Back and considering ttc for a fifth

[Jconger]

Hello all!!! I was here right before I conceived my DD3. Im back after a few years. Here’s my story. Would love any feedback!

Had DD1 without trying on the first month.

We had a miscarriage.

DD2 heard of the shettles method and tried, but couldn’t really work it. Focused on eating more salty like foods and more foods in general. Conceived after hubby got back from several trips for residency interviews.

DD3 I tried a few things including shettles, but again was just not conceiving so stopped that. Conceived after trying for several months. Found this group right before conceiving. I tried some of the tips here before conceiving, but it was only for a month (and now I don’t remember any of them lol).


Dd4 was a complete surprise. Our oops! We thought we were done with 3. She is the best surprise EVER!!


Well, I still have a desire for a son. I’ve longed for a boy since we decided to have babies. I absolutely love and adore my girls of course! Would never trade one in. Whenever I hear of someone having a son though I always feel a bit sad. Am I missing out on something?!

Five sounds INSANE but so did four. Lol I am a personal trainer on the smaller size. I vary between 110-112lbs. I eat small meals often.

Can someone lead me in the right direction for food, exercise, timing, etc? I’m interested in anything that might help if we decide for a fifth. Like I said, I’m not sold on the idea of 5 but my heart still feels like a boy is missing in our family. I feel like he exists. Am I crazy?! Lol

Where I am at right now. Our 4th is 11 months and I am still nursing. I’ve focused on putting on some muscle mass and have already gained 3 lbs in the last 3 months. I am very lean and would like to stay lean just increase my muscle if possible. Lifting 3x p week and cycling (focusing on legs vs heart rate) 2x p week. What else should I focus on right now? How long after nursing should we wait to try? Etc.

Also, is there anyone here with four of the same gender and conceived the opposite? Thanks in advance.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[4blue2pink]

Hi Jconger I remember you from when you had your DD3 :) Congratulations on your DD4!! :heart: I had the same pattern as you just with gender reversed.
DS1
miscarriage (this baby was a girl)
DS2
DS3
DS4
Then after believing we would never have a girl we had 2 girls in a row so you 100% can get the opposite gender after 4 of the same :)

5 isnt much different from 4 to be honest, baby will just slot right in :) You've already maxed out a 5 seat car with 4 kids 2 adults so 4-5 is less of a change than 3-4 kids as thats the one where you've got to up-size the car.
Good luck with ttc if you do decide to go ahead and sending you all my blue dust.

[atomic sagebrush]

If I remember right you actually had a pretty good sway working for DD3 and then we found out after the fact you were still exercising a lot and using the herbal shakes, right?? (you posted about this in a thread I happen to read through a lot, I promise I'm not cyberstalking you LOL)

The absolute BEST thing you can do is add that muscle. That is GREAT!

Tell me about what an average day of eating looks liek for you. I would say protein and carbs at every meal and snack, as much healthy/saturated fat as you can get without gaining body fat.

When did you stop nursing?? And how close postpartum are you?

Yes I have 4 boys and got my girl, but we have had several people get boys after 4 and even 5 girls as well.

[Jconger]

Thank you!! Ahh I remember you as well!!

Thanks atomic! Yes, I am eating something very close to this...
Breakfast within the hour Of waking usually

English muffin + PB + blueberries and 2 eggs

Plant based (with stevia sweetener) meal replacement 24g protein + 24 g carbs

Lunch either a salad with brown rice, a sandwich with multi grain bread and turkey, leftovers

Pistachios with banana or (high protein) yogurt with
Granola or oatmeal with pb and protein powder (this is made with a sucralose sweetener)

Dinner always a protein and carb with veggies

Before bed apple and cookie butter or angie’s popcorn lol making sure i didn’t miss any calories plus a protein shake

I am still using supplements. I take a BCAA, probiotic, 1000 mg omegas, multi with iron and still doing the Spark (vitamin drink with caffeine and sweetened with sucralose). I only do one of those a day.

I’m still nursing the babe. She is 11 months. No period yet.

What should i change or add? And how many months of that before ttc?

I’ve already put on 3lbs in the month but i feel like my acid reflux is acting up since eating more. I hadn’t had this issue in a long.

Anyway... thoughts?? Thank you so much!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[YesIcan2020]

4 daughters how amazing, I say definitely go again why not!

I have 2 sons and after reading lots on this awesome site I believe the main reason I had my two boys was the amount of calories I was eating. I am also very lean but had a large food intake with lots of sugar, salt and meat. I was always snacking and took quite a lot of vitamins. I’m trying for a girl now and have cut my food intake in half!

I hope that helps, sending you all my blue dust if I have any left! All the best, I really hope you get your son xx

[Jconger]

4 daughters how amazing, I say definitely go again why not!

I have 2 sons and after reading lots on this awesome site I believe the main reason I had my two boys was the amount of calories I was eating. I am also very lean but had a large food intake with lots of sugar, salt and meat. I was always snacking and took quite a lot of vitamins. I’m trying for a girl now and have cut my food intake in half!

I hope that helps, sending you all my blue dust if I have any left! All the best, I really hope you get your son xx

Thank you so much for your feedback. I am thinking calories could have something to do with it.
I’m looking forward to hearing more on what atomic thinks. Good luck to you with a girl as well. And yes!! I am so blessed!!!!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I am so sorry I thought I'd answered this but maybe I didn't???

how many grams of protein and fat total?

What all is in the protein and Spark shakes? I have this recollection of there being inositol in one of them, was that right?

I feel like 1000 mg Omegas is too much. when you say Omegas, what kind are they specifically?

I think you'll just have to wait till your cycle resumes, so however long on diet till that happens!

[Jconger]

I’m honestly not measuring my fat and protein. I am just focusing on a protein every meal and eating about 5-6 meals a day. Every meal has between 15-25g protein. I do a half of an avocado to an entire one once a day. Then nuts and Pb. The omegas I take are 600mg eicosapentaenoic and 400mf docosahexaeonic so total of 1000mg.

There’s no herbs in the meal replacement shakes or spark (vitamin drink with caffeine). What specifics do you need to know?

Also, no timing in waiting after nursing? I thought there was some sort of recommendation in waiting in the past?

Has anything changed with timing of intercourse around ovulation or frequency?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

I am so sorry I thought I'd answered this but maybe I didn't???

how many grams of protein and fat total?

What all is in the protein and Spark shakes? I have this recollection of there being inositol in one of them, was that right?

I feel like 1000 mg Omegas is too much. when you say Omegas, what kind are they specifically?

I think you'll just have to wait till your cycle resumes, so however long on diet till that happens!

Oh and that was it about the shakes and spark. No inositol. I’m not even sure what that is lol. [emoji2372][emoji1787]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I would take the Omegas every other day. We've been seeing better results with only 500 mg daily vs. 1000.

I would like you to be getting more animal fat like butter. You're getting a LOT of vegetable fat, and we want more animal/saturated fat to be coming in than vegetable if at all possible.

Inositol isn't an herb, it's a nutrient. I'd just like to see the nutrient profiles of what is in those shakes.

I prefer you guys wait till 18 months postpartum. I'm fine if you keep nursing though (I've seen too many people wean before they wanted to only to get an opposite anyway) But I understand you may want to try sooner than that.

I still like you guys to be having regular unprotected sex every 2-4 days outside of the fertile window and then 3-5 attempts IN the fertile window. But if you still want to keep timing, you'd have hubby do the release every 2-4 days, and then go for the attempt the night of positive OPK, again that next morning (O Day) and again that following night (O Day) Then have one more attempt the following day (O+1) just to be on the safe side and then go to every other day a couple rounds. That way i you end up with a delayed ovulation you're still covered.

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh and that was it about the shakes and spark. No inositol. I’m not even sure what that is lol. [emoji2372][emoji1787]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

It's a vitamin-like nutrient that seems very effective at lowering blood sugar and has swayed strongly pink. They're putting it in a lot of things lately so I just wanted to be sure what was in the shakes.

[Jconger]

I would take the Omegas every other day. We've been seeing better results with only 500 mg daily vs. 1000.

I would like you to be getting more animal fat like butter. You're getting a LOT of vegetable fat, and we want more animal/saturated fat to be coming in than vegetable if at all possible.

Inositol isn't an herb, it's a nutrient. I'd just like to see the nutrient profiles of what is in those shakes.

I prefer you guys wait till 18 months postpartum. I'm fine if you keep nursing though (I've seen too many people wean before they wanted to only to get an opposite anyway) But I understand you may want to try sooner than that.

I still like you guys to be having regular unprotected sex every 2-4 days outside of the fertile window and then 3-5 attempts IN the fertile window. But if you still want to keep timing, you'd have hubby do the release every 2-4 days, and then go for the attempt the night of positive OPK, again that next morning (O Day) and again that following night (O Day) Then have one more attempt the following day (O+1) just to be on the safe side and then go to every other day a couple rounds. That way i you end up with a delayed ovulation you're still covered.

Ok great. Thank you! I’m just taking a serving of the omegas. That is one serving. Does that really seem like too much? Like it sways girl?
It looks like my green shakes have that nutrient. None of my other products though [emoji2372] I thought sucralose was what you were concerned of swaying pink? Is that still the case? My sucralose products do not have that nutrient but my plant based shake does. Weird, I don’t know.

Concerning animal and saturated fats. My stomach does not do well with those things. I am eating red meat twice a week now (preciously did not eat any). I can’t do a high, rich in fat diet though. Is this a big deal? Or does just putting on muscle and eating more help??

And great to know on timing. I’m waiting for a cycle before we do any attempts lol. We are just doing the pull out method right now [emoji2957][emoji28]

Thank you! Appreciate all of these tips. What about exercise? Does that sound ok??


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Let me explain the deal with the higher level Omegas. Firstly there's a safety concern in that women are more prone to getting bleeding issues from blood thinners than men are. So a dose that may be commonly sold (because it was tested in men, for example) for many women, will cause bleeding, bruising, heavy periods, and then if you're taking it while you're pregnant or when TTC, can contribute to subchorionic hemorrhage and possibly mess with implantation (just like when it's hard for a baby to implant when the blood is too thick, it's also likely not good if the blood is too thin when the bean is burrowing in.) So too much Omega 3 is not good for you anyway, and may even contribute to chemical pregnancy or later losses.

Then, because higher dose Omega 3 can lower cholesterol, too much Omega 3 may also lower cholesterol which makes it harder for your body to make testosterone and estrogen (both of which sway blue.) So for those two reasons, I have lowered the dose to 500 mg or 1000 every other day for the Omega 3. now, you can certainly continue if you want, but that's my thinking on telling you to take less.

Sucralose may sway pink and many people would avoid it when swaying, but I am more concerned by other potential ingredients (such as the inositol, some essential fatty acids like Omega 6 and 9, flaxseed, high doses of B vitamins, and other ingredients. Some of those things may sway pink.) The sucralose has not been terribly effective but I do still have people avoid it. My larger concern is that I can't see the nutrient profile of these drinks and I can't sign off on them unless I do.

Putting on muscle and eating more will help. It's just that we have some animal studies indicating more vegetable fats than animal fats may = more daughters conceived. Can you tolerate coconut oil?

I'll go back and reread the exercise to be sure.

[atomic sagebrush]

No your exercise is looking great, and I see you'd explained about the nursing in your post - sorry that was a crazy day for me! Anyway I answered that further along in the thread, sorry for the confusion.

[Jconger]

Ok great! Thank you so much for your help. Let me know if this answers what you need for the spark and shakes. Is there a certain amount that is ok with sucralose and the inosital? That is like tolerable or just avoid it all together? That is going to be a bit of a challenge lol.

Coconut oil really makes me feel sick. I can’t do that either. It’s really fat in general that messes with my gut. A probiotic helps a ton and I’m trying to do nuts and PB and just try to do with other foods. Boo, maybe it’ll be tough for me to sway? Is red near twice a week helpful?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200917/a0e6c7a38a76732b8f8c8dfff9528419.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200917/670a8e1f71e77269be707950cd96c4e7.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200917/6a5cb215f266c5818c097022d1c8b1a0.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20200917/1216699155ae6ef4b60cab6002102321.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

And you are right, there is that ingredient in the Spark as well. It says 10 mg. I had missed it earlier.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

The lowest dose I use for pink sways is 500 mg of inositol, so if you stay below that it may be ok.

Sucralose, I'm not sure it even sways pink or does anything but most people choose to avoid it. As long as you keep it as minimal as you can, I think that's what counts.

You can still sway, though. I'm just trying to optimize things here. It doesn't mean you can't get a boy if you don't do these things, just that I want you to have your absolutely best shot. Red meat 2x a week would be great!

probiotics have swayed blue so please continue with that.

[atomic sagebrush]

And you are right, there is that ingredient in the Spark as well. It says 10 mg. I had missed it earlier.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I can live with 10 mg but there are some other issues. See those massive doses of B vitamins?? Those can mess with your cycle and I just don't trust them. I don't trust them for pink, I don't trust them for blue, I don't trust them for anyone. And the Vit. C is not only enough to be said to sway pink, but may even be enough to contribute to losses (some people use 1000 mg Vit. C to try and induce miscarriage in unwanted pregnancy.)

The other ones are ok, though one has flaxseed and there's inulin, which is a type of fiber (fiber may sway pink) But on the whole, aside from the top one and the one with flaxseed, those are ok by me.

[Jconger]

I can live with 10 mg but there are some other issues. See those massive doses of B vitamins?? Those can mess with your cycle and I just don't trust them. I don't trust them for pink, I don't trust them for blue, I don't trust them for anyone. And the Vit. C is not only enough to be said to sway pink, but may even be enough to contribute to losses (some people use 1000 mg Vit. C to try and induce miscarriage in unwanted pregnancy.)

The other ones are ok, though one has flaxseed and there's inulin, which is a type of fiber (fiber may sway pink) But on the whole, aside from the top one and the one with flaxseed, those are ok by me.

Ok great! What about doing a half a Spark per day? Then it would be half of all of the vitamins you are concerned about? How much probiotic is recommended? The green shakes have probiotic in them as well, but I think those have the flaxseed you are mentioning. Is there a limit on fiber? I have a high fiber diet usually to prevent stomach issues. Also, is there anything about avoiding dairy? I thought I had read in the past that swayed pink. Along with more greens and higher sodium for blue? Just wondering if there are particular foods I should consume more of or less of. I am seeing the scale increase so that’s really encouraging! I’m not sure how much weight you think would be good to put on before trying. Thanks again for all of your help!!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Even at a half a dose that's still quite high in terms of the B Vitamins. it's your call, and if you don't see any changes in your cycle it may be something you feel comfortable with including, but it's just not something I recommend.

Fiber may sway pink, but as long as it's part of your diet and not in supplement form that's ok with me. Real foods are great for blue, even if they have fiber. Things like psyllium husk, I would avoid for now.

Avoiding dairy does not sway blue. That idea has been investigated by myself and others and it is not true (many of us on here, myself included, have opposites with the mineral diets). I would suggest you have full fat dairy only (no skim dairy, skim dairy MAY sway pink for some people by messing with your blood sugar in certain ways that aren't beneficial for blue) More greens are great but I'd not rely on them alone (also be increasing nutrients across the boards, particularly protein and animal fat)

Higher sodium, just like with the dairy intake, has not panned out. Just have sodium to taste, and avoid those ridiculous sky high sodium intakes like the types of diets that consist of ham for breakfast, Top Ramen for lunch, and hot dogs for dinner kind of thing.

I would have you gain up to 10-15 lbs. No more than that, and you can likely get by with more like 3-5 lbs if that feels better to you.

[Jconger]

Even at a half a dose that's still quite high in terms of the B Vitamins. it's your call, and if you don't see any changes in your cycle it may be something you feel comfortable with including, but it's just not something I recommend.

Fiber may sway pink, but as long as it's part of your diet and not in supplement form that's ok with me. Real foods are great for blue, even if they have fiber. Things like psyllium husk, I would avoid for now.

Avoiding dairy does not sway blue. That idea has been investigated by myself and others and it is not true (many of us on here, myself included, have opposites with the mineral diets). I would suggest you have full fat dairy only (no skim dairy, skim dairy MAY sway pink for some people by messing with your blood sugar in certain ways that aren't beneficial for blue) More greens are great but I'd not rely on them alone (also be increasing nutrients across the boards, particularly protein and animal fat)

Higher sodium, just like with the dairy intake, has not panned out. Just have sodium to taste, and avoid those ridiculous sky high sodium intakes like the types of diets that consist of ham for breakfast, Top Ramen for lunch, and hot dogs for dinner kind of thing.

I would have you gain up to 10-15 lbs. No more than that, and you can likely get by with more like 3-5 lbs if that feels better to you.

Awesome! Thank you so much for all of this feedback! Is there any links you’d recommend me read so I’m not asking you so many questions? I tried looking but there is so much on here I can’t remember where to look.

In terms of high B Vitamins... when you say messing with your cycle, does this mean it’s just not regular? Or it’s shorter or longer than should be? In the past, I noticed the trend of ovulating between day 19-23. Then AF coming around day 33. Other than that, I’ve never had issues. I’ve had Spark with the last 3 pregnancies.

Thank you again for all of your help and knowledge.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

No I'm happy to answer as many questions as you have. If you do want to do some reading, in my signature there's the link to the Complete Index where you'll find probably more than you ever wanted to know about swaying, LOL

The B Vitamins change people's cycles in all sorts of ways. People who have always had regular cycles suddenly develop irregular ones. People who always ovulate on a certain day suddenly find their ovulation delayed. Others develop short LP. Sometimes people's cycles stay exactly the same length, but their ovulation is delayed and their LP gets short so they don't even realize they're having issues with it. It's your call to make if you continue, I just can't sign off on it, that's all.

[Jconger]

No I'm happy to answer as many questions as you have. If you do want to do some reading, in my signature there's the link to the Complete Index where you'll find probably more than you ever wanted to know about swaying, LOL

The B Vitamins change people's cycles in all sorts of ways. People who have always had regular cycles suddenly develop irregular ones. People who always ovulate on a certain day suddenly find their ovulation delayed. Others develop short LP. Sometimes people's cycles stay exactly the same length, but their ovulation is delayed and their LP gets short so they don't even realize they're having issues with it. It's your call to make if you continue, I just can't sign off on it, that's all.

Ok good to know!! So it doesn’t sway some people just have issues with it? I’ll go to your signature and see if I can find the list of things to avoid to sway blue. I’ll keep you posted about about what we decide to do about trying again!! Thank you again


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

What we believe sways is a lowered overall fertility where you're still able to conceive, but it's just a little harder (and this is not always or even usually visible, which is why people can get pregnant with girls on accident and with only a month or two of trying). So if your cycle is messed up, that might indicate to us that your fertility IS reduced (since diet, exercising too much, breastfeeding, and some of the herbal supplements cause that same problem and they sway pink) in that way that sways pink. Thus I feel that the B vitamins are too risky for people to take. But since you're not seeing that disruption, even though my preference is for you to stop using the stuff, I don't feel it's as critically important for you as it is for someone who is seeing those disruptions, if that makes sense.

[Jconger]

What we believe sways is a lowered overall fertility where you're still able to conceive, but it's just a little harder (and this is not always or even usually visible, which is why people can get pregnant with girls on accident and with only a month or two of trying). So if your cycle is messed up, that might indicate to us that your fertility IS reduced (since diet, exercising too much, breastfeeding, and some of the herbal supplements cause that same problem and they sway pink) in that way that sways pink. Thus I feel that the B vitamins are too risky for people to take. But since you're not seeing that disruption, even though my preference is for you to stop using the stuff, I don't feel it's as critically important for you as it is for someone who is seeing those disruptions, if that makes sense.

Ok Thank you! I honestly have always ovulated later like between day 19-21. I’ve always been on the leaner side... do you think that could contribute to ovulating later? Is that an issue? Like that could sway pink? Is there anything on hubby’s side to be cautious of with swaying as well?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

If you're ovulating late because you don't have enough body fat to rely on to help make estrogen then yes, that could potentially sway pink, but the good news is that's why we do the diet!

We've found that men who are heavyset seem to have more girls, and smoking and jogging/biking have been shown in studies to sway pink.

[Jconger]

If you're ovulating late because you don't have enough body fat to rely on to help make estrogen then yes, that could potentially sway pink, but the good news is that's why we do the diet!

We've found that men who are heavyset seem to have more girls, and smoking and jogging/biking have been shown in studies to sway pink.

Ok well I officially started my cycle so we will see if adding muscle and this diet helps shorten it!

Regarding hubby he is not heavyset by any means. He doesn’t smoke. He plays soccer though so there is jogging/sprinting involved there... anything else he can do? He plays video games on a laptop? Lol


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

If possible, have him sleep in the nude or in really loose fitting pajama pants rather than underwear.

I would also have him take a cool (not cold) shower immediately after practicing soccer or working out (if he can't take one immediately after, then just have him skip it, as a few hours after he'll be cooled down anyway.) Don't have him ice his balls or anything like that, just if he can take a cool but still comfortable shower right after getting heated up it may help.

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you! He is only playing once or twice a week these days with covid. Does he need to do this every night or just when he plays?

Also, wondering thoughts on where I’m at right now before swaying... if we do.

I’m doing 1/3 or 1/2 of a Spark every day or every other day (as needed/desire). Not doing the meal replacement shakes and only doing the protein shakes that do not have that nutrient. Have gained around 6-7lbs and trying for another 5lbs. Had my first cycle so trying to track it this next month. Lifting 3x p week hard for gaining muscle. Thinking of incorporating one more lift day in place of a bike day. Not really avoiding any types of food. Focusing on increasing red meat at least twice a week. Also eating just higher caloric foods with some sweets to help increase the weight easier. Still eating mostly healthy though. Omegas every other day and multi every day.

How does this all sound?? Anything I need to tweak? Could I do coffee ok in place of Spark? Or Green tea? I like a hot drink in the fall. Also, what is the case when/if we do decide to start trying or having unprotected sex? Should I do an ovulation kit? Thanks for the feedback!!! I greatly appreciate it!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Oh and one more thing, my husband is a gamer. Is there any issue with him having a laptop ? Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

If he can do it all the time, that's great! If he'll only do it on nights he plays, it's ok too.

Everything is looking great to me!! Green tea is a great option for blue. I'd keep coffee minimal as that's swayed pink for us.

yes if you're willing to do OPK, that's been our most reliable way to pinpoint the fertile window. Did you want to do timing or not?

[Jconger]

If he can do it all the time, that's great! If he'll only do it on nights he plays, it's ok too.

Everything is looking great to me!! Green tea is a great option for blue. I'd keep coffee minimal as that's swayed pink for us.

yes if you're willing to do OPK, that's been our most reliable way to pinpoint the fertile window. Did you want to do timing or not?

Ok so go with the tea and it’s ok to do dairy? I forgot to add my daily probiotics as well! Is there anything about him using a laptop? He said it doesn’t heat him up but I dunno... we have four girls Lol snd I’ve heard something about that. No need to avoid any types of foods? And yes on timing. That is one thing we never really did... waiting that 24 hours after a positive opk... i know there was something about lots of sex earlier in the month and then after opk lots? Just wanting to make sure I have everything lined up correctly if we decide to! Thank you again so much for all your help!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Also, what was the link you were recommending me to reading up on for a boy sway diet, etc. i saw the LE diet in your profile, but I think that’s for swaying for a girl? I didn’t see anything about swaying boy but maybe I wasn’t looking in the didn’t place. Thank you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

:agree: yes, tea both green and black and full fat dairy only (no skim dairy) is great for blue.

Probiotics are great for both of you.

I prefer you guys not put the laptop in the crotch, the claims made on other sites about "ions" are nonsense and the heat of the laptop may sway pink by "cooking" the testicles and lowering sperm count that way. Can he set it on a pillow instead?

PLEASE please please do not wait 24 hours after a positive OPK for pink. That insures you have only one attempt in the fertile window, and timing does not work at all. We have a way that will ensure you have 3 attempts while still keeping in line with Shettles:

Have hubby doing regular release every 2-4 days all thru the entire cycle (and as far in advance as possible) and then have one attempt the night of first positive OPK, again the next morning AND the next night (so 2x in one day that second day, if you can), then the following day in case of delayed ovulation. Then if you can, do every other day for a couple days and have hubby resume regular release after that.

That is still within the parameters of Shettles but has the 3 attempts we have found effective for blue. Best of both worlds!

HE Diet is here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-boy/16806-high-everything-diet-nutshell-version.html

HE FAQ is here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-boy/27056-he-diet-faq.html

I have the LE Diet in my signature because I have probably 100x more questions looking for those!

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh and here are the "forbidden" foods for your blue sway:

Shellfish
Organ meats
Artificial sweeteners
Oils from things that are not even FOOD (cottonseed, canola, safflower)
Shortening
Spirulina and chlorella supplements
Protein shakes containing high amounts of soy protein
Burned foods and barbecued meats
Flaxseed, flax oil, and evening primrose oil in anything but occasional dietary amounts
I would also add going light on milk replacers as the people who had the most milk replacers had the most opposites too

And while obviously this is not a food, you and your husband MUST STOP SMOKING. Quite a few of my blue sway opposites were in people who were smoking.

[Jconger]

Perfect!! Thank you! No smoking here. Is absolutely no artificial sweeteners allowed? The protein shakes that you okayed for me have some soy (mostly whey) and some sucralose. I also drink a half of a sparkling water that has some sucralose. Will that hurt our sway?

I will try to convince him to sleep nude and use a pillow but i have a feeling he won’t. [emoji17] will that hurt our sway a lot?

Thank you again!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Well, I didn't really ok the Spark drink, but it seemed like you were dead set on drinking them so I said "if you must". As long as the PROTEIN is coming from the whey, if there's a secondary much smaller amount of soy (like soy lecithin or whatever, not soy protein isolate) in it that's ok. It's the soy protein that is the issue.

While I don't really think artificial sweetener sways pink, most people would want to give it up totally just in case. Your call to make, because we have gotten a lot of boys conceived while people were using artificial sweeteners and I no longer buy into them swaying pink at all, but at the same time, the traditional recommendation is to avoid them all except stevia/Truvia.

When it comes to hubbies, we just have to roll with what they're willing to do. If he won't do the suggestions, we have to let that go and just sway in the ways we can control! :)

Re the sleeping in the nude, even if he's in baggy PJ's that will work, it's those tighty whiteys we are trying to avoid.

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you! So many questions and you have so many answers!! Thank you! I have stopped drinking Spark for the most part and am drinking green tea, but it definitely does not provide the energy I am use to.
I have put on about 7lbs so hopefully that is enough.
He doesn’t wear whitey tighties but does wear boxer briefs. I’ll keep working on him lol. I can’t get him to not have his laptop on his lap though.

Strange, I don’t see soy listed on the ingredients but it says on the packaging “contains milk and soy”. It must be pretty minimal then since it’s not in the ingredients listing.

I forgot to ask about lubricant? Is there anything to use or avoid? I remember reading about that before and did pre-seed then I thought you had mentioned that could sway pink? I wish we could avoid it all together but majority of the time we need it.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes remember most of the labeling is for people with severe allergies, some of whom even a taste will be too much. So they have warnings if even the smallest amount of soy could be in the shake. But as long as the PROTEIN source is not soy it's fine for our purposes.

7 lbs is great! Fine not to use any more than that.

If you NEED the lube, yes please use Preseed as it's the best for blue there is. If you have a good level of EWCM you don't need the Preseed and can just roll with the EWCM. It's not so much that I think Preseed sways pink (I don't, not at all) but more that EWCM is better so just use that, don't dilute it with Preseed, unless you need the lubrication.

[Jconger]

Ok another question... i noticed my multi has high doses of B vitamins as well. Can you tell me your thoughts on these? Along with two other supplements?

Oh and my husband is now using something for his laptop on his lap.

I have still only had one cycle. I’m not sure if it’s just going to take a while to regulate again or what.
https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201027/9d7090b5f2bf97ec5885064f8d3ed287.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201027/57f7376c9e9927a9185d2743a12de15f.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20201027/abf8042ee7fb96b48ac6a766439b113c.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I can't recommend that vitamin The high B vitamins may mess up your ovulation, and while I can't quite see around the corner it appears to me there are several herbs listed in it as well including at least one thing that may sway pink.

The collagen seems ok.

I cannot recommend the Oasis product as there are tons of herbs in there, not to mention massive doses of B vitamins and artificial sweetener.

[Jconger]

I can't recommend that vitamin The high B vitamins may mess up your ovulation, and while I can't quite see around the corner it appears to me there are several herbs listed in it as well including at least one thing that may sway pink.

The collagen seems ok.

I cannot recommend the Oasis product as there are tons of herbs in there, not to mention massive doses of B vitamins and artificial sweetener.

Ok so are herbs a no go? What other ingredients are a no go in the vitamins? I know the b12. It seems that most vitamins do have b12 though. Am I suppose to take a multi or just one omega?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

100% of B12 is great. 10,000% B12, not so much!

Yes I prefer you guys avoid herbs. not only do many herbs interfere with the menstrual cycle, delaying or in some cases even stopping ovulation, some of them may sway pink, and we know SO little about them, we don't know how even widely used herbs actually sway so it's best to avoid them. :)

I prefer you guys take just a multivitamin with about 100% of stuff (you can take slightly more folic acid/folate and Vit. D) and 500 mg Omega 3/fish oil. I know it seems weird since we say "nutrients sway blue" but when it comes to nutrients, too much can be worse than not enough (since your body will be getting nutrients from foods too)

[Jconger]

Hey so I’m back for another question. I reinjured my back so have lost some of the weight I put on. I’m back to where my body prefers to be around 112. Some days 114. Anyway, that one of my concerns. I’m working on putting it back on. We’ve been having a lot of sex recently. My husband has been off from work so I think that helps his stress level lol. I knew ovulation was coming up but I think my cycle is still trying to regulate. I wasn’t expecting it to be as early as I think it’s going to be this month. I’m concerned the last time we had unprotected sex was only 4 or 5 days before ovulation (I took an opk last night and it was the same color as the control. This morning it was darker than the control). I know this sounds silly but I’m concerned if we got pregnant we would have no chance of having a boy. I’m not really ready to get pregnant again so we were planning on just using protection from here on out but I’d also be sad if we got pregnant and really no chance of having a boy. I know this sounds dumb. I just want your opinion please. Thank you!!

[atomic sagebrush]

sex 4-5 days before ovulation has very low chances of conception. I would be flabbergasted if you conceived from that. and even if you did, it is still totally possible to have a boy.

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you!! I think I’m ovulating several days earlier than I had been, and my body is finally back to its normal ovulation timeframe. If this is the case, it will be 4 days before ovulation... there’s a possibility for 3 but according to my surge I peaked yesterday (which would have been 3 days post). I think I usually ovulate 24-48 hours post peak so fingers crossed I don’t conceive this month, and can actually try lol. Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Even 3 days before ovulation is a longshot. FX and good luck for the FUTURE! :)

[Jconger]

Thank you!! I am taking the multi I shared with you earlier but instead of taking 3 for the full dose, I’m just taking 1 along with 1 omega. How does that sound/look! Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

One more question. Is washing with summers Eve ok? I never thought about that until I saw someone else’s post about changing alkalinity. Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

One more question. Is washing with summers Eve ok? I never thought about that until I saw someone else’s post about changing alkalinity. Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I would avoid that when swaying blue as it's said to sway pink. I am not sure I believe in that very much but it's likely best to avoid just in case.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you!! I am taking the multi I shared with you earlier but instead of taking 3 for the full dose, I’m just taking 1 along with 1 omega. How does that sound/look! Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

One is better but is still a high dose of a couple of the B Vitamins. It's fine as long as you're not seeing any changes in your cycle though.

[Jconger]

How much B12 am i trying to avoid? And the summers Eve soap ?? Thank you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I generally recommend 100% of everything but folic acid/folate and Vit. D. But B12 is somewhat less of a risk than, say, B6 (which is really problematic in higher doses) up to 300% or so.

I doubt that soap makes much difference but I think most would want to avoid it for TTC a boy.

[atomic sagebrush]

I generally recommend 100% of everything but folic acid/folate and Vit. D. But B12 is somewhat less of a risk than, say, B6 (which is really problematic in higher doses) up to 300% or so.

I doubt that soap makes much difference but I think most would want to avoid it for TTC a boy.

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you so much for always answering my questions! And everyone else’s lol. Could you remind me specifically what vitamins/supplements my husband and I should be taking? I’m going to order some products and want to be sure we are both taking the right things and avoiding the things that should be avoided. Thank you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

How does this look? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210102/f75ae5a2e48e34e71c49695113257385.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Ihttps://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210102/08deea044ce04b5d6de3a4d91d3e1d65.jpg
Here’s the breakdown of the vitamins. I’d take just not the pink since it’s a thermogenic. Thoughts? Are the numbers better too?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I like you guys to take a decent well rounded prenatal with about 100% of most things (as we've discussed). A probiotic, about 500 mg fish oil max, up to 2000 mcg folic acid or folate especially if you're drinking green tea. If you want, you can add 100 mg coq10.

For hubby, I like him on a men's vitamin that has about 100% of most things, probiotic, 500 mg fish oil, 100 mg coq10, 500 mg arginine, and 1000 mg carnitine.

You also may want to take guaifenesin for 5 days coming into O and 3 days afterwards.

[atomic sagebrush]

I would prefer you avoided the ones with all the herbs. We do not know how they sway and if they're safe.

[Jconger]

Ok great! Thank you. The vitamins I just sent have most of those things. The folic acid isn’t as high. I’m not drinking green tea. Should I be? If not, is 100% folate ok? These are supplements that we both can take (not a female or make vitamin). Do you think these would work for everything recommended? I can add L arginine as well for hubby. Are we talking about a particular cough syrup? I remember there being ones to avoid for CM. Thank you always!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's fine for both of you if you can find some without all the herbs.

You need not a cough syrup but guaifenesin as the only active ingredient.

[Jconger]

Sorry somehow I didn’t see the second message from last time about the herbs. I think those are in the actotherm that I would not be taking. Is it ok for my husband to take those though? The only thing so see Id be taking is the Astaxanthin. Is that ok? It’s with the omega 3.

Ok I’ll look for just that by it’s own. As long as I start my period [emoji38][emoji847][emoji2957]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Also, this is to help increase my egg white CM right? I need more so we don’t have to use lube. Appreciate you answering all my silly questions!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Also thoughts on these? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210103/c96d0481c5adc244a94fd22ba6bc6224.jpg
https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210103/b39000c897c77cce9bd94648974d208b.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I would prefer you both stay away from herbs. We just don't have the data on most herbs and how they really sway for me to feel good about recommending htem. Astaxanthin on paper should be good, but we just do not know and cannot say for sure.

yes, the guaifenesin is meant to increase EWCM and help the sperm swim through it.

[atomic sagebrush]

Too many of some of the nutrients, some of the other stuff we don't know how they sway, and then the arginine is really disruptive to women's cycles.

[Jconger]

Ok the Arginine Extreme doesn’t seem to have any herbs so that one is ok? And my husband is the only one to use that right? As for the green tea. Do you want us drinking green tea?? Or just an option?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

One more thing. How come the carnitine is so high for him? Most products I’m looking at have maybe 10-25 mg. What is it for exactly? thanks!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Ok the Arginine Extreme doesn’t seem to have any herbs so that one is ok? And my husband is the only one to use that right? As for the green tea. Do you want us drinking green tea?? Or just an option?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

It's ok for your husband I suppose but I guess I thought you were thinking of using it.

Many people use green tea for a blue sway. I am ok with that, I do think tea likely sways blue, though too much green tea has seemed to dry up some people's CM as well.

[atomic sagebrush]

One more thing. How come the carnitine is so high for him? Most products I’m looking at have maybe 10-25 mg. What is it for exactly? thanks!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I don't know what you're looking at but most carnitine supplements have between 500-1500 mg carnitine in them https://supplementhound.com/best-carnitine-supplements/

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you! Is this a must? I can get him to take our products but something random off of Amazon he might be a little less adapt to take. Thank you so much for all of your feedback! Hoping I get to try in a few months. How long should we be on these sips before ttc?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

No, it's not a must but it is considered to be a good blue sway tactic. Your choice. :)

I would give it 6 weeks.

[Jconger]

Well, no chance of swaying here. Another oops. Definitely 3 or 4 days before ovulation so I guess here comes girl 5. I am feeling really sad about it. I really hoped to try for a boy. Do you know of any boys being conceived that early before ovulation?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Timing does not work. 50-50 boys and girls are conceived every cycle day and this is what all reputable scientists that properly determined ovulation (rather than just telling people to have sex on a particular day or having people guess at when they ovulated) have found.

At least 3 of my 4 boys were conceived with cutoffs. Two of them were with long cutoffs, one my period had just gotten over with and the other one, we were going to try that month and then stopped before ovulation time and I was shocked I got pregnant. 3rd boy I was trying for a cutoff and my husband was not even home when O happened. The 4th, I don't know when I conceived him, might have been with a cutoff, I wasn't paying attention that time.

My girl, I got late at night on O-1, technically after midnight, so it was on O Day really.

It just doesn't work. YOu have a great chance of a boy still.

[Jconger]

I’m over here like [emoji24][emoji24] i know this is a lie i have believe since before I conceived my first daughter. I keep feeling like God is saying if He wanted me to have a son HE would do it... not me. If I followed timing perfectly than i would think i somehow did it. Thank you! I need to pray these old ways of thinking. I did cut my vitamins and omegas like you said. My husband stopped playing soccer (bc of the pandemic). I stopped the shakes with that product in it and focused just on eating more... the scale moved so much around 4lbs though [emoji2372] I just can’t believe it happened lol. This baby is obviously meant to be bc I read it’s like 10% chance of getting pregnant day 4 or so. Thank you for your encouragement. There is still a little of hope for me... for the fifth time lol.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Oh and we only released that once. There was plenty before and after but he held himself [emoji2360] perhaps that could be an issue too [emoji23][emoji23] hopefully one chance but going often helped. I remember you stressing at least twice.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

You still have every chance of a boy. It can still happen, do not despair!

[atomic sagebrush]

You still have every chance of a boy. It can still happen, do not despair!

[Jconger]

Thank you so much atomic!! Do you know if there is a sept group going already? Oh and my last three will all be like 2 weeks apart in birthdays. This baby is due sept 20, my other surprise was born on her due date sept 28 and then Finley (the girl i tried swaying with but didnt follow perfectly) was oct 11!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BunnyGirl19]

There’s a July/August/September group already. I just joined. I’m due either Sept. 17 or 19 depending on if my doctor decided to use LMP or ovulation day.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you so much atomic!! Do you know if there is a sept group going already? Oh and my last three will all be like 2 weeks apart in birthdays. This baby is due sept 20, my other surprise was born on her due date sept 28 and then Finley (the girl i tried swaying with but didnt follow perfectly) was oct 11!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

OH we have that too, as we call it "the birthday season!" It doesn't mean the genders will be the same though, we have done polls on that before and tons of people have opposite genders born in the same month or two month period.

[Jconger]

OH we have that too, as we call it "the birthday season!" It doesn't mean the genders will be the same though, we have done polls on that before and tons of people have opposite genders born in the same month or two month period.

Oh funny!! So that’s a popular thing huh? I’m still shocked I’m pregnant. Because we weren’t trying and it was what I thought, far enough away from O, we only released that once inside. We bded that morning and I believe day prior or couple days plus the following days (he just held himself so I don’t *think* any release inside). Anyway, I’m feeling bummed it was only once. I know you stress frequency and not timing, but we didn’t have either... [emoji849][emoji849]
The things that were different this time was more sex before the one release. We would usually go once every week or so due to his high stress with medical training. (That sort of lines up with the abstaining thing for girls). I do believe I put on some extra muscle even though the scale was moving up and down. I stopped my shakes and dropped my omegas/vitamins so they were the right proportion. I know you said it is very possible to still have a boy but I’m just so bummed I didn’t get to sway again. This is definitely our last and I feel like our chances for a boy are very low. Sorry. I just don’t want to be disappointed for the fifth time... I know God knows what I need so I’m praying He changes my heart. I need more faith and to trust Him more.
Percentage wise, how much do you feel frequency affects a sway?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

It just seems to work out that way for some of us! :)

We have PLENTY of people who still get boys with one attempt (and with otherwise good pink sways.) I can't give you a straight percentage because people do so many things for swaying, I can't know for sure how much any one thing sways.

[Jconger]

It just seems to work out that way for some of us! :)

We have PLENTY of people who still get boys with one attempt (and with otherwise good pink sways.) I can't give you a straight percentage because people do so many things for swaying, I can't know for sure how much any one thing sways.

Thank you! It did sound like a couple of your boys were one attempt with a cut off... I’m just still in disbelief lol and you must be flabbergasted as you said earlier if I was to fall pregnant [emoji23][emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you! It did sound like a couple of your boys were one attempt with a cut off... I’m just still in disbelief lol and you must be flabbergasted as you said earlier if I was to fall pregnant [emoji23][emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Three of my boys were long cutoffs, one by design trying to do Shettles (I think he may have been one attempt too though I can't quite remember) and then the other two, one we weren't even trying and I had sex right after my period had ended when I thought it was safe, and the other, my husband changed his mind about trying and we stopped long before O happened, I was sure I had NO chance that month either. The 4th boy was a sneak attack, IDK when I got him, but we were having regular unprotected sex all the time so it would have been very unlikely it was only on O Day!

[Jconger]

Thank you! You give me some hope. I mean I have no idea if any sneaked in those other days... I mean we weren’t using great contraception [emoji23] by any means.... maybe something pre happened?! Thinking back on my sway with Finley, you are right I think we had a great chance for a boy with her... our timing/frequency and all. I’ve just never had the chance to try 24 hours after a positive opk. I mean I did for 9 months and never got pregnant. Then stopped and found you guys and got pregnant.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

That is entirely possible!

A lot of people get BFN with trying 24 hours after pos OPK. I hear that a lot.

No matter what I think you guys are still in it to win it!

[Jconger]

Thanks so much for your encouragement! Im feeling bummed as I think about the fact that we used a silicone lubricant along with my cm. I know we had more bding than normal and therefore I had a lot more but we still used it... so many things going against our chance for a boy. Praying it’s just a miracle (I mean 4 days prior to O seems like a miracle lol) and this is finally our boy!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Sending you all my blue dust!

[Jconger]

Thank you! I know this is silly but you’ve been doing this for so long... have you seen any similar stories as ours resulting in a boy?!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[4blue2pink]

Congratulations JConger :heart: 2 of my boys were 1 attempt (pink sways) i dont know about this team green baby but if its a boy it'll be our 3rd 1 attempt boy. Our first 4 boys came from bd through the month, i didnt track ovulation at all back then. Everything crossed this is your boy!

[Jconger]

Congratulations JConger :heart: 2 of my boys were 1 attempt (pink sways) i dont know about this team green baby but if its a boy it'll be our 3rd 1 attempt boy. Our first 4 boys came from bd through the month, i didnt track ovulation at all back then. Everything crossed this is your boy!

Thank you!! I would love that!! I’m concerned because we weren’t planning on getting pregnant. We were bding a lot bc my husband was on vacation and less stressed lol. We were sort of using a bc [emoji23] anyway I know we used a little lubricant and I read that can affect it too. Praying for a miracle [emoji170][emoji170] Thank you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Thirdtimelucky01]

Thank you! I know this is silly but you’ve been doing this for so long... have you seen any similar stories as ours resulting in a boy?!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I had two boys with one attempt (and that’s all I have so far)! You definitely have a chance! Good luck and blue dust! [emoji170][emoji170][emoji170]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you! I know this is silly but you’ve been doing this for so long... have you seen any similar stories as ours resulting in a boy?!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes, all the time! People often plan to sway and then conceive without actually doing it! And many of these babies are still boys.

[Jconger]

This sounds silly but have you heard of people having a boy with using other forms of lubricant? It’s nice to hear from those who have had one attempt with a cut off having a boy, but we did use a little bit of lubricant which also makes me nervous [emoji849] I’m just preparing myself for a fifth [emoji175]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I can say this much - we dropped the lubricating jellies from pink sways for most people in no small part because they didn't work!

[Jconger]

I can say this much - we dropped the lubricating jellies from pink sways for most people in no small part because they didn't work!

Oh ok. I did not see that. I only saw the older posts not encouraging it bc it makes you less fertile... anything less fertile helps girl is what it seemed like.... i feel like getting pregnant so far away from ovulation, without trying on the first month lol would seem like I am super fertile [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

As you know, I focused on diet. I feel like the biggest change this go around was eliminating my meal replacement shakes with that product in it (in something), no extra fiber sources (outside of food), just a little Spark for taste (which your concern was ovulating late and i somehow ovulated earlier) and lowering my omegas and vitamins to a simpler dose. Oh and we had way more sex earlier in the month. And mid month (“protected” minus that one oops. Which I read on here could possibly bump ovulation up?? Maybe that’s what happened with me... or God just really had a particular sperm that needed to meet this egg this month [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] thanks for listening to all of my crazy thoughts.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I don't believe that having sex is changing people's ovulation. I know people keep reading that on here, but I just wasn't in the mood to argue that day LOL so I didn't go to the mat over it (one of the ladies in that thread was very confrontational and I was sick of arguing with her to be honest).

People have sex all the time and it doesn't change their O Day. While I understand that happens in animals frequently and hypothetically supposedly it might rarely play some part in human conception I don't think that it happens with any regularity at all and doesn't fit into what we're doing here.

[Jconger]

Ok well that’s good to know. Thanks. I’m glad you don’t think lubricant sways anymore too. Well, hopefully my food and supps helped and my husbands lower stress really made a difference! [emoji23] i might need to find out early so i don’t go crazy with this


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Oh and I read on here getting up right away after bding isn’t good either... so I suppose all odds are against me lol. It would be a miracle to see [emoji170]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[4blue2pink]

Oh and I read on here getting up right away after bding isn’t good either... so I suppose all odds are against me lol. It would be a miracle to see [emoji170]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I get up straight after dh finishes (to go have a wee) every single time we bd, always have done. Didnt stop our 6 boys! Youve every chance of this being your boy :)

[Jconger]

I get up straight after dh finishes (to go have a wee) every single time we bd, always have done. Didnt stop our 6 boys! Youve every chance of this being your boy :)

Thank you so much! I think reading everything for a girl away is making me feel like I have no chance because so much of what we did this time is similar to that. Lol I’m obsessing a little bit because I had absolutely no control over any of it this time [emoji23] I really thought bding twice that day would leave nothing for the “unprotected” time. Thank you though for your encouragement!! I really appreciate it!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh and I read on here getting up right away after bding isn’t good either... so I suppose all odds are against me lol. It would be a miracle to see [emoji170]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I always get up after BD and got boys that way!

[BunnyGirl19]

I always get up right after sex and got boys. I’ve gotten boys with BD multiple times per day as well. The only thing I’ve been able to connect to gender outcome for me personally is my own diet. Timing, number of attempts, and DH’s lifestyle/diet don’t seem to matter for us, or not much versus my own diet.

[Jconger]

I always get up right after sex and got boys. I’ve gotten boys with BD multiple times per day as well. The only thing I’ve been able to connect to gender outcome for me personally is my own diet. Timing, number of attempts, and DH’s lifestyle/diet don’t seem to matter for us, or not much versus my own diet.

Ok well that would be great! Lol i changed my diet. The biggest difference for me was i stopped doing salads for lunch and got more calories in. I changed my supps up a bit as well. I didn’t do primrose oil this time either which atomic told me could sway girl (when i was trying for my 3rd). I also included red meat a couple of times a week. I put on some weight but the scale moved up and down. I definitely put on muscle though and as Dh said even when the scale moved down it didn’t look like i lost any muscle. [emoji1695]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

I keep coming on here and searching the web for research that shows boys can be conceived days prior to ovulation. I’m really struggling. Not being able to try just keeps getting to me. I still can’t believe I ovulated so much earlier. I literally ovulated 5 days earlier than I had been. I know my cycle was still adjusting from weaning but still. I would usually ovulate day 21 most months with an occasional day 19. I just was not expecting day 19 to happen after my average having been day 23/24. So getting pregnant from an attempt on day 16 just seemed way far fetched... unless somehow it was from pre but I read that is very unlikely. I can’t stop obsessing over the fact that we had several unprotected bds earlier in the month but the only one unprotected later on was cd16. I mean there was plenty of releasing and bding just all from pulling out. Ugh I’m obsessing. This is for sure our last and I just can’t imagine not having a son. I’m pretty sure getting pregnant like this is making our chances slim though. I just need to trust God. Lord, please help me to trust You. To release every single thing (REST) and know if You have one more girl to complete our family it is Your will. Take this desire for a son away from me too. [emoji170]

Thanks ladies. I just needed to vent. You are the only ones who understand this strong desire.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Ugh and then I just found on here that HCG levels can indicate gender. DPO 17 and it was very dark. I’m assuming that is a sign for a girl. [emoji17]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Slingers]

I am so sorry to read your struggle Jconger. I had one pregnancy that wasn't planned and it really overwhelmed me. I felt my chance was taken away from me. Mentally a hard time. Take care :hugs:

[Jconger]

I am so sorry to read your struggle Jconger. I had one pregnancy that wasn't planned and it really overwhelmed me. I felt my change was taken away from me. Mentally a hard time. Take care :hugs:

Did you end up getting the gender you hoped for?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Slingers]

No, wish I could answer differently. But please hold on to Atomic her words: you can always get your desired gender. Lots of women get both gender without doing anything (different).

[Jconger]

What does your family look like? We have four girls. I feel like a boy should be in there at some point [emoji23] but Thank you for that reminder from Atomic. I just feel worse and sooner than I did with any of my girls... I’m just assuming it’s another girl.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I keep coming on here and searching the web for research that shows boys can be conceived days prior to ovulation. I’m really struggling. Not being able to try just keeps getting to me. I still can’t believe I ovulated so much earlier. I literally ovulated 5 days earlier than I had been. I know my cycle was still adjusting from weaning but still. I would usually ovulate day 21 most months with an occasional day 19. I just was not expecting day 19 to happen after my average having been day 23/24. So getting pregnant from an attempt on day 16 just seemed way far fetched... unless somehow it was from pre but I read that is very unlikely. I can’t stop obsessing over the fact that we had several unprotected bds earlier in the month but the only one unprotected later on was cd16. I mean there was plenty of releasing and bding just all from pulling out. Ugh I’m obsessing. This is for sure our last and I just can’t imagine not having a son. I’m pretty sure getting pregnant like this is making our chances slim though. I just need to trust God. Lord, please help me to trust You. To release every single thing (REST) and know if You have one more girl to complete our family it is Your will. Take this desire for a son away from me too. [emoji170]

Thanks ladies. I just needed to vent. You are the only ones who understand this strong desire.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

The Internet is largely useless for stuff like this, because so many people are told about timing, so when they get a boy, they think back and ASSUME with absolutely no evidence that's when they ovulated. But the truth is that 95% of the people reporting about ovulating online have no evidence about when they ovulated and are guessing based on nothing, or things like temping and CM which are not accurate either.

But studies over the past 50 years have shown that Shettles was complete junk. Even Dr. Shettles would have retracted it by now based on the research which has completely proved his theory to be nonsense now. But he died and couldn't. The only people selling Shettles for the past 3 decades are all people capitalizing on his name to repackage flawed science.

I PROMISE you can get boys days before O.

[atomic sagebrush]

Ugh and then I just found on here that HCG levels can indicate gender. DPO 17 and it was very dark. I’m assuming that is a sign for a girl. [emoji17]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

EVERYONE has dark pregnancy tests 17 DPO.

Additionally, the "HCG levels" cannot be tested by pregnancy tests anyway as they don't accurately reflect the level of HCG in your blood. Pregnancy tests don't tell you much of anything about what your HCG is really doing.

And finally, with the HCG levels, that is just an AVERAGE. That means that there are plenty of boy pregnancies with high HCG and girl pregnancies with low HCG and everything in between. It's like height. While you can GUESS that a person who is 5-6 is a girl and 5 10 is a man, it's in no way a guarantee and millions of people fall outside that. And then most people are like 5-8 and you can't tell at ALL their gender based on height. So you just cannot read anything into that!

[Jconger]

EVERYONE has dark pregnancy tests 17 DPO.

Additionally, the "HCG levels" cannot be tested by pregnancy tests anyway as they don't accurately reflect the level of HCG in your blood. Pregnancy tests don't tell you much of anything about what your HCG is really doing.

And finally, with the HCG levels, that is just an AVERAGE. That means that there are plenty of boy pregnancies with high HCG and girl pregnancies with low HCG and everything in between. It's like height. While you can GUESS that a person who is 5-6 is a girl and 5 10 is a man, it's in no way a guarantee and millions of people fall outside that. And then most people are like 5-8 and you can't tell at ALL their gender based on height. So you just cannot read anything into that!

Thank you Atomic!! My husband would love you. Lol he is a researcher for spine and is always telling me so much of the stuff I read is garbage science. I just buy into too much because of wanting something so badly. Thank you for your words. I greatly appreciate it.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

I was thinking about this time vs previous times. Even though we weren’t trying. All of our other pregnancies were based off of 1 attempt after abstaining. My husband was in medical school/residency so so much stress that we probably only bded 1 a week. When we were trying, which was only for 2 of our 5, we waited for a positive opk and did it several times (but had abstained). This time we had been bding a lot more frequently. A couple times the days before our one “oops”.

Looking at my first positive opk was Sunday night (we had dtd Friday night... Christmas actually lol) and my “peak” according to the app said Tuesday. I’m thinking I must have ovulated 24hrs at the original positive opk vs “peak” putting us at the 3 DBO vs 4 or 5 like I originally thought. Although, I suppose I could have had a positive opk prior to Sunday night (that was just when I took my first test. I’m not sure how long a surge lasts). We also bded frequently earlier in the month without protection.

Even with the cut off, hopefully the frequent bding made things different this time around [emoji1695] and hopefully the cut off just proves I’m super fertile and helps too [emoji23]

[atomic sagebrush]

That's how so many of us, myself included, got our boys! FX and tons of blue dust headed your way!

[Jconger]

Thank you so much atomic for allowing me to get everything in my head out. It would be so awesome if God just said “here’s your son. And you didn’t have to “do” anything.” Now i just have to decide when we are going to find out. Thanks again for listening and giving me hope [emoji170][emoji170][emoji170]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

That would be awesome and it's what we are all hoping and praying for you!

[Slingers]

What does your family look like? We have four girls. I feel like a boy should be in there at some point [emoji23] but Thank you for that reminder from Atomic. I just feel worse and sooner than I did with any of my girls... I’m just assuming it’s another girl.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Sorry, didn't catch this. I have two boys and miscarried what I think was also a boy. I swayed girl this time and will find out in 2-3 weeks. Time is going slow right now :) Don't know the truth of this, but I read somewhere that pregnancy symptoms sometimes get worse by every next pregnancy.

[Jconger]

Oh I’m so sorry to hear you miscarried? Was that the surprise baby? I miscarried between DD1 and DD2. I know that feeling too well. I’m always paranoid every pregnancy as well. That’s so exciting!! Can’t wait to hear who is on the way for you!! Praying this is finally the son I’ve been praying for for years.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Sorry, didn't catch this. I have two boys and miscarried what I think was also a boy. I swayed girl this time and will find out in 2-3 weeks. Time is going slow right now :) Don't know the truth of this, but I read somewhere that pregnancy symptoms sometimes get worse by every next pregnancy.

And yes! I feel like my symptoms have gotten worse every pregnancy but it might just be. I read atomic does not associate them with gender so I threw that out the window. Just earlier and stronger than ever before. Thankfully i don’t usually throw up but there’s been a few times already that i thought I might. Never had that happen before.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Atomic, I know you have said timing doesn’t work, but one attempt in the fertile window is really stressed for a girl and multiple times in the fertile window for a boy. When you said fertile window are you talking about the week of ovulation? Like 5 days prior, day of and day after? I know you said some of your boys were conceived similar to what we accidentally did lol, but it still leaves me with “one attempt” or oops in that fertile window timeframe. Possibly one at O-5. I just want to understand the reasoning. As you know, most of my kids were conceived with 1 attempt and i feel like this probably won’t be any different other than all of the bding outside that fertile window and my diet and supps. I just keep feeling deflated since we didn’t get to actually “try”. Then seeing so many comments on baby dust about their perfect sway with a 3 day cut off. I need to stop following that group lol. Thanks for your feedback and encouragement.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

It is very unlikely you got pregnant with an attempt from O-5. Let me go look up again what you did and I'll comment in more detail.

[atomic sagebrush]

You know, going back and rereading this I'm honestly not clear on what happened and when. Can you give me a rundown of when you had sex and when you think you ovulated (and why)? I find it very unlikely you conceived from one attempt O-5, which means you ovulated sooner or later than you think, and you may have had more than one attempt.

[Jconger]

Yes so I believe there were multiple times unprotected in the beginning of the month and as it got closer. I think there was a time at o-5 but o-3 is the last time we had protected sex (well pull out probably on o day but I read the chances of that are like incredibly low to get pregnant from pre). So... I’m thinking in my fertile window it was really only like one time... which I guess goes back to my question of why one attempt in fertile window for girls. I know you were encouraging me that our story sounded similar to how you conceived a couple of your boys. Thanks 🤍


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

What about before O-5? And what cycle days were these?

[atomic sagebrush]

And yes, with two of my boys I had only one attempt with LONNNG cutoffs. My first boy we got literally the first time we had sex, I thought I was safe because I'd just gotten off my period, but nope! And my second boy, we were thinking of trying, but my husband changed his mind many days before I was due to ovulate (I wasn't paying enough attention back then to say for sure, but it had to be CD 10 or earlier, so O-4, UNLESS I ovulated early that month!)

[Jconger]

What about before O-5? And what cycle days were these?

Yes, lots before o-5. I wasn’t tracking those because I knew you couldn’t conceive a week prior to ovulation so i wasn’t concerned. My cycle bumped up this month though. I usually ovulate day 21. It seems to be several at 21 and then once in a while 19. This is the first month I jumped from day 23/26 to day 19 is my guess. According to 24 hours from my first opk I took that was equal to the control. The next day the app said was my peak though. I’ve always thought it was based off the first one and 24-48 hours from that... anyway I’m assuming day 19 since I never ovulated on 20. But who knows... our times unprotected were up until cd16. Several unprotected earlier in the month, i believe there was one cd14, cd16, condom cd17, and pullout on cd19. I mean it doesn’t matter now bc i can’t change anything i was just curious about the one attempt during the fertile window. I mean i basically did that on accident i suppose but there was plenty of unprotected sex as well.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

I should also mention, the first opk I took, I believe was a positive. I haven’t done opks for a few years so I have no idea how long my surge lasts. Maybe I had a positive even before this?! I’m not sure since I took the first one as soon as they arrived and I expected it to be negative lol. https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210206/57043a584b93108ad60a6b463f1c7324.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Oh and it was right before bed that I took that first test. Like I mentioned, as soon as Amazon dropped it off lol. I’m not sure if that matters or not


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Well, that's what I'm driving at, is that your fertile window may have been sooner. If you ovulated more on CD 15 you might have had more than one attempt without that long cutoff.

The apps are garbage and the OPK are not reliable because you can get both false positive and false negatives.

I think it's very unlikely you conceived from an O-5 shot. You ovulated sooner, and in that case it's entirely possible you have had more than one attempt.

[Jconger]

I don’t think I could have ovulated that early though right? I mean I had positive opks immediately but your surge doesn’t last for days and days right?! And you don’t think they can accurately tell you when you’ll ovulate? I know you tell people to intentionally have one attempt at a positive opk so I was just curious. I was thinking I probably conceived from o-3 and still only had “one attempt” in my fertile window because we were trying to prevent [emoji23] as you already know... I suppose I won’t know when I ovulated until my first ultrasound. I just wish we had had more oopses during that “fertile window” vs just the one lol. I know there’s no amount of information that will change anything.... thanks for listening and trying to help me figure out what happened.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BunnyGirl19]

LH surges are variable. Some have a very short burst of LH that triggers ovulation. Some have a long, slow rise that can take days before finally ovulating. Some get a positive OPK after an egg has already released. The level that LH peaks at can vary greatly, too. Some tests for LH have a low positive threshold, others have a higher threshold. Because of all the variables, they can’t really be depended upon to give you an accurate ovulation day on their own.

[atomic sagebrush]

So you hadn't taken any OPK before CD 18?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, you absolutely could have ovulated earlier especially if you didn't test with OPK before CD 18.

Not only could you have had many days of positive OPK (this is not uncommon, you could absolutely still have positives CD 18 from CD 15/16 O) as Bunny is describing, it is also that you could have surged once, ovulated, and then these CD 18ish pos OPK were detecting NOT ovulation but the secondary estrogen surge that happens a week or so later. We often see people get a positive OPK about a week after ovulation. So it can be that you got a true positive CD 10-12, ovulated CD 14 or 15, and then a week later started testing with your OPK and picked up the secondary surge and not the surge that happens with ovulation.

[Jconger]

Ok yes I didn’t test until CD18. I wasn’t planning to ovulate until CD23 or 24 since that was what I was having the first two months with starting my period back up. This was my third cycle since getting pregnant with my 4th. I’ve never in my life ovulated before CD19 though. I feel like CD18 was definitely a positive though even though the app said my peak was CD19. I had changed my diet though. I mean I had really been focusing on HE until the last two weeks when I had injured my back. I don’t know if increasing my caloric intake would have bumped up my ovulation? Cd 14 or 15 would just be very very early for me... how accurate do you feel like ultrasounds are at telling your due date and when you conceived? Would I get answers from that? I’m due to go in in two weeks.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

So you hadn't taken any OPK before CD 18?

That is right. The night of CD18 was my first OPK. I assumed it would have been negative.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Even if you've never ovulated sooner than CD 19, you can absolutely ovulate sooner at any point in time. Diet changes do affect the cycle sometimes quite dramatically. We have people both pink and blue swayers who will go from long cycles to CD 14 O in the span of a month, and are shocked when they O sooner than they expected.

Ultrasounds can be accurate, but it depends on how dedicated and skilled the tech is. Sometimes they're just like "whatever" and take some basic measurements and aren't that particular about getting it right

[atomic sagebrush]

That is right. The night of CD18 was my first OPK. I assumed it would have been negative.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

You can't assume that though for all the reasons we've already discussed.

For now, let's just KFX that you Oed sooner than you think and actually had many attempts. It is entirely entirely possible that's the case.

[Jconger]

That would be great! If not, hopefully just increasing our bding helped in general. Plus my diet changes. I know you have said several times you got pregnant with boys with a cut off... I had just read all of the one attempts in the fertile window which made me nervous. Lol


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Even with classic perfect pink sways we still get boys anywhere from 25-33% of the time. You did a LOT to change things! You are not out of this by a LONGSHOT! FX and blue dust headed your way!

[Jconger]

Thank you so much for your encouragement. What do you feel like is the thing that helps swaying the most? Is it frequency, diet, supplements? I know it’s a combination but what seems to be the thing that tends to sway the most?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I can't answer that, I just don't have the ability to say. I can't ask anyone to just do one thing in isolation so I can have a "test" of these things on their own, so it's just not possible for me to quantify it.

[Jconger]

That makes sense. Were you saying earlier even the most perfect sways, with following everything, fail 25-33%? Or are the opposite of what they hope and sway for? No baby is a fail 🤍🤍


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes. We have between 66-75% success rates.

I agree no baby is a fail, it's just the terminology people use (and used long before I got into this business) is that of "failed sways" even though you're completely right about that.

[Jconger]

So strange it wouldn’t let me respond a few days ago! I sent you a personal message but I’ll post here. Thank you for your help in all my questions. I’m hoping I just had a long surge and actually ovulated earlier than I think. Two times in the fertile window would be great! I mean if I had had a positive OPK on CD 16 or 17 and just had several days of a surge then I would have hypothetically ovulated CD 17 or 18 and would have bd on CD 14, 16 (5, 4 and 2 days before O or something along those lines. We did like 5 days or so in a row.) Hopefully I’ll know more when I have my ultrasound just a little over a week. I’ll update you then. Thanks though for all the statistics and hope that this could be our boy. I mean after a while a coin has to flip to the other side right?! [emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Exactly!

[Jconger]

Ok saw baby! Measured at 10w 1 d. Is there a nub? I can’t tell. I’m not sure if it even works this early. Thoughts?? It is a day earlier than I thought. I know these things can be off though right? If that was the case though we would have BDed I’m thinking 6, 5, 4 & 2 days before ovulation. It was several days before because like I said I wasn’t planning to ovulate until CD21 and not CD18. The heart rate was high and from this I think I just see the umbilical cord going up so no nub indicator?? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210222/fe6164de73f2bac44a396d1ba15a66f8.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

It's too early. All babies look like girls at this stage of gestation because the Y chromosome is still dormant. There is no way to tell gender on an ultrasound.

yes, that massive thing is the cord LOL!

[Jconger]

It's too early. All babies look like girls at this stage of gestation because the Y chromosome is still dormant. There is no way to tell gender on an ultrasound.

yes, that massive thing is the cord LOL!

Ok Thank you! When can you see it from ultrasound? We are going to pass on the test since I don’t care to pay the money and want to think it could be a boy a bit longer lol. We didn’t get to hear the heart rate but the student tech measured it at 184. That seems crazy high... i think you’ve said before we have no indicator of gender by heart rate either? So really i have nothing to gauge any of this on right? Lol it could still be a boy?? [emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

I got the ultrasound and they actually put in 10w 2d so then maybe it was all bumped up a day! That would be so awesome if I ovulated even earlier with only 1 day cut off and lots of chances!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Late in the 12th week, and 13-14 week via nub. Potty shot from 15 weeks on though it's more reliable after the 16th week.

Heart rate does not predict gender. At this gestation that's a normal heart rate - you're in the time frame where the baby's heart beats the fastest, up to 190 BPM is normal. It will slow down over time.

One of my boy's heart rates was often in the 180s even later on. (to this day he is still easily upset LOL) My daughter was always in the lower ranges, in fact the lowest of my five.

[Jconger]

Ok Thank you! So really I have nothing to go off of right now except that baby measured a little earlier than what I had predicted. They said they were going to go off of my LMP even though I told them my cycle is longer. They were like well we have you measuring at 10w 1d which is only off by 3 days from your LMP so we won’t change it. However, in the ultrasound they put 10w 2d. The student had me at 9w 4d which made me really panic lol. Then the tech came in and said when the baby stretches out you can get a more accurate read. I hope she was right! Then what you said would be true and there would having been lots more bding and only 1 day cut off[emoji1695] [emoji170] i do keep trying to tell myself it’s another girl though since it seems like all my other pregnancies/babies [emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Oh and that skull theory? Is no good either right? I know you said no to Ramzi. We didn’t want to pay anything out of pocket for the NIPT just to find out gender. What are your thoughts on the sneak peek? I feel like I’ve seen mixed reviews.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

The only things that work are NIPT and waiting till the end of the 12th week or later for nub, then later for the potty shot. Don't waste your money on the Sneak Peek

[Jconger]

Hey so I’m trying to determine what to go off of my new DD. I was originally going from when I *thought* I ovulated. However, as I mentioned, I was measuring 2 days ahead of that. My midwife is sticking with my LMP since the baby measured only two days behind that. I’ve never ovulated by the 14 days so I feel like the measurement date or when I thought made more sense to go by. What is your take atomic? I’d like to have a good estimated DD to say I’m this many weeks! [emoji38]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I'd probably just split the difference between the two dates! :)

[atomic sagebrush]

If you're asking my opinion, the unfortunate truth is both LMP and the measurements can be off. The LMP can be wrong because O day can change and isn't always 14 days after CD 1 anyway, and the measurements are in theory more accurate but in practice the techs have bad days, they get in a hurry, etc. If someone had a gun to my head I'd say the measurements are better but they're not infallible either.

[Jconger]

Ok so don’t go off when i think I ovulated right? Bc my first OPK i took was CD18 and it was positive. I was going off 24 hours from that but the baby measured 3 days ahead of that. I think the tech was probably fairly accurate since the first gal was just learning and had me a week behind. Then the new lady came in and said the student didn’t even need her but she measured me over what I thought. Then she said it was 2 days shy of my LMP so they wouldn’t change my DD. So should I go in between what they measured at and my guess? Or between the LMP and measurements?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Remember, I'm not convinced you ovulated when you think you did. You started the OPK too late.

Can I ask why it matters?? DD are not reliable anyway. Just split the difference if it's important to you but it really makes no difference either way. If you end up needing a planned C-section or whatever it's still all so close it wouldn't affect the baby's health negatively.

I'm just worried this is your mind still playing tricks on you trying to figure out when you ovulated, which we've already gone over in detail.

[Jconger]

Lol possibly. I also just like to know when to say I’m such and such weeks. My first was “a week late” which I don’t think was true knowing that I ovulate later (I ran a ton before having her so I wonder if I ovulated even later then due to what we talked about). The others were “early” and my last came on her DD. It’s just fun to have one I suppose. I always *knew* or (thought I did) when I ovulated with my others. It’s just weird thinking I’m wrong this time. Thank you for all your encouragement and support. I’ve learned a lot from you and that I really don’t know most of these things lol


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Honestly, you could go with either date and they'd both be accurate within the margin of error.

In addition to there being variables in when you ovulate, there are also some differences in how every individual's body finishes up pregnancy - some of us are always a little early, others a little late, that sort of thing. They should honestly give us a "due WEEK" instead of a day, it's so silly to give people DD, when we know they aren't even legit! :)

[Jconger]

We got a sneak peak today! Any nub? I’m 12 weeks today so i don’t even know if it’s accurate https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210306/3e2662885367f9b1cc15a9fed22860ad.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BunnyGirl19]

I can only see part of the nub, but there’s other stuff in the way so I’d hate to guess.

[Jconger]

Ok this is the nub though right? I think this is the best shot I got
https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210306/4cf886b8b549774a1e4f27b23443aea6.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

There’s nothing here right?
https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210306/e1f3f4e873041e7190460a303f6c3802.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BunnyGirl19]

43234
It’s a little higher than you circled, but you can’t clearly see all of it, just part of it.

[Jconger]

Oh boo. I thought I was looking at the right spot. So is it the longer thing? If it’s that, than I guess it’s another girl... that thing looks parallel to the spine.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Is it this long thing? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210307/9c384a1498dbd5db9ec76c14fcc9e41b.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Or this between the two white dots? https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210307/f966b09ab2f7a23a5ca1647225387e01.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

Or is it that? Lol I was trying to find the bladder and go off of that but there are so many white and “black openings” it’s hard to tell. The long tube I circled above has a black thing below it so I thought that was it but there’s no nub on that line. It looks like it’s not the line but the nub on the line that matters? That’s why I was beginning to think this last photo is what you meant?https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210307/97fbf903bba307ea27d846741f99f554.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BunnyGirl19]

Your last pic is what appears to be the partial nub. There’s leg or something obscuring more than just a piece of it, though.

[atomic sagebrush]

This is 12 weeks straight up we think?

[Jconger]

This is 12 weeks straight up we think?

Yes, according to my first ultrasound’s measurements... Saturday’s are my new week... so 12+0


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

That's too early. I can't give an accurate guess just yet, sorry!

[Jconger]

That's too early. I can't give an accurate guess just yet, sorry!

Boo ok. It looked like it might be going up so I was hoping an early boy guess [emoji23] https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210308/62240cb032501cd27a4553bd9cdca338.jpgAnything here?!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210308/c3e7a747160c7047ee8995fb28e4e509.jpg
Or anything here? I just don’t even know what we are looking at. i thought the really long white thing was it but then saw from other photos and websites it seems to be a skinny tube with something on the end... the thing on the end is what you look at being parallel or angled? And sometimes stacked?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Slingers]

Ok this is the nub though right? I think this is the best shot I got
https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210306/4cf886b8b549774a1e4f27b23443aea6.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

You didn't circle the right part here but I think a part of the nub is visible here. It is not clear but there could be stacking at the and. A little bulge at the end.

[Jconger]

You didn't circle the right part here but I think a part of the nub is visible here. It is not clear but there could be stacking at the and. A little bulge at the end.

Thanks for responding. Those last two photos do not show anything though is that right? I’m just trying to know where to even look. I feel like everyone else’s is so much more clear... is stacking for both genders though? I pretty much am not getting any clues from this is that right lol [emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Boo ok. It looked like it might be going up so I was hoping an early boy guess [emoji23] https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210308/62240cb032501cd27a4553bd9cdca338.jpgAnything here?!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

This picture does not have a nub. I am really not comfortable guessing but I'll go ahead, please keep in mind that this is NOT ACCURATE.

[atomic sagebrush]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210308/c3e7a747160c7047ee8995fb28e4e509.jpg
Or anything here? I just don’t even know what we are looking at. i thought the really long white thing was it but then saw from other photos and websites it seems to be a skinny tube with something on the end... the thing on the end is what you look at being parallel or angled? And sometimes stacked?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

The nub is straight and looks pink on this but at the same time it looks like there may be some stacking, which would be blue. There is just literally no way for me to guess gender here because the things I need to see are not developed yet.

[atomic sagebrush]

You didn't circle the right part here but I think a part of the nub is visible here. It is not clear but there could be stacking at the and. A little bulge at the end.

This stacking COULD turn into a penis and testicles or it could simply stay straight and be a girl all along. I really really really want to urge caution as there is literally no way to guess accurately on these

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks for responding. Those last two photos do not show anything though is that right? I’m just trying to know where to even look. I feel like everyone else’s is so much more clear... is stacking for both genders though? I pretty much am not getting any clues from this is that right lol [emoji23]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

It's not that it doesn't show anything, it's that it is too early and all babies look somewhat girlish at this point. All babies start off with things that look like clitoris and vagina and it's only once the Y chromosome wakes up and starts making testosterone that the penis and testicles develop. At 12 weeks straight up this process is somewhat underway but is not reliable to spot it on ultrasounds. There are a FEW babies, a minority, where you can see a ding-a-ling at 12 weeks. Most are not visible till the end of the 12th, even into the 13th week. I have seen some boys who I would have sworn were girls even at the end of the 13th week. So I don't like guessing too early because I don't like giving people false hope or causing them false despair with wrong guesses. Wrong guesses are worse than no guess at all and I just cannot tell from these.

[Slingers]

I don't like guessing too early because I don't like giving people false hope or causing them false despair with wrong guesses. Wrong guesses are worse than no guess at all and I just cannot tell from these.

That's so true. Guessing here is almost never only for fun. I hope you get your boy Jconger.

There is a lot of difference in scan quality also. Ik had a scan with my OB new machine and the images were so clear. It was amazing. You could count fingers and toes and see do much detail.

[Jconger]

Thanks so much atomic! That makes sense. I’m just grasping for straws here [emoji23][emoji23] this is so hard. I want to have hope but also protect myself... thanks for the input!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

That's do true. Guessing here is almost never only for fun. I hope you get your boy Jconger.

There is a lot of difference in scan quality also. Ik had a scan with my OB new machine and the images were so clear. It was amazing. You could count fingers and toes and see do much detail.

Thank you!! Yeah we weren’t using the best machine [emoji38]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jconger]

It's not that it doesn't show anything, it's that it is too early and all babies look somewhat girlish at this point. All babies start off with things that look like clitoris and vagina and it's only once the Y chromosome wakes up and starts making testosterone that the penis and testicles develop. At 12 weeks straight up this process is somewhat underway but is not reliable to spot it on ultrasounds. There are a FEW babies, a minority, where you can see a ding-a-ling at 12 weeks. Most are not visible till the end of the 12th, even into the 13th week. I have seen some boys who I would have sworn were girls even at the end of the 13th week. So I don't like guessing too early because I don't like giving people false hope or causing them false despair with wrong guesses. Wrong guesses are worse than no guess at all and I just cannot tell from these.

And you don’t believe in the skull theory right? The only thing you really go off of is the nub?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

I believe skull theory is possible (males and females do have differences in that regard) but it's too unreliable and the individual genetic variations and what the ultrasound tech has focused in on for me to feel comfy giving guesses on that basis very often.

[Jconger]

Ok Atomic, if and only if I was truly crazy enough to try ONE more time [emoji23] what would you have me do differently? I mean try for once lol. I just still can’t believe it hasn’t happened. I’ve always been a big lifter and not a lot of cardio... I feel like even though we didn’t get to sway I had made all of those changes for months before we fell pregnant. With Finley (our 3rd) you really felt we had a good sway. Maybe i am just destined to be a girl only mom... but wanted your thoughts. I just can’t believe I’m here again for the 5th time thinking “let’s try one more time! He’s gotta be in there” lol. Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Tell me everything you did with what you consider your best sway and I'll tell you what, if anything to tweak. This time you really didn't get a chance!

[Jconger]

Ok I gained 4lbs, continued to lift heavy, no cardio. We dtd like every day for 5 days. Never did that before around ovulation. Maybe we had a cut off? I know Friday was our last day of dtd. Sunday I had a positive opk. I wasn’t planning to ovulate until that following weds or Thursday. I had never ovulated that early before. We did use lubricant and I’ve always gotten up immediately following bding.

I cut the products out that you encouraged me to stop except 1/2 spark. Increased whole milk products and red meat. No meds or anything.

Maybe my hubby has low testosterone? Would that sway? He switched from putting his laptop on his lap to a lap desk.

I’m not sure what else? Maybe we only make girls.

I thought you were crazy to have five when we were trying for our third lol. Now here I am being crazy enough to think about a sixth! Maybe i just need to let go of this dream.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

When were the days of BD in relation to when you think you ovulated?

What lubricant?

Let's stay laying down 30 min. after sex next time.

Low testosterone may sway but we'll focus on what we CAN fix!

How long at a time were you lifting and how many days per week?

It's such a hard call to make to keep trying or not. I obviously got what I wanted, but not gonna lie, it was a hard road for a few years there (and my oldest two sons are significantly older, we had them when we were extremely young and then took a break for many years before we added the little ones). We're only just now coming out of the level of work and financial struggle of it all. At the same time, I knew some people from my time on InGender who decided to be done with their boys and move on, and they were posting pictures of margaritas on beaches and their fun family vacations and I have to admit it did make me question sometimes "did I really do the right thing". Obviously I would not trade my daughter ever, but it did come at a cost that everyone in the family had to pay, not just me. Less mom time, less money, less space in the house, etc.

I don't say this to deter anyone, but just to remind you guys that even when the dream does come true it's not without its drawbacks. :heart:

[Jconger]

Well I thought I wasn’t going to ovulate for another 6 days or so from our last bd. We bded every day for 5 days and then last time was Christmas (Friday). I first took a opk and it was positive Sunday night. I usually ovulate 36 hours or so after first positive but who knows if that would have been Saturday if I had taken it sooner?

This goes back to the timing thing... I’ve never waited 24 hours after a positive opk... which then makes me think timing might work [emoji23]

And it’s so tough. Four is a lot and I never thought about five until I saw several people I know have the opposite gender at five. We were done with three so five is going to be insane... I’m looking at all of these people on Instagram making me think maybe we try one more time. We are already way in over our heads... [emoji23] i don’t know.

[Jconger]

Oh and I lift 45 mins 3x p week


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Using timing is always your prerogative but I strongly recommend against using "timing" where you wait 24 hours after a positive OPK because that is not only possibly more pink friendly(since you can only fit in one attempt in many cases) but is also going to really cut odds of conception. Your call but that's my reservation with that method.

Just let me know how I can help!

[Jconger]

Using timing is always your prerogative but I strongly recommend against using "timing" where you wait 24 hours after a positive OPK because that is not only possibly more pink friendly(since you can only fit in one attempt in many cases) but is also going to really cut odds of conception. Your call but that's my reservation with that method.

Just let me know how I can help!

Thank you! I just can’t figure it out otherwise. I feel like we do everything that would help sway boy [emoji2372] what am I missing?!! Lol my midwife laughed at me when i said we should just try one more time


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[atomic sagebrush]

Here's the thing though. It doesn't ever come down to one thing. Whenever you're looking for "the reason" you're on the wrong track because even the things that sway the absolute hardest are maybe only adding a few %.

There appears to be a theoretical upper window on swaying - which makes sense, because Mother Nature always wants there to be SOME boys and girls conceived across the human population, so it has to come down somewhat to chance or else whenever there was a tribe or a village that had the same lifestyle, those people would have died out because no boys or no girls would be born! So this seems to be somewhere between 66-80% depending on how conservative one wants to be with the numbers. (meaning, I think that theoretically the upper limit seems to be 80%, but in practice real world we get about 66% for both boys and girls average over time) That's between 33-20% opposites just from sheer dumb luck.

Then this doesn't even take into account the idea that some of us are coming into swaying more "set" for girls vs. boys - we've had a whole lifetime of inputs to our body (as has our hubbies) that may not be able to be undone fully even in 12 weeks of swaying or whatever.

And, of course, that we may not have it all figured out yet, and in fact DON'T! So we're missing pieces of the puzzle.

Long story short, what can and indeed all but certainly DOES happen is that people can have great blue sways that end up producing a girl. If you have swayed from 66% likely to conceive a girl, to 66% likely to conceive a boy, that's a GREAT sway but it still can end up with a girl conceived. The solution to this is NOT then going back over your life assuming "well I'm obviously doing something wrong here" and then end up doing the opposite on things that were actually swaying BLUE!

It is not only possible, but indeed, common, for people to set out to "do the opposite" and end up undermining their sway considerably because they just can't wrap their heads around that it never was just one thing, thus you can't look at one thing (even if it's a ubiquitous thing like timing)

Some examples: "I always drank milk with my girls, so this time I'll drink nothing but almond milk". "I had lots of attempts with my girls, so this time I'll only have one." "I took prenatals with my girls so this time I won't take any." "I heard coffee (or alcohol, or soy foods) sways blue and I never had coffee with my girls so now I'm going to drink it by the pot" Etc etc etc, and this ends up with people going on to conceive even more girls because they're misdiagnosing why they have girls.

Again, you need to do the sway you are comfortable with, but I just want you to be aware of that pitfall and try not to think of swaying as "if only I figure out the ONE reason I had girls I can do the opposite of that" sort of thing!

[Jconger]

Here's the thing though. It doesn't ever come down to one thing. Whenever you're looking for "the reason" you're on the wrong track because even the things that sway the absolute hardest are maybe only adding a few %.

There appears to be a theoretical upper window on swaying - which makes sense, because Mother Nature always wants there to be SOME boys and girls conceived across the human population, so it has to come down somewhat to chance or else whenever there was a tribe or a village that had the same lifestyle, those people would have died out because no boys or no girls would be born! So this seems to be somewhere between 66-80% depending on how conservative one wants to be with the numbers. (meaning, I think that theoretically the upper limit seems to be 80%, but in practice real world we get about 66% for both boys and girls average over time) That's between 33-20% opposites just from sheer dumb luck.

Then this doesn't even take into account the idea that some of us are coming into swaying more "set" for girls vs. boys - we've had a whole lifetime of inputs to our body (as has our hubbies) that may not be able to be undone fully even in 12 weeks of swaying or whatever.

And, of course, that we may not have it all figured out yet, and in fact DON'T! So we're missing pieces of the puzzle.

Long story short, what can and indeed all but certainly DOES happen is that people can have great blue sways that end up producing a girl. If you have swayed from 66% likely to conceive a girl, to 66% likely to conceive a boy, that's a GREAT sway but it still can end up with a girl conceived. The solution to this is NOT then going back over your life assuming "well I'm obviously doing something wrong here" and then end up doing the opposite on things that were actually swaying BLUE!

It is not only possible, but indeed, common, for people to set out to "do the opposite" and end up undermining their sway considerably because they just can't wrap their heads around that it never was just one thing, thus you can't look at one thing (even if it's a ubiquitous thing like timing)

Some examples: "I always drank milk with my girls, so this time I'll drink nothing but almond milk". "I had lots of attempts with my girls, so this time I'll only have one." "I took prenatals with my girls so this time I won't take any." "I heard coffee (or alcohol, or soy foods) sways blue and I never had coffee with my girls so now I'm going to drink it by the pot" Etc etc etc, and this ends up with people going on to conceive even more girls because they're misdiagnosing why they have girls.

Again, you need to do the sway you are comfortable with, but I just want you to be aware of that pitfall and try not to think of swaying as "if only I figure out the ONE reason I had girls I can do the opposite of that" sort of thing!

That’s so good! Thank you! It also comes back to faith. Do I really truly believe that God creates? That He has a plan for these little people? Or that the world revolves around me, and I can make all my dreams come true [emoji23] Thank you for all of this! Perhaps i just need to adopt a boy [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] Thank you


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk