Avoiding GDe Triggers… and other safety warnings

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Here's what's working for me this month. I'm in a much better place now, but I'm still human and GDe triggers can distract me from my happiness.

1. No royal baby stuff. I check People.com less now and close the page if there's a royal baby mention. I don't read royal baby threads on this site. In good news, where I live, interest quickly waned.

2. Keep my eyes on my own children, esp when I'm out with them. I've been saying this for a while but actually DOING it helps so much. Plus it makes for better weekends - I'm dousing my kids with the attention they crave and we're all happier for it!

3. Zero in-person clothes shopping. This one's easy for me, I hate shopping in general!

4. Don't set myself up for a trigger. I don't ask pregnant women if they know what they're having. Don't get all worked up if an acquaintance announces what they're having. (Does it really matter in the grand scheme? Nope). Oh and zero Facebook (I haven't been on it for a long long time).

5. Simply think of my kids when I'm away from them. Their cuddles, their kisses, their giggles, their joy….! And my heart starts to warm, my lips start to grin. It's happening right this moment, in fact! Simply being grateful works every time.

Updated May 21st, 2015 at 09:05 AM by ocean



  1. Kitty0911's Avatar
    Great advice. I need to keep my butt off of FB! That is my weakness!! I have a friend due next month who doesn't know the gender of her baby and I'm just dying to know!! How did you stop checking FB? Was it easy for you? I try to only check it in the morning and at night, but find myself checking it throughout the day when I'm bored.
  2. Pink rose 76's Avatar
    I definitely get no. 4 that is my worst. Too many people seem to be pregnant and they all seem to be having girls. But I specifically don't ask now, try to be nonchalant about to all.

    You're doing great Ocean xxxx
  3. ocean's Avatar
    Kitty - Think of Facebook as a bad habit that needs busting. We do it by rote when we're bored - but it isn't an innocuous habit. I always left it unhappier than I was before. ALWAYS. I don't need that and neither do you.

    Delete the app from your phone - that's the huge first step. After a few weeks of checking (less frequently) via desktop, I disabled my acct. (it doesn't delete data but mentally puts it further away). If anyone asks in real life if you're not on it anymore, or you miss a piece of news, just say 'oh Im never on it anymore, too much going on!' Or I told my friends the truth which is a painful family issue played out on Facebook and I realized I didn't need that in my life. They were curious at first but no one cared. Life moves on and I think it's now been 9+ months. I never think of it (except now, writing this blog!).

    And then replace that habit with something else. I check cnn.com, people, and zillow. Sometimes ny times. Or just put your phone away and breathe in FREEDOM because that's what you've just done for yourself.

    Pink - I like your nonchalant point - it's interesting how if we start by trying to keep perspective and stay even keeled, it gets easier and easier over time.

    So happy you're both reading. Thank you!
    Updated May 21st, 2015 at 09:45 AM by ocean
  4. Mulberry Smurf's Avatar
    lovely words, the last comment made me think of my own children and smile :) being present in the moment has helped me as well, and I have also been tuning out the royal baby news. Stay strong :) xx