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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush View Post
    I don't keep statistics on stuff like that because firstly, for most of the years of this site, that would have been a deceptively small group of people. Secondly, people who get pregnant in that first month are not randomly selected - either they get pregnant fast because they're highly fertile, or because they weren't swaying that hard, or both, and aren't representative of the site as a whole. And finally, and most important, I did not want to see people deliberately sitting out the first month of trying for absolutely no reason, thinking things like "well if getting pregnant the first month sways, I'll be sure not to get pregnant/do everything in my power TO get pregnant" when the "getting pregnant" part of it really has nothing to do with the outcome of the sway! Your body has no way to know how many months you've been trying; if getting pregnant fast indicates anything, NOT getting pregnant fast, deliberately, doesn't then mean that the outcome is changed, it's basically an arbitrary thing, if that makes any sense.

    I would cut that dose in half since it comes in two capsules. We are seeing SCH forming at that level of intake.

    Whenever someone has gender desire I think it's nearly always best to find out. A few people insist that it's better for them not to find out until they have a child to focus on, and I respect that, but overall I find that a very large number people who don't find out, are really doing it to "keep hope alive as long as possible." By hope, they mean a possible fantasy, not just "maybe it's a boy, maybe it's a girl" type of thinking, like they basically pretend for nine months that they're getting the gender they are hoping for because "I'll never have the chance to experience this otherwise". I have been deeply concerned with the level of denial and even outright playacting that some people who are Team Green engage in. Even tho it may be pleasurable while it's going on, it is WORSE than nothing because people feel like they have something that is then taken away.

    They allow themselves to think they're having a successful sway as long as possible and then are in for a shock right at the moment of supreme physical, mental, emotional, and hormonal challenge. We have had a small, but concerning minority of people have legitimate mental breakdowns in the delivery room or shortly thereafter (one lady had a wrong reading on an ultrasound so just had a massive shock and she ended up hysterical and having to be sedated, but others simply refused to find out so they could continue believing as long as possible that they were getting the gender they'd hoped for.) Two people that I can think of even ended up hospitalized, one for weeks, another for a couple days. This is obviously not the norm but it has happened.

    If you can honestly, truly, keep in mind that it can absolutely be an opposite, and you find it might be helpful to you not to know, that's one thing. But if you're going into Team Green because you just like daydreaming that you're getting a guarantee, you like staying wrapped up in that possibility and just don't want to shatter the illusion, then I strongly suggest finding out. As hard as I try to push back on this, I still regularly have people who are just devastated, blindsided, and simply can't even believe that their sway could have possibly failed. As much as I say there are no guarantees, people do still think they have a guarantee with a "perfect" sway and it's really hard to accept. I see this so often that I just really do believe finding out is best for virtually everyone.

    For me, I hadn't found out with my first two (had no gender preference) and for whatever reason, I did with my 3rd. I was SO SURE he was a girl! I "just knew" he was a girl, same as how I'd "just known" my first child was a boy. All the symptoms and signs were there, the stupid Chinese Gender calendar, heartbeat, etc etc and I was absolutely floored and devastated hearing "she" was a he. It was one of the worst moments of my whole life. It really felt like this changeling had basically killed my daughter who I had been so certain was coming. Because I found out, it gave me some time to make peace with it, buy some super cute boy clothes, get my head back on straight because I was being absolutely ridiculous! That little girl that I had imagined wasn't real, had never been real, and I was having feelings of rejection, even rage at this innocent child who had done absolutely nothing wrong at all. And by the time he came, I was ready for his arrival (and a good thing too because OMword he was a handful from minute one! I would so not have wanted to be dealing with a challenging child at the same time I was feeling the grief of gender disappointment).
    I couldn’t agree more!!! As a thrice team greener here, you should definitely find out unless you totally absolutely do not care! With my first two, a girl then a boy, it was great I hd no preconceived ideas about what I wanted and we knew we’d have more kids anyways. Then my third we really wanted another boy (our girl was going through the very sassy age of 5) so when my husband said it’s a girl on the operating table my heart sank and what a stupid, selfish, ungrateful place to be in when they’re handing you a perfectly healthy gorgeous little blonde hair blue eyed girl baby to feel like you failed. Then be isolated in the hospital for 4 days in a weird depressed place dealing with whatever in my mind I had made up should be. I pray for forgiveness every day for not feeling over the moon thankful to God for giving me such an incredible gift!! Anyways, if you feel even the slightest like you rather have one over the other even a fraction, just find out as soon as possible in the privacy of your own home (I’ve seen numerous gender reveals with very disappointed reactions on social media, um what about when that kid sees it one day!) praying we get a healthy babies!


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  3. #42
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    That's great advice and insight, thanks @Thefinalcountdown!

  4. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cookies22 View Post
    Thank you so much Atomic. You have no idea how much your words bring me comfort.

    I am struggling big time with prenatal hormone-induced anxiety. I expected it as I had the same experience with all 3 of my pregnancies.

    Of course it seems impossible for me to not analyse my sway, which is so silly because it's done now! But I was wondering if you could put my mind at ease.

    When planning the sway I didn't do a tonne of reading because I already knew a bit from the previous time and I didn't want to get obsessed. I'd heard 0+12 mentioned but then saw a thread where it was dismissed. Now in reading the 'how we got our girls' thread there seem to be a lot of women who got pink with 0+12. I'm wondering if I should have attempted that as I have such clear O pains.

    We BD on CD8 and CD11, both in the evening. On the morning of CD11 I got a positive OPK. That afternoon I was trying to decide whether I should BD that night or the next morning. I'm guessing the next morning would have qualified as 0+12 (I had ovulation cramping around 9pm the evening of CD11). However I don't think I could have held myself back from BDing when I felt those cramps. I've read that it takes 10 hours or so for sperm to capacitate, which makes me think that BD the morning of CD12 would have resulted in a BFN because it would literally give like an hour for the capacitated sperm to get an egg? It would be cutting the window so fine wouldn't it?

    Then there's also a tiny part of me that thinks if we didn't BD CD11 then we'd have a 3 day cut off with CD8, but I've read that BD 3 days before O is only a 14% chance of conception, pretty low IMO, even if I did have lots of EWCM! I keep thinking back to that day CD11. I had been to a funeral that day and was feeling very much like I wanted to BD because I wanted to connect in with DH (and I got a high reading on the OPK), so it felt right, as did CD8. I think waiting til the next day would have been too scary for me as I was already so thin and wanted to conceive without wasting time, and in previous cycles I'd aimed at a 2 day cut off, not 3 as 3 seems ridiculous low odds for conception. I'm a big believer in intuition and I definitely felt like I wanted to make love on CD 8 and CD11. A 3 day cut off probably would have resulted in a BFN even though I did feel wet down there. I just wonder though, because it seems like my DH has super sperm, so maybe we could have conceived a girl with a 3 day cut off? There are so many conflicting reports on different forums, some women swear it worked for them multiple times etc. I guess if Shettles really did work or there was any obvious pattern then Fertility Friend charts would all demonstrate it!

    At least I think with this approach I have balls in both parks; there's a possibility that the CD8 sperm fertilised the egg and also a possibility that CD11 got it. I know I can get an opposite with literally 1 attempt 1 day before O (that's my DS2!), so I have to let go of the idea of having done a 3 day cut off alone. It's just hard because I know a couple of women who have conceived girls this way, by DTD just after they finished their period and conceived pink. It's hard not to think 'why didn't I just try what she did?'. There will always be something that we could have changed, with any sway. I think that's what makes swaying hard.

    I think a lot of my worries are triggered by my past experience, stressing about our one attempt one day before O. Makes me wonder if cut offs work for some and not for others... my DS1 we BD every single day from AF to AF (I had gained weight recently though after getting married), DS2 was one attempt 1 day before O, but I had only been on the diet for 10-11 weeks. This time I've been on the diet 14 weeks but have been losing weight for much longer, around 5 months, no breakfast for a year, consistently exercising and losing weight, and I conceived this baby at a my lowest ever adult BMI of 17.1 (honestly I was worried about losing O, I'm so thin).

    Sorry for my rambling, I think I need to spend some time thinking seriously about the benefits of each scenario, because they're both wonderful, the idea of 3 little boys growing up together sounds quite storybook to me too. It's really just the feeling of 'did I stuff it up / would it have been a different outcome if I'd had a cut off etc' and other people's comments that get me, but as you say, people say dumb things ALL the time regardless. I know a woman who has 1 kid and gets criticised for that, someone with 5 boys, and a friend of mine who has a girl and 3 boys and everyone kept saying "poor Skylar" (her daughter). So you're right! People are jerks! Haha.

    Thanks for cruising with me while I ride all the waves. Hormones are wild. I guess I'm just worried I stuffed things up timing-wise. But I know you've seen HUNDREDS of sways and you know that Shettles does not work, regardless of how many times you try it!

    EDIT: I just re-read my original post on 'back after an opposite' and going into this, my whole approach was intended to be an 'invisible' sway, so knowing that I wanted it invisible & relaxed, that's what I definitely got, doing the BD when we felt like it (luckily fell into e4D), along with consistent weight loss, exercise and LE for 14+ weeks. That makes me feel better, like this is precisely how it is supposed to be.
    In reading up on Shettles attempts I've also noticed a LOT of women seem to have miscarriages when they have long cut-offs? They try to do cut offs for ages, are stoked with a BFP and then lose the baby (and give up on timing altogether). It does make sense to me as the sperm remaining after such a long time wouldn't be the healthiest, and I am alllll about healthy fresh sperm.

  5. #44
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    Ok I'm posting way too much today �� but I have been researching online and have a folder on my phone now of literally dozens of people saying that they timed everything perfectly for a girl according to Shettles, massive huge cut offs and got a boy, and then DTD on ovulation day and got a girl. I think the annoying thing is how common this incorrect theory is! I even found a fertility site that was 'debunking fertility myths' and it said that Shettles is true! Blimey! No wonder we're all so confused! Anyway, now I have this fabulous folder to scroll through if I wake up in the night anxious about my sway timing.

    I think there's that part of me that thinks if this babe is a boy we should have tried a long cut off because we've never had one... but other studies like the NZ study show more girls conceived on O day, so who knows!

    https://theconversation.com/mondays-...our-baby-12896
    Last edited by Cookies22; March 27th, 2022 at 08:12 AM.

  6. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cookies22 View Post
    In reading up on Shettles attempts I've also noticed a LOT of women seem to have miscarriages when they have long cut-offs? They try to do cut offs for ages, are stoked with a BFP and then lose the baby (and give up on timing altogether). It does make sense to me as the sperm remaining after such a long time wouldn't be the healthiest, and I am alllll about healthy fresh sperm.
    Keep in mind that most of these people have no idea when they ovulated in relation to O (and neither do we). Most of the people who THINK they got pregnant with long cutoffs ovulated sooner than they thought, or had an attempt they thought was after ovulation that was actually the one that ended in pregnancy.

    Sperm is meant to survive for a while inside the female body. It has some primitive form of communication by which it can sort of organize its individual constituents into a bit of a schedule, so there are always sperm sitting there dormant and others that are ready to fertilize the egg, until they've all capacitated and died. (After capacitation, the sperm is hyperactive and desperately seeking an egg, and they use up their energy reserves and die after that) Until the sperm loses its protective cap, it's relatively protected from harm, so the sperm that are in the repro tract for days are believed to simply be sleeping, safe, until it's their turn. The DNA is NOT harmed because the genetic material had already divided a long time ago.

    Something that occurs to me is that people who go on a long time not getting pregnant, can definitely be from long cutoffs, but it can also be from people with lower egg quality or sperm health/numbers overall. This could easily predispose this group to have more losses. Additionally, I would point out that people who do long cutoffs are also very very likely to be doing lots of other sway tactics, some of which actually may harm sperm quality (long abstains, harsh supplements) or their ability to get pregnant successfully (herbs, really restrictive diets) When we look at people who insist on long cutoffs for months/years, they are not the average person and are often into much more extreme swaying methods on the whole. And finally, when women have losses, they often look back and search for reasons to explain those losses, typically things that they can easily change in the future (no one wants to have another loss, and this is completely understandable). People often misremember how much coffee they drank, how long their abstain or cutoff was, etc. Not all of them, but enough to muddy the waters for sure, and I've actually repeatedly seen this happen with my own eyes where I could go back and look at people's FF charts and see exactly when they had sex in relation to O, but months later they're sure they had a 6 day cutoff when really they only had a 3 day cutoff.

    Long story short, I think you did have a very good attempt, but just didn't want you or anyone to read anything in here because we may not be able to see a trend from any of that.
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  8. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush View Post
    Keep in mind that most of these people have no idea when they ovulated in relation to O (and neither do we). Most of the people who THINK they got pregnant with long cutoffs ovulated sooner than they thought, or had an attempt they thought was after ovulation that was actually the one that ended in pregnancy.

    Sperm is meant to survive for a while inside the female body. It has some primitive form of communication by which it can sort of organize its individual constituents into a bit of a schedule, so there are always sperm sitting there dormant and others that are ready to fertilize the egg, until they've all capacitated and died. (After capacitation, the sperm is hyperactive and desperately seeking an egg, and they use up their energy reserves and die after that) Until the sperm loses its protective cap, it's relatively protected from harm, so the sperm that are in the repro tract for days are believed to simply be sleeping, safe, until it's their turn. The DNA is NOT harmed because the genetic material had already divided a long time ago.

    Something that occurs to me is that people who go on a long time not getting pregnant, can definitely be from long cutoffs, but it can also be from people with lower egg quality or sperm health/numbers overall. This could easily predispose this group to have more losses. Additionally, I would point out that people who do long cutoffs are also very very likely to be doing lots of other sway tactics, some of which actually may harm sperm quality (long abstains, harsh supplements) or their ability to get pregnant successfully (herbs, really restrictive diets) When we look at people who insist on long cutoffs for months/years, they are not the average person and are often into much more extreme swaying methods on the whole. And finally, when women have losses, they often look back and search for reasons to explain those losses, typically things that they can easily change in the future (no one wants to have another loss, and this is completely understandable). People often misremember how much coffee they drank, how long their abstain or cutoff was, etc. Not all of them, but enough to muddy the waters for sure, and I've actually repeatedly seen this happen with my own eyes where I could go back and look at people's FF charts and see exactly when they had sex in relation to O, but months later they're sure they had a 6 day cutoff when really they only had a 3 day cutoff.

    Long story short, I think you did have a very good attempt, but just didn't want you or anyone to read anything in here because we may not be able to see a trend from any of that.
    I am new here I am mom of 2 girls and I found I am pregnant again with #3 last week my ovulation was around 7th march I have seen alot gender sway methods like bdm and shettles and lunar gender swaying and diet too to be honest I am bit confused and i didnt do any of that they seem to be too much work and stressing. Thanks for debunking these false theories that kinda harmful sometimes.

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  9. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cookies22 View Post
    Ok I'm posting way too much today �� but I have been researching online and have a folder on my phone now of literally dozens of people saying that they timed everything perfectly for a girl according to Shettles, massive huge cut offs and got a boy, and then DTD on ovulation day and got a girl. I think the annoying thing is how common this incorrect theory is! I even found a fertility site that was 'debunking fertility myths' and it said that Shettles is true! Blimey! No wonder we're all so confused! Anyway, now I have this fabulous folder to scroll through if I wake up in the night anxious about my sway timing.

    I think there's that part of me that thinks if this babe is a boy we should have tried a long cut off because we've never had one... but other studies like the NZ study show more girls conceived on O day, so who knows!

    https://theconversation.com/mondays-...our-baby-12896
    Yep. True for me! I have a very regular cycle. My first son I got from sex right after my period ended, my second son my husband changed his mind about TTC and we stopped having sex days before we thought I was even fertile, my 3rd son was a Shettles opposite (my husband wasn't even HOME when I ovulated) and my 4th son was a sneak attack, who even knows when I got him LOL. Then with my daughter, it was late at night (like 1am or so) on O-1, which is technically O Day. (not from trying to sway because I no longer believed in timing at all, just because it worked out that way)

    Back before I got into this, when I would tell people "but I got three boys with cutoffs, how can this work" (or with tons of dairy, which I also had with all my boys) they'd say something like "well, your body just works the opposite". But seriously - if some of our bodies "just work the opposite" then how the heck can any of these tactics be reliable sway methods?? Either these things work for everyone, and then they're just not 100% guarantee like the claims are made, or they don't. There can't be anything worth doing, that works flawlessly for some people and then other people's bodies are "just working the opposite".

    The state of science here in 2022 (on the Internetz especially) is pretty sad really. Anything where there's ever been a study that seemed to find a correlation, even when it's later debunked, disproven, revealed even to be an outright fraud, is touted by some sites as true. And Shettles, by virtue of being so highly publicized, has been harder to get rid of than an infestation of dandelions. But Dr. Shettles died a long time ago, and he was very old then and not doing science for a while prior. Everyone in our lifetimes claiming the mantle of "Shettles" did so to make money on the man's good name (because Shettles was wrong, he wasn't a charlatan) and they did it without his approval. If he was alive today I know he would have moved on from his method because it just doesn't work!

    You're absolutely right, there are studies (and more than that one mentioned there) that show slightly more girls conceived around O, and additionally there are many many more than show 50-50 boys and girls conceived every cycle day. When researchers took Dr. Shettles OWN data and used modern understanding of ovulation charting to properly calculate ovulation, it was still 50-50 with the data he himself collected. MOST of the few that claim to prove otherwise, when you read them you can see that Clomid was used for those who wanted girls and IUI was used for those who wanted boys (huge confounder).

    Just because I haven't blathered on enough, LOL, I do want to point out to people that timing doesn't sway. Period. The findings in a couple studies that purport to show "more girls conceived around O, more boys with cutoffs" are also misleading. If, as I strongly believe is the case, what this is all coming down to is "the fertility factor" where couples that are superfertile are having more boys, and couples that are still fertile but just less so are having more girls, it would therefore be the case that people who COULD conceive with longer cutoffs are by definition more fertile, meaning they'd have more boys, not because of the cutoff, but because the overall higher fertility of both parties (higher sperm count, better sperm health, better EWCM and more of it to enable sperm to survive those long cutoffs). And those who could only conceive around O may be coming in more likely to have girls to start with and were only able to get pregnant very close to the egg dropping (lower and less healthy sperm, less EWCM, etc) Just gotta toss that out there before anyone reads this and thinks "aha, see, timing DOES sway, it's just that it's reversed, so now I'm going to try for a boy with a 6 day cutoff!" No. Don't do that. Long cutoffs will often equate to one attempt, because most of the sperm will be long gone before the egg ever shows up. That's if you could even get pregnant that way, which you are most likely not able to. Stick with 3-5 attempts in the fertile window for blue.

    Timing is BY FAR the most studied element of gender swaying. Studied by responsible researchers doing good work, too. If there was anything to it, anything at all, it would be completely proven by now, because it's EASY. Timing is simple and obvious (which is why people love it so) and is tailor-made to be proven in studies and in the real world. (unlike diet, which is much more complicated due to the endless levels of variation of what human beings eat!) That timing isn't proven, that we're all still sitting here discussing it so many years after Shettles first looked through a microscope and mistook capacitated and uncapacitated sperm for Y and X sperm, simply indicates that it doesn't work. Things that are cut and dry obvious like timing, show clear and repeatable results in labs and in the real world. Anything simple to study, where some researchers are finding one result, other researchers are finding the opposite, is evidence that the "thing" in question is not true.
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  10. #48
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    Actually, I'd guess THOUSANDS of timing opposites by this point! Fifteen years on swaying sites is a LONNNNNG time, LOL. My GD baby just had his 14th birthday and I had a moment of shock realizing how long I've been thinking about gender swaying, ai yi yi! The obsessiveness runs strong in me, it's no wonder I have four boys LOL.

    O+12 is without a doubt my absolute, complete, least favorite sway tactic. (like, I'd rather see people douche than do O+12, no joke). I have a full debunking of it here: https://genderdreaming.com/forum/try...9-no-12-a.html It is terrible. It is unscientific, impossible to get it right, is based on the literal stupidest set of information known to mankind (one woman who was swaying in a bunch of other ways, and a poorly done study with math mistakes, without proper determination of when ovulation took place, in which allegedly a whopping TWO people claimed to conceive at ovulation) it prevents conception, it drives completely sane and rational people to become massive control freaks (thereby swaying blue more than if they'd done nothing), if you believe in timing you're having an attempt that would SWAY BLUE according to Shettles, it is THE UTTER WORST and I promise you missed absolutely nothing but a lot of BFN by skipping it.

    In short, I hate it.

    People in those threads a) have no idea when they DTD in relation to O, because unless they had an ultrasound, they don't know when the egg dropped, and b) are simply ASSUMING that's when they had sex because it's a sway tactic they heard of. That's what everyone does in those "how we got girls/boys" (even me! I think I mentioned how much sodium I ate, and I don't even BELIEVE in sodium for swaying!) because we figure that people who are considering swaying would be interested in the information!

    Please do not now go over your sway looking for O+12. You cannot tell when you had sex in relation to O by any method other than ultrasound - not before or after the fact. OPK and O cramps - neither of them are at all reliable! I think the odds that you had sex at O+12 were slim to none based on when the pos OPK came but that's actually GOOD because you would not have conceived if you had an O+12 attempt.

    Now, to clarify about sperm capacitation, sperm capacitates in waves. The time it takes a deposit to first begin to capacitate has been found anywhere from 3 hours to 24 hours and subsequent waves of capacitation occur even beyond that (uncapacitated sperm lasts for 2-3 days in the repro tract of course) No one knows why, and it may be that there's something in the female reproductive tract that governs this process. (by the way, another reason why O+12 can't work, cause what if you're the person who didn't see the sperm capacitate for a whole entire day! ZERO chance of conception)

    Also keep in mind that it's not only that sperm take time to capacitate, but they also need to make it to the egg, and the sperm that get there first are often dead on arrival, and can't fertilize anything. There is NO GUARANTEE that the egg will live twelve hours. The whole "eggs live 24 hours" thing is not true, it's for purposes of preventing conception with natural family planning. Scientists imagined (IMAGINED!) a theoretical (THEORETICAL) upper limit of eggs possibly surviving, and then use that as a way not to achieve conception, but to prevent it. Most eggs do not live 24 hours, most eggs probably don't live 12.
    If human beings were meant to conceive with one shot 12 hours after ovulation, let alone that most of the girls ever conceived were due to that timing (this makes no sense at all!) the reproductive tract would be straight and the sperm would be delivered right to the egg. Some animals do actually have physical structures that are more straightforwward in delivering sperm to egg quickly. But instead, humans conceive the vast majority of babies, boy and girl alike, from sperm that was there in advance of or shortly after O, giving the sperm time to get to the egg, capacitate, and lie in wait for Miss Eggo.

    I think it's extremely unlikely, as I mentioned before, that anything was left from CD 8.

    I conceived a baby right after I had my period, and it was a boy. And I don't have long periods, either. Additionally there are also a set of old studies from Shettles days that showed long cutoffs = boys and some people were even still trying that back on Ingender sometimes.

    I explained most of this in my other post, but if "cutoffs work for some people and not others" that effectively means "cut offs don't work."

    I know where you're sitting right now it's easy to say "woulda coulda shoulda" but the catch is, that going on months and months not conceiving has actual consequences. You don't see that right now because you did get pregnant, but were I to allow/encourage anyone to chase these ridick, impossible sway tactics like DTD after their period or O+12, both of which have such utterly slim chance of conception for the average person, it would be a disaster. Firstly because as the BFN mount, people start to freak out and give up on the things that ACTUALLY work chasing tactics that do nothing and prevent conception, and also because they lose too much weight (which, you were definitely flirting with this situation big time! Oh gosh no breakfast for a year???) and end up stopping ovulation, and have to basically sway blue just to get their cycles going again.

    I will say this, and I don't say it to be negative or to contribute to your anxiety, because truly you had a fine sway and every chance of a girl - if you do get an opposite, it's due to the detail oriented nature of these questions and not being able to let go of control. You're still trying to control, micromanage, and overanalyze your sway to a fairly unusual degree. Everyone does it somewhat, and that is ok (and trying to completely eliminate it is only a different form of control freakishness!) but then some people begin to fall into my "Danger Will Robinson" category. You're not in my top 10 or 20 people, maybe not even in the top 50, but top 100...ehhhh, maybe?!? Again - a fine sway, every chance of a girl, but the control freakishness of these questions is what jumps out to me if I had to locate a fault to single out here.

    So if as you're saying, that this feels in retrospect like a chillaxed, invisible sway, that is GREAT. I am thrilled to read that. That is exactly where I would want you to be mentally. If this is just pregnancy hormones kicking in, and you weren't feeling quite so control freaky when you conceived, that's fabulous.

    Yep that's just it - everyone has something to say, always, it's just that it stings when it feels like lemon juice in the cut that we already have due to our gender desire! People say things to people with no kids, one kid, too many kids, all one or all the other, even with pigeon pairs people are like "but Kylie needs a sister/Trevor needs a brother". It just never ends and so it's best to learn to handle comments since it's apparently impossible to prevent them!
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  11. #49
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Quote Originally Posted by nightingale2011 View Post
    I am new here I am mom of 2 girls and I found I am pregnant again with #3 last week my ovulation was around 7th march I have seen alot gender sway methods like bdm and shettles and lunar gender swaying and diet too to be honest I am bit confused and i didnt do any of that they seem to be too much work and stressing. Thanks for debunking these false theories that kinda harmful sometimes.

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    Debunking false theories is what I live to do!

    I am happy to go over (or link to you where I have already gone over) all these things so just let me know if you would like me to do that!
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    Thanks Atomic. I guess I worry now that we are one of those super fertile couples (falling preg first try with #2 and #3) which makes me more blue friendly, and therefore a cut off would have reduced some of my DH’s mega sperm count and therefore swayed pink? BUT for all I know my uncharacteristically early O (never ovulated that early in my life!) could have been my body’s way of saying ‘her fertility is declining, we need to make a girl to replace her’ lol

    I was definitely not obsessing over my sway at the time and was very relaxed hence now looking back and thinking ‘why didn’t I consider that?’.

    I guess if you’ve fallen preg 3 days before O then it could have happened for me too? Too late now and gosh I’m not the type of person to suddenly say ‘I’m ovulating, let’s switch tactics and try shettles’… after DH hesitating the month before I was very keen to get pregnant and avoid a Christmas baby!

    It’s definitely my pregnancy hormones kicking in… I haven’t worried about any of these things up until now, I actually thought when I got my BFP well that’s a great shot / decent sway from why I’ve read… it’s only now that these hormones are flying around that I’m feeling this way �� I had the same experience last time when I found out DS2 is a beautiful boy, I started stressing about why didn’t I try Shettles, so I think a lot of it is just old anxiety rearing it’s ugly head. I actually found an amazing counsellor when pregnant with DS2 and we worked through a lot of that anxiety, so I’m glad I have her on hand this time too.

    It's hard when you've conceived two DS around ovulation to DTD this time around O again and not stress, but honestly if it were down to that then I guess everyone who used a ClearBlue Ov Prediction kit would have sons! Hoping my weight loss swayed... do you have any idea how important the various factors are? I know diet, exercise, 1 attempt are all important, do you think all 3 factors are equally important? Or one is more important than the other? I definitely lost a tonne of weight & was 'declining' for a good few months, so hoping that works in my favour. I tried adding my sway but it asks me to confirm gender before I can add it? Is there any way I can add without saying our results?
    Last edited by Cookies22; March 28th, 2022 at 05:13 AM.

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