Atomic can you go over my sway

[drinaudo1990]

Hi atomic! I’m new to all this and am 8 months pp from having my little man! This will be our first month attempting to sway !

So far I’ve lost 10 lbs (somewhat of an le diet I haven’t been tracking due to a previous ED ) which leaves me around 22 ish BMI
Been doing the diet for 6 weeks
Im planning on abstaining for 12 days prior (hubby is 28) and one attempt at or right before positive opk.
Ph has steadily been 4.5 or lower

Anything I should change? Any tips? Also I take progesterone at 3dpo for a luteal phase defect should that effect anything?


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[atomic sagebrush]

Ok. When you do have that history of ED what we typically do is just have you go vegetarian without really dieting, and without tracking. What can happen (and all too often DOES) when you don't track, is that people cut back without really realizing it, till they're really not eating very much at all. BMI 21 is my cutoff point I want you guys to stop losing weight anyway, so I would just go vegetarian now at this point (and please use whole grains instead of white refined grains and sugary foods, and full fat dairy only, no skim or part skim dairy) and roll with that even if you end up not losing any more.

Why 12 days abstain per se?

Tell me more about your menstrual cycle and your luteal phase defect. Is this an ongoing thing?? Any tendencies towards PCOS?

[drinaudo1990]

I’ll be sure to make the diet changes .for the most part I’ve been vegetarian , but sugar has been an issue .Hubby is away so that’s the reason behind the abstain. For next month if we aren’t successful do you suggest a shorter abstain or FR? I’ve always had short cycles even before my son with spotting between, not any other pcos indicators that I’m aware of. My OB Prescribed me progesterone and that seemed to work the first month so I start them 3 dpo Thanks for your reply.


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[atomic sagebrush]

It's ok to have some sugar as long as you switch to mostly whole grains if possible. We're doing this more as a preventative and not because we know you need to do that, so if you need some sanity sugar carry on. Just as long as your diet is not based around sugar and white carbs.

Oh ok gotcha. If it was for that reason then no worries. I typically recommen 7-10 days abstain so I'd give that a go. I prefer abstain for men in your husband's age range because it's so much easier to pull off than the FR is - people mess up the FR all the time and it basically renders it pointless, so I like anyone who can abstain to do that to avoid the FR pitfalls.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes short cycles with spotting and a short LP doesn't really indicate PCO to me. May be an artifact of the history of ED. We need to be EXTRA careful that you are getting adequate fat intake - 50-60 g fat NOT counting the fat in fruit and veg. If you're willing I'd like to see you having a serving of full fat dairy every day, and 4-6 eggs a week if you eat them (otherwise just add in another serving of full fat dairy). Let's be sure your body has the raw materials you need to make progesterone and estrogen.

[drinaudo1990]

I figured abstain may be easier for to pull off as well lol. I’ve been avoiding eggs but I can add them back in for sure .I’ll make sure to add a few more veggies and stick with my full fat dairy, I do feel like I’ve been doing a lot of white carb stuff. I haven’t cut out breakfast because i tried and it was impossible for me personally . It’s interesting you said that because I have always thought my quick and sudden weight loss in the pass really messed up my hormonal balance unfortunately. Thanks for the advice


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[atomic sagebrush]

You can absolutely have some eggs. Not unlimited quantities but 4-6 a week plus whatever you use in cooking is absolutely fine.

Totally fine to eat breakfast if you need it. That's one little thing we do, yet for some reason people really overly focus on it even though it hasn't been outstanding results (just gets about the overall result of the diet as a whole - and we don't even know if it's adding anything beyond the diet itself.) If it makes it easier on you to have three evenly spaced meals, so be it.

[drinaudo1990]

Perfect thank you! I’ll keep you updated :)


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[drinaudo1990]

You can absolutely have some eggs. Not unlimited quantities but 4-6 a week plus whatever you use in cooking is absolutely fine.

Totally fine to eat breakfast if you need it. That's one little thing we do, yet for some reason people really overly focus on it even though it hasn't been outstanding results (just gets about the overall result of the diet as a whole - and we don't even know if it's adding anything beyond the diet itself.) If it makes it easier on you to have three evenly spaced meals, so be it.

So update here. I was going pretty good (6 weeks on the diet ) then a close family member passed and knocked me off my diet so I’ve been off 2 weeks) is that going to completely throw me off . Also my last attempt I abstained and had a two day cut off and didn’t get pregnant unfortunately any suggestions on what to do? Moving to peak? Add another BD? I conceived my son with two baby dances one at 4 day cut off and on o day ,


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[atomic sagebrush]

Oh gosh, so sorry to hear that.

In most cases when people think they've completely messed up diet, they really haven't. Can you explain why exactly you think you've blown the diet? If it's just eating certain foods or even going over a little bit we can recover from that without needing to take more time on diet.

How did you determine your 2 day cutoff? Sometimes what people think is a 2 day cutoff was actually much longer. The remedy may be to stick with one attempt just closer to O, but before we do that I want to be sure you actually HAD a 2 day cutoff first. :)

[drinaudo1990]

I’ve been eating over calories, meat and potatoes and it all with being away and snacking for about 2 weeks . Not really tracking and what not I don’t believed I’ve gained though . So I bd at 24 prior to my darkest peak so I believe it gave me a two day cut off .


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[atomic sagebrush]

If you haven't gained weight, I'm ok with you just regrouping and starting from here. It's your call as I can't know for sure how much you ate and how many nutrients your body absorbed really.

How close in relation to the FIRST peak?? Darkest peak is meaningless - I know there are now some apps on the market that make it sound like darkest peak means something, but it really doesn't. It's the first peak that matters, not the darkest.

[drinaudo1990]

So here’s the opks if it helps it’s cd 15 the one I circled under the one in yellow https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20210918/d7c7857f23f355d150e8995bd669d2f6.jpg

[drinaudo1990]

It’s tricky to because my progesterone is 550 a month in meds :( so im in a bit of a time crunch


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[drinaudo1990]

http://cloud.tapatalk.com/s/6146180420688/IMG_9784.jpg?


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[atomic sagebrush]

You BD CD 15, had your first peak CD 14. Surprisingly, his may have actually been too LATE, not too early. It takes you an average of 24-36 hours to ovulate after the FIRST peak, not the darkest, so if you ovulated CD 15 it may not have been enough time for the sperm to capacitate and make it to the egg.

The darkness of the tests (that is, once you have gotten a positive) really does not mean anything. You very likely had already Oed by the time you got that darkest peak, and if you ovulated more like 24 hours after the first positive you may have just not had enough time. So in future months I'd go off first peak, not darkest.

[drinaudo1990]

Interesting so I shouldn’t be going off the darkest but the closest to equal . It’s so hard to read them lol. I’m thinking this next cycle I will try at first peak opk


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[atomic sagebrush]

If you are in a hurry to conceive (and I would be, that's a FORTUNE in meds) would you want to consider going to every 4 day method? That way we sort of remove the uncertainty about the OPK.

[drinaudo1990]

It is a fortune :( so do you start baby dancing every 4 days from when ? Would you say it’s as affective as the one and odds to conceive quickly ?


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[atomic sagebrush]

Starting after your period ends you would have unprotected sex every 72 hours (some do 96 hours, but that is not going to boost your chances of conceiving much). NOT these hours specifically, this is just how you count the days - another way people think of it is "Monday/Thursday/Sunday/Wednesday", that kind of thing. Any time that day is fine.
Keep going with it till you're sure you've ovulated, even if that means going all the way through till the next cycle begins.

We are getting great results with the e4d, definitely in line with the one attempt (though most people who go to e4d have been on diet for 12 weeks or more, since we have everyone start off with one attempt). And it does really boost chances of conception because it both guards against early/late ovulation, and also introduces an element of randomness so if you're a person who really doesn't have a great chance of conceiving with one attempt at the first positive, or if THAT month you would have had a better chance a different day (always possible) you come in a day sooner or a day later and may have better chances of conceiving than you would have otherwise.

[drinaudo1990]

Sounds good thank you ! Hoping it’s our month


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[drinaudo1990]

Hi atomic! Planning for this month I just want to make sure I have this e4day thing correctly ! I plan on baby dancing

Tuesday sept 28th
Friday October 1st
Monday October 4th
Thursday October 7th

Do I have this correct this seems like e3days

I will still have to take an opk due to progesterone being started at the correct time but I do think this scheduling will make things a hell of a lot less confusing .


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[atomic sagebrush]

"Every four days" is a method of just having unprotected sex about four days apart. We do this either in the "72 hour pattern" or the "96 hour pattern".

The reason we call it every four days is that many people count it like this:

Day One - have sex
Day Two - skip
Day Three - skip
Day Four - have sex

While others called that "e3d". Using the terms "e3d, e4d, e5d" never worked because I could never be sure if what people were doing was actually being counted in the same way as other people were counting it. After having several people end up having way too many attempts and possibly even opposites, not to mention really screwing up our results by calling totally different patterns the same name, I put it all under the heading of "every four days", ditched any reference to three days or five days, and started using the e4d with the "hours" pattern.

Now, you may ask, why do I not just use the hours to start with, and that's because if I focus on the number of hours (which is NOT NECESSARY OR DESIRABLE) then people think it's some magic number of hours. They end up in a huge tizz over having sex 76 hours apart or 68 hours apart and that doesn't matter, it's just how you count the days. The hours do not matter at all. And calling it "Monday/Thursday" also didn't work because people then were scared to have sex on Tuesday or Friday and I ended up having to write these huge explanations constantly.

So while I know saying "e4d in 72 hour pattern" is confusing it's actually less confusing than any other way we've tried to describe all this, LOL.

[atomic sagebrush]

And yes, that is totally correct!

[drinaudo1990]

Thank you for the explanation lol just wanted to make sure I had my ducks in a row lol


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[drinaudo1990]

Hi atomic so I went back and looked over my chart from when I had my son and essentially I was doing the every four day type of thing . Do you still suggest that is my best option or would two attempts close together be a better option for me? I’m just afraid to do something so similar to what I did last time. I wasn’t doing the diet though . I had an attempt at cd 11 and cd15 (which I believed to be o) last time


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[atomic sagebrush]

Yes, I still recommend it. You got your son for other reasons than the number/pattern of attempts. None of these things are magic bullets; we all have dozens if not hundreds of things swaying in a particular way, so it is best to do what works best for most people most of the time instead of assuming that your body somehow works differently than everyone else's and doing blue sway tactics!

The trouble with "doing the opposite" is this: you can never be sure if the things you're "doing the opposite" on were swaying pink for you all along. So if you came into your first conception 80% likely to conceive a boy, and then did something that swayed 20% pink (which is a huge sway! Probably no one thing sways that much!) you could end up 60% likely to have a boy. You still had a great sway and really helped yourself out, but could have ended up still more likely to have a boy in the end. The answer then is not to do the opposite (because you'd undo something that had been swaying pink for you) but to stay the course and focus on things that were actually swaying blue, if that makes sense.

[drinaudo1990]

Sounds good thanks for your response !! I’ll keep you updated


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