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  1. #1
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    Question Review my future Blue sway please! (TTC#4 after 3 girls - 1 being after a 'failed' sway)

    Hello all,

    Well, here I am at it again – obsessing, again and it’s questions Galore!
    We probably will be TTC mid next year, if I can get hubby still happy with the idea by then…this would mean TTC mid winter here but can’t be heavily pregnant at the peak of summer, it near killed me last time so aiming for heaps of Vit D to compensate haha.
    Hoping we get our blue bundle this time around! Kinda secretly hoping for boy twinnies – because I know hubby will NOT cave for #5,even if this is a boy – but I have read so much about you guys saying little boys should come in pairs yadiyada – and I love the idea of them each having a buddy too ^^

    I have just finished weaning my 18 m.o daughter, so should have a good 10/12 months before TTC.
    My DD2/3 were conceived when their big sisters were 17 or 20 m.o – here DD3 would be at least 28m.o … hopefully a slightly bigger gap, more sleep (hopefully, still working on that ha!), will all be in my favour and balance out the fact that we will be older and probs less fertile (hence pink )
    My cycles have finally returned 4 months ago (never happened with my first 2 (AF returned around 10-11months PP for both), but then miss #3 co-slept after 1st wake up so nursed heaps at night which her sisters didn’t!). They are regular ish(so far mostly 27 days with a couple being 26 or 28). Some months I have slight spotting 2-4 days prior, others, straight into AF (not sure if that means anything) – my cycles have started coming in the mornings too (never did when I had my first 2 girls – only did this when swaying #3)…. and my libido is baaaack!
    We currently BD unprotected from ca. CD 9 max (as I sometimes O early) then protected until ca. CD19/20 (to be sure we are definitely out of possible fertile zone), when we go unprotected again until end of cycle.

    Since my cycles have returned, I am keen on the deed haha so most cycles it’s been EOD pretty much, except when kids/life get in the way ^^
    Especially now that we are falling into the “older parents” category – with me being 35 at time of TTC and him 42 – we want to improve our conditions so we are fit and fab :P and have the best possible sperm and egg for optimal chances of blue ^^

    I don’t want to go overboard either, and risk undermining our sway by falling into the “control freak that just decides to drop everything because it’s up to fate anyways” category even though the detail-orientated person in me needs to haha

    Currently applying for a new job, which would be challenging and pushing me – driving my competitive spirit
    I have started a few PT sessions just to get me started – and set up a routine I can do by myself at home, to get some weightlifting going: mainly using my own body weight. I want to prove to hubby that doing it on own at home will yiled results and I can stick to it – again, driving the competition as he goes to the gym (once only though, want o push Him to go more ^^) ad wanted me to go (IMO it’sd a waste of $$ as I am already running after time – at least at home can go with kids in bed etc
    ).

    Here are the vitamins I have noted to be as part of our regime (haven’t started on any yet) – will only do multi and probiotics for now – and add the rest in about 3 months prior to TTC. Is that ok?

    Vitamins for DH (daily unless advised otherwise)
    1) One a day multi men 50+ - should I add more vit D? (multi has 700ui)
    2) Fish oil 500mg (1000 every other day)
    3) Probiotics – do they have to be the refrigerated ones to be good?
    4) CQ10 (Ubiquinol)– 100 mg: is that enough?
    5) L-arginine 500mg – plus 1000mg cartinine
    6) 99mg Potassium - the multi doesn’t have any – should he add this?
    Does he need extra folate (multi has 400mcg) or zinc (recommendations are 100-200mcg – multi only has 24) ?

    Vitamins for DW (daily unless advised otherwise) –Spread the intake throughout the day
    1) One-a- day multi -should I aim for more vit D, especially since we will be TTC in winter? (multi has 1000ui)
    2) Fish Oil 500mg/day (mine has 1000 so doing 1 EOD)
    3) Probiotics
    4) Methyl folate 1000mcg (multi has 400mcg FA)- is that enough? 1000 Methylfolate and 400 FA
    5) CQ10 (Ubiquinol) – 100mg daily - is that enough - should I aim for 200?
    6) 99mg potassium - should I avoid this?
    7) Melatonin: is it worth taking in lead up to TTC for egg quality – but wean so that not taking any more by the time we do start TTC?? Or if I get enough natural sun, that would maybe suffice to get my natural melatonin production going?
    8) Resveratrol – needed at all? https://www.whitelotusclinic.ca/blog...rol-fertility/ It seems egg quality is improved with this…

    When attempting: I used Preseed with my 3 girls, so am hoping to avoid it and stick to just natural EWCM this time– some cycles I have plenty for days, others just a day and small amount…
    Take Guaifenesin at least 5 days prior to expected O – I just need to find the right version in the shops when the time comes: only use on attempt months or should I give it a go a few months before to see how/if it affects me?
    Trying to have big O at every BD session (and when not, finish the job myself lol) – is it worth having some ‘solo sessions’ before BD to get the right Ph down there?
    Water water and more water – and lemon water again..well, generally keep hydrated but not intending on overdoing it (maybe 2.5-ish per day max) ^^
    Fertility massage before O??
    Before O, coconut water - After O, pomegranate juice

    BD:
    EOD (~48hrs between BDs) from AF-O – follow the SMEP plan
    Going by my libido, and what hubby has been able to “deliver”, we should be able to BD at least once a day in the fertile window – life permitting
    Attempt night of 1st pos OPK, next morning and evening and again the day after – at least, on this point - more is more, right? haha
    Then resume EOD until AF or BFP

    Exercising – aim to gain lean muscle, and shed some fat – body reformation: https://www.fitnessbliss.com/en/ Blogilates Popsugar and TaiBo Gunnar Peterson Kick/boxing (have asked my DD1 to teach me some of her taekwondo moves to just get some “kickboxing” done – and she finds it fun to watch mummy so win win, as it motivates me to do it harder and better haha). Hubby goes to gym, but not enough (1/week): I want to challenge him – and prove I can get great results at home, so hopefully he will pick up the pace and we can both get good changes. We’re coming into summer, so we will be able to use the pool and get in some swimming too.
    Doing 45 minutes sessions 3/week with weights – and a couple of lighter sessions (HIIT)
    BMI as of now: 168cm for 58kgs = 20.5. The biggest I have ever been non pregnant (was 53kg when fell pregnant with DD1, 51kg when feel with DD2, and about 55 with DD3…I’ve been at this weight for a year and it hasn’t budged lol).
    Aiming to not lose weight in the process (or 1-2max) but build muscle mass instead – not too fussed about the # on the scales, just want to feel strong and fit/lean overall

    Food – Atkins, HCG diets?
    No coffee at all in attempt months – otherwise, reducing gradually from now onwards (I have maybe 4-5/week) – and aiming for only black tea by the time we start TTC.
    Always eat carbs+ protein – but small portions, more often
    I like my carbs and that is the hardest, not eating toooo many – just enough to balance things and still not be starving :P I think I still ate too many carbs and not enough protein last time alas  what is the current view on wholegrain over refined? i.e. am I always better off going for the wholewheat/grain/brown option (brown over white rice and pasta / wholemeal bread over white…)?
    Cereals: I know cereals seem to sway – in an attempt to eat healthy, I would tend to do overnight oats or oatmeal (with greek FF yogurt /milk and berries & nut butter for ex.) for brekkie (alternating with egg/cheese/tomato wrap)– but this is obviously not fortified.
    So I could alternate these with a cereal: any recommendation? Most are high in sugar, i.e. empty carbs, so not ideal. We don’t have as many options here in Australia as maybe the US or Europe so need a basic that is readily available: fortified granola with nuts (the catch is the fortified ones are the more processed and hence sweeter ones)? Cheerios?

    Avocado – 1/ day when in season
    Lemon – equivalent of 1 lemon /day in water (approx. 2-2.5L) – Coconut water: drinking 1L/week (small glass/day – hubby too most days) – getting a small glass of multi vitamin juice (or pineapple/orange) most days (fortified)
    NYE – eating on salad, pasta etc / using Brewers yeast in baking
    Nuts – a small handful a day (almonds, cashews, walnuts mainly) – giving hubby some for snacking too (mix but adding brazil nuts!)
    Fats/proteins – red meat (buying grass fed mince) at least once every few days / alternating with chicken, dark cuts where possible – overall, aiming for 100g of protein /day with most being animal based (eggs,FF greek yogurt, milk and meat as main source – olive oil or butter for cooking and olive oil/avocado oil for salads). Fish (brramundi or Slamon) twice a week max.
    I’m not big on cheese – can do Haloumi (grilled – added to sandwich or salad), Mozzarella (salad or on pizza) or cheddar (in grilled cheese sandwhich for instance): i.e. you won’t see me scoffing down a Brie or Blue (yuk!) lol
    Fruits: last time ate a fair few bananas lol so not going to eat them purposefully – only if I feel like it. Aiming for berries, apples,
    Veggies: Leafy green salads, green beans, sweet potato (better than potato), tomatoes, garlic, onions, carrots, capsicum (I think you call these bell peppers in the US?), zucchini, eggplant etc avoid the very starchy ones maybe?
    Pulses are a great source of protein – is it worth having them as well as a protein, instead of (or to assist reducing the carbs) say pasta or rice to bulk up the protein in a meal (say chickpeas or lentils)?? i.e. chicken curry with chickpeas, served with rice and vegetables

    Superstition
    – will have an amethyst gem on me at all times
    Place a baby boy outfit under my pillow

    If you read all of this – thank you!!
    I will be buying a personalised plan, but want to wait until we are 6 months from TTC so probably around the new year ^^
    Lucky Mummy to 4 sweet divas
    (2013) (2015) (2018) (2021)
    (July 2014) (November 2023)
    Our sway didn’t work for #3 & we had a little oops for #4 but we love them all to bits... not sure if we ever will but somehow hoping we might add blue to the crew, to complete our family, one day...

    Fingers crossed for TTC #5 (again) for early 2024!

  2. #2
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    That saying should actually read "boys should come in pairs like shoes or else have lots of big sisters to spoil them!"

    This is long so anything I don't specifically mention is from me

    RE going to the gym - I got 2 of my 4 boys working out at home, one working a really physical job, and the other one doing nothing, so I PROMISE you can get boys working out at home. I truly think going to the gym for many of us IS a huge waste of money and time and I have complete confidence you can get just as good a sway on your own (and without contracting the sicknesses that virtually everyone is always picking up at the gym! I have so many blue swayers who get sick at the gym...or their kiddos do)

    Hubs does not need the potassium. NO he should not take extra zinc, I'm not sure where you're getting that dose from but I don't want to see anyone take more than 30 for men and more like 15/20 for ladies. He doesn't need more D if he gets any sunlight or drinks milk/dairy but can take a little more if you want. The 100 coq10 is fine.

    For you, the One a Day has the Vit. D I recommend unless you have a proven deficiency. I like you guys on 2000 folate total so I'd add in another. I do not recommend potassium supplements. PLEASE do not take melatonin. There is NO reason for it, zero, none, and by taking it you can end up getting dependent on it (trust me on that, sigh) and it really can mess up your sleep for quite some time. This is aside from the possible harm it can cause since it must not be taken during pregnancy and you can't take it till pregnancy and then wean off, there's not enough time for that. Your body makes all the natural melatonin it will need and it's better not to mess with that. Your egg quality is likely fine, you aren't doing IVF and won't need to make dozens of eggs in one month, please no one TTC naturally ever take melatonin any time aroudn when you are TTC. I don't think reservatrol is necessary, it's optional, but do be aware I have no real idea how it sways and haven't seen enough people take it to have a feel for how it sways and if it's safe.

    Re Big O - I have found that trying too hard with the Big O to have lots of them has ended up really stressing people out and making them basically hate sex, LOL. Please don't push yourself to have any more than you want to. It really does backfire if you make it a chore and there's never been any hard evidence that excessive female orgasms even sway blue. Just have however many orgasms your body enjoys and no more than that.

    Same with water - drink to your level of thirst, no more than that.

    I'm going to post this first half now and finish up later.
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  3. #3
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Great job on the exercise and your weight. Keep it up!

    PLEASE no Atkins or HCG Diets. That's the last thing we need right now.

    Personally I never had any shortage of carbs when I got my boys, LOL. Don't overthink that...remember, protein + carbs = boys (this is why you should stay away from Atkins, in addition to it not being safe when TTC.)

    RE your breakfasts, I'd stick with the ones you're having, those are both phenominal. Then I'd save the cereal for a snack. I rarely ate cereal for breakfast but often had it as a snack when I got my boys. I would hate to see you drop such nice brekkies just for some dumb old Cheerios, LOL. Have those as an easy snack instead. Do u guys have Weetabix? A lot of girls eat that.

    Avocado is great but 1 a day is a lot of avocado. If you need to cut back on something I'd have this only 2-3 times a week. Not because it would sway pink, but because you're going to be stuffed to the gills otherwise!

    meats

    No worries on the cheese, I've always been a cheese lover and got my boys that way but many cultures worldwide don't eat cheese at all ever and get plenty of boys!

    I truly believe bananas undermine blue sways. People waste all these calories eating bananas (plus they're pure sugar/starch without much else going on) trying to get potassium they can get more of other ways. Ditch them, berries and other stuff is the way to go!

    no need to avoid starchy veg unless you're already full of avocado.

    Yes absolutely pulses are a great addition. I often had bean burritos with my boys for lunch; I would mix up a batch of burritos and I'd have them for lunch for several days in a row. I also ate potato and pea curry quite a lot especially with #2 and #4. I really think variety is the spice of a boy-friendly diet.

    Oh and somewhere, not seeing it now, you asked about whole grains vs. white. This is a big unknown of swaying. I don't have enough data to say, and information seems to point both directions. My thinking is that you guys should have what you like, maybe a compromise having white pasta and white rice and then whole grain bread. But the idea we had to have whole grain everything for blue has not panned out, and I"d not go out of my way to eat whole grains. In fact, many people are finding very little room in their diet for grains at all - although I certainly ate scads of them when I got my boys so I hesitate to ahve you guys give them up!

    Please let me know if I missed anything!
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  4. #4
    Dreamer

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    LMSM, hello again. This is a serious looking sway, wow, impressive. I would love to ask about your plan for the actual attempt. Last time you swayed did you test for Ovulation? I’m not sure what SMEP is. Did you make the attempts when you were at peak fertility (according to test) or how did that work? And are you planning on repeating this pattern? Thank you so much.

    I had a very strange test this month. I’m have been testing my ovulation just to get comfortable with how it works before my attempt. This month I tested for three days in a row. The first two days showed nothing and the last day showed “peak fertility” so I skipped “high fertility”. Didn’t expect that and not sure why it happened.

    I’m just curious to know how you determined your O day last time and want to understand on which days you attempted.


    Thank you so much!

  5. #5
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    Katie, SMEP is Sperm Meets Egg Plan and you can find it here: Sperm Meets Egg Plan

    It's not uncommon to go straight to peak, but I think it happened this month because you didn't start testing early enough. Many of the tests need a baseline of low fertility to start with, then it can tell when you're getting more fertile and going to peak. Since you only tested 3 days, the test started off "thinking" "well ok I must be on low fertility now" and it was only when you went up to the peak it was like "oh crap it's happening now" LOL. If you start testing sooner, it will "see" the low reading, and then be able to detect when it increases to high, then again when it goes to peak.
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  6. #6
    Dreamer

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    Hi Atomic thank you for the reply. That is fascinating. I will start testing earlier next month since it’s my attempt month it will be crucial to get it right. But even if I didn’t test early enough (this month) , the Peak the test showed me was still accurate, yes? Is it possible to see peak two days in a row? (This didn’t happen but I’m just curious) I don’t want to mess anything up

    Lastly is the morning the best time to test? The ovulation kit says first thing in the morning but many other places (like SMEP) link above it says test in the afternoon?

    I am sticking to my plan, but just curious doesn’t smep sway blue?

    Thank you for tirelessly answering all of our questions ��
    Last edited by Katie.Z; October 16th, 2019 at 04:32 PM.

  7. #7
    Dream Vet
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    Oh Atomic, thanks so much!!! You’re a saint

    I will skip the supps that you recommend avoiding & up the folate for sure.
    Might up hubbys vit D just to be sure he is getting
    Enough

    WIll only eat the fortified cereals as an easy snack _ works better for me like that anyways lol am also eating nutty muesli bars when I have nothing else as it’s portable and quick. I am hoping to start making some less sugary home made versions soon, like larabars style

    I really think I need hubbys swimmers to improve...that is one thing that worries me. I will try to see my specialist (for my endometriosis) as he is also a fertility specialist - and see fin I can convince him to do an AMH test for me and’ and SA for DH...it would put my mind at ease to know we still have ok #s ( 4 almost 5 year same ago my amh was great but 7-8 year same ago DHs sperm was just average so imagine now )

    Katie, can see Atomic responded on the SMEP it definitely sways blue!

    On the Opks, I know I have short LH surges so need to start testing early And more than 2/day...maybe testing at least 3 times per day will allow you to catch the surge. Having said that, last time I used the cheap opks and the dual Clearblue opk monitor - 1st day I tested on the cb it was high and next straight into’ peak...blink it and you’ll miss it lol
    Some opks require fmu (like Clearblue) but most of the simple strips are best from midday until early evening as the LH builds up during the day.... so I would do both a to the same’ time yo make sure they « marry up » iykwim?
    (So CB in the am then a few iC strips after lunch ish to confirm etc)
    Does that make any sense?? Lol

    Now to your actual question re last sway and’ BDs.
    Yes, I used opks (both cheap strips and CB): we BDd on CD 10 am (high fertility/negative opk), then whenI got my peak reading the next day I think it was, we BDd that night and the next (couldn’t do the am). I ovulated around CD 12 early 13 .
    I also tracked my basal body temperature so I could retrospectively confirm O.
    I’ve copied my chart so you can see

    AAA5C058-4104-43F0-8830-4DEB014CF33F.jpg
    I intend on more Bds - as my LH surge seems short my window of opportunity between pos opk and O is limited and I do seem to O quite early in my cycle..so need to bd heaps from CD 8-13 i think lol
    Last edited by LMSM; October 16th, 2019 at 06:45 PM.
    Lucky Mummy to 4 sweet divas
    (2013) (2015) (2018) (2021)
    (July 2014) (November 2023)
    Our sway didn’t work for #3 & we had a little oops for #4 but we love them all to bits... not sure if we ever will but somehow hoping we might add blue to the crew, to complete our family, one day...

    Fingers crossed for TTC #5 (again) for early 2024!

  8. Thanks Katie.Z, atomic sagebrush thanked for this post
  9. #8
    Dreamer

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    LMSM thank you, makes perfect sense. Such great advice!

  10. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Katie.Z View Post
    Hi Atomic thank you for the reply. That is fascinating. I will start testing earlier next month since it’s my attempt month it will be crucial to get it right. But even if I didn’t test early enough (this month) , the Peak the test showed me was still accurate, yes? Is it possible to see peak two days in a row? (This didn’t happen but I’m just curious) I don’t want to mess anything up

    Lastly is the morning the best time to test? The ovulation kit says first thing in the morning but many other places (like SMEP) link above it says test in the afternoon?

    I am sticking to my plan, but just curious doesn’t smep sway blue?

    Thank you for tirelessly answering all of our questions ��
    Yes the peak is so noticeable that the strips pick it up. The shift from low to high is much more subtle than that which is why it can get "confused".

    The Clearblues are supposedly calibrated to work in the morning, but honestly I think we get better results after lunch anyway provided you can keep from drinking tons of fluids.

    Yes, SMEP sways blue. I'm not sure what your question is here. If you're asking me why I don't use it for everyone if it sways blue I'm happy to explain that (and also explain why it wasn't in your plan) if that's what your question is.
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  11. Thanks Katie.Z thanked for this post
  12. #10
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    LMSM if there's any way to swing the sperm analysis it might put your mind at ease, but I doubt you guys truly need it. I seriously, seriously doubt that any couple with 3 babies is having any kind of serious male factor infertility.

    fine to BD before the fertile window opens; let's go easier on the early attempts (like CD8-10) and heavier on the later ones (CD 11-14). I don't want to see you with scads of too-early attempts and then have hubby taper off once the window is truly open.
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