Maybe number 4?

[Greydore]

Forever restless is one of your boys a baby still? Just asking since you mentioned not sleeping. If so, it does get better. My older boys are 5 and almost 3...and things are so much easier than even a year ago. They play really well, and some days they are so busy with each other I only see them when they are hungry or thirsty. That’s a big reason I felt okay have a third- I realized how fast my second son’s first year went by, and while it’s hard it’s over so fast. I wish you luck and peace in whatever you decide to do.

[ForeverRestless]

Forever restless is one of your boys a baby still? Just asking since you mentioned not sleeping. If so, it does get better. My older boys are 5 and almost 3...and things are so much easier than even a year ago. They play really well, and some days they are so busy with each other I only see them when they are hungry or thirsty. That’s a big reason I felt okay have a third- I realized how fast my second son’s first year went by, and while it’s hard it’s over so fast. I wish you luck and peace in whatever you decide to do.

Hi Greydore, took time to read the responses. Glad you made a decision, but in any case you have plenty of time to change your mind in case, so take it really easy imo!
Just enjoy your beautiful new addition! I had mine in April 2018 so yep it's still hard work.
Plus he is kinda high needs, but now that he crawls he's much better. At least he can do what he wants and doesnt use me as a living "balcony" lol!
Nights are still busy and i am going to be back to work mid January... i already feel overwhelmed! I am bad at organising and I feel that all this is just... too much to handle... i guess it's a problem that all working mamas have to face soon or late 😅
I am leaning towards no atm, mostly because I fear GD (I had pretty severe with DS2) and also because I feel I am struggling with 2. You give me hope that growing up the kids will be less needy and more indipendent. I pray that the day when they will just play and come to me just for some snack or so will come soon! Ahah!
I am 34 now so maybe there will be room for a new addition.. but first we need to adjust...
I am team "let's wait and see"... definitely!!😉😊

[JaneL]

I am so glad I found this thread.

I am in such a similar position to you all. I had my 3rd beautiful son in April 2018 who was a sway opposite.

I was so upset when I found out I wasn’t having a girl .....but as soon as I held him all those feeling went away and I fell totally in love! Greydore is right ....there is something so magical about baby no.3.

My husband and I agreed that we both wanted 3 kids but for a few months....all I could think about was having another baby. After a lot of thought I think I just hate the thought of never being pregnant again and never having a new born. When I think about no.4 I also think about the chance of a girl again.

But thank you atomic for you honest post - as much as I would love to be pregnant again ..... I’m scared I would spread myself too thinly. I am already so busy with 3 and I don’t want to take any more time away from them.

It’s a difficult decision - deciding between another baby and chance of a girl - or to just contentment myself and give all I have to my 3 beautiful sons

I just worry I would regret not having no4 but hate the thought of taking time and activities away from my boys xx

[atomic sagebrush]

Forever restless is one of your boys a baby still? Just asking since you mentioned not sleeping. If so, it does get better. My older boys are 5 and almost 3...and things are so much easier than even a year ago. They play really well, and some days they are so busy with each other I only see them when they are hungry or thirsty. That’s a big reason I felt okay have a third- I realized how fast my second son’s first year went by, and while it’s hard it’s over so fast. I wish you luck and peace in whatever you decide to do.

Yes please don't base any decision on the baby and toddler years. My small ones are now 6, 9, and nearly 11 and it is STILL very hard for me. I homeschool though in addition to working so it's just a very big task many days.

[Greydore]

Atomic you are supermom, do you sleep?! And while my older two are easier than used to be, they’re still really young and some days are really hard. Foreverrestless I also work, and although it’s chaotic (juggling the kids and the house is always a mess) I enjoy working and would be a very unhappy SAHM. I hope going back to work goes smoothly for you.

JaneL it’s funny, my husband and I were both wanting a 4th right after our thiedwas born. We were in that honeymoon phase of having a newborn (we were also both on parental leave so we had time together as a family that we don’t normally have). But when reality hit we both realized we were exhausted and stopped talking about it. I started birth control and asked my husband if he wanted to schedule a vasectomy, and he still doesn’t feel ready to do anything permanent. So for us we know we are open to another baby but are leaning towards no. I’m just having a hard time shaking that sadness of being done with that part of my life- it went too fast! (Yes, I know how silly this sounds).

I hope everyone keeps us updated on what they decide to do.

[JaneL]

That doesn’t sound silly at all Greydore - it sounds exactly like me.

My husband is also not ready to commit to a vasectomy and to be honest I’m not ready for something so permanent either! I’m also so sad about that stage of life being over because I have enjoyed it soo much but it does have to be over sometime!

I feel so complete with my 3 boys but I just hate the thought of never having another baby. Is that enough reason to have another one?

[atomic sagebrush]

Not well, LOL.

I would personally have you guys pick a non-permanent birth control unless you are a million billion % certain that you don't want another. WE have quite a few people on here who end up doing reversals, having the V done even though they were still sitting on the fence thinking it would help them make the decision and then they ended up regretting it. I am really not a fan of vasectomies for that reason - just too many people who've had regrets over it.

[Greydore]

Yeah I definitely agree. One of my friends has two kids, 11 and 8, and her and her husband now desperately want a third. He had a vasectomy reversal but they’re now having fertility issues.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yeah I definitely agree. One of my friends has two kids, 11 and 8, and her and her husband now desperately want a third. He had a vasectomy reversal but they’re now having fertility issues.

that's been the experience on here. I am wracking my brain trying to think of anyone who had the V reversed and then got pregnant easily and not coming up with anyone. Several people ended up having to do IVF evne with the V reversal and a few others had to walk away with no baby.

[JaneL]

Hi atomic -

We are leaning towards going for number 4! We said we would start to try in May ....

My plan is to get clomid, improve diet from previous sway and attempt to walk most days. Glass of wine in the evening. Lavender candle for bedroom.

Few questions
- would going vegetarian sway as much as le diet
- is it 1 bd in ovulation window
- is walking sufficient enough for a form of exercise

I’m currently still breastfeeding my 9month old and still haven’t got my period, hope it come soon.

Any other reccomandations?