Swaying again!

[Girlswaydreamer]

Hi everyone. I am coming back for my second sway..
I have two little boys aged 2.5 and 14 months. I’m desperate for a little girl! I swayed for my second baby, I did one bd at peak, intermittent fasting, a vegan diet, walked for exercise and lots of coffee. So I’m really unsure what I can do improve my chances of having a girl.
I was also vegan with my first baby and again only one bd with him.
I have seen so much about baby dust and also a cosmic sway, I’m finding it all overwhelming and I really want to get it as right as possible as this is defo last baby I think!
Does anyone have any advice?
Thank you!!

[Blckhrt]

Welcome back. I’ve also had a boy with 1 BD near (actually before) peak + a vegetarian diet w/coffee and alcohol. First thing that comes to mind is: were you taking prenatals or any other vitamins besides folate? I personally feel that makes a big difference!

[Girlswaydreamer]

Hey! Thanks for replying. I was only taking folate, nothing else! I feel like it was a good sway so I’m not sure what I could change really.. other than timing? Or this cosmic stuff but it gives me a headache haha

[Thefinalcountdown]

What was your diet like? Sometimes vegan can still be really high in nutrients like protein and fat (nuts/ beans/ oils/ anything processed) with my girls I was on a whole food plant based diet- so mostly veggies and some fruit, no nuts/ seeds or oils. Also drinking a lot of almond milk with coffee and no breakfast ever. With my boy it was the same diet but I was doing strength training, didn’t have the almond milk and only drank a tiny amount of cold brew. Also with the girls I would have coffee with sugar in the morning then not really anything till dinner except some veggies or fruit so my blood sugar would go up and down alot during the day whereas with the boy I didn’t have much fruit except blueberries after dinner. Good luck!


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[Blckhrt]

It may well have been a pretty perfect sway! But there will always be a percentage of women who will get opposites. Unfortunately for us!

[Thefinalcountdown]

That’s true! I’m swaying blue for this one!


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[Girlswaydreamer]

My diet did have a lot of processed food but I also eat quite healthily so maybe there were too many good things in it. I was just looking at the sway stats and saw cal/mag had a 70% success. Is this recommended? Thank you x

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi and welcome!!

I can immediately put your mind at ease regarding the "cosmic sway" - magic and mysticism does not work. I have a full debunking against the Jonas method here:

https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/82278-can-someone-please-explain-sun-moon-affecting-girl-sway-help.html?highlight=jonas+method

And here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/82045-lunar-method-dr-jonas-experiences.html?highlight=jonas+method

and here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/82032-trying-perfect-my-girl-sway-3.html?highlight=jonas

Babydust "method" (using the term loosely, because it's theft + old debunked stuff) stole our one attempt, and tried to combine it with the old debunked Shettles timing. People are going many months, if not years not conceiving with that approach, and from what I am told, not only do they have lots of opposites, but people are trying to add their opposites to the Facebook results and are not having their posts approved. You can absolutely still combine timing with one attempt, though, and we have people on here doing that all the time! Happy to help people use timing if they want to, even though I don't believe in it (four of my five kids were timing opposites and that is the case for tons of people on this site.)

Can you tell me more about your 'vegan diet' you were following?? We are seeing better results with a non-vegan approach after people have had an opposite on a fully vegan diet. Vegan diets can be extremely carby (particularly if you weren't following the macros for protein, fat, and calories) and for some of us, too many carbs can raise blood sugar, testosterone, and inadvertently sway blue. We have a lot of success with followup sways after a sway opposite, following a somewhat lower carb, nonvegan diet (which is still lower fat and lower protein). Or, if staying vegan is important to you, I have tricks we can use that will help you still get fewer carbs even on a vegan diet.

If you give me more info about diet specifics and then anything else that occurs to you I can be of more help!

[atomic sagebrush]

My diet did have a lot of processed food but I also eat quite healthily so maybe there were too many good things in it. I was just looking at the sway stats and saw cal/mag had a 70% success. Is this recommended? Thank you x

The nutrients overall, and portion sizes, really do matter. I think we can work on diet and get you a better shot next time through.

I do not recommend cal-mag. The best study ever done on maternal preconception diet and gender conceived (and the ONLY one not selling some method of gender swaying) found that women who conceived boys had more intake of ALL nutrients including cal-mag. Some people do still choose to use them, but the cal-mag is simply piggybacking on the overall results of the site (which are 70%) and are not adding anything. We have not emphasized the cal-mag for years now and our results are higher than ever. Personally, I got my daughter after dropping the cal-mag, after my 3rd and 4th boys where I was taking it.

[atomic sagebrush]

Hey! Thanks for replying. I was only taking folate, nothing else! I feel like it was a good sway so I’m not sure what I could change really.. other than timing? Or this cosmic stuff but it gives me a headache haha

The cosmic stuff is nonsense and what's worse, it will make you SOOO control freakish that it will actively HARM your sway while doing absolutely nothing, since magic is not real.

While I do think we can tweak some things in your diet, keep in mind that if swaying was ever a 100% guarantee, the whole human race would have died out a long time ago. We do see about 20-30% opposites (depending on tactics used, and people's dedication to making changes) even with pretty close to ideal sways. Sometimes you can do everything perfect and then simply have bad luck, and so when swaying again, we have to be careful we don't inadvertently change things that were actually swaying pink for you!

In other words, for all any of us know, you got to 80% pink friendly (which is the theoretical upper limit of what we can get with swaying, since we've never seemed to breach that percentage) and then just had bad luck and fell into the 20% opposites. That was still a great sway, and it wasn't that you did anything wrong, but it just didn't work out this time.

[Girlswaydreamer]

Hi atomic, thank you so much for all of this info and taking the time to reply.
So with both boys I was fully vegan, strict! And I ate a lot of potato, pasta, bread.
At the moment I am eating eggs and fish, that’s probably the only thing that has changed about my diet. I’m happy to eat eggs and fish but really wouldn’t want to eat chicken and other meats. I’m not currently doing fasting at the moment and I’m also snacking a lot. I weigh about 60kg and am 5’7 my bmi is 21, i actually was ahout 56kg when I conceived both boys too so a lot lighter! I’ve just finished breastfeeding so I wanted to wait till September time to start actively trying.
Is the 70% success stats just a coincidence with the cal/mag? Im not currently taking any supplements
I’m really really wanting this sway to work so do feel nervous about it all! I’m not sure what else to change. Really appreciate all the help!!

[atomic sagebrush]

Ok. So what we're having people do is that once they've had a failed sway when eating a lot of carbs, is to switch to our "alternate diet" where you focus on whole grains, fruits, and vegetables, cut out white carbs and sugars as much as you can. NO SKIM DAIRY, have full fat dairy only. Skim and even part skim milk is really terrible for blood sugar and testosterone.

You don't need to eat chicken or meat, as long as you can have dairy, eggs, and fish. I would not have fish more than 3 times a week max (not for the sway, but because of the risks of mercury). You can get protein from soy (2-3 times a week) grains, nuts, beans and legumes, and have no need of chicken or other meat. We just want you to not go overboard with simple carbs because for some people, too many of them can sway blue.

You'd need to stick in the limits of the overall LE Diet - 1500-1800 cals, 50-60 g protein and fat, and we don't count the pro and fat in fruit and veg at all, and low carb veg, we count nothing in them, not even calories. Low carb veg are free and unlimited.

Yes, the stats on cal/mag are just a coincidence. We are not doing a study here, so everyone does lots of things all together. The overall success rate is 70%, so we have a lot of sway tactics that are at about 70%, but they aren't necessarily doing anything. When researchers DID test what women were eating before getting pregnant, women who ate the most of all nutrients had the most boys.

Now, some people do still choose to take cal-mag. I leave that at your discretion, but honestly after getting two boys myself with cal-mag, I always hope that people skip it! If you do want to take it, just be sure you're avoiding the Vitamin D that people sometimes take along with it.

Are you planning to exercise this time?

[Girlswaydreamer]

Thanks atomic that sounds great. I’ll try that diet instead, does my husband need to follow a diet?
I’m going to start exercising yes, it will probably be mainly walking as I generally always have the kids with me!
Are supplements recommended for my husband? I’ll avoid the calcium and magnesium then!

[Girlswaydreamer]

Also sorry are diet drinks/ coffee and alcohol still recommended on this diet? As well as fasting?

[atomic sagebrush]

Husbands don't need to do the full on diet, but many people are having their husbands go vegetarian or even fully vegan. This may help. Some are also adding in soy milk 12-48 ounces daily.

Walking is fine! Just be sure you do 60 minutes, as that's been best for pink.

We have been giving husbands (provided he has no medical situations or drug interactions) 500-1000 mg olive leaf extract and the soy milk. A few guys also took fiber but overall I don't think it's important for them as it is for you. Be sure he weans off it when it's time to stop taking it.

[atomic sagebrush]

Also sorry are diet drinks/ coffee and alcohol still recommended on this diet? As well as fasting?

Diet drinks are at your discretion. I do not believe they sway pink at all, and in fact I've seen a preponderance of boys in the people drinking insane amounts of them (I am not sure they actually sway blue, and please no blue swayers reading this drink diet drinks at all ever, but more that the types of people who are willing to put aside all reason and drink insane levels of aspartame are the "control freakish" people more inclined for boys anyway.
But there's also the idea that autoimmune diseases may sway blue and some think artificial sweeteners may aggravate those)

Coffee and alcohol are definitely both recommended and we've had good luck with them.

I like you guys to eat 2-3 meals a day (both 2 and 3 are fine and acceptable) and then a few people need to go up to 4, esp. at the start. No snacking and try to go 12-16 hours overnight without eating if possible.

[Girlswaydreamer]

Thank you ! Do I need to take fibre supplements? Or any others?
And do I still try to consume alcohol/diet drinks and coffee?

[atomic sagebrush]

Most people do take fiber, just the lowest dose with any meal containing fat (if you're not eating fat you dont' take the fiber). Be careful if you start losing weight really fast though.

You'd need to take folic acid or folate too - I typically recommend 1200-1600 mcg daily. Take this thru the entire first trimester and then gradually wean off by spacing doses further and further out till down to one per week, then you can drop them.

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh and yes I'd absolutely do alcohol and coffee. We allow those on our alt. diet.

[Girlswaydreamer]

Thank you so much. You are SO helpful! Do you have a resource page for the alt diet? And how long before attempting should husband start taking his olive leaf? Thank you.

[atomic sagebrush]

I do, just scroll down thru the first few posts, the diet info is a few down from the top: https://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-general-discussion/9052-swaying-under-special-circumstances-part-3-pcos.html

And you may also find this helpful:https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-a-girl-best-practices/1865-swaying-under-special-circumstances-part-1-blood-sugar-issues.html

And our alternate diet support thread is here, have lots of good ideas in it: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-to-conceive-a-girl/47264-le-diet-pcos.html