Anyone else torn between finding out and not finding out ?

[heidih1977]

yeah it is really tough. I am also torn with guilt feelings for even feeling like this way at all when you think about all the women that suffer losses or cannot even conceive in the first place. My scan is 8 days away and I feel physically sick at the thoughts of it. Even though I am trying to convince myself this another boy in order to avoid disappointment I know I will be absolutely gutted. There are now 5 other friends/ family members that are expecting later this year and there is one confirmed girl already. I just know I will be the one with the next boy and they will all be sitting opposite me in the summer with their little girls....I just don't know how I will cope with that. I am not a naturally jealous person but this topic or subject just engulfs me with jealously when I think of friends having little girls and me none. God I won't be sleeping a wink this day week!!!!

[zareenNFO]

If you're not finding out if you're having a girl or a boy (or considering not finding out), there's a website you should know about called NotFindingOut. It's an online baby registry that caters specifically to parents who are waiting for the delivery room surprise. All of Not Finding Out's products are paired into girl and boy complements, so you register for a specific item, you just don't know if you're receiving the girl or boy version of that item. Not Finding Out also carries a lot of gender neutral items so you can register for gender neutral items AND gender specific stuff. If someone buys a gift for you before the baby is born, you will receive a beautifully wrapped Preview Card showing both the girl and boy version of the item they bought instead of the gift itself (since receiving the gender specific gift would spoil the surprise!). As soon as your baby is born, your gender specific gifts are shipped straight to you. Very fun!!!

[Mum23boys]

yeah it is really tough. I am also torn with guilt feelings for even feeling like this way at all when you think about all the women that suffer losses or cannot even conceive in the first place. My scan is 8 days away and I feel physically sick at the thoughts of it. Even though I am trying to convince myself this another boy in order to avoid disappointment I know I will be absolutely gutted. There are now 5 other friends/ family members that are expecting later this year and there is one confirmed girl already. I just know I will be the one with the next boy and they will all be sitting opposite me in the summer with their little girls....I just don't know how I will cope with that. I am not a naturally jealous person but this topic or subject just engulfs me with jealously when I think of friends having little girls and me none. God I won't be sleeping a wink this day week!!!!

I HAVE 6 PREGNANT FRIENDS ALL DUE THIS YEAR ..... ALL WITH GIRLS !!! Talk about sods law !!! Whats the betting mine is the only boy .... i sooo wished it was evenly spread and some got boys but no its like someone up there is laughing at me !!

[heidih1977]

oh gosh well I reckon you HAVE to get a girl this time around mum23boys....it would be a gross miscarriage of injustice if you don't! will keep everything crossed for you. I shall be facing my fate this coming friday!

[iluvmy4sons]

My husband does not want to find out but I can. I need to know because I always pick a special outfit for the baby to come in. I am not sure I could handle picking up a little dress or pink outfit and then not being able to use it. This baby is my last. I had a hard time with my DS4 this time I am prepared to hear boy. If I do I will be running up to the Carters outlet next weekend and buying the outfit I saw to take him home in.

I think this what I will get if he is a boy it has a little hat and shoes to go with it as well.

2-Piece Overall Set | Baby Boy Little Whale

[fish2012]

That is so cute, buy it anyway you can always give it away!

[KidAtHeart]

I'm so glad this website exists! It really helps to know I am not alone. I am driving myself crazy. We did not find out at the 20 week scan bc I was too scared to hear 'boy' again. We found out with first two and not the third. Surprisingly, I didn't get gd in the delivery room - I was just so happy to have the baby OUT that I didn't think about it for awhile. It hit me later that night when I was alone. Cried myself to sleep. Fast forward four and a half years later... gd still here! I think I would feel disappointed at the birth if I heard boy, so I am going to find out at my later scan (between 28-32 wks). The saving grace is that no one will know that we know, so I can choose to keep it a secret and come to terms with it in private instead of having a baby in my arms. I know I will love him no matter what, I don't really have any negative issues with having boys. It's the loss of a dream. Ah well. At least I know I did everything in my power to follow my dream and if it isn't meant to be, I hope I will learn to let go. I think I will be repeating the serenity prayer a lot!

"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference."

[1+2+3boys]

I can't wait to find out what you are having, I so hope it's the little girl you want and sorry to hear about your lost twin. I have three boys too and have never swayed and next will for our 4th and most definitely final baby. This is what I am hoping to do...

I don't want to find out the sex at the scan because I don't want to stop being excited about the pregnancy or feel sad while I have hormones to add to it plus the tiredness of looking after my boys whilst pregnant.

I will make sure no one announces or tells me the sex of the baby when it is born and try not to look when it is placed on my chest to hold. I will look into my new babies face and bond/ get to know my baby for as long as I need to. Then I will look between the legs to find out for myself so I can react in my own way and not be influecned by anyone elses tone of voice or what they say etc. (My partner ruined the sex scan for our twins by saying sorry when we found out so it was hard to think positive after hearing that). Then even if it is a boy and I am a bit sad, the momment of birth was not ruined and I will already have bonded with him enough to not mind as much.

That's my little fairy tale. I wonder if anyone has done this on here and what it was like. I think I will call it a 'he' in the womb too

[Mum23boys]

1+2+3BOYS - I think that sounds fabulous !!! My hubby likes to be the one to find out the sex and announce it but Im liking your idea though cant put it to my hubby as he doesnt understand - he thinks so long as a baby is healthy the sex is no isssue. I have been calling this one "little man" since day 1 - always refer to him as a him or say your son to DH - sometimes he ignores it other times he says it could be a girl stop saying he but its my way of dealing with it - ve been doing it for 16 weeks now and actually feel ok with the idea of a boy as its as if im bonding already calling it a he.... if it is infact a girl it will be a bloody big shock !!! ha ha

[Bunneyfluff]

With ds1 we had a surprise and as I had no GD it was lovely. Ds2, still no real preference so didnt ask but we could see for ourselves what he was when the tech measured his femur! Ds3, wanted to find out as I wanted a girl and after we left the room I fled to the loo and cried. Then spent a few months feeling awful and guilty until I got used to the idea. Next time I will drive myself mad until I know so not knowing till birth will be too much. Although I have a friend who had GD with her second girl and didnt find out until birth and it was fine, I know I will have to know to be able to come to terms with it. But next time, I want to get the tech to let me try to figure out for myself. Then no one has to tell me 'it's a boy', and by finding out for myself I hope it will ease the GD if it is a boy. Last time the tech announced it right at the start of the scan and I was trying so hard not to let my feelings show I didn't enjoy the rest of the scan