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  1. #1
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    Terrified of being disappointed

    I feel so bad even writing this. I am so afraid of being disappointed with the gender of my 3rd child. I have 2 heathly and happy boys but have always dreamed of having a girl. I have a week and a half left to go in my pregnancy and I haven't found out what I am having and I am now starting to stress that I won't bond with the baby if it's another boy and I feel so guilty over feeling this way. Has anyone got any advice how to deal with these emotions ?

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  2. #2
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    You don't have to feel bad.
    So do you have a week and a half until your baby is born (sorry if I misunderstand).
    I bet other women have more advice. But you could try:
    Buy something beautiful gender neutral? Or even something beautiful to wear for a boy? That might help? Do you already have a name? Choose one you always loved. Maybe if your DH knows about your feelings he lets you have the last word regarding baby's name? Or even if you choose the second name as one you have always loved?
    For some women it helps if they know there might be another baby in the future. Is that an option?
    Personally it helps me to see when others I admire are in the same or similar position. Do you know people with 3 boys you admire? Or are there some in your family you look up to? Or even stars or royals with 3 boys.
    To help bond make baby's arrival special. Maybe there is something you always wanted to have but were afraid or thought it's too expensive or whatever? Now is the time. With my third I had a doula and loved it. There are a lot of options. A friend did not breastfeed her first two but did her third and loved it.
    If you crochet, knit or sew, you could make something for the baby.
    I hope you get what you wish for. Good luck. ❤

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  4. #3
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    Yes I have that time left until we have the baby.
    We haven't picked a name . We are finding it very hard to settle on a name. I think that's part of the problem too. I've always had a name picked for a girl and feel like we won't ever get to use it. (My grandmother's name so it means alot to me ) .
    We had said 3 kids from the very beginning but I suppose nothing is written in stone . Just not sure it would be fair to keep feeling like I'm chasing a gender of a child rather than wanting that amount of children.
    Just really hoping if it's a boy that when he arrives I forget all about how I'm feeling now . Also that both of us are safe and well After wards too .


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  5. #4
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    That reason with the name is really sweet. Personally I would still search for a boy name you like/love. Maybe a name from someone else in the family? Or is the girl name maybe "convertible" into a boys name and you could use it as second name? This way you could still use the girls name if you do have another baby.
    I understand the thing with the number of kids. But I have seen a lot of people around me (and me) change their preferred number of kids. And ironically it's almost never because of the gender. For some people only the thought seems to help. One of my best friends wanted a boy, has two girls. They always said they wanted another to get their boy. But now they say they are fine. They like their live and they are happy.
    I hope you will be safe and happy no matter what you get in the end. I still think a few things you could buy might help to be excited even if it's a boy. A pretty blanket? A little summer hat? There are really pretty boy things. Or neutral, maybe that would help to overcome the feelings if it's a boy.
    Wish you good luck.

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  7. #5
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    Thanks for your kind words and taking the time to respond to me .

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  8. #6
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    Hey dear congratulations on your baby Girl


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