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  1. #11
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    Rosie85's Avatar
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    I am on my third but had the same plan as you. Only 4 kids. I get a feeling I will have 4 boys and it makes me feel a little scared but I want 4 no matter what the sex, that fifth one would just be trying for a girl and I don't think that is fair or right. We don't always get what we want in life and honestly I never ever thought I wouldn't not have a girl you know? I mean what are the odds of all four being boys? Apparently high.... Is a bitter pill to swallow but like all other disappointments in life we move on and find a way to live in the happiest way possible. There will always be moments of what ifs and jealousy perhaps but living thinking of what you are missing, makes you miss what you already have so it's important to always appreciate what we have. This is the way I try to look at it anyhow.... My heart will always hold a spot for a daughter but if it's never filled I refuse to let it consume me and eat away at my other parts of my heart. Maybe after your fourth is born you will be able to picture a 5th and want another for more than just trying for a girl reasons.... You never know :-)
    DS 1 2008
    DS 2 2010
    DS 3 2013

    May 2014 at 5 weeks

    August 2014 at 12 weeks

    DD1 our beautiful rainbow baby joined us october 2015. No sway...just miracles.

  2. #12
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    fish2012's Avatar
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    Could well be ;-s 3&4!
    DS1 2009 DS2 2011



    At around fifteen weeks sadly one of our babies became an angel fx for a healthy singleton!

    *Update it's a girl! fx she'll make it!*

    Thank you atomic praying our dream will come true

  3. #13
    Dreamer

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    Im not pregnant yet, but I have 4 boys (3 from a previous and 1 with my husband) and hoping my 5th and his 2nd will be a lil girl cuz God knows I need some pink in ny life. Lol..
    Mom to (17) (11) (8) From a previous relationship and (6) and (2) with DH and a VERY unexpected or due 2-5-17

    Nov 2012.. Baby lost at 15 weeks 2 days Born into heaven (12-4-12)

  4. #14
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    iluvmy4sons's Avatar
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    I have 4 boys. I was really upset with I found out DS4 was a boy. I would not change him for the world. He is full of energy and life. He is a Momma's boy. Even though he did tell me he wanted to go to preschool cause he did not want to be my shopping buddy anymore I never saw myself with 5 children the most was 4. After awhile I decided to go for the 5th. My first son is not my husbands. I am still in shock that it is a girl. I really thought I was going to have my 5th son.
    Mom of and born July 18th 2013.

  5. #15
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    Thanks for your responses, everyone. Harleyquinn and Rosie, your posts really made me feel better. Thanks so much. I love this site. I can't really express these feelings to anyone IRL, my close friends are all going through their own hard times right now, and the last thing they want to hear is me whining about a healthy baby who isn't the "right" gender.

    I know I'll be okay; I remember how upset I was after finding out #3 was a boy, and yet I love that kid so much and would walk over hot coals and eat glass for him, lol. So I know I will feel that way about ds4, also. It is just taking some time for me to process the whole never having a daughter thing. I think I need to tell myself that it could happen, but not to focus on it completely, and to spend as much time and energy focusing on my boys as possible.
    2004 2007 2010



    It's a boy! Due 7/8/2013

  6. #16
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    Rosie85's Avatar
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    You are welcome, I love this site too. It's nice to be able to express our real feelings without being judged. Big hugs to you and all!
    DS 1 2008
    DS 2 2010
    DS 3 2013

    May 2014 at 5 weeks

    August 2014 at 12 weeks

    DD1 our beautiful rainbow baby joined us october 2015. No sway...just miracles.

  7. #17
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    I will know for sure in a week and 1/2. Have some indications of a dd on the way, but I am usually the odd man out. Having the hope of a dd and then having it taken is awful. I completely relate to what you feel and are going through. It is a strange blend of happy and sad, and not feeling free to talk about it makes it even harder because the guilt feelings creep in.
    8/2013

  8. #18
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    ((hugs)) jennaesue.

    I am ALWAYS available to point out the awesomeness of having four boys! I am so in love with my fellows, that it isn't hard for me to be very positive about the gender thing. Its actually very freeing to finally let go of it all and feel a sense of peace and contentment, I know you will get there.

    My baby is due in October and I am just splitting a gut to meet it!! I don't care what it is...just get heeeerrrrrre, I am so impatient to hold you baby!!

  9. #19
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    Hi Jennasue,

    Well I know exactly how you feel of course. After you I got my confirmation our third boy was on its way. I must admit I am still totally gutted and struggling to deal with it. I have actually contacted a lady here a psychologist just to talk things through as I really don't want to end up a bitter jealous old lady who has some psycho tendencies like collecting dolls or painting everything in pink! Or worse having a problem with any female grand children I might get (I reckon that was my grandmother's problem with myself and my sister...she hated us and loved my two brothers!). I really honestly thought....NO WAY will I be the one that ends up with all boys. I am so not a boy mom and loves clothes and dressing up and all things girlie. I also thought I did a good sway but no reading new developments from the collection of successful and unsuccessful sways I see I did a lot of things wrong...and I am beating myself up about that. I know I should probably just stop reading all that. Plus I wish I tried clomid! This has been a really tough pregnancy and hats off to all your ladies or your fourth or fifth pregnancy! I really don't think I can do a fourth plus the prospect of a fourth boy is just too much for me to handle. I am already dealing with the stupid comments and the "oh I am so sorry faces" from everyone here about a third one on the way. My two closest friends are due the same time and both are having girls. So while I am sure I will be coming around to the idea of the third boy the jealousy will be back with a vengeance when I see them with their little girls. God I would love to not feel this way....it's horrible. And this third guy never asked to be born...I always have to try and keep that in mind.

    I am sure your 4th will be your little prince Jennasue and he will give you lots of love and shower you in affection...at least that is what I am hoping my third will do for me. Hang in there....we only have just over three months to go. Thinking of you and mommyof3boys too of course....we were the few unlucky ones in a group!

  10. #20
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
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    I hope it's appropriate for me to post here.

    I wanted to say, I think having 4 boys is awesome. I think that there is something freeing in having a lot of one gender - rather than having to be "the boy" and "the girl" they can be "the artist", "the athlete", "the smart one", "the gamer" etc. I feel like it removes some of the pressure of the gender stereotypes, which IMO I feel like are currently much tougher on boys than on girls these days.

    I also read a book in favor of same-sex education where they talked about the cultures at some all-boy military schools, and the boys ended up being a lot more nurturing of one another. It was like in the absence of girls, they were more able to step forward and fulfill the nurturing roles that in a co-ed situation would have been derided as "girly" and I think the same thing can happen in a family setting as well. My older boys do dishes, babysit, cook etc etc etc in addition to mowing the lawn and washing the car, because there ARE no girls to do it. I've seen several families where the girls do girl stuff and the boys do boy stuff not because the parents set out to enforce sexist role models haha but more because the girls/boys kinda gravitated towards certain things and the parents just went with it, KWIM? I know rwo big all girl families and the same is true for them, the girls are more apt to do "boy stuff".
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