A little late posting this but here goes...

[coocoobananas]

So I came to this site in 2012. My husband told me after 2 boys and some gd after #2 that if I wanted to try for a girl he was ok with 3 1 was enough for him and he was done at 2! We have 4 kids now lol!
Some how I stumbled on this site after I had a friend tell me she had cranberry juice and some other stuff and got her girl...now I know it was most likely her 3 miscarriages between her 1st and girl was the actual reason! She went on to have an oopsie boy after
I followed the diet very closely, lost 10 pounds, had 2 months of bfns and little miss impatient didn't listen to atomic and made multiple attempts instead of sticking to one! In my defence, my 2nd guy was a one time only deal but I'm pretty boy friendly, very healthy and a veggie!
I got a bfp and turned into my beautiful boy Wyatt! I am so glad I screwed up although after his u/a I was devestated, like sobbing in the closet type thing. Such a horrible feeling knowing how lucky I was to have him yet feeling so unlucky I couldn't have just one girl. I still feel immense guilt for that.
Well he came on a year and hubby and I were away from home with no protection (he was not wanting to get snipped) and we attempted the 'pull out' method for birth control.
In our 18 years together we never used this method once...and the one time we did...fail!!
But heck, at the end of a very long road I got her! Emmerson. The name I had since my second boy. I knew I wanted boys for children's and at least one of each so I feel incredibly lucky although overwhelmed with my outcome! (2 under 2 is hard!!!!)
I also promised my birth story so here goes!
I had pretty good pre labour Friday and the night before and was feeling so done that hubby decided to start his leave that day but I found him annoying so told him to just go back to work til I was in labour for sure. Saturday rolled around and I had nothing happen til 7:15pm. I went to pee, say on the couch and felt a small gush. I was in denial at that point as I wanted something to happen for so long that I assumed I was over thinking and it was just pee! But I just went so I stood up put some tp to catch anything else and it did keep happening.
I had to go to the hospital asap because I have that strep B thing so I have to get antibiotics so as much as I wanted to go into labour, I didn't want my water to break because then I couldn't labour at home
I went in and started the real labour at about 10pm or so I thought! I always forget lol!
I was standing up rocking and leaning on the bed through them and the nurse asked if I felt any pressure. I said yes so she checked me...it was just pressure from standing so I was only a 4 and thought it was going to be long so I took some fentenal. I forgot you have to be monitored and stay in bed so I kinda wish I didn't as it's not like it seems to do much for me in the pain department but the little high is a good distraction between contractions
It's a bit of a blur after that. All I know is the fentenal slowed the contractions down but when I got one they were about 10x worse when they were spaced further apart. I felt so wimpy this time. I just wasn't handling things near the end as well as I remembered I did previously. I felt the pain was gettin pretty bad (I was using gas at this point) that I must be transitioning so they got the resident to check. I was an 8. Again, a blur but very quickly after It intensified even more, I felt I was going to loose it and was trying to think how I could get out of it so I also knew I was probably close to 10!
They checked me again and the resident said 'you're still around a 7 or 8!'
I almost lost my shit!! I didn't believe him as it couldn't possibly get more intense then that, I was loosing my mind!
Then I felt pressure and without thinking my body just started pushing and I didn't care what anyone said. The nurse told him that she thought he should check again as she saw me bearing down.
Of course I was a 10, I could have told anyone that! The nurse later said he must have checked wrong and I wasn't actually an 8 because it was so quick.
Anyway sorry I'm rambling,
So I basically pushed her out in 6 minutes. Right after she was born I looked up at my husband and his eyes were as big as saucers!! I was like 'whats wrong?' And he said 'nothing' and I asked him why he was looking like that then?
Turns out the cord was around her neck and the doctor basically yanked her out fast. She apparently had a blue head and bleAch white torso and the colour wasn't returning as soon as it should according to hubby's previous experience! They took her to the incubator table and helped her breath with the mask. I was def in protective mode or just too exhausted to worry but I just knew it would turn out ok. She had help for what seemed to be a long time but apparently hair a couple minutes and then she was just fine
They continued to give me gas for my gazillion stitches and I realized how strong it was at that point. It was beautifully relaxing but I kept almost passing out. It was scary as I guess cause I was high, I was thinking I was passing away...it was horrible actually. I would pull it away from my face and be fine but then the sewing was excruciating! So I would put it back. I was so out of it, blech.

When I looked over at her, I didn't think of her as a girl for quite a while but then I did and I started crying. I didn't care that she was a girl because I just loved her like I knew I would love another boy. But I also felt this overwhelming calm, finally that feeling that I longed for for so long was there. A weight lifted off my shoulders. No more wonder of who she might look like or if she actually existed.
I knew I would have her but never thought I would, if that makes sense.
I can just focus on them now and not have that nagging sad feeling lingering. I feel so incredibly lucky and never thought I would be.
I love my boys even more now, I don't know how. They love her and I can get on with things.
I am incredibly grateful to this site. If it wasnt here, I wouldn't have my 2 youngest children. I'd be back at my boring job probably thinking I would rather be home like I am now with more babies (even though 2 under 2 is f****ing rough!!!)
So thank you for my babies both blue and pink<3
I wish everyone could have this feeling!
~Leigh

*Sorry for the poor writing, it's from my phone and I've left and come back a couple times to finish it so it's a bit discombobulated!!

[coocoobananas]

Here's some recent picsAttachment 22940
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[kitkat18]

Wonderful Leigh! So lovely to hear your story , gender dreaming sure is a special place. Your daughter Emerson is soooo gorgeous and it must be the best feeling in the world to have that calm and peace X

[luvmyfam]

Such a great story!! Thanks for sharing .

[Kittybear]

Lovely story, congratulations! Sorry for all the stitches though; they are the worst!

I so hope to experience that peace you describe. 1 day maybe...

Btw the links for your photos didn't work for me? I'm on my phone but it's not usually a problem... ? Weird lol

Xx

[bunnywabbit]

Thanks for sharing your experience with us, congrats on your little girl!

I can't see the photos either :-(

[atomic sagebrush]

So happy for you Coocoo!!! We have been on this journey together for so long I am so thrilled to read this very happy ending!!

[The Anchor]

LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE!!! So so so happy for you, what an incredible ending!

[hotdogz&boyz]

I wanna see pics!!! (Stamps feet because the links dont work. Lol).

But I am so very happy for you having your little Emmerson. Isn't it amazing to see her big brothers love on her? It was a surprise to me how much my big guys would adore their little sister. But, be warned, now that J is 18 months, they give her anything she wants and I have the feeling it's going to turn ugly pretty soon because she thinks she is the boss of the house.

I gotta give you props for getting stitches without gas at points. With my second the doc "didn't realize" I hadn't had pain medicine or an epidural when he went to stitch me...and I'll say it was almost an out of body experience how much that hurt. You are a strong lady.

[coocoobananas]

I'm not sure why they aren't posting? I've never had a problem before...
I'll try again!