applesoup
March 4th, 2012, 10:36 PM
Trying to keep this short, but could REALLY use opinions.
I found out that after 3 boys, I'm being blessed with a little girl. So excited, as you can imagine. In my perfect mind, I'd love to have a bright pink shower with pink cupcakes & balloons--and everyone who's excited for me. 1 giant party. It won't happen.
In realty, things are much more difficult. I have no friends...well, my best friends have all moved out of state. My current "friends" are more like acquaintance friends on facebook. We talk & see each other, but never hang out & I'd feel weird asking them to bring me a present. My best friend asked to throw me a shower (she lives an hour away) but I told her no because I didn't know who to invite?
Which leaves me with family. My mom & step-mom are horribly awkward around each other, so I hate to have a shower with them together. My mom + 2 sisters are holding a private lunch @ my mom's house in June. Which I'm blessed to have, no matter how small.
Which leaves me with his family...who's starting to harass me about a shower. DH's sister #2 has had major fertility issues this past year & was...unexcited, at best, to hear that we were pregnant--especially with a girl. I've seen her 1x & she didn't acknowledge or talk about the pregnancy the whole time. She didn't tell DH congrats & will only talk about it in passing with him...since they work together. My MIL asked if someone was throwing me one--I told her my friend offered & I declined...and told her not to do one. Then, she tells DH's sister #1 that information & SHE writes me to ask if she can throw a shower/lunch for me... with just:
1. Sister #2 (who isn't excited for me)
2. Herself (who wasn't excited for pregnancies 1-3 since she had previous fertility issues)
3. MIL: who told me before I found out DS3 was a boy that we "need more girls in our family" and that I should have a girl. Boy was she bummed & fake "happy" when I announced DS3.
The last thing I want to do is celebrate with people who weren't excited for me when it was a boy--truth be known, I probably NEEDED a shower the most with DS3. I can be excited for a girl...I couldn't be excited for DS3 since they weren't. I don't want to celebrate with people who haven't even acknowledged my pregnancy, let alone said congrats--and that goes for DS's sister #1 too (who's wanting to throw the shower), because she treated me the same way (as DS sister #2) with my other pregnancies.
I feel bad turning down parties...because I DO want to celebrate & have a PINK party. At the same time, I hate awkward parties, where people show up out of obligation.
Did I do the right thing, or should I let everyone hold tiny showers for me all over the place?
Thanks for any opinions...
I found out that after 3 boys, I'm being blessed with a little girl. So excited, as you can imagine. In my perfect mind, I'd love to have a bright pink shower with pink cupcakes & balloons--and everyone who's excited for me. 1 giant party. It won't happen.
In realty, things are much more difficult. I have no friends...well, my best friends have all moved out of state. My current "friends" are more like acquaintance friends on facebook. We talk & see each other, but never hang out & I'd feel weird asking them to bring me a present. My best friend asked to throw me a shower (she lives an hour away) but I told her no because I didn't know who to invite?
Which leaves me with family. My mom & step-mom are horribly awkward around each other, so I hate to have a shower with them together. My mom + 2 sisters are holding a private lunch @ my mom's house in June. Which I'm blessed to have, no matter how small.
Which leaves me with his family...who's starting to harass me about a shower. DH's sister #2 has had major fertility issues this past year & was...unexcited, at best, to hear that we were pregnant--especially with a girl. I've seen her 1x & she didn't acknowledge or talk about the pregnancy the whole time. She didn't tell DH congrats & will only talk about it in passing with him...since they work together. My MIL asked if someone was throwing me one--I told her my friend offered & I declined...and told her not to do one. Then, she tells DH's sister #1 that information & SHE writes me to ask if she can throw a shower/lunch for me... with just:
1. Sister #2 (who isn't excited for me)
2. Herself (who wasn't excited for pregnancies 1-3 since she had previous fertility issues)
3. MIL: who told me before I found out DS3 was a boy that we "need more girls in our family" and that I should have a girl. Boy was she bummed & fake "happy" when I announced DS3.
The last thing I want to do is celebrate with people who weren't excited for me when it was a boy--truth be known, I probably NEEDED a shower the most with DS3. I can be excited for a girl...I couldn't be excited for DS3 since they weren't. I don't want to celebrate with people who haven't even acknowledged my pregnancy, let alone said congrats--and that goes for DS's sister #1 too (who's wanting to throw the shower), because she treated me the same way (as DS sister #2) with my other pregnancies.
I feel bad turning down parties...because I DO want to celebrate & have a PINK party. At the same time, I hate awkward parties, where people show up out of obligation.
Did I do the right thing, or should I let everyone hold tiny showers for me all over the place?
Thanks for any opinions...