12 DPO Constant pink CM. Help?

[atomic sagebrush]

I took another pregnancy test this morning and it is slightly darker. I’m positive either I’m having a chemical at this point and I’m even more scared it could be ectopic since I had weird spotting days ago.. I can’t believe this is happening, I just want whatever is happening to be over with, I hope so bad it is not ectopic. I’m absolutely terrified I don’t know what to feel crying so bad

OK deep breath. It's ok. Spotting in early preganncy is SUPER common and ectopic pregnancies are rare. Please don't jump from pink CM to an ectopic pregnancy - that's like jumping from sneezing once to Ebola.

Most likely explanation is that you ovulated late and it's just early. Also likely is that it's a chemical (and while I know chemicals are hard, they are really common and most of the ladies on this site myself included have had at least one, and they don't cause any complications and you'll still be able to TTC this upcoming month, so don't stress over that.) It's even possible that you're just not getting dark tests yet due to dilute urine. That this is ectopic is so so so distant in likelihood that it's not worth even entertaining the idea right now, let alone getting upset over it.

I have a motto for dealing with my anxieties and it is "There will be time enough to worry when we know if there's really something to worry about." For right now, I want you to try to operate under the assumption that everything is ok (because it almost certainly is.) If you ovulated later than you think or have just gotten oddly light tests up till now, then all is well and we'll see the tests darken up in time. If you are having a chemical, it will resolve within the next couple of days. These are by far and away the most likely case scenarios here. And if in the far distant chance of ectopic, there is time to figure that out and they'd not be able to tell yet anyway, and would have you wait and see - so you'd still be in limbo for now.

What I do know is that getting really upset is not going to help either you or this pregnancy in any way. Remember, there will be time enough to worry when we know that there really is something to worry over. Right now, there isn't, and so I'll say congratulations and just know that we're out here for a sticky baby and sending you all the pink dust we can.

[Blessedbymybabies]

I know... it’s so hard to not be upset when I know all other previous pregnancies resulted in far darker lines by this point. The reason ectopic came to mind after the spotting is because I know it can produce hcg levels like a normal pregnancy but also another sign is slow rising HCG. I did get my levels drawn yesterday so I will have to wait in that. Im not even in the least happy about the line I got today Atomic Honestly I think it shows more in the picture and although it’s a tad darker than yesterdays, you can take my word when I say it’s incredibly faint. Especially looking back at it after an hour or so (because I save them to check..) I just can’t see how much farther my ovulation could have been when we had one attempt, if it was too far out the pregnancy would not have stuck and if it wasn’t far off I’m still 15 dpo... I honestly have no hope in myself for this one... but Atomic thank you for giving me hope. Reading your answer this morning got me through. <3 I’m praying so much I’m wrong. And that you are right again. So much.

[Blessedbymybabies]

Hi Atomic... I’m sorry to keep coming at you with questions, I hope I am not being a bother. Trying not to be obsessive about this but I POAS today and the line is again a little darker than yesterday’s, although it’s not nearly as dark as the Control line as id like it esp. since I’m past my missed period, so that’s why I’m asking this but looking at them is this a good sign of NOT being a chemical ?? A chemical would taper off from the start right, not get at all darker? I would like some honest reassurance. I will attach photo, yesterday’s test lighter one and today’s underneath it

[Blessedbymybabies]

IMG-9190.JPG

[katiemay]

That’s positive!! And it’s getting darker, so I would say congratulations! My experience with these kinds of tests are that they aren’t as sensitive as they claim to be. Many people don’t get good lines on them until they are late for their period by a week. If I was in your shoes, I would take a FRER or other branded test and I bet you’ll get great lines. Xx

[Blessedbymybabies]

Oh Thank you hun! I actually had my husband grab me a frer yesterday, I said if i woke up with another light test that I wasnt happy with I would use the same urine sample and try with a frer to compare, I never ended up using it because the test was darker I think my bean just took a while to implant or Ov. late. I think ill stop testing and let the blood work Doc gives me take it from here.

Im so happy Im pregnant now, this will be a hard one for me with two losses from two different problems with baby but I decided I will get help if I need. I really dont want everything to freak me out, I hate feeling like that. I did start spotting pink again yesterday night, very little but I had a small panic and remembered Atomics words. I cant change anything in the future and the situation right now is I AM pregnant. I think and hope itll be ok. Praying for a healthy pink peanut. And if you are swaying/ttc, sending those prayers your way too!

[atomic sagebrush]

no you're not bothering me at all, it just takes me a couple days sometimes to get through all the posts.

I want you to consider the possibility that nothing I say is really going to make you feel better here. I can't tell if your pregnancy is developing normally, I can't tell if it's ectopic. I just don't know and any assurance I give you would not be a guarantee. After all, pregnancies end very early on even if they're not technically chemicals, not to mention ending later on even when things seem totally normal. I just can't tell you if this pregnancy will work out and I don't want to mislead you and make promises about unknowns when I really don't know.

The latest test is darker, and that's a great sign. Right here and right now, you're pregnant, and I hope and pray that everything continues as it should be. I had a 5 day period (heavy) and ended up with a baby at the end of it. Just take it a minute at a time if need be - we are all here cheering you on and hoping that this is your rainbow.

[Blessedbymybabies]

Thank you Atomic. Please don’t feel that my crazy question asking is any implication that you don’t make me feel better. In fact, I know it may sound funny but I have read your previous reply below probably 10 times already. You made me feel so much better and every time I’m like Ok! Yes. Common sense. H

Hard experiences in life make you irrational. I absolutely know you are not guaranteeing anything, but simply thinking rationally as a person outside this pregnancy who knows a lot in this field, looking in. That someone who knows what they are talking about can tell you yes it could happen, but In your opinion that this and that most likely just will not happen, but such and such would most likely be. Or any advice in general. I absolutely understand. And that is a world of help to someone like me That has not told anyone about this pregnancy and probably will not for a very long time know for personal reasons, to have reassurance when anxiety from past experiences clouds my judgments to the point I was POSITIVE I had a chemical because of faded lines and then POSITIVE I had an ectopic for reasons like spotting? As if you can have both...

So to have you bring me sort of back to earth that there is a whole grey area in between. Thank you. I know you cannot know when I myself dont. People like me sometimes just need that slap back to reality, not so much a guarantee lol I used to feel bad for my mother she would always be the one I would "Unleash" my anxiety on but i feel i cannot even tell her about this one until im certain all is well... Biggest hugs to you. The thoughts may creep and everyone for different reasons but you keep everyone in check.

I keep reminding myself to worry when there is something real in front of me to worry about, as per your advice. XOX

[atomic sagebrush]

No not at all but I just got nervous when I read you wanted honest reassurance because I truly cannot give it. I wish I could but it's just beyond anyone's ability to know just yet.

I can say that the chances of ectopic are distant - that much I know. They happen but it's just not the first concern we'd have.

When I was pregnant with my last baby at 41 after 2 losses and my last pregnancy being high risk I just kept saying "stick with me baby, stick with me!" Every time I had those fears (and I expected to lose the pregnancy every second of every day - every time I went to the bathroom for 9 months and then for like 5 years after she was born, LOL) I just asked her to stay with me and even though it was totally psychological, it made me feel like I was doing something, and it helped calm me down.

we're all here hoping and that everything turns out ok.