Please see this post Atomic

[Sunflowers13913]

Hi I’ve been lingering on this site for a while and have finally attempted, I want to ask you for your opinion as I’m really nervous. I saw EWCM in the evening on Tuesday and we DTD, on Wednesday morning I saw peak on my CB test and we DTD again that evening. I have sharp pain on my right side and believe I ovulated today Thursday. Did I ruin my chances of TTC a boy? I read online that sperm die within 24-48 hours and I’m terrified that the Tuesday attempt sperm died and now the Wednesday attempt with less sperm fertilized the egg. What do you think? I appreciate any feedback please.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi!

First of all, 1 and 2 days before O are actually the highest chances of conception. So the Tuesday attempt was definitely in with a chance. I would have liked to see you have another attempt, be it on Wednesday or Thursday morning, or even Thursday night (and if there is any way to sneak one in this morning, I definitely would, because sometimes the egg comes later than we expect).

But I urge you to have another attempt NOT because the Wednesday batch of sperm would be smaller, but because then you'd have the three attempts we aim at when swaying blue. It actually takes 7-10 days of release every day OR VERY close releases back to back (within 6 hours max, and in most cases really more like 1-3 hours) to effectively lower sperm numbers, sperm recovers nicely within 24 hours
It wouldn't matter anyway because you're not doing the "One attempt at Ovulation" Shettles method anyway. Since you had two attempts you're just adding more sperm to what was already there. Yes, some of it will capacitate and die, but some of the first batch will stay dormant and then wakes up over the course of time to find the egg. So you will definitely have more sperm because of the timing of your attempts.

Also just so you know, one sided pain does not necessarily coincide with ovulation. O pain can happen before, during, and after ovulation, and the things that people think are O pain can be caused by LOTS of different things - the eggs themselves developing prior to O, irritation from the fluid that is released at the same time as the egg, which can last for a couple of days after O, cramping in the uterus and tubes to move the egg along, the ovary develops lots of eggs on both sides and after ovulation, has to reabsorb all of them making for a sore and swollen ovary. I myself just had sharp, stabbing, one sided pain all yesterday night and I am on my period right now!! I thought "this is the exact type of thing that people mistake for O pain!" I have seen soooo many people who tell me they know to the hour when they ovulated because of those sharp pains and then they're shocked when they have ultrasounds reveal that they had ovulated weeks before, or hadn't ovulated yet. I just don't want you to read too much into the timing of those pains because people will stop trying based on things that are not ovulation.

[Sunflowers13913]

Thank you so much for taking the time to give a detailed reply. I really appreciate it! I’ve been freaking out since Tuesday wondering if I just did this all wrong as this would be my last child. I really wonder if the pain for me happened after O, how is the cervical mucus supposed to be once ovulation has occurred? On Thursday after the pain it became thick and sticky. I wasn’t able to fit in another attempt due to my husbands work schedule I pray pray pray those 2 attempts will suffice. Do you think I have a good chance of having a boy based on your experience and what you’ve seen?

[onelittlewish]

Heyyy I know everyone is different but 2 attempts you def have a chance, at least that’s how I got both boys (1st boy a day before and on pos opk, 2nd on pos opk and the day after!) sending you all my blue dusts and Merry Christmas!

[Sunflowers13913]

Onelittlewish - Hi! Thank you, wow that’s good to know. Everyone around me only does one attempt and it’s the day they see peak OPK and that’s what’s been making me so nervous. Did you go off of cervical mucus or just OPK?

And thank you!! Sending you my pink dust!! Merry Christmas!

[onelittlewish]

I only go by OPK, I can tell by CM that I am in the fertile window but I don't know how to use that to pinpoint ovulation. First time was the first time I used OPK and thought we'd try. We got a high, had an attempt and then the next morning got the peak and thought wow that's fast and did again. We were travelling so there were no BD after that. I wasn't temping so I had no clue exactly on what date did I conceive. Second time around, I had been tracking for a few months after I got my pp period at 9m, just to see if I was ovulating and how my cycle looks like. We had two attempts only in that cycle on the day of pos OPK (O-2) and the day after (O-1). ff says I ovulated the day after my second attempt as I had a temp dip that day and a temp spike the day after so I think the O date was pretty accurate. That's why I am so scared to do 2 attempts in a row but I don't know if I can conceive with 1 only...so we will see!

[Sunflowers13913]

Ooo ok that’s good to know! I really hope my case is the same and I end up with a DS. This process is so hard and mentally draining. I know I’ll love the baby regardless but I just want to feel like I did my part completely and the rest is up to God. Is your attempt coming up? I have 2 girls and the first one I didn’t know about swaying and we were just DTD anytime of the month, with second DD I knew about swaying but we weren’t trying the month I conceived, according to the period app it had told me my ovulation date had passed so the week after DH didn’t use protection and I managed to get pregnant and I remember vividly that my cervical mucus was so thick so I didn’t think twice about the possibility of getting pregnant. I know from friends that they also got pregnant with their DD’s before ovulation occurred by a few days. I feel like when CM is thick that’s the best time to try for a girl. I also know a girl that has 2 boys and for her girl she had her husband release and then DTD 2 hours later days before ovulation and it worked. Wishing you the best of luck!!

[onelittlewish]

I totally feel you…sometimes I just feel that I will never have a girl and since this is also def our last child the pressure is suffocating from time to time. But you are right, we do our best and let God do the rest. I ovulated last Wed according to ff so I am currently 4dpo. Will be 10dpo on new year but I don’t know if I should test that early or just wait till af is late. This is my 4th cycle trying, we did 1 attempt, e4d then e4d+1 (so basically two attempts happened on pos opk and the fay after). I was super worried that it sways blue but I didn’t get pregnant. This month I am back to e4d and the two attempts fell on O-3 and O. My cm were pretty creamy on both attempts so I am actually more concerned about my chance to conceive (like the worst case scenario and without much fertile cm) so i guess if we do conceive this month the baby is meant to be! Do keep me updated and praying for a sticky bean for both of us ;)

[Sunflowers13913]

We’re literally in the same boat! FF says I ovulated last Thursday so I’m currently 3dpo. I’m currently contemplating testing next Friday as my next expected period is Jan 7. I feel like I most likely will just to get the guessing and feeling like I am out of the way. Your attempt sounds very good and creamy cm can definitely get you pregnant! I definitely will and you too! Praying!

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you so much for taking the time to give a detailed reply. I really appreciate it! I’ve been freaking out since Tuesday wondering if I just did this all wrong as this would be my last child. I really wonder if the pain for me happened after O, how is the cervical mucus supposed to be once ovulation has occurred? On Thursday after the pain it became thick and sticky. I wasn’t able to fit in another attempt due to my husbands work schedule I pray pray pray those 2 attempts will suffice. Do you think I have a good chance of having a boy based on your experience and what you’ve seen?

At SOME point after ovulation, yes, the CM becomes thicker and sticky. This actually takes longer than some people claim. Some of us are noticing EWCM for 1-2 days after O has occurred and then it's also very common to see a resurgence of EWCM 6-8 days after O.

But I don't think you're understanding what I'm saying about O Pains. What we THINK are O pains are caused by many different things, some of which happen after ovulation. So it wouldn't necessarily be related to when your EWCM dried up anyway. Your tubes could be cramping, your ovaries reabsorbing unused eggs, etc and this can cause pain that people think is O pain when it isn't.

I actually got most, possibly all my boys with two attempts. The three attempts is because we saw such blue-friendly results with three attempts among PINK swayers (when people had three attempts they still had 60% BOYS even with full on pink sways, so we started doing that for blue swayers too) But many blue swayers only get two attempts in and still get boys.

[Sunflowers13913]

Ooo ok I understand what you mean. That’s helpful to hear, hopefully that’s the case with me. Thank you for taking the time to respond!

[Sunflowers13913]

Do you think there’s any reliability for the sneak peak test? And what do you think about the Ramzi theory?

[atomic sagebrush]

I do not recommend Sneak Peek after having seen lots of people get the wrong results with it. If you MUST do it, the one in the lab is better but even that is not terribly reliable. Do not bother at all with the at-home one.

The Ramzi "Theory" has not proved out for us. Dr. Ramzi never published his "findings" for independent review, which is a huge red flag, and if it worked, since it's so well known, every ultrasound tech and IVF clinic in the world would be using it by now. They don't, because it doesn't work. As if that wasn't enough, I have personally seen several people send Dr. Ramzi their ultrasounds with $10 and he guessed WRONG! :p

[Sunflowers13913]

Oh wow I’ll definitely opt out of the sneak peek test than. That makes sense about the Ramzi theory, they really would be using it to determine everywhere. Thank you!

[atomic sagebrush]

Good! That at-home Sneak Peek test is garbage and a huge ripoff.

[Sunflowers13913]

Onelittlewish - Did you get a bfp this month!!

[onelittlewish]

Hey! Thanks for checking in...well I don't know what to think! I had a very vivid dream that I got 2 strong lines on 31st so I did test on 1 jan with my smu (10dpo) and saw a very very faint line but definitely there. My temp looked good, got a dip at 5dpo then spiked, and got another dip at 7dpo and spiked again so I thought, yay! Then the next morning at 11dpo I tested with fmu, bfn. My temp dropped abit. This morning at 12dpo fmu & smu, negative. Temp dropped further but still above cover line but I think I am out. I also got a faint line last month and Atomic said it might be some sort of ghost line so this is probably what it was again. My AF is expected tomorrow I feel quite defeated but oh well...how about you? Did you test yet?

[Sunflowers13913]

Oh wow! I thought when you see a faint line it means it’s positive and your set! How interesting. I should probably test again than :/ lol I took a test yesterday at 10dpo with first response and I saw a faint line! Called my OB today and made an appointment I’ll take another one tomorrow with fmu! I didn’t temp this cycle even though I probably should’ve. I’ve tried in the past and the temps were all over the place Bc my LO still wakes up but I’ll keep you posted!


Update: I got impatient and figured I had 2 tests left so why not test right now and it still shows a faint line on the first response test. Do you remember with your boys if you got a positive test sooner or later?

Hoping you get a pink sticky bean next month!!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Re faint lines - the past couple years we are being plagued by these faint lines that never progress. We are seeing them even in people who had not ovulated yet so it's likely that they are not real positives and are some sort of manufacturing defect.

[Sunflowers13913]

Hi Atomic! Should I wait than till my period date to test again and make sure it’s progressed?

[atomic sagebrush]

If you have simply a very faint line barely darker than a ghost line, then yes, you must test again after a missed period. The tests have simply not been reliable with faint pos.

[onelittlewish]

Oh wow! I thought when you see a faint line it means it’s positive and your set! How interesting. I should probably test again than :/ lol I took a test yesterday at 10dpo with first response and I saw a faint line! Called my OB today and made an appointment I’ll take another one tomorrow with fmu! I didn’t temp this cycle even though I probably should’ve. I’ve tried in the past and the temps were all over the place Bc my LO still wakes up but I’ll keep you posted!


Update: I got impatient and figured I had 2 tests left so why not test right now and it still shows a faint line on the first response test. Do you remember with your boys if you got a positive test sooner or later?

Hoping you get a pink sticky bean next month!!!

Yay! It looks like congratulations are in order! So happy for you!

Yea I really don't know what is going on I never got any faint lines before only when I was preg with my DS2 but the line got significantly darker the next day. Always thought a line is a line and experiencing this 2x in a row devastating. I planned not to temp but then I hate the guessing game and having false hope so still did and I am glad that I did. Temp dropped again but still above coverline, probably expecting AF tomorrow.

With my DS2 I was ttc so I got my very faint line on 8DPO and a very obvious pink line the next morning at 9DPO. I had bloodwork done that afternoon and my HCG level was 37. With my first I didn't test with the super sensitive ones, just normal home test and I tested positive on the morning of my missed period (negative the day before). I wasn't really seriously TTC so no clue what DPO was I on. Probably 12-14ish. So can't really compare but my DS2 was early for sure.

[atomic sagebrush]

There is something going on with the tests lately. So back in 2019 when you were pregnant with your second son that was prior to us noticing this and the faint positives seemed reliable at that time. It is either some sort of issue with manufacturing due to the pandemic, or they (and this happens all the time) came up with some way to make the tests more cheaply and it's become industry standard, as several different brands have been giving us this issue.

My advice to everyone reading this is a) don't test too early and b) don't believe in ghost lines. I have always been very very hesitant when you guys are testing 8 DPO and getting excited over very faint lines so none of this advice is new, but I just can't ever seem to get people to stop doing this (and I understand, it's exciting to know as soon as possible, but it creates far far more heartbreak and it is not worth the excitement for 2-3 days of knowing a bit sooner.) But even if people have ignored me in the past, please listen here and now because until this anomaly with the tests is cleared up, it's really REALLY causing heartbreak for people.

[Sunflowers13913]

Thank you! I tested again on the day of my pissed period and it gave me 2 dark lines. I have an appointment with my OB when I’m 8 weeks! To be completely honest, I’m extremely nervous. I just don’t know if I did all that I could to make me feel 100% in my sway. I was on the diet for months and took supplements but of course this cycle ended up being different as I usually only have EWCM on the day of ovulation but this time I had it the day before. I’m trying to mentally prepare myself that this will be a girl the only thing that says boy for me is the Chinese gender calendar but I hear that’s like flipping a coin. Lol

I’m hoping you get a pink sticky bean on your next attempt!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Nice! Excellent!!

I always have EWCM that dries up before O and I have four boys!

Think of it this way - if the Chinese had any ancient wisdom that could prevent a baby's gender there would not be orphanages full of unwanted baby girls. :( The CGC is just nonsense and we've done soooo many polls and threads on it and it's always 50-50.

[Sunflowers13913]

Thank you so much Atomic!! Yes that is why we even DTD was because of the EWCM, or originally I would’ve DTD morning of ovulation and evening and the next day. Do you think I have a high chance of conceiving a boy? So we DTD in the evening day before ovulation and the next day evening (Day of ovulation). If you don’t think so please tell me honestly based off of your experience and what you have seen, I would rather have myself prepared mentally

[atomic sagebrush]

I can't tell anyone's chances of having a boy, but I think having attempts the day before O and the day of O is wayyyyy better for blue than having an attempt day of O and after O (which has no chance at the egg and does not count as attempt).

Good luck and blue dust!

[Sunflowers13913]

Ok thank you!! Fingers crossed for a healthy blue bundle!! xx