Regular unprotected sex and blue sway

[GoofyGurl]

Hi atomic,

Sorry if you've covered this question elsewhere but I'm just wondering as to how much having regular unprotected sex sways blue? The reason I'm asking is that DH was away for work for the past 2.5 months and we weren't able to include this in our sway. Based on what you've seen has this been a make it or break it sway tactic? DH is home now and I'm due to ovulate in the next week or so and wondering whether to go for it this month or hold off until next one. I guess I'm just curious how important this is to include.

Thanks in advance!

[atomic sagebrush]

We don't know. So much of this is theoretical, and we have no hard data to prove it. But what we DO know is that the majority of those of us with many boys do have regular unprotected sex all month long and only use protection in the fertile window.

The good news is, we do have hard data that indicates men who have been away at war and come home (even just home on leave) father more boys so you guys may have that "magic" working for you!

[GoofyGurl]

Oh thank you, Atomic! I am keeping my fingers crossed this is the case for us.

[GoofyGurl]

Another question Atomic... I'm due to get a positive OPK what I think will be tomorrow (today was almost there and I have a typical fade in and fade out pattern of OPK progression). I don't really care so much about timing and am wondering whether we should go for it every day for the next few days. We had an attempt yesterday at CD21, then will plan to have attempts right through til CD25. Should I wait for the OPK to get darker before we officially attempt?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's what most of us with all boys do! Go at it like bunnies in the fertile window! As long as you don't care about timing (which has been totally debunked) go for it!

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks Atomic! We had attempts CD 21, CD 22, on CD 23 we skipped as the OPK was reading the same as the last two days. Today on CD 24 it's very close to positive (more so than the last few days) so I think this one is it. Been having a lot of EWCM today too which is quite more than I had the last couple of days. So because I don't care about timing I'll have another attempt tonight, then again CD 25, CD 26 and CD 27. Do you think that sounds like a good plan? Should I also try to have multiple attempts on any of those days?

On another note, my ovulation seems delayed this month. Is there any risks with ovulating late or any impacts on chances of conception with late ovulation?

Thanks again!

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's great! Multiple attempts are fine if you can, but if not I'd not sweat it.

No risks from ovulating "late" (though you're still in really pretty much normal range, anything up to CD 35 quite frequently with good chances of conception). You can sometimes read people making claims that "late ovulation = bad egg" but that has all been debunked. Doctors were originally confusing the REASONS for delayed ovulation (such as PCOS or hypothalamic amenorrhea - losing ovulation from starvation) with delayed ovulation itself, and since PCOS and HA are associated with more losses for other reasons that have nothing to do with when you ovulate, there was some confusion. But that has been disproven and we now know that delayed eggs are still good ones - after all, they were in your body before you were born, a few more days don't make any difference LOL!

[GoofyGurl]

Good to know regarding late ovulation as I was a little worried! Thanks so much.

So we had attempts CD 21, 22, 24, 25 and 26. My OPK started fading out today on CD 26 and my very close positive was on CD 24. I'm wondering whether we're in the clear now in terms of attempts or whether we should have another one tomorrow? I feel like today is ovulation day. DH may not be home tomorrow so I'm wondering how important that attempt would be given the pattern we did above?

[atomic sagebrush]

Sorry I'm a bit late for this one but if YOU feel that you haven't ovulated yet you should always continue with attempts. You had great attempts but whenever it comes to pass that you think "I suspect this is O Day" or whatever and you can have an attempt I do suggest it. Obviously at some point the egg is gone, and if you're needing to not have an attempt then that's fine, but just err on the side of having an attempt if you believe you haven't ovualted yet. (or just have and the egg may still be alive)

[GoofyGurl]

Atomic! AF was due today and DH suggested I take a pregnancy test for fun just to see, as I don't feel any different than I normally do before AF and it was a BFP! I used the FRER tests and there is a clear second pink line, not faint at all but not as intense as the control either! This was our first month TTC and am shocked (but thrilled!) that it happened this quickly. Our attempts were somewhere like O-5, O-4, O-2, O-1 and O. I hope this was boy friendly enough! Although I don't temp, I do find that I have no EWCM on O day (that's really the only indication I have along with some mild cramping for a full day).

[atomic sagebrush]

NICE!

Many of us are noticing no CM on O Day and still getting boys that way! Good luck and FXFXFX for blue!

[GoofyGurl]

Hi Atomic, unfortunately this pregnancy has now ended in a loss at 5 weeks. I'm heartbroken. Do early losses impact a blue sway? Though at this point just a sticky bean is all I really want.

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh no I'm so sorry to hear this. :heart:

While we operate under the assumption that early losses sway, it's probable that it's really more later losses that do. I have personally seen plenty of boys conceived the cycle after a loss. I would go ahead if you felt ok with your diet and supplement taking.

[GoofyGurl]

Hi atomic,

I had a follow up with my Obgyn and he said that if I get pregnant in the next couple of months after my chemical that he would prescribe me prometrium? I'm so confused why I would need that as my pelvic ultrasound came out normal and even showed that I was ovulating again. The tech showed me on the screen too and said that I'd likely ovulate the next day, which would have been around CD10. I ended up ovulating around CD18 instead. I just don't understand why I'd have to be given prometrium when the doctor at the hospital said she saw no issues with me trying as soon as my cycle returned.

Any insight you have on this would be greatly appreciated!

[atomic sagebrush]

You don't need prometrium. There was an old school way of thinking where chemicals were supposed to be caused by low progesterone, and "trying too soon" might make you have another chemical, but BOTH those things were untrue. Chemicals happen because something has gone wrong and the pregnancy can't recover, and so your body drops progesterone to end it early (this is GOOD, and what we want to happen.) Some doctors continue to prescribe it on a "just in case" basis but it's really not necessary.

If you have ovulated and your ultrasound was normal that is a sure sign you do NOT need to wait. Your body has mechanisms that come into play to prevent conception when it can't handle a pregnancy and it is now believed that getting pregnant quickly after a loss is not only safe, but it may even possibly be beneficial. Back in the day doctors would have women wait MANY months before trying again; there was never any medical reason for this, but because doctors believed that women who had losses were mentally unbalanced and incapable of handling the stress of a pregnancy. But most of us find a subsequent pregnancy to be desirable and healing, and the studies have shown it is safe to try after a chemical.

I think you're running into some old school beliefs/practices here. Some women find this reassuring, as if they're doing everything to conceive again, but if you aren't comfortable wtih the prometrium you really don't need to use it if you don't want to. Your call.

[GoofyGurl]

Hi atomic, thanks so much. Do you have any insight as to whether vaccines can affect women's cycles? I got the covid vaccine and am now having the longest cycle ever - very irregular. It feels like my body is trying to ovulate but failing to - I'm currently on CD40! I ovulated around CD18 following my miscarriage so I assumed this crazy long cycle wasn't due to the loss, or can it be?? I'm just so confused as to what's happening with my body and am feeling discouraged as DH will be away again for work as of next month and not sure when we will be able to TTC after that. :(

[atomic sagebrush]

The Covid vaccine has been causing upheaval with menstrual cycles. From the first minute, before there were any official reports of this happening, people started coming to me and reporting this effect. At first I admit I was even a little skeptical but after about the 10th person in a row mentioned it, I kept my ears perked up and now there have been tens of thousands of reports of this effect. Interestingly, people have also noticed these changes happening just after having coronavirus. Something about the virus seems to make your period go nutty for a bit. Fortunately so far it's seemed to fix itself within three months' time (but please everyone, keep me posted about this so we can provide accurate information for everyone.)

At first, doctors were being very dubious about this happening in a sort of modern day "hysterical women" claim, but at long last it appears they're accepting it as a real finding. It is not "stress", it is not "hormones", it is not "your immune system" (if it was we'd see this happening regularly when you guys get normal everyday colds!) It's something to do with the way the virus works.

You can still ovulate and conceive even with this cycle weirdness. Ordinarily for blue I'd probably suggest skipping the month but since you aren't going to have the opportunity, I would keep doing OPK and having hubby release every 2-4 days, and go for it when you get that positive (hopefully very soon).

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks so much, atomic. I'm a little relieved to know that you've been hearing this from others as well and that it's temporary.

[atomic sagebrush]

Let me just be clear - we THINK it's temporary. The truth is they're only just now starting to study this and without a study I can't tell anyone how long it will be going on. My hope is that it's proven to be very short lived and thus far it has been on this site, but we are a small sample size really and not at all scientific.

[GoofyGurl]

Hi Atomic, just wanted to update in case it's helpful for anyone but I ended up getting my period on CD60! So essentially I skipped the month of September completely. I had my second shot the first week of September, three weeks after my first one.

We opted to skip this cycle, though I'm wondering when is good to resume TTC after a cycle like this? I'm sure the answer really isn't clear given the little we know about how covid in general impacts swaying. I'm willing to wait another cycle to see if the next one is more normal and then try again the cycle after that (if DH work schedule will allow it and he's actually home of course).

[atomic sagebrush]

Good heavens, I'm so sorry to hear that, I hope everything will be normal from here on in.

Yes, I just honestly cannot say. It all depends on how big a hurry you're in. I can definitely see the wisdom in wanting to wait it out for a (hopefully normal) cycle!

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks so much for the support. Quick question, I'm currently taking 2mg of folic acid, is that okay or should I be taking closer to the 1mg mark?

[atomic sagebrush]

I prefer that blue swayers take more like 2000 mcg throughout the entire first trimester, and then gradually wean back to the amount in a prenatal. If you really cannot bring yourself to take that much, wean back now to the maximum amount you feel comfortable with.

Some evidence indicates that slightly more folic acid or folate may help prevent chromosomal abnormalities in the egg, and of course it also helps prevent neural tube defects. Additionally many blue swayers are drinking green tea and other things that may deplete the body of folic acid or block its absorption. I myself conceived a boy with a neural tube defect eating a super healthy (non swaying, very blue friendly) diet plus a prenatal with 800 mcg, probably because I was drinking one single green tea every day (I didn't know better then). So this can happen even when you're taking a higher than normal amount of folic acid and not restricting food intake in any way, hence my recommendation.

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks so much Atomic. I don't mind taking the 2000mcg. My prenatal has 1000mcg folate and I've been taking an additional 1000mcg folic acid as well. So this is fine? Then once pregnant and nearing end of first trimester wean to the 1000mcg in my prenatal?

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's fine! Perfect! I would take the 1000 at a different time of day as the prenatal, so one in the morning, one at night, or whatever is convenient for you. That way you'll have more available over the course of the day for your body to use. Folate is water soluble and you'll just pee out anything you don't use.

[GoofyGurl]

Ah, okay thanks so much Atomic! I'll start taking it at different times. I've been taking them together purely out of convenience but will switch it up now that I know this!

I also read somewhere that you recommend pop sugar fitness so I gave it a try and really like these classes! I did a 20 minute full body workout but is there any specific one that you recommend or can I just pick whichever I feel like that day? When I conceived my DD I was doing classes like this but more like 4-5 times per week but they were for 60 minutes, clearly a lot more intense.

[atomic sagebrush]

Whichever ones you like are great! I usually do the ones by Anna (most are by Anna) because I just prefer her energy but there are lots of great ones available. That's one of the things I love about them is their variety, lots to choose from.

Yes the blue sway exercise is just often LESS than what you were doing before. Not different necessarily, just not enough to deplete you physically.

[GoofyGurl]

Okay, that's great to hear! Is there a number of them I should aim for each week? This past week for example, I did 2 pop sugar fitness classes (not on the same day), took a 40 minute walk, and did strength based yoga. These were all over 5-7 days or so. Is this the ideal amount and type of weekly exercise that I should be doing? I'm clearly doing exercises with body weight versus dumb bells, so not too sure if that's a problem. Thanks in advance atomic!!

[atomic sagebrush]

yes that's a great amount of exercise. I figure as long as you're spacing them out, even over 7 days and not doing a huge workout any given day that's all good.

Body weight is if anything better because you're less likely to get hurt and it's less fuss.

[GoofyGurl]

Hi Atomic,

Just an update, after the unusually long cycle post covid vaccine (60 days!), I just had a normal 33 day cycle, which is great! The bad news is that I'm on CD3 and normally ovulate somewhere around CD21 and I have now caught a cold from my toddler. Seems it's just been one bump in the road after another. I'm guessing this sways girl doesn't it if we go ahead this month assuming I get over this cold quickly?

[GoofyGurl]

Also - I'm mostly just congested so I'm taking Robitussin (guaifenesin only) and avoiding taking anything else. Hopefully that helps a bit for my blue sway.

[atomic sagebrush]

We assume it does but really don't have tons of info proving that.

It's your call to make on that. If you'll live 1000 lifetimes of regret trying and getting a girl, then wait it out, but at the same time the thing is you never know, next month may be worse and you may wish you'd tried this month! I have seen so many people skip a month and end up trying in a worse one that I generally err on the side of suggesting people try, for anything short of an act of God.

[GoofyGurl]

Me! That's what happened last month! I skipped last month as I opted to see if my cycle would return to normal (and it had) but then this month is WORSE! I'm on CD5 now and this cold really has gotten me good. I definitely regret not trying last month now but also it did give me relief to see a normal cycle post covid vaccine. I'm leaning towards skipping this cycle as it's been hard to keep up with the diet and exercise since catching this cold. I'm not even sure how being sick will impact ovulation either? Fingers crossed for January, I guess!

[atomic sagebrush]

Totally your call to make, and I agree your criteria for skipping this month makes sense. FX for a speedy recovery and also that your cycle stays normal.

[GoofyGurl]

So I actually ended up getting a positive OPK one day earlier compared to last cycle, despite having had a cold a couple of weeks ago. We ended up going for it as I've been holding out for a perfect month and nothing will ever be totally perfect anyway. So I'll likely be ovulating either tonight or early tomorrow. We've had two attempts already and am hoping to get in one more tonight! Will also try the following day but may not be feasible. I'll just be happy with 3 attempts!

[atomic sagebrush]

Excellent! Good luck and blue dust headed your way!

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks atomic. Unfortunately duty called and DH wasn't home tonight to have another attempt. I can attempt tomorrow night but my gut is saying it'll be too late by then. My OPK is now negative and likely ovulating tonight. So, I guess I'm in with 2 attempts from O-2 and O-1. We'll see how this plays out.

[atomic sagebrush]

There's no harm in having a try anyway in case O is delayed. But yes, probably too late. I got most of my boys with that type of attempt (and the others like O-3 attempt!) You got this!

[afya1]

Thanks atomic. Unfortunately duty called and DH wasn't home tonight to have another attempt. I can attempt tomorrow night but my gut is saying it'll be too late by then. My OPK is now negative and likely ovulating tonight. So, I guess I'm in with 2 attempts from O-2 and O-1. We'll see how this plays out.

Hey Goofy! Hoping everything goes well for you and you get your BFP, are you in the 2WW?

I’m also in a similar situation DH had to leave for a few weeks, we ended up BDing O-3, O-2 and O-1, Dh left early morning of my CB Peak and the opk strip was more darker! [emoji30] how many DPOs are you?

[GoofyGurl]

Hi afya! Yup, I'm in the TWW. My period is due in 3 days and I feel AF will show. I'm about 11DPO and took a digital test I had laying around which was a BFN. I guess it's a bit expected since I had a cold early in my cycle.

Ah, OPKs drive me nuts! I get that fade in and fade out pattern and like you some times I think I'm good, only to see another dark line the next day! I think you had great attempts though. Sending you lots of blue dust!

[afya1]

I honestly have low expectations for this month, as DH left right on the peak day, talk about good timing! Really trying hard to just relax.
Opks have made me crazy, I’m trying hard not to obsess over them.

Your not experiencing any symptoms?


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[GoofyGurl]

No symptoms at all. :( Fingers crossed next month is a better month for both of us! :)

[atomic sagebrush]

FXFXFX and blue dust!!!

[afya1]

Hey Goofy Gurl… were you able to POAS? Just checking in on you.


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[GoofyGurl]

Hi afya! I did yesterday and still a BFN. My period is due any time now. Fingers crossed for January! How are you?

[GoofyGurl]

Hi atomic, this might be a TMI question but I'm wondering whether "swallowing" has similar benefits as unprotected sex for blue? Given that DH schedule is unpredictable, some times it works out that he is home for let's say a week so we can have unprotected releases, but that week then happens to be the week I have my period (like right now)!

[atomic sagebrush]

We think it does!! I don't bring it up much but yes absolutely that is very likely helpful for all the same reasons unprotected sex is!

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks atomic. Willing to try anything that can help for our next try in January. Hope you and your family have a wonderful, safe and restful holiday season!

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you so very much - and same to you!!! Enjoy every moment!!

Let me know how I can help!

[afya1]

Hi afya! I did yesterday and still a BFN. My period is due any time now. Fingers crossed for January! How are you?

So far I have had BFNs, AF is due in about 2-3 days. Hopefully in January we are able to try again. Onwards and upwards. When will you be attempting?


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[GoofyGurl]

Oh, I'm sorry afya. Some times I think to myself it's easier to see AF instead of a BFN. I think next month I'll try to hold off testing until after AF is due! I'm on CD10 and normally my cycles are around 35 days so I get my first positive OPK around CD17-19. My DH has a very demanding and unpredictable work schedule so I'm just hoping he'll be home during my fertile window. Keeping my fingers crossed that 2022 will bring us both BFPs!

[GoofyGurl]

So... really hoping this is the month as DH was home the last few days so timing was perfect for us to have attempts! We've gotten attempts on O-2, O-1 (x2) and hoping to squeeze in one more attempt today. Next month won't be as relaxed with DH work schedule and very likely he won't be home during my fertile window so FX FX FX this cycle leads to a sticky BFP.

afya, how are you doing? I'm keeping my FX for you as well!

[atomic sagebrush]

:bluecheer: :bluecheer: :bluecheer: Woo hoo!!!!

[GoofyGurl]

Thanks atomic!! We managed to get another in today so that puts us at 4 attempts! I'm supposed to O today - I don't temp but I can tell it's coming because my CM has pretty much dried up, as it usually does on O day. So opted to have our last attempt sooner rather than later!

[atomic sagebrush]

Brilliant!!! Good luck and tons of blue dust headed your way!

[afya1]

So... really hoping this is the month as DH was home the last few days so timing was perfect for us to have attempts! We've gotten attempts on O-2, O-1 (x2) and hoping to squeeze in one more attempt today. Next month won't be as relaxed with DH work schedule and very likely he won't be home during my fertile window so FX FX FX this cycle leads to a sticky BFP.

afya, how are you doing? I'm keeping my FX for you as well!

Goofy you definitely got some promising attempts
In there. Really hope it’s your month. Soooo I was really laid back partly because DH was away he just got back on a Monday and CD1 was on New Year’s Day. I did an opk test on CD 9 it was a blank smiley on CB and for some Reason I didn’t test on CD10 the same day DH arrived, and ofc tired we didn’t dtd that night… I’ve been Oing on CD 15-16 for a few months and on CD 11 the morning LO AND BEHOLD I get a peak on my CB AND The opk test strip
Was blazing dark!!!!!!! I was so shocked never had this so that same night we DTD and the following night too, literally got 2 attempts in [emoji30][emoji30][emoji30][emoji30] so I’m just like whatever as I really wasn’t prepared this month. I still used preseed and mucinex but I don’t think we got good attempts in there.


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[atomic sagebrush]

I would keep doing attempts Afya in case the OPK was false positive!

[afya1]

I got a lot of EWCM, TMI it was stretchy and egg white and a lot of it, and my cervix felt a lot softer and higher back Monday and a couple days after that.. so I’m not so sure now we didn’t dtd after that [emoji30] DH isn’t so sure about us trying again.


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[atomic sagebrush]

Oh gosh well I'll keep my fingers crossed for good news for you!!!

[GoofyGurl]

Update... my period is due by tomorrow and I had a cheap dollar store test laying around so not as sensitive as CB or FRER but thought I'd just pee on it for fun. Well, looks like it's positive! It was a faint line but definitely not a squinter. I'm planning to test again in a week. Fingers crossed this is a sticky BFP! I had a strong line on a FRER the cycle I had a miscarriage so I'm not even going to bother with the FRER tests this time around and will just test again on a dollar store one a week after my period is due.

[atomic sagebrush]

AWESOME!! FXFXFX!

[GoofyGurl]

Hi Atomic! Just wanted to update that I had my anatomy scan today and my sway worked, we're having a boy! Thank you so, so much for all the support you provide through this site! I was preparing to hear girl so I'm still a bit shocked!

[atomic sagebrush]

OH gosh wow huge congrats!!! :bluecheer: :bluecheer: :bluecheer: