makes it way easier to stick to diet without that, too. I got my daughter eating salt after getting my 4th boy while limiting it.

[DreamingofBoth]

Awesome thank you!! I get nervous. And I know that’s not helpful. But one last chance ha.

I’m new to this OPK thing. When do you recommend starting to test? I usually go by my body. Typically (I think) I ovulate in the middle of my cycle. So obviously, I will be using OPK this time since who knows if that’s when I really did. So do you recommend starting on a particular cycle day? Testing daily? And then bd when it is positive. Or when it’s peak?

[DreamingofBoth]

Also, I know you say no tea. Is chamomile tea a no go? I occasionally drink that after work. I work 12 hours (3-4 days a week) and it’s usually too late for me for alcohol lol.

[atomic sagebrush]

I would have you start the OPK before the earliest time you think you will O. This way you can see what it looks like to go from negative to positive and will understand in the future what it's going to look like. After a month or two you can narrow the window. The specific cycle day will depend on how long your cycle typically is, so if you have a 28 day cycle, you likely ovulate around CD 14, and would want to start OPK on CD 10 at the latest. you MAY even want to start them more like CD 8 so you can see them fully negative, then going to positive.

If you're using standard OPK then positive IS peak. Any time the test line is as dark or darker than the control, that is a positive/peak reading and you should BD at the first positive. Don't wait for the test to be "at its darkest" because that is something you will only recognize in retrospect. If you're using the Clearblue or similar tests that give "high" and "peak" readings separately, if you want timing you can have sex on the second "high" reading, and if you don't care about timing (it doesn't work) then have that one attempt at the first positive OPK.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay sounds good. Thank you.

I read late morning/afternoon Is best. I guess I’ll test once a day until maybe it gets darker?

Also about folic acid, I may be looking into this
Too Much, but the natures made folic acid? Is that’s okay. I saw it has a little bit of
Calcium in it though? Or would of be best to find a different one. Thanks.

[atomic sagebrush]

After lunch is best but you can test 2x a day, after lunch and before dinner, if you'd like.

That calcium is just a very small amount used to formulate the pill. It doesn't sway.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you. I figured I was reading too much into that.

So I got my first pp period back and I’m not on cycles 17 with still no positive opk tests. I have no signs (cm) either. I wonder if I should wait until I have another cycle or if I should continue testing. I don’t plan to start trying for a couple of months but I just wanted to see how my cycles were. I have been running and doing the diet so I wonder if that changes the cm at all. I know it can take a while for my body to regulate again but man! Lol.
After my first, when my cycle came back I could tell like clock work. Hopefully it will come back soon. I’ve been trying to make sure I’m eating enough. (I’m 5’3.5” and have been fluctuating between 131 and 133lbs) so I could still lose some to.

I am also still nursing so I know that can have an affect but I thought it would come back to stay like last time lol.

[atomic sagebrush]

Continue testing, you will still almost certainly ovulate. It can be very irregular for a few cycles when it resumes so don't worry about it being irregular, that's to be expected.

Your weight is good and so I suspect that things will be back to normal again quite soon. While my cycles came back quickly with my first two pregnancies, my subsequent ones were very irregular at first when they came back and that's what a lot of people report - the more kids you've had the more likely it is the cycle will not come back right away.

FX I hope things normalize soon!

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you. Hopefully. Lol. I’ve never done these before so it’s new to me. I usually go by “symptoms” and “my body”. I feel like that is pretty much out the window now. I think the LE diet has changed a lot of that. (But I still dk)

I had one day of cramps and a “higher” But still low opk and then it was extra low the next day (which happened to be today). I wonder if that was the positive (yesterday). Can you have varying levels of low med and “high” ops? I will continue to test and see if/ when my cycle starts and then see what happens next month to. But curious.

[atomic sagebrush]

The LE Diet does absolutely change the symptoms we are accustomed to (and that's likely part of how it works, changing hormones and such)

Yes it's possible to dance around with low, med, and high readings.

It may have been the positive and it just never got concentrated enough to read as positive. when in doubt attempt!

[DreamingofBoth]

So cycle day 38 still no period. Not pregnant. I guess since I’m still nursing, diet and exercise has probably messed that up. Hopefully I’ll start soon. With my first it was like clock work. Crazy how every baby is Different. I’m holding pretty steady about 129 (5’ 3.5”) so maybe my body will kick back into gear for ovulation and period. I hope.

Also I’m exercising at least four days a week. The other days are harder. Sometimes I can but sometimes I can’t. I work 12 hour shifts so sometimes I’m unable to work out then. Is that okay? We are very busy right now so sometimes I just get home and crash. But sometimes I’m able to run.

[atomic sagebrush]

When you work long hours like that we count that as a day of exercise. You do not need and shouldn't try to exercise on top of working 10-12 hour days.

You can, and likely still will ovulate. So if you're not ready to conceive you need to be using protection.

Being super busy can also mess with your cycle. I agree at your weight you should not be losing ovulation even with nursing but it may just be a cumulative effect. I would keep an eye out for ovulation symptoms.

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you. Ovulation could possibly be coming. I’m going to take an OPK tonight and just see what it says. We are using protection. I’m nervous to “try”. We are ready but i just want to do “everything right” which I know it’s not 100%. We are not in a hurry... we don’t have to be pregnant now but we are ready. With that being said would you recommend doing any type of dumping of the first “batch” and use the second immediately? Or shallow release? Or anything?

[atomic sagebrush]

I don't recommend shallow release after seeing tons of people not get pregnant while doing shallow release, even after I used every trick in my arsenal to help them conceive.

You can do a "hurry up FR" if you want to - have hubby release once, dump it, then DTD again as quick as you are able (hopefully within 1-3 hours) to using only the second batch for insemination. This will cut odds of conception by quite a bit, and there's no guaranteeing it even does anything. Plus many people have ended up missing the month when their husband could not attempt after the first release. Your call, but it's not my recommendation.

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you! I think I’ll just stick with regular :) along with the diet stuff. Thank you.

[DreamingofBoth]

I’m sorry for so many questions. I remember reading something about DH and his releases but can’t seem to find it. It’s better for him to just do whatever, but then only have one attempt during fertile window. Abstaining (less than 35yo) does it really do anything to help? For example if he does “his own thing” and then bd at opk pos then that’s okay? Even if he had done his own this two days before or whatever? Or we can bd with protection but still only one unprotected at opk positive? Even if it was two days before opk? Or is it better to abstain thanks.

[atomic sagebrush]

We believe the only thing that matters is the one attempt. So we have a lot of people who let their hubby "do what he does" and then have the one attempt and getting good results that way.

Many people do still want to try abstain which is fine, but I don't think it is helping (not to mention also makes hubbies super annoyed and then cuts odds of conception too)

[DreamingofBoth]

Well attempt number one is in the books. Due to conflicting schedules we did one attempt at what I think is probably a 3.5 days cut off. Which I understand makes it harder to get pregnant but we will see. For us, it was the least stressful time and that was good! :) We DTD Saturday night and I had my positive opk with FMU (which I know isn’t ideal and Could have been throughout the night on Tuesday-so I assume it was sometime during the night and then 24 hours after that would be ovulation). We did abstain for the 8 days prior due to colds that we both had. Prayers for a baby girl :) LE DIET as well. I have lost about 30+ pounds. I had a really long cycle that ended up being 70 days and I lost a lot of weight then so I think that is what caused it. Had a “normal cycle” and then tried this time. Whatever happens I’m grateful! And I feel so much better now! Being able to finally get rid of the weight and then some. Not eating as much meat as we once did. I just feel great! So thank you! :)

[atomic sagebrush]

FX and pink dust headed your way!

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you. I know it may be a long shot but we didn’t have any issues getting pregnant the first two times although there have been some changes. One thing for sure is my LP. for my sons i always ovulated around day 15 and had a 27 day cycle (give or take) so my concern is it it much shorter now. I know it’s prob because of my hormones which I also get it kinda the purpose but I hope it’s not too short. (It has been 7 days the past three cycles which I know is short) but maybe who knows lol. This time I ovulated (based on okp on day 21 one day later than last) and will prob have 28 cycle (with a 7 day LP). I guess there’s no way to help it now lol.

[atomic sagebrush]

We don't know that that is when you're ovulating though. Many times, people get a false positive OPK about a week before their period comes. This happens because there is a secondary estrogen surge at that point in the cycle, and it makes some O-type symptoms and a positive OPK for many people. I am pretty suspicious that if you're having a 28 day cycle and getting a pos OPK CD 21, the most likely thing is that you're missing your true positive and getting a false positive at the secondary estrogen surge. It is possible to have both delayed O and a short LP, but that that would then end up to be spot on 28 days - it's just not that common. Much more common to think you're ovulating later than you really are.

When are you checking with OPK?? Are you testing earlier in the cycle too?

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay. I’m curious. I’ve always been regular but now that I’ve changed things I thought maybe hormones. I’m also still nursing some and I know that can alter things but after my first I went right back to “normal”.
I started testing last cycle on day 12 typically right after lunch and got a positive on day 19.
This cycle started testing day 11. It wasn’t positive but it was a darker negative. No symptoms at that point. Kept testing and got a positive on cycle day 20 (fmu). That’s when my cervix changed as well. With lots of ewcm.
The cycle before that was the crazy one that needed up being about 77 days long. That one I started testing on day 9 but that was just weird. I lost most of my weight then.
I’m down to 125 (5‘3.5”)- Half to throw in the .5 :)

Maybe I’ll just get lucky with a BFP! Ha and then I won’t have to worry about it ;) one can only hope.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks!! yes, the nursing can change things and a short LP is more common with nursing.

Yes let's just wait and see what happens - FX for BFP!!

[DreamingofBoth]

Well just as suspected, AF started today :(. Peak was sept 22 fmu/assume 23 ovulation and then today AF Day 1. So I guess that’s 8 day LP.

[atomic sagebrush]

Let's have you hold steady on weight. I probably suggested this already but I want you eating a serving of full fat dairy daily, 4-6 eggs a week, and a serving of salmon if you like it, red meat if you don't every week. Drop fiber if using it.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay perfect. I’ve been trying to keep my weight the same. I don’t want To loose anymore. Also i can’t do eggs well. But I love salmon. We have been doing chicken and fish mostly. I just eat a small amount. I really feel like the fiber may be messing me up some so I will drop that. Thank you :)

[atomic sagebrush]

If you don't like eggs, have 2 servings of salmon a week and add in a few more servings of full fat dairy.

When TTC you should not have fish more than 2x a week, though.

[DreamingofBoth]

I like eggs, they just don’t settle with me that well :( okay perfect. I can do that. Thank you. Cycle day 5 so we will see what happens.

[DreamingofBoth]

Atomic. I just need some reassurance and verification lol.
So I’m going to start testing prob around cycle day 11-12 or so. Text after lunch once a day. As I get closer maybe twice (I haven’t been doing that) and then when I have the first positive opk, bd at that time (even if it’s that night after getting the opk pos around lunch). DH can abstain for 7-10 days and one unprotected attempt at opk pos. No need to do a cut off (I need to try to get that out of my head lol)

[atomic sagebrush]

I think you need to start before the earliest you can possibly O. So I'd start more like CD 10 or even more like CD 8 to be sure you start with a negative test for sure.

But other than that, that sounds great to me!

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay will do!! Do you think it’s possible to get a true positive on CD 11 with a 28 day cycle? With no other symptoms? I’ve never gotten a positive that early but it’s been a darker negative. Just curious.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes absolutely. We have people sometimes tkaing 72 hours after first positive when they're testing regularly. Within the wheelhouse for sure.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay good to know! But ah I hope not ha. That would definitely mess up my pervious tests and what I thought I knew ha. But I will see. We had a cut off last time Due to schedules and ovulating a little late, so I want to try to be able to be at that positive opk. Having him abstain still. And then trying not to use any lubricant. I think that also hindered things.

[atomic sagebrush]

Just because it happens this month, doesn't mean it happened in the past. You ahve all different times to ovulation after the first positive OPK. There's no set consistency from month to month.

Sounds great! Keep me posted!

[DreamingofBoth]

Do you recommend testing twice a day for OPK? In the afternoon and night? Or Is that not really necessary.

[atomic sagebrush]

For sure test with OPK after lunch (around 1 pm). If you want, you can add in another test prior to dinner (not at night but like 5ish) to guard against your pee being too diluted at lunchtime. But I'd only do that at times of month I felt it was likely to have a positive!

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you!! We DTD last night and I just knew it would be positive today and I had the kids so I didn’t think I would be able to get away. It was positive about 5:30. So “assuming” Ovulation is 24 hours away i guess it would be a two day cut off. One other protected BD about 6 days prior. (That was the only thing that worries me) but I’m good. Tomorrow “ovulation day” would have been my grandmothers 90th birthday and I have always loved the name Elizabeth so we shall see!

[atomic sagebrush]

protected BD doesn't matter. Good luck and pink dust headed your way!

[pinkpink24]

Hello Atomic, looking for some advice from you. This is my baby #2, trying to do a girl sway. Planning for TTC in three weeks and started doing the below :
1. Daily Cal and Mag supplements + 2 glasses of milk
2. Tested PH last cycle : 3 days before O = 4.5 - 5, 12 hours after O = 4 - 4.5. (Used PH testing strips). This makes me believe in TTC on O+12 rather than Shettles even though I believed in Shettles a lot earlier.
3. Planning to follow girl diet next three weeks but figure since my PH is kinda optimal, wondering if I follow it to a T.

4.What should I Douche with for O+12 ? This is my biggest concern. My PH is already optimal but what if its not in this cycle? How cna I decide )+12 vs Shettles? DH semen PH is > 7.
5. Anything else I should be following?

Any help would be appreciated!! Desperately trying for a girl this month, and even followed the chinese calendar that says I will have one this month.

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you!! Ah I’m hopeful. Feeling good. But of course we will see :). I kept testing. Idk if I should do that or not but I had a positive at CD 15 (5:30) and then I tested again and had another positive at CD 16 (2pm). In my Premom app it said cd 16 was peak. (The numbers were .2 off from each other). Today I tested again CD 17 (2pm) and stone cold negative which I knew it would be, but just for clarity. CD 16 night I didn’t test again but curious if it could have been going down then because of cramps that I was having like ovulation pains. Who knows! But we will see.
By dropping fiber (and who knows what else changed) I was four days earlier with ovulation so that’s good. My LP should be longer this time. So we will find out in the next two weeks or so. Thanks for your help and we will see what happens.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hello Atomic, looking for some advice from you. This is my baby #2, trying to do a girl sway. Planning for TTC in three weeks and started doing the below :
1. Daily Cal and Mag supplements + 2 glasses of milk
2. Tested PH last cycle : 3 days before O = 4.5 - 5, 12 hours after O = 4 - 4.5. (Used PH testing strips). This makes me believe in TTC on O+12 rather than Shettles even though I believed in Shettles a lot earlier.
3. Planning to follow girl diet next three weeks but figure since my PH is kinda optimal, wondering if I follow it to a T.

4.What should I Douche with for O+12 ? This is my biggest concern. My PH is already optimal but what if its not in this cycle? How cna I decide )+12 vs Shettles? DH semen PH is > 7.
5. Anything else I should be following?

Any help would be appreciated!! Desperately trying for a girl this month, and even followed the chinese calendar that says I will have one this month.

I will answer this in one of the other threads you posted.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you!! Ah I’m hopeful. Feeling good. But of course we will see :). I kept testing. Idk if I should do that or not but I had a positive at CD 15 (5:30) and then I tested again and had another positive at CD 16 (2pm). In my Premom app it said cd 16 was peak. (The numbers were .2 off from each other). Today I tested again CD 17 (2pm) and stone cold negative which I knew it would be, but just for clarity. CD 16 night I didn’t test again but curious if it could have been going down then because of cramps that I was having like ovulation pains. Who knows! But we will see.
By dropping fiber (and who knows what else changed) I was four days earlier with ovulation so that’s good. My LP should be longer this time. So we will find out in the next two weeks or so. Thanks for your help and we will see what happens.

The apps like Premom are not that helpful so please don't take it too seriously.

Great that you Oed sooner!! FXFXFX and keep me posted!

[DreamingofBoth]

Well I am out again this month. I know it takes a while for healthy couples so I’m sure swaying only adds to that. Spotting yesterday and my cervix is very low so I expect to see AF today. I had a couple of cheat days during the TWW, I was so sure it would happen this month. Felt good about it. But need to move on to the next try. What would you suggest trying this time? I’m wondering if we should do the same thing again? 1BD at OPK POS. This would be month three trying But the first month ended up being more of a cutoff Due to schedules and ovulating late. ( I got preg the third month with my first; first time with my second). November is also the month that I’ve gotten pregnant with both boys lol. (Both August babies). Also we did have a protected bd about 6 days prior and then the one attempt and then waited a few days and then protected again. So only one Unprotected bd the whole cycle. No lube this past time. I laid down afterward for a little bit. Didn’t get up immediately. So I guess maybe We should do the same thing? Thanks.

[atomic sagebrush]

It's your call to make if you want to continue with one attempt or go to e4d. Totally up to you and depends on your priority about what you want to do. If you're ready to boost odds of conception we can do that, if you want to give it another month on one attempt that's totally fine too. All about the timeline that you feel comfy with.

[DreamingofBoth]

Well i would definitely like to boost the odds of conception, but I guess at the same time it makes me a little nervous. I get the best chance of a girl it to actually get pregnant lol. Ugh I was so hoping it would happen this month! Lol. I was so sure. Anyway. So every 4 days, is every four days from the end of AF. This is probably a stupid question, but for example Let’s just say it ends on Sunday. So start Monday, Friday, Tuesday, Saturday, Wednesday.. and so on through ovulation? And the “big o” question, I guess it doesn’t matter? I haven’t had one during the one attempt at pos opk, but I guess we don’t know of that really sways or not.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, start attempt the day after AF ends (or sooner if that's your preference, there's no magic to that part of it just whenever you want to start, as long as you're in with a couple attempts prior to the fertile window)

You can do the e4d in the "every 72 hour" (better odds of conception) or "every 96 hour" (possibly better chance of pink) pattern. So Mon/Thurs or Mon/Fri depending on your preference. (if you can't decide, don't agonize over it, just flip a coin and do what the coin tells you to do)

Then continue on with that even after you think you ovulated. We are trying to guard against both early and late O by doing this technique and stopping too soon is the #1 thing people do wrong. They assume O happened, stop having sex, and end up missing the entire month!

The truth is we don't know about the Big O. Many of us, myself included, had one when we got our girls. Theoretically it's supposed to sway blue but it's far from proven. I have a funny, very much NSFW thread on it here: https://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/27912-o-no-orgasms-swaying.html#post378932

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you! It’s definitely nerve racking. I didn’t think it would take long and then the stress of that doesn’t help lol. And now the pressure is on for an August baby lol. So I have to suppress that. I want to get pregnant but I also want that possibility for a swat as well. What about positive opk and then four days after that as well? I know you said e4d is getting the early and late ovulation, it just worries me with the closeness of the two on the fertile window.

[atomic sagebrush]

positive OPK and then every 4 days after that may not help boost your chances of conception, though. One of the positives of the e4d is that it introduces an element of chance that attempting at positive OPK does not. What if DTD at positive OPK, even though statistically it's been a good chance of conception, is NOT a good chance for you personally (or at the least, isn't this month?) People could go on and on having sex on a bad day for them to conceive! Some people don't O till as long as 72 hours after that first pos OPK. So by randomizing somewhat when that attempt falls with the e4d, not only are we guarding against the early and late O, we're also guarding against the notion that positive OPK may not be the best time for some people to conceive.

Plus, even with the "every 72" let alone the 96 hour pattern, it is NOT close together in the fertile window. Earlier in the cycle you're much less fertile, and sperm simply do not survive very long. So if a person had O-5, O-2, and O+1 attempts, that is still just one attempt in the fertile window because the O-5 is too early and the O+1 is too late. If a person had O-4, O-1, and O+2 attempts, only the O-1 is viable. Even in the worst case scenario of O-3 and O Day, it is STILL one attempt because if anything from the O-3 was left, it would already have fertilized the egg before the O Day shot could capacitate and make it to the egg. And if there wasn't, then the O Day attempt would have a chance.

It's totally your call to make, if you want to start off with pos OPK then go to every 4 after that, it's fine, I just want you to understand how it actually works before you make a decision. :)

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay that makes perfect sense! Thank you very much for explaining that to me so that could understand. Thank you!! I think i will go with that. I do get that it can take healthy couples many months to conceive but I didn’t think that would be a prob seeing as we already have two without too much trouble. But I would like to increase the chance of conception. I am still much smaller than I was when I got pregnant with my second and a little smaller than with the first. I think that will help some with the stress to. I guess my concern is that my second was conceived with two BDs that were 72 hours apart. Although I wasn’t doing the diet like I should have and I was at my heaviest since I didn’t lose all my baby weight (and supplements). And I also get nothing is 100%. I assume you see pretty good success with every four days (72hours) And nothing else besides the LE diet.

[atomic sagebrush]

The e4d is newer and so has a smaller sample size, but as it is right now it actually has somewhat better results (this will likely go down over time as more people start using the method, including people who aren't doing anything else to sway...there are lots of things that factor into our success rates so it's not always as cut and dry as just comparing them). The one attempt has a much larger sample size, but that includes a lot of people who did nothing else to sway (not even diet) and so I think the results are skewed to be lower than they "should" be.

Long story short I have more faith with one attempt but think that in the long run they're both going to work.

[DreamingofBoth]

Ugh so nerve racking. One side of me just wants to be like ugh whatever, ha I want another baby no matter what of course as long as it’s healthy. Ive done so much to “help” and then the other part of me is saying that I need to do everything I can. Which I know that doesn’t help either.
Then I think my first attempt was a long shot with a long cut off because schedules and late ovulation. Then my second attempt I guess ended with I assume was a three day cut off Idk. I had two days of positive tests (bd day before first pos) So then I think, Maybe try one month right at opk pos since I haven’t truly done it on that exact day yet. But then I’m ready for another little one. Lol.

And other thoughts.
So what are you thoughts on abstaining. That could make it hard to conceive right? so we can dtd with protection and still have the one attempt at OPK POS. Would that help boosts odds? Still diet (keeping Weight Stable) and No lubes. No jump and dump.

I’m sorry :/

[atomic sagebrush]

The more you debate about it internally the more wound up and "control freaky" you feel about it. I would just pick something, even if you have to flip a coin to do it, and go with it. The endless obsessing over things that probably don't even make any difference is not beneficial.

Abstain doesn't work and cuts odds of conception by a lot. Dropping abstain but still having one UNprotected attempt this month is def. another option.

[DreamingofBoth]

I assume you mean one unprotected:) but yes you are right. I have issues. Lol. I feel as though I’ve done somewhat of a cutoff the past two months so I need to go closer to peak and possible ovulation. We will see what happens. Will not abstain or anything else that may cut odds. Thank you for your help. Here’s to this month :)

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, I did LOL. Sorry. Good luck and pink dust headed your way!

[DreamingofBoth]

Probably a stupid question but just to verify, Protected BDs at any point of the cycle, are they okay? It’s just the one attempt that’s unprotected at opk positive that matters. Is that right lol? And the big o doesn’t really seem to matter on those protected times?

[atomic sagebrush]

yes!!!

The Big O thing probably doesn't matter at all anyway. Some people seem to think avoiding them all the time helps, but we have done tons of polls and posts about them and no strong trend really jumps out at me. The couples with more boys are more sexual overall but that does not equate to female O swaying blue. Plus, it helps keep you and hubby happy to continue that. I would not worry about it at all. I had one when I got my girl!

[DreamingofBoth]

Haha thank you. And just for more verification, position does not matter either correct LOL I know what you are going to say. But I just want to verify LOL.

My husband just found out that he has to have surgery next Friday the 13th so we are praying that everything goes OK. Of course the stress of that does not help LOL. Although I’m hoping to ovulate next Friday and maybe have peak on Thursday At the latest for our one attempt but I guess we’ll have to wait and see. Hopefully it’ll take this time since he might be down for a little bit.

[atomic sagebrush]

yep, doesn't matter. We've had people do all sorts of positions for girls and for boys and they don't seem to sway by much at all.

[DreamingofBoth]

So I’m expecting to get my opk positive tomorrow around 1ish when I typically test based on pervious months and how my tests are today. Is it okay to wait to dtd tomorrow night?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes it's fine to wait till the night after the pos OPK!

[DreamingofBoth]

Well out again this month..... I know it can take time, but at the same time I didn’t think it would take long to get pregnant. It definitely gets frustrating month after month. So I guess the next step would be to do every four days? Monday/Thursday type of deal (depending on when AF ends).

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes. After your period ends have unprotected sex every 72 hours (not to the specific hour but tha'ts how I want you to count the days). Keep going with this till you're sure you've ovulated even if it means going all the way thru till your next period begins.

How long are you laying down after intercourse?

Are you doing female O?

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thanks.

I’m laying down for a good 10 mins.

No female O. I’m wondering if I should though. For my second I did a kind of every four days and I did not one time and then three days later. (It was a little closer than 72 hours) but i think I had already ovulated by that time.

[atomic sagebrush]

Ok. Be sure to spend at least part of that 10 minutes on your tummy not just your back and we may want to extend that over the course of time.

Yes let's go ahead and add in female O. It can help boost chances of conception and we have no evidence that it affects a sway in any way. We start off without female O just for the sake of the "old school" sway tactics but truly, there's no data that shows it sways at all. We've done tons of polls and threads on this issue and while there's a trend that couples with all boys are on average more sexual than those with all girls, there are plenty of pink mamas who have Big O all the time and some blue mamas who don't.

[DreamingofBoth]

Okay thank you. Ugh this is so frustrating! Lol. Thank you for your help.

[DreamingofBoth]

So I just got a faint positive. I’ve never got one like this after so many negatives. And so faint. Currently Cycle day 31. Peak opk on day 15.

[atomic sagebrush]

We have had a rash of false positives on pregnancy tests this last few months - they're very light, but positive, and then hang around several days but never get any darker. And some of the people getting them even had blood tests that were negative. So keeping fingers crossed but do be aware we've had several cases of false positives of late.

[DreamingofBoth]

Good to know. It was very weird. I’ve never had one this late. I retested because I was about four days late. Idk. Just odd. I’m definitely hesitant to be too excited for sure. My first thought was actually the possibility of miscarriage but idk. it’s getting a little darker, But still faint but there. I want to test with another in a few days.
Do you know what brands you have seen with that?

I will try to add a picture.

[DreamingofBoth]

43013

This was done today.

[atomic sagebrush]

Do you think you could have ovulated later than you thought?

That definitely looks positive and is darker already than the ones that I've seen that happen with (which were a variety of brands but none of them Medlines). FXFXFX!

[DreamingofBoth]

So what happen was :) lol. So opk positive on Thursday the 12th which was cycle day 15 and then my husband had surgery on Friday, so he was essentially out of commission for almost two weeks. Friday cycle day 16 was “ovulation“ if I ovulated 24 hours after which I don’t think I did. I did have cramps on the cycle day 15 but my cervix was still pretty high on the Cycle day 16. On cycle day 17 my cervix was still a little open but starting to close and then cycle day 18 it was closed. I know you can’t really go by cramps and everything so I guess technically I don’t really know exactly when I did ovulate other than the 18th it was definitely closed and positive opk on Cycle day 15. So I dk. Lol.

Thank you!! I took one yesterday morning and it was definitely lighter than this one but this one I took this afternoon just right before I sent it. Makes me feel better that they are getting darker. I’m four weeks so I may check again at 5 weeks (Thursday) to see what it looks like.

Thank you!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Keep us posted!

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you. Will do! And thank you for all of your help.

[DreamingofBoth]

Well I’m almost 6 weeks with the tests that were getting darker. First apt next week and then ultrasound won’t be until sometime between 8-10 weeks. :)

[atomic sagebrush]

GREAT! :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

[DreamingofBoth]

Well I am officially 8 weeks 5 days per LMP. Ultrasound measuring 5 days less at 7 weeks 6 days. Everything looks good! I guess that explains the faint test lines. Must have conceived a little later. One BD at OPK Pos. Nothing else for two weeks since my husband had surgery. Due date aug 11! Makes three aug babies :)

[atomic sagebrush]

AMAZING! Huge congrats!

[DreamingofBoth]

Thank you very much!! Will keep posted!! 10 weeks now and I assume everything is going well.

Have you seen many people measuring small on first ultrasound? Is that pretty normal? I never had that with my first two.

One BD at OPK pos (cd 15).

[atomic sagebrush]

How small is small? Baby or belly?

[DreamingofBoth]

Baby. Measuring 6 days behind. I know that it’s early just didn’t know. With my boys they went with due date by LMP. And now they changed it this time because baby is measuring 6 days smaller meaning conception would have taken place later I guess that thought.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes it's because you ovulated later than you think, I suspect.

Small variations are completely to be expected as well, so let's assume you were 3 days off on O and then they made measurement errors of 3 days and that's just what we'd expect to see. :)

[DreamingofBoth]

We got our girl!!!! Thank you so much!!!