Looking for help to make a fast sway, especially from UK ladies

[Gentle]

Hi all - new to this site today and have been reading everything with fascination and some horror: we are going to TTC#3 swaying for a girl next cycle. I just Od so that gives me around 30 days to make major changes! I have so many questions, my head is spinning, but I will try to filter them.

So, what is best to focus on short-term to make the biggest difference to my odds?

How much should I investigate getting rid of ewcm? I get quite a lot!

Is it realistic to make any difference in such a short time? I know I won't definitely conceive this cycle, but I'd like to have done our best just in case we do!

On the girl diet, what products do you (if you are in the UK) stock up on?


Some background:
I'm prepared to follow a really strict diet - I'm very overweight so losing weight fast would be very welcome, and probably not too hard, because a lot of the weight is directly coming from PND (under control now) and comfort-eating (not yet under control!) and I am totally leaning towards a boy menu usually. I want a little girl more than I want comfort right now, so extremely motivated (but in need of cheerleaders). I'm still breastfeeding ds2 (nearly 10mo) but only 4 times a day and he eats plenty of solids. Obviously I don't want to take anything that will cause him any harm, but I'm not worried about reducing my calories on his account.

My cycles are reasonably predictable if long - O between CD19 and 22 and LP of 12-13 days. I have a really clear O indicator through ewcm but I've been using OPKs too as I'm insecure about failed O. Ewcm has really increased since ds1 - I was really pleased about that because it took us 2 yrs and 3 mc to have him. I have PCOS and it was acupuncture I believe that eventually sorted out my cycles so we could conceive him. We had one mc in between him and ds2 as well.

I take a pre-natal multi-vit and have stock of calc/mag and cranberry. Dh is on board and will take supplements if I organise it all for him!

Thanks all - off to read more about your sways and the science and so on now - fab site!

[mydream]

Hi and welcome! I am surely not an expert but the women here really know their stuff
I would say to focus on the LE diet as a top priority- skipping breakfast, low fat , low nutrients etc.
The next thing I would say is to decide what you want to do in terms Supplements
Then Choose your timing method which will then lead you to if you want to use Rehresh etc.
Hope this helps. Try to break it up into those parts to start. Good luck!!!!

[rainbowflower]

welcome!
I'd give the LE diet a try - start it ASAP. I think a month is cutting it close to being too short, but then you might not catch the first egg..

there is a topic about good products in the UK here: http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-conceive-girl/3489-uk-ladies-lets-help-each-other.html
I REALLY liked Sainsbury's frozen golden rice as that's delicious but only has a trace of sodium

if you have a lot of CM you'll want something to dry it up (an antihistamine), but you might find you also get less naturally once you start the diet... but if you're BF it might dry your milk up, so you might want to give it a miss and hope that you lower the pH of your natural EWCM instead

your DH will want to use frequency to lower his sperm count - either daily releasing, or abstaining for at least a week. How long did it take you to conceive DS2? if it was quite a while you'll probably want to BD a couple of times through OV, so FR might be a better choice for you

you could also use a vaginal gel like RepHresh to lower your pH. You can buy it on Amazon, not sure if Boots sell it or not

don't take the multivitamin - those sway blue. The latest theory is that having more nutrients means your body is in a better condition and as a result will make it think that the "riskier" gender to carry in pregnancy is a better bet (i.e. boys)




hope that helps?

[atomic sagebrush]

It is totally possible to make a difference in a short time.

RE EWCM - if you take antihistamine (cetirizine) for 5 days leading up to O or whenever you have EWCM, whichever is longer, that will help keep CM under control. If you still have CM at that point, you can also take a diphenhydramine 1-2 hours before your attempt(s). NOTE - since you are BF, this may dry up your milk too much. I would limit this to taking antihistamine the day of attempt only and would not take BOTH at the same time.

I would also have you use a jelly such as RepHresh to lower the pH of semen and also any CM that happens to make it out.

30 days of diet is actually not too shabby really. It won't do a lot for hormone levels, but it helps, and can help bring pH and blood sugar down as well. With PCOS, you will want to focus more on fresh fruits and vegetables, less on grains and dairy, esp. less on sugars and refined grains. I have just written the first part of a PCOS essay in the Gender Swaying Section that you may find helpful and hope to have the dietary guidelines within a few days. Losing weight and eating lower calories will only help with your PCOS. The Ingender and French Diets are not good for those with PCOS - the LE Diet with small amounts of whole grains would be better for you.
http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gender-swaying-discussion/9052-swaying-under-special-circumstances-part-3-pcos.html

I would have you begin taking 800 mg vitex immediately and continue until a day or two when you expect to O next month. You may also wish to add a small amount of cinnamon (1/2 tsp) a day which will help keep your blood sugar under control. Another thing to consider adding is exercise. The Exercise Enigma - both genders (http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?1411-The-Exercise-Enigma-both-genders) With PCOS, exercise is a MUST, even if you cannot do the full 60 min 6-7 days a week that I advise for pink swayers.

I personally think you should stop your prenatal (may sway blue) and I believe we talked a bit about cal-mag already?? If not you may want to read this http://genderdreaming.com/forum/trying-conceive-girl/610-calcium-conundrum-controversial.html I prefer baby aspirin to cranberry because it's safer but neither are safe while BF. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-girl-best-practices/7086-how-lower-ph-via-supps-cran-baby-aspirin-aspartame-other-techniques.html

You should def. take folic acid 1200-1600 mcg and may even want to take 2000 or more. This can help prevent miscarriages. Losing some weight and getting your blood sugar under control will also help a LOT to prevent future losses.

The best thing your husband can do is frequency patterns to lower sperm count. frequency of BD for pink and blue (http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?5636-frequency-of-BD-for-pink-and-blue) He can also take licorice root 450 mg 3 times a day from your AF-O but for those with recurrent losses, this may not be the best because it makes for poorer sperm quality.

[zanacal]

Just wanting to highlight that the original poster said she's breastfeeding - so I believe that would exclude baby aspirin/cranberry and Saw Palmetto.

[Gentle]

Thanks everyone - loving all the help here - what a kind place!

I had no breakfast today, and very small meals and I feel great! It is a start!

Ok - I think this will be my sway then for the next 2 weeks which should see me to the end of AF. I think I can manage this and hopefully as I go on and break through some barriers, I’ll then be able to cut down further. Very much open to critique. And the bits in italics I’m really not sure about. Forgive the excessive detail - I've never ever done a calorie controlled diet so these kind of thought processes are new for me!

Diet: Low Everything. Looking forward to checking out the UK ladies thread.

I’m going to skip breakfast, but have a milky cinnamon coffee if I feel I can’t manage. Not sure about this, but I might share an apple with my boys.

Lunch will be a slice of toast/bread with light Philadelphia or cottage cheese, plus one of the following:
• Small bowl of thin soup - spinach or leek or broccoli
• Once a week max - 1 egg omelette, maybe with a little cheese or herbs
• Lettuce salad dressed with lemon juice, with a coleslaw of grated cabbage, turnip and a little carrot & parsnip, with some linseed tossed in and maybe a spoonful of mayo.

Snack if necessary will be no more than 5 lightly salted tortilla chips. I really could do with some more ideas about this - something to turn to when I can tell I’m at breaking point and about to run for the chocolate!

Dinner will be a balanced family meal with me having a small portion, especially of the protein and carbs. No salt added!
• Proteins will be lean chicken, fish (white, salmon, small amount of smoked mackerel), chickpeas, quinoa.
• Carbs will be pasta, rice or maybe a tiny bit of potato. Not sure whether to go for brown rice or pasta.
• Low-carb vegetables. I haven’t really worked this out yet, especially as I have some stuff to work through in my fridge! My favourites and regulars are spinach/kale, sprouts, mushroom, broccoli, bell peppers, aubergine, courgette, carrots, sweet potato and cherry tomatoes. I’ll get to looking into them soon and meanwhile just eat small portions of what I have in stock, but any advice will be very welcome.
• I’ll be adding cinnamon to everything I can, and probably nutmeg too as I love it so much.
• Puddings will be v low fat yoghurts until I’ve finished those I have in stock (4-5) and then raspberries&cinnamon or rhubarb&cinnamon if I feel the need for something.

Supplements - I’m going to stop taking the pre-natals gradually. I’ve got a nasty cold and know from previously that I suffer more when I stop them.
I’m still undecided on the calc/mag combined tablets. More reading for tomorrow!
Vitex really messed with my cycles when I took it before so I really don’t want to take it again.
I was all set to take the saw palmetto but now I’m worried about bf - I plan to feed him as long as he wants and I don’t want to take any risks.
Cranberry likewise. I only have 400mg tablets and was planning to take 1 three times a day but not if there is a credible risk to ds2.
Folic acid - need to investigate a high dose but I’ll definitely need to get some if I’m stopping the prenatal!

Drinks - this will be my nemesis! I am addicted to Pepsi Max. I don’t want to be but I’ve let myself have too much thinking it is better than binging on chocolate. Stopping that will be VERY tough. I also drink a lot of diet lemonade with sugarfree Ribena. And water. I’m thinking of trying peppermint tea. I’ll just have to play this one by ear and not expect myself to be able to change everything at once. I’m feeling so good about today though that I haven’t craved Pepsi once!

Exercise - I’m going to try to do SOME. I’ve had a carpal tunnel release operation and it’s not healing fast, so not really weight bearing. This makes sorting a double buggy tricky! I have some dvds too but they are as yet unexplored [blush].

I’ll use antihistamine before expected O though I need to investigate the key ingredients more (because of bf mainly).

We’ll go down the frequent bd route - not sure when to start though!

[rainbowflower]

I found the best one to take when BF is "Actifed" - it's tested to be the safest one when BF
a lot of ladies on here think that diet fizzy drinks are OK when TTC pink if they contain aspartame

be careful with fish, as that's often VERY high in sodium and other nutrients that sway blue. You can buy frozen fish in supermarkets that contains less sodium.

[Gentle]

Thanks for your response rainbowflower - wow - I can drink diet fizzy? That is going to make a huge difference to how easy this is!

Yeah - the fish is a tricky one. It will often be frozen anyway, but we use smoked mackerel such a lot and love it and it is so cheap. Oh well, short-term I am sure I can cope.

What do you think about the rest? I have this worry that I've misunderstood the whole theory!
And then, this evening I'd promised dh a full roast dinner. So I'm kind of stuck with that and *trying* to eat small portions.

[atomic sagebrush]

Just wanting to highlight that the original poster said she's breastfeeding - so I believe that would exclude baby aspirin/cranberry and Saw Palmetto.

oH YES you're exactly right, I'm terribly sorry!!!! I will edit my reply.

[atomic sagebrush]

yes, again, just to reiterate in my first post I had somehow missed the BF info. I'm so sorry, this was one of the last posts I answered yesterday and I was little bleary eyed, I think. :(

Do not take SP while BF under any circumstances. Pep tea is also not safe in any more than dietary amounts. With Vitex, yes, it can mess with your cycle, but it may be that's how it works - by making your hormones act differently than they normally do. Your option of course!!

My personal experience with cran and breastfeeding was that it caused serious bruising and bleeding both in myself and in the kids I was breastfeeding at the time (I was tandem nursing 2 at the time) and I only took it for 3 days. :( Some people have taken it tho, it's just that I don't feel it's safe given my experience.

You don't need to give up the Pepsi Max, it's artificially sweetened, right? Artificial sweeteners do seem to sway pink and caffeine, we have found to be neutral and maybe even sway pink in large amounts (you shouldn't drink large amounts when BF obviously)

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks for your response rainbowflower - wow - I can drink diet fizzy? That is going to make a huge difference to how easy this is!

Yeah - the fish is a tricky one. It will often be frozen anyway, but we use smoked mackerel such a lot and love it and it is so cheap. Oh well, short-term I am sure I can cope.

What do you think about the rest? I have this worry that I've misunderstood the whole theory!
And then, this evening I'd promised dh a full roast dinner. So I'm kind of stuck with that and *trying* to eat small portions.

For most swayers, we try to avoid meat and fish totally but if you find that extra protein helps with your PCOS, I would jsut try to eat a lot less meat, and a lot less often. As long as you're eating less protein than you were, that can only help, even if it's more than my regular recomendation.

[Gentle]

Thanks for all that!

I'm hoping to gradually cut out all meat and fish but I'm worried about my milk supply. Ds2 (10mo) has increased his feeding frequency whenever I've tried to diet before so I assume my supply had dropped. I love feeding him, so I don't want to risk pushing him to stop earlier than he wants to. He's feeding more often the last day or so though that might be his snotty cold...

I'm realising this dieting lark is fraught with danger! Tuesday was roast night, and too late to find an alternative. Tonight I'm eating at a friend's who knows I'm dieting but not swaying (not telling anyone IRL) so I'm just describing it as a detox! Tomorrow night is our anniversary of getting together/his proposal as we are going to the same restaurant - anyone know about salt in dishes at Cafe Rouge? And Sunday we're visiting with church friends so it is likely to be a roast lunch. Sigh! Other than that I'm pleased with my progress - no breakfasts, small lunches and dinners, and the biggest change of all for me - only a small handful of low-salt tortillas for an emergency snack 2 days out of 3 so far. Normally I'd have eaten the whole bag! So it's progress and I feel good about it - good enough to think I'll do better and better which is a very different place for my head to be!

Thanks again for all your support!

[atomic sagebrush]

Gradual cutbacks are always best for milk supply. I agree I've had trouble when losing weight while BF too.

All you can do is your best when faced with situations like that! Good luck!